EB1
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Joined: 7/31/2006
Msg: 26 | |
| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 12:00:28 PM | I would get married again.
I have been married once before. I got married when I was young(22 almost 23) and in the end we were just not compatible or even ready to get married.
I have learned from that experience great deal. So yes, I would get married again. | |
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EB1
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Joined: 7/31/2006
Msg: 27 | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 12:22:17 PM |
I see from a couple of the responces that a few women have the idea that, not only they wouldn't marry, living together wouldn't be an option on top of that.
These women also want long term just not in the same house hold... Isn't that kinda throwing the intire idea of being a long term couple out of the window? What future could one actualy expect from a situation like that..... Whats the piont of even getting involved??? I'm not knocking them,just kinda baffled by this type of logic. Sounds like someone that's been hurt bad & is affriad to give it one more shot....
I can understand that some people may have a different idea of what entails a relationship than others. I've had both common-law and marriage relationships. I have found that I don't function well, and am not very happy when I don't have my own time and space... it ends up being an irritant to me which is not healthy to my relationships. It's not his fault, it's not my fault... it's just the way I am built. I have ADD and get overloaded quite a bit, and the best way for me to become centered again is to be alone...sometimes for a few days. Well, that wouldn't be fair to a partner now... If he had his own place I could just say, "okay, go home...I need to be alone and center myself...we'll get together in a few days..I'll call you later if you want". I am also an artist, when I am in the middle of a project I need to focus on that..I can't be distracted all the time...and I have found VERY few guys can handle that. Most seem to NEED attention..a lot. These are the reasons why I have considered trying something different.
Also... I just have never really bought into the "traditional" relationship. I'm not a domestic goddess..I despise housework (though it HAS to be done) I do most of my own repairs and stuff. I love to work and enjoy my career, I enjoy being able to support myself... and the independance and self-esteem that comes from that. I'm not terribly interested in a "handyman" type (though I appreciate someone who can turn his hand to many different things) I guess I am more interested in a deep friendship with a lover, than a traditional relationship. Being older has given me the freedom and self-assurance to be able to offer my care, love, concern, friendship and my sexuality to someone who is also my best friend... but not in any way my possession. I want to know we are together because we WANT to be, and that we enhance each others lives without sacrificing our individual identities and pursuits. Some people can do this in the context of marriage...I can't. I think I'm a bit of a wild animal that way...I don't mate well in captivity. The strangest part of his for me is that it has NOTHING to do with a monogamous commitment.. I am naturally monogamous... I just can't stand being around anyone ALL THE TIME.
This is how it is for me right now... I am opening my mind and heart to alternative ways of being in a relationship... and isn't that what life is about really? expanding oneself? It is for me. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 2:28:35 PM | OP,
You are only looking at this from your point of view. Many people have good, enduring relationships without marrying or living together. It is up to te individuals involved. It sounds like you really want to get married. Cool...the date women who are marriage-minded.
Im not sure by what you say if you have ever been married. Its not always what it is cracked up to be. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 2:33:26 PM | | I've never done so myself, but have had a couple of close calls and will be eternally grateful that I didn't go there. I've had a lot of people tell me that I haven't missed much. Despite not knowing very many happy couples (I do know a few), I wouldn't rule it out if I met someone who I couldn't live without. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 2:33:56 PM | | I've never done so myself, but have had a couple of close calls and will be eternally grateful that I didn't go there. I've had a lot of people tell me that I haven't missed much. Despite not knowing very many happy couples (I do know a few), I wouldn't rule it out if I met someone who I couldn't live without. Most of the women I know who are divorced would not marry again. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 4:03:30 PM | OP, yes it does seem that most people would just rather live together. I've done that and then married after 9 years. Just to split 5 later. The first one lasted 19 years, till I found out he liked other women (lots of them) more. Yup, two huge mistakes in my life. But.......... with the right man, one who treats me the right way, talks to me as an equal, treats me as an equal and is totally committed to me.... of course the feelings need to be there too.............. you betcha I would. I don't intend to spend the rest of my life alone. I'm "couple" oriented I guess. I like having a man in the house, my man.
Some people will say, "It's just a piece of paper anyway." Well, yes it is but, it's the most inportant piece of paper a couple in love will ever have.
Blonde  | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 6:48:49 PM | | This is a tough question for me-After my divorce I was sure that I would never marry again. And if I never do then I am ok with that. However, there is that side of me that likes to think that I just made a mistake the first time around and there is one out there for me. I would live with someone first before ever considering marriage again. And probably for a long time. He would have to be someone truly special though for me to say "I do" again | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/6/2008 7:32:40 PM | | I definately want to get married again someday. I'm not knocking myself out to run out and find myself a husband...but I refuse to rule it out. Even though my 1st (and only) marriage didn't work out... I know that not all men are like my ex husband. As for living together....thats not happening until ,I marry again. Until then any man I get involved with , will maintain a separate household. For one I'm feeling very territorial about my home. Secondly ,I have a 6 year old son and that wouldn't send a good message to him, thirdly.....breaking up after living together is not a "softer" break up financially or emotionally. I have seen plenty of people go through that. Even if you were not married...both names could have been on the lease, mortgage and/ or utility bills. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/14/2008 6:24:54 PM | Been there and done it twice. Would probably do it for a third time - but still married to 2nd one.javascript:smilie(' ')
I find the comfort of a spouse wonderful - but when you turn into the maid/taxi driver/ dishwasher and other domestic servants all rolled up into one and you start feeling taken for granted. That's what drives me to this site. I am no longer the lover and confidant of my spouse - so next! | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/14/2008 7:00:57 PM | | I would not marry again. I do still believe in love and companionship, but on a different level than marriage. I think people get caught up in what a marriage is supposed to be and focus on the day to day parts of their lives. They forget about remaining friends, sharing things and spending real time together, because there is always something else that "needs" to be done. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 6:53:27 AM | Kynnie - thanks for your thoughts on common law marriage, shed a different light for me.
I don't think I will marry again, I was screwed over by my X and the legal system when he cheated and walked out.
I really do not beleive in divorce - lost my best freind and broke my family apart.
Before we got married, we agreed we would always work it out - whatever.
I made a promise to God and in front of our families. I don't know if I could make that same promise again. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 7:20:33 AM | RE: “Would I get married again?”
Ohhhhh that is a hard one… Could go either way because is more about the connection and life we share then a legal document for me… It would really depend on what the man that I am with would like…
RE: “Is this just a thing of the past or is there still interest in it. We live in a disposable culture now days. Living together seems to be the easier softer way, is that for the easier softer break up???? What’s your real views on it....”
I don’t think it has anything to do with a “disposable culture” or “softer way”. The reality of the situation is it is a HUGE expense for a one-day wedding -- I would rather we take the money and travel and/or put it towards our home. I think as one gets older they are more about building a life together then focusing on the fairytale day of a wedding. A relationship and building a life together has so much more to do with the entire picture rather then one day. As for marriage, I don’t think one needs a legal document to prove ones commitment and love to someone (and after 6 month of living together it s common law anyways)…
The commitment ceremony (or wedding day) is a nice gesture to each other – showing the world you choose this person, but I don’t think it s seen as a “means to an end” as it once was ((((ummm but the gifts are a nice touch though lol)…
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 7:25:54 AM | I JUST got this from a freind and have been 
Had to share....
Installing A Husband...
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance -- particularly in the
flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend
5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable
programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the
system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no
avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate
-------------------------------------
Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while
Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: "I Thought You
Loved Me.exe" and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the
Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5
But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to
default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a
very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the
background that will eventually seize control of all your system
resources).
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are
unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying
additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food
3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck,
Tech Support | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 8:55:14 AM | Right now, the answer would be no. But in the future if I met someone again, and had an awesome connection wth for at LEAST 5 years, I would consider it.  | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 9:36:45 AM | This is the opposite of my situation--I've never been married, and would like to be. In theory. I've already got my OWN ducks in a row--emotionally, financially, etc--now I want to see what it would be like to share all this greatness with someone.
It's scary to see that so many women do NOT want to go back to being married. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 9:39:17 AM | The day I get married again you can stop worrying about global warming cuz h*** will have frozen over. I've felt so screwed over at times that I refuse to throw myself on a grenade even to save the world. So you all better learn how to tread water.  | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 12:07:09 PM | Nyet.
Nada.
Nary.
No! NO!
None for me thanks, trying to cut down on my being b1tched at about everything and nothing I did in particular mind you .... just 'cause I'm there.
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 1:45:43 PM | | I'm not sure I could get married again. I don't think there's a man out there who treats me as well as my husband does...anyone else would be a major disappointment. | |
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| How many women would get married again
Posted: 1/15/2008 1:59:08 PM | I will definately entertain the thought of marriage again. I am still a traditionalist at heart.
I am not worried about my assets etc. I also think that there are ways around it to protect both parties. Sign a prenup agreement.
No big deal
But yes, if I am blessed with finding the right person I want to spend the rest of my life with I want the marriage. The life long commitment.
Now would I do it quickly, and rashly nope.. and if I even entertained the thought. I would hope one of my friends would take me out behind the woodshed.. | |
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