|
|
|
|
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 9:01:45 AM | Why are you interested James?
Im not sure, I reckon you could make ken dodd look like Brad Pitt.... I dont lower my standards anywhere below rock bottom!
Sorry! x
ooo! she shoots and scores!!! lol | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 9:15:01 AM |
Why are you interested James?
Im not sure, I reckon you could make ken dodd look like Brad Pitt.... I dont lower my standards anywhere below rock bottom!
Sorry! x
ooo! she shoots and scores!!! lol
Meh. I'm sure that was the highlight of your week, but I remain indifferent to you. | |
|
| |
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 10:07:34 AM | This is a question that I have seen countless times, and have seen countless people ask.
For me, this perspective is completely different. I wont deny the fact that I think girls who sleep around are Sluts. In my 'book', a girl that does sleep around, is a Slut, however, the same would apply to a guy in my case.
I don't think highly of Guys who sleep around. I know a lot of other guys do though, and guys that sleep around are suppose to be these studs, when in actual fact, they're not really any better than a girl who does it.
Chances are anyway, that a guy who sleeps around wont case whether a girl is a Slut or not.
Thats my take on this subject anyway. | |
|
svj
|
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 105 | |
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 11:33:06 AM | I've said this a few times before on the same style threads, but it's a bad day on the markets... again. So here I go.
"Slut" is a term used to describe a woman that the speaker is jealous of for having more fun than he/she is.
example: "Look at her out there on the dance floor, shaking her booty around like that! Look at all those guys drooling over her! What a slut!"
"Slut" can have positive meaning when spoken by men about their partners... and when done in this way, is used to indicate her sexual prowess.
=================================
Men are typically congratulated for having a large amount of sexual partners for two reasons, as I understand it:
1) For the majority of men, getting laid is hard work. Other men appreciate this, and give status to other men accordingly.
The difficulty, and thus the status gains amongst other men, is in direct proportion to two factors:
a) The attractiveness of the woman he gets (ie. the level of competition he has to overcome to be the most attractive suitor in her eyes)
b)The strength of her "slut reflex" that needs to be overcome. (Wait! I shouldn't do it! Will be regarded as a "slut"? Does he really cares for me? What will my friends think? etc. etc. etc.)
Of course, no man thinks of it in terms of hard numbers, but it's a pretty effective demonstration.
Male sexual status amongst other men = highest degree of difficulty woman he can bed = Her attractiveness X Her "slut reflex".
Take each on a scale of 1 to 10. If his best score is roughly a 6 in attractiveness (in the eyes of "men at large", individual tastes don't count, as we're talking "status amongst other men" here), and she had a "slut reflex" of 6, his sexual status is 36/100.
Of course, there is usually a degree of resentment and jealousy from the lower scorers on the totum pole towards the higher scorers, and scorn from the higher towards the lower... but that's only natural. The same thing happens in the female status hierarchy as well. And pretty much any hierarchy anywhere, for that matter.
2) Most men know that the single best way to be attractive to an attractive person is to be known as attractive to other people who's opinion they value. Human beings are social creatures, and 95% of us are followers. Meaning we take our daily cues of what is acceptable and not... what is desireable and not... from other people around us. Odds are, if the people we look up to or see as equals find someone attractive, so will we.
Ever wonder why women love music stars? That's why. Everyone else wants them.
Ever wonder why women love movie stars? That's why. Everyone else wants them.
Ever wonder why some guys have pictures of them with 3 or 4 other women in their profiles? That's why. They want to show that everyone else wants them. (Note to guys: Pictures are contrived, so they don't work. If she physically sees women dripping off of you in person... that's a different story, though.)
Ever wonder why guys want reputations as guys who've slept with a lot of women? That's why. Everyone else wants them.
(Although having a reputation as a guy that hits on a lot of women and fails is grim death. If you can't get anyone else, she's not likely to want to be seen "lowering" herself.)
Of course this can work to turn-off women (and men) of lower attractiveness or self-esteem, who look at the competition for the man's (or woman's) time and attention, and may determine that she/he just isn't able to compete.
When you see the 5' 6" 200 lb. woman say that she doesn't find Brad Pitt attractive, that's likely why. She knows she can't compete, and would never be able to get him.
When you see the 35 year-old chess virgin chess-club-president claim he doesn't think Jessica Alba is sexy, that's likely why. He knows he can't compete, and would never be able to get her.
Of course, these are the extreme examples... and these are unconsicous behaviours...
But we all do this to one degree or another. Myself included. | |
|
| |
| |
svj
|
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 108 | |
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 3:27:42 PM | ^^^^ Don't take this the wrong way... but if your mates are giving you hell for meeting women... odds are you're meeting girls waaay above the standard they do (if they meet any at all), or waaay below.
Of course, there is usually a degree of resentment and jealousy from the lower scorers on the totum pole towards the higher scorers, and scorn from the higher towards the lower... but that's only natural. The same thing happens in the female status hierarchy as well. And pretty much any hierarchy anywhere, for that matter.
I wouldn't suggest going on the pull with your mates, in that case... they'll only hinder you. | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 3:50:30 PM | Yeah this is BS.
If guys sleep around we get a pat on the back whereas girls get called sluts. Guys... Don't you see? If we stopped mistreating women that like sex, then many of them would lose these guilty inhibitions, feel more sexually free... And then that would mean, MORE SEX!!!!
LOL.. Personally, I have no issue with women that are sexually uninhibited. Why some men think this is a problem is a strange kind of paradox. Because it's usually those men that complain that they ain't getting enough sex...
Yet another weird catch 22 paradox of Human sexuality.
As far as I'm concerned ladies... You can do what you like! Sex is meant to be fun and pleasurable after all. | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 3:59:17 PM | Because it is very difficult for a man to find a woman willing to sleep with him. It is an accomplishment.
Any woman can stand on the corner and not only get laid, but get paid money for it.
I have nothing against promiscuous women, but if she is indiscriminate, I may wonder.
I think there is a double standard here- a promiscuous gay man is hardly considered a stud... | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 4:53:00 PM | ^^^Really! What a infantile ramark to make. Bacteria's on 'washroom doors' live for a maximum of 48 hours..... And dont put you at risk of being infertile!!!
Fool.
im starting to think england is full of people with downs, and bad teeth. then again maybe its just staffordshire, england. honestly, you even spelt the town/city to live in wrong.
you can get certain strains of hepatitis from an ice cube. you honestly think you wont catch anything if you touch a door handle from a washroom?
life is dangerous, just shut the **** up and live it. | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 5:07:46 PM |
why is it that with a girl has a few 1 nighters she gets called a slut for sleeping around but when a guy does the say thing they get congratulated why cant girls get congratulated too, or guys get shun for it
I've noticed more that guys can or can't get the "male slut" term attached to them depending on who is doing the critique.
So a guy nails 100 women. Maybe in the locker room he'll be seen as a super stud...I can also see some women thinking the same, but mostly if they judge a guy as a real man if he can get his number up. Like he's got skill and sex appeal because 100 women slept with him.
However, I've also noticed the more intelligent, educated, and especially relationship and marriage minded women will look down on the "male slut". Mostly because they'll see his high number either as childish, or that he is anti-commitment, or worse he could be carrying around STDs.
Whenever I see the "ladies men" or even "playas" (there is a difference between the two), the women who tend to sleep with them often are of low self-esteem and many hope they can tame this guy into a relationship, when he might or might not make it clear that he just wants sex.
As for women, the "slut" remark unfortunately gets lumped on by both genders. By men who want to demean her out of ego...and by women who envy or hate how men give her attention. | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 5:34:20 PM | only the guy who didn't get laid and other jelous girls are calling her slut and who's congradulating the guy? When I was younger and more shall we say active I found that the boys who bullshitted had each other for company but buddy actually doing a few a week led a rather isolated life.
A confusion between urban ledgend and reality | |
|
Beedo
|
Joined: 1/6/2008
Msg: 114 | |
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/9/2008 10:17:40 PM | I'm starting to think slut is a Good word as well,
Thank You wonderful guys for helping me to see
the light, in the correct context yea.." I'm a slut I'm a slut"
And OOOhhh feels soo Good!!! | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/10/2008 3:50:39 AM | OptimismV'sRealism...
"im starting to think england is full of people with downs, and bad teeth. then again maybe its just staffordshire, england"
^^^ Using the condition Downs syndrome to insult someone is way below the belt. I'd be embarrassed and ashamed of myself if I'd of typed that.
Comments like that are ammunition to be reported. Be careful x
"life is dangerous, just shut the **** up and live it"
Really nice way you have of giving advice there.
Going back to the thread...
"Slut" actually means ' a slovenly or promiscuous woman'....
It doesn't actually mean ' a term used by other women who are having less fun and are jealous'..... - again another silly remark. | |
|
svj
|
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 116 | |
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/10/2008 7:28:04 AM | ^^^ And the word "b*tch" actually means "female dog".
But that is almost never the meaning that a person has when using it.
Assuming that a person's meaning is the literal meaning of the words they use is rather silly, don't you think?
In that spirit, I would highly doubt Opvs.Real actually thinks everyone from your country has Down's and bad teeth. It was a remark designed to create a negative feeling and reaction in someone that has been rather condescending to those who have been posting different viewpoints... and may I say, it worked very well.
You see, condescention has a way of bringing out negative reactions in people.
But you're young. In time, you'll acquire more wisdom, and gain a better understanding of how human interaction works.
See? Now that I've been condescending to you, you're not very likely to have positive feelings towards me now, are you? In fact, I've virtually gauranteed a negative, snarky, knee-jerk insulting response.
Feel free. Confirm what I've said for everyone.
Unless you decide to break the chain of continually egging everyone (and now me) on, and decide it is not the most productive use of your time....
Nor is it mine. But at least I've enjoyed myself, and who knows... maybe someone will have learned something, even if it isn't you.
Bye!  | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/10/2008 10:52:51 AM | to msg 115 I have noticed this to be true to a point
I have been called a male slut by female friends of mine thats more due to the fact that I have tended to sleep with them and then thier friends when they tell their friends about me.
I have been given good advice before never turn down something good you never know if you gonna be dead tommorow and never do what was good again.
Also bars are horrible places to pick up women I have found the bus or train works the best. People are bored and looking for something to make them laugh | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/10/2008 12:07:03 PM | I can't speak for everyone,but here's my opinion.
Consider what a guy has to do to attract a woman,he has to show her he is a better choice than any of the others.If he does mannage to impress her,he has shown he's got something the others din't.To other guys,thats an accomplishment,because other men know how difficult it is to prove yourself to a women your attracted to.
As for women being called sluts,(I don't say this to offend,only to offer my opinion.)
What do women have to go throu to attract a man?Usually the guy approches her.
So women who have lots a men are thought of as being greedy,she can pick and choose which ever guy she thinks is the best.
Men are excpected to take initiative in mating,so for a guy having lots of women's phone nummbers and pictures,other guys would hail him a hero!"whats your secret man?!!"
But for a woman to say she just had sex for the third time this week,"wow that must have been hard for her,she had to selsct from all the guys who approched her". | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/11/2008 6:27:29 AM | "And the word "b*tch" actually means "female dog"
^^^your forgetting the others too - like fox and otter x
anyway, well done 
and do we know the other definiton?
It is a woman who is considered to be malicious, manipulative or unpleasant!
"See? Now that I've been condescending to you, you're not very likely to have positive feelings towards me now, are you? In fact, I've virtually gauranteed a negative, snarky, knee-jerk insulting response"
Mmmm not particularly no. You see SVJ, I find it much more productive to 'correct' people rather than spend valuable time insulting them.
"Unless you decide to break the chain of continually egging everyone (and now me) on, and decide it is not the most productive use of your time....Nor is it mine.
But at least I've enjoyed myself"
^^^^^ Enjoyed yourself?
I think you maybe in need of a life my friend x | |
|
svj
|
Joined: 9/15/2007
Msg: 120 | |
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/11/2008 8:18:22 AM | ^^^
I think you maybe in need of a life my friend x
...and there you have it.
Although she was trying really hard not to take a swipe and demonstrate that she can't be maneuvered in such a fashion, she just couldn't help herself. Try as she might, she had to do it.
Bona Dea: I don't blame you for taking said swipe, I didn't give you much of an option.
For what it's worth... I didn't actually mean anything that I've said towards you... I was just using your remarks to illustrate an interesting phenomenon of human psychology, and try to introduce a positive spin to this thread. (that will become apparent shortly)
In truth, I've read though some of your post history, and view you to be a kind, caring person, with her head screwed on pretty straight. Please accept my apologies.
Anyways, back to the phenomenon.
The moral of the story?
We all have buttons, and we're all pushing them on each other (and ourselves) all the time. Usually pretty randomly, and unintentionally. One moment we're pushing a positive button, the next a negative one. Like flipping a coin. Up, down, down, up, up, up, down, up, down, down, up, down, down, down, up, down. Except our soceity is geared towards more negative reactions. Some situations lend themselves to negative feelings and outcomes. Commuting. News. The DMV. This thread.
Just remember... The response that immediately follows your action is a reaction. Do not take it personally. If they give you a negative response to something you said or did... remember their actions towards you were mainly determined by the stimulus you gave them to work with. It's not necessarily their fault. It could very well be yours. (Or mine, in the example above.)
Thought of in this context, that gives you all the power in your interactions with other people. You can control the mood of the interaction, because the other person doesn't know that they can. You can literally be that person that "lights up the room".
Obviously, thinking of people as computers to be programmed is not the way you should go about your daily life. Luckily, we don't have to.
If we learn which buttons are which, and then how to naturally, unconsciously, press the positive ones more often than the negative ones... (nothing is 100%... even a 60/40 split to the positive can work wonders) they will be more positive towards us. Make a laugh, get a laugh. Make a caring gesture, get more caring gestures. Our daily interactions with people become much more pleasant and happy. And humans are social creatures. The happier the people are when you're around, odds are the happier you'll be.
Once you start doing it inside your own head... ("I'm pretty sure I can do that! And if I can't, I'm pretty sure I can learn how!!") ...the world is your oyster. Opportunities for health, wealth, and love start to appear all over the place!
Anyways... back to work! | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/14/2008 1:09:57 AM | ^^^Anyways... back to work!
^^ Good god man, what do you do for a living to be able to give a Maslow style lecture the length of your're arm? lol
anyway - Here endeth the thread! | |
|
| |
| |
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/14/2008 11:43:59 AM | This goes to how we're wired.
Men are wired to mount and breed with females they're attracted to. Sometimes a nice butt or breasts would be all it takes.
Women are wired to look for a suitable male to breed with. Is he attractive physically? Can he provide a proper nest for me and our babies if not a great one? Is he going to leave me once he breeds me or will he be a good provider and stay?
I know this sounds simplistic, but we're very primal on this level and it also answers your question. Men get congradulated because they accomplished what men set out to. I saw...I wanted...I conquered.
Women get chastised for the same behaviour because they didn't go beyond the first step of what a woman SHOULD do when selecting a mating partner.
Our task as males is to convince you females we're going to fill YOUR requirments to accompish ours. Which also answers the age old question "I wonder why he never called me again after he spent the weekend with me?" | |
|
| gals are call sluts and guys get congratulated
Posted: 1/30/2008 2:40:37 AM | Men are typically congratulated for having a large amount of sexual partners for two reasons, as I understand it:
1) For the majority of men, getting laid is hard work. Other men appreciate this, and give status to other men accordingly.
The difficulty, and thus the status gains amongst other men, is in direct proportion to two factors:
a) The attractiveness of the woman he gets (ie. the level of competition he has to overcome to be the most attractive suitor in her eyes
========================================
Youve got a point there SVJ
The bottom line is that the happily married man is getting more sex, and often hotter sex than even the most cussessful "stud"..
And yet his sexual activites are largely ignored round the bar braggarts. Makes sense because he dont' have to put in the hardyards to get laid. | |
|
|
| Page 5 of 6
|
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 |
|
Home
login 
