| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 1:02:16 PM | | Believe it or not, YOU are one of the lucky ones--you at least get some closure, knowing exactly why she was dumping you. It sucks, still, I know. I think it's easier to dump someone on email because in person you might get the teary-eyed begging or whatever, and it's hard to stay strong because you DO still care for that person. I agree it's cowardly, and I would hope she would speak to you if you called. However, I don't think she will change her mind. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 1:12:15 PM |
This is no insult aimed at you directly.... but don't you think it's awfully fast for you to be over your "loved one" and moving on to your next experience?
What is he supposed to do? Sit around and cry about it for a month? Maybe beg for her to come back? The relationship is over, and he's moving on. It's obvious the OP is still healing up emotionally, and that's why he started the thread. He's doing the right thing in every respect. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 2:08:11 PM | She was saying she couldn't take care of herself while being in a relationship with you and you are angry she left? Love means you are supportive of someone being who they want to be. Your profile paints the picture of an overweight guy who doesn't cut his hair or dress well that gets low paying low skilled jobs and who drifts through life. You say you didn't do anything to deserve her leaving? Doesn't sound like you did anything to deserve her staying either. That the relationship made you happy is almost irrelevant. What you need to be concerned with is whether your partner is happy.
I have agood job my own House I do dress well better than you PUNK. I may be overwieght but I was more than suportive of her. You do not know me but I think you are a punk! | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 3:43:07 PM | SPit fire... no I dont suggest he sit around and cry.. but are you going to suggest that going out and getting laid after his "heart was broken" is the best plan?
Amigood4u. prey tell.... where did I attack? | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 4:13:51 PM | I think going out and having fun immediately is a healthy response to this kind of disappointment. He's getting back out there and keeping it fun--allowing himself time to fully get over the old relationship. That's EXACTLY what you should do.
I ask you again.....is he supposed to sit around and think about the dead relationship? What's the point? The OP is doing what any normal, healthy dude does in this situation. You have fun and sow a few wild oats before going back to long-term mode and looking for a new relationship. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 4:23:14 PM | what's the big deal, you met on line, you can break up on line. sometimes people just don't have the courage to hurt you in person. Accept and move...she doesn't sound like at 35 she is wrapped too tight...consider that she probably did you a favor.
good luck! | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 4:43:43 PM | she seemed honest and up front , including her flaws . i;d say you lost a honest gal . besides you met on the net why not end the same way .
to bad you aired a private convercation in public , no class . know what i mean | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:17:00 PM | The topic is being dumped by email. In the old days when friends hooked us up on "blind dates" it was necessary for both to be curteous, because the friends would hear of rude behavior and disapprove. Today, the annominity of the internet allows you to be rude, crude and crass and escape any repercussions. Meet by internet, break up by internet, you don't even know my real name.
In answer to your question: "Where did I attack?" I'll paraphrase your message #9:
'It never fails ....that men jump back on the market after being in love....'
and then 'This is not an insult aimed at you directly....but at all men just like you. '
Coupled with ignoring the topic all together, that is an attack. Your entitled to your opinion, I know you have one, and I believe you have the right to voice it. You did not disapprove of her method, but insulted his reaction to it.
But you don't comprehend the last line of the post: ' I'm back on the market but I can't do long term relationship again.' [ Again paraphrased] The man is saying the method chosen took a piece of his heart that is now forever gone. That is the insult here, that he was treated so impersonally it has affected his future. Will he recover and open himself open completely to another woman? We don't know. We pray he will.
Feel free to post your own topic "How quickly men sleep around after we dump them" but you didn't contribute to the topic at hand. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:28:36 PM | is your name AMIGOOD or AMIGOD?
Its' amazing how you took my printed words and changed them to suit your own lil pathetic way of looking at things......
Please IF you are going to RE quote someone..... REQUOTE the actual sentence which was....
This is no insult aimed at you directly.... but don't you think it's awfully fast for you to be over your "loved one" and moving on to your next experience?
NOT your distorted version.....
ALSO.. lets remember that this man chose to take a PRIVATE email and post it for the world to see.... now you tell me what is the purpose of that if not to just look for sympathy? In my opinion any "man" that will post a private letter doesn't deserve sympathy.
Ty... jj | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:33:57 PM | Dude, at least she let you know she wanted out and gave an explanation. Sure it was easier on her to do it that way, but remember, as Simon and Garfunkel said, "There must be 50 ways to leave your lover".
Move on and don't whine about it. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:43:42 PM | This JUST happened to me a few days ago , and I am still stunned by it!!! It IS a very cowardly way to to it . A phone call would at least be the decent thing to do, but with email, you can't even ask what happened. It is totally one sided. H refuses to take my calls or even read my follow up emails. He is a total coward!!!
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:45:47 PM | Once again... you attack his manhood for wanting sympathy. YES, that's exactly why he shared this personal story. It's no surprise he won't get any sympathy from you.
Just say "My sista was wrong. No matter how fat, how hairy, how poorly dressed or weak financially he may be, she was wrong to love him dearly, encourage his love in return, and then dump him by remote control" Just say that. Don't mention all men, don't say "any man", say it to this man, to his face, in front of these witnesses.
But you can't. I am not god, but I am goodforyou because I have the balls to tell you your opinion sucks. You are as cold and uncaring as she was. Forward these forums to your boyfriend, if you have one, so that he knows what to expect from you. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:48:37 PM | you're nuts. :) Go back, open your eyes, close your"mouth, and RE read the post.... it was asked DIRECTLY to him. Which btw he answered with more clarity then your rambling posts. You have some deep seeded personal issues that you need to address... perhaps paranoia being one of them
AND if my boyfriend ever posted my private letters to him, he would have to worry about his nuts.....
ciao darlin... have fun on fantasy land, im done responding to your irratic ramblings. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:50:33 PM | | well I wish mine had did mine over the internet I think. Instead he gave me a kiss good bye and said ... I'll see you this evening and walked out the door and put a note in my car telling me to move out. How can men just be so cold hearted and not care, then move some one in or be out with some one again in a few days. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 6:58:09 PM |
ALSO.. lets remember that this man chose to take a PRIVATE email and post it for the world to see.... now you tell me what is the purpose of that if not to just look for sympathy? In my opinion any "man" that will post a private letter doesn't deserve sympathy.
Ty... jj
This was an excerpt and I also obmitted the names. To be faitrr this is a person I met not on the net but at a concert I was playing.
I am not looking for sympathy but sharing my side of the story. I bought her books for school, took care of her cats and fed them. I suported her 100%. Why should I suport her now that she has decided to break up with no provication. There was none of the "tale tell factors" like "im unhappy" or "we need a break" or lets just be "FRIENDS WITH BENIFETS" None of the tale tell signs things were wrong. Up until christmas her mom actully liked me. (Her mom stopped liking me all because I used her computer to check email...pretty paranoid..and I got permission form my ex to do so.What a Gyp) The thing is after christmas things changed a bit but nothing to seem to think I could be dumped. I was happy, she was happy the past month or so so ..No I did not expect this at all. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 7:04:32 PM | I understand WHY you posted the private lette. Because you're hurt and in pain, but in all fairness, like you stated yourself.. it is just YOUR SIDE. We dont have the benefit of really knowing what is going on, on her side, other then what you typed... so yes it came off as a sympathy thread...
Nortatem...listen Im sorry that had to happen to you. Im sorry that you were hurt, betrayed, and heartbroken. Does it suck for you? YES? Is it the best idea for you to run off and run from woman to woman just for sex? NO. I dont think, that inspite of thats how you feel right now, that, that is going to make you happy. I just think that before you jump into another saddle that you should take time to be by yourself, digest what has happened being its sooo fresh and try to learn from your mistakes in this last relationship. MAYBE you gave tooo much. Maybe she was a taker.. who knows. Just don't jump into some nameless faceless sex frenzy and in the end still feel empty.. thats all im saying.
I wish you luck.
I | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 7:06:53 PM | Oh, you called me darlin!!!! Be still my heart!!!! If you can't address the issue, or respond to the point, then at least you can demean me, and all men too.
I hope your boyfriend berakes up with you by email, and protects his nuts.
I 'm enjoying the fantasy where men and women treat each other with mutual respect. What planet are you from?
Good night and sweet dreams my love. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 7:07:24 PM |
she seemed honest and up front , including her flaws . i;d say you lost a honest gal . besides you met on the net why not end the same way .
to bad you aired a private convercation in public , no class . know what i mean
Yes she was honest and wonderful. I would have liked to be by her side for Life. I Showed plenty of class I left out some of the other more private stuff, and I posted no names. I showed more class than she did. Being with her for as long as I was and taking her back once after a break up, I feel I deserve the respect of an Eye to eye break up.
As for me looking unkempt. I love my long hair and it is better than most women, I am a metla musician and a bohemian. I am not my hair or my job. This had nothing to do with the break up nor would I want someone who would make me or only want me clean shaven. My ex loved my hair and would not let me cut it. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 7:24:03 PM | | I can kinda relate...I was dating this man , and just out of the blue he never calls me again , says that he was going to home hardware to have a key cut and he would call me when he got back , well that was saturday and I have yet to hear from him , ive called him left messages and text messages to No avail..I dont get why ppl cant be adults and say "Im sorry I dont think this is going to work " or "Im not interested" Makes no sence to me , but alot of things ppl do doesnt make any sence to me , whatever live and learn I guess.... | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 7:28:33 PM |
Is it the best idea for you to run off and run from woman to woman just for sex? NO
I didn't see the OP asking for any advice on that aspect of what he's doing. The fact is, It's healthy for him to have a little fun now to help him heal from this relationship. If that, for him, means going "from woman to woman", then so be it. He's moving on and dealing with it, and that's all that matters.
As for the email, I think the girlfriend could have done that a little better, but that's her business. Face-to-face is better, but I don't really have a problem with what she did. The important thing is that the relationship is over, and the OP is taking the steps to move on. How he does that it up to him and not posters on a website. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 7:33:44 PM | | Seem's like you have spent most of your life living for everyone but you...( your parent's ). There's a love that enables you to grow and a love that stunts your growth and that is exactly were you are right now. You obviously recognize what you need to do so do it. Don't talk about it, be about it! Start thinking for yourself or later on in life you will find yourself by yourself because this one or that one didn't approve of the person your seeing. Life is like a circle, be careful that you do and give exactly what you want to come back to you. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 7:38:38 PM | | Hey dude I really feel for you......... But don't worry she did you a favor !!! Besides the fact of her seeking every ones approval , she does'nt care enough to break up with you face to face. Let her be someone else's problem and move on. | |
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| Broken up via Email: How cowardly!
Posted: 1/7/2008 8:19:32 PM | BEAR WITNESS: GENTLEMEN
We have just witnessed the GREAT THAW. Hark the Herald Angels sing!
"Call me JJ" has stated that she is sorry. See her message number 68.
She says she knows that it sucks. She says she is sorry that it hurts.
Without saying so verbatim, she has said the woman was cruel.
Welcome back to the human race, Call me JJ!
Call me JJ takes a difference of opinion, which is her right, and offers advice.
Without attacking anyone's manhood, she has offered her opinion on the matter at hand finally.
Let's take this transformation as an omen that there may be hope for your ex-girlfriend as well. | |
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