| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/5/2008 7:27:59 PM | The problem with todays dating scene is everyone is always looking for the BBD.
You ask..what is that. Well, The BIGGER BETTER DEAL.
Nobody wants to commit because they think there is always a bigger better deal somewhere down the road.
The real sad thing is that many never outgrow this game.
That is why I prefer a woman that is self sufficient, well established, finanacially secure, one that doesnt need a man but wants to meet someone to share her life with, so that when she decides to pick someone you know its for the right reasons and won't be looking over my shoulder at what might be better down the line.
Now the ladies are saying ..HEY......what about the guys! ! ! !
...Yes, you are right. Many men won't commit cause the dumb ones are always looking for the hotter , the one with the better body, the younger and other superficial BS reasons.
Meanwhile, passing over some great catches. | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/5/2008 7:31:44 PM |
wowsad wrote: If you are told that your partner doesn't
want to be exclusive, then you're not only risking your sanity,
you're also risking your health. These days, not being exclusive
is getting more dangerous every day. I wouldn't sleep with a
chick that was sleeping around, too many people out there
have stds.
It's a common myth that having your partners one at a time
somehow reduces your risk of STDs compared to having them
simultaneously. Risk is directly proportional to number of partners
(all other things equal) so statistically it's no safer to have them serially
than concurrently. | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/5/2008 8:05:23 PM |
It's a common myth that having your partners one at a time somehow reduces your risk of STDs compared to having them simultaneously. Risk is directly proportional to number of partners (all other things equal) so statistically it's no safer to have them serially than concurrently.
But.... the numbers rack up a lot faster if they're having multiple partners in one time frame as opposed to serial. Another problem is many do go get tested before going into that exclusive stage, how do you know they will remain clean if they're still sleeping with other people?
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/6/2008 4:32:11 AM | Differant levels of girlfriends? Thats BS "non commital" terminology.
Ok.maybe its just me, but I won't call someone my girlfriend unless we are being exclusive.
Friends = platonic, in case you dont know what that means, NO sex!
Friends with benefits = non commited fk buddy that you do other activities with.
Girlfriend = exclusive, commited
Fiancee = making plans to marry or living together and want to make it sound more "socially acceptable" (exclusive)
Wife = duh , we all know that!..You are married! Oh yea , you suppose to be exclusive here also! ! !
Again, this is just my opinion. What do you all think? | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/6/2008 4:48:09 AM |
Wife = duh , we all know that!..You are married! Oh yea , you suppose to be exclusive here also! ! !
Somehow I don't think that everyone does know that one. The last two people that officialy asked me out turned out to be married. Lets just hope that this next batch of guys I'm going out with do understand what that word means. | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/6/2008 4:50:01 AM | florapost on 2/6/2008 7:35:22 AM
We earn exclusivity
You are correct and NOT until then, should you call that person your girlfriend or boyfriend.
If someone during a conversation asks you " hey, how are you and your girlfriend/boyfriend doing, you answer shouldnt be , "which one"? | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/6/2008 10:23:51 AM | Ok...I will try break it down.
I use the term "girlfriend/ boyfriend" because it depend if you are a guy or a woman, this is addressing both genders.
If you call someone your GF or BF ( depending if you a girl or a guy, get it?), You should only have ONE girlfriend ( if you a guy) or ONE boyfriend ( if you a girl), so if someone asks you" hey, how are you and your girlfriend/boyfriend doing" you shouldnt answer which one, meaning you should only have 1 girlfriend (if you are a guy) or only 1 boyfriend (if you are a girl).
I am not at this point even gonna address alternate lifestyles. I hope this cleared it up for those that didnt understand.
If you now have this understood, then refer back (scroll up) to my post about the differance between a girlfriend (boyfriend if you are a woman), exclusivity and commitment goes with that, and a Friend or "Friend with benefits". If you are not ready to commit and be exclusive then dont call her you girlfriend.
If you a woman and you accept being called someone's girlfriend yet he isnt exclusive to you, then you really need to re-evaluate yourself. | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/6/2008 7:34:13 PM | I always make sure a prospective bf knows that I am monogamous and expect the same from my partner before the situation presents itself. That gives him the opportunity to look elsewhere if he preferes to "keep his options open".
I don't assume he'll consider us exclusive if we sleep together just because I will. Verbal conformation before hand is a must for me.
I don't refer to a man as "my boyfriend" unless we are exclusive. Prior to that time he's a guy I'm dating. "I'm going out Friday with So and so", "That sounds fun, I'll see if So and so would like to go as well"...Not "My boyfriend and I...", I'll see if my boyfriend wants to go too"...
I guess that means he moves up the ladder from a verb to a noun if we progress to the bedroom?
lol Wow that sounds so wrong! hahaha | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/6/2008 8:29:28 PM | | I would say if you are "b/f and g/f", you should be exclusive, but monogamy seems to be a lost art form these days....you also have to look at what OP have chosen on here as their interests.....if they say "dating" you know your not gonna be the only one...if they say "long term" or "relationship" then you probably have a better chance of finding someone who wants a monogamous relationship. | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 2/7/2008 8:21:01 PM |
painterpaul wrote: I am trying to make a metaphorical
impression that I can take care of your needs. So even a
modest dinner with a drink and two is gonna run $50 or so.
Throw in a few flowers, and it doesn't take alot of chasing
to spend 150 -200 per month chasing a woman.
In my social circle, I've noticed that some men's company is so
enjoyable, they don't have to pay women to spend time with them.
Most of them are openly dating multiple women, and some of them
go out in groups (i.e. one man with 2 or 3 women at a time). | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 3/4/2008 2:42:47 PM | This must be something pretty new. I am back into the dating scene recently and I am 43. I would think there has to be alot of open communication between the man and woman who are seeing each other- you also of course need a high level of trust. I for one believe being exclusive means it is just you TWO and no one else and you plan to build on the relationship to hopefully lead to either marriage or long-term.....
I do not believe u can love more than one person at once anyways and how would the implications be in the sex dept for the MAN if he has 3 woman on the go- dont think that could work out!! | |
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| So these days being boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean being exclusive??
Posted: 3/4/2008 2:43:40 PM | This must be something pretty new. I am back into the dating scene recently and I am 43. I would think there has to be alot of open communication between the man and woman who are seeing each other- you also of course need a high level of trust. I for one believe being exclusive means it is just you TWO and no one else and you plan to build on the relationship to hopefully lead to either marriage or long-term.....
I do not believe u can love more than one person at once anyways and how would the implications be in the sex dept for the MAN if he has 3 woman on the go- dont think that could work out!! | |
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