| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/13/2008 9:16:52 PM |
Not to say you can't be a rebel and defy the system in the pursuit of personal happiness as well as standing up for what is right. There is no reason why we cannot have both. On one hand it is good to have standards. On the other it is bad when people try to use the same to secure power over others thru guilt and shaming.
Keep in mind that the guilt and shaming goes both ways. When I was younger and my viewpoints a bit different I found I was shamed for being a "bad girl" (it was the seventies after all) and now that the world and my perspectives have changed, I find that I am shamed by the men who want to date me for being a "good girl."
What's so very wrong with wanting develop a relationship? Or rather, in this pond 'o' life how do you determine who's got them 'ol fashioned values?
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 1:56:42 AM | | I agree with posts 5 and 6. "Old fashioned values" were mostly lip service or rhetoric, because what is now acceptable behavior was then a taboo that was practiced but almost never admitted (hush, hush). Add to that all those arranged marriages of the past and what people call OFVs were not much more than a myth. There is History and then there are Myths. Equally, it is a myth that people (or men) these days are into first date or one night stand sex. | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 8:58:20 AM |
when we were younger we were taught that we should have morrals.why now years down the line, that they dont even count no more.theres to many diseases around and some NOT all people think sex is a number one thing.me personally, it should stay special between two people.
When,exactly was this "magical time" when things were better?
I'm 41 and I can remember some good things from my youth......some not so good...and a lot of bad things.
Despite some of the things that are going on today,it's likely that things today are as good,if not better than in times past.
Better healthcare,better working conditions (in some areas),information is more easily available,etc.Much better than when I was a kid.
I think nostalgia is a trap that people fall into when they look for answers that may not exist. | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 9:50:02 AM | | Im suffering from this at the moment, ive only been here a few days and make it clear im not into adult fun and one night stands etc but still get all that crap from fellas on here... dont get me wrong im not anti men or frigid, i love sex but within a relationship, not with three different men in a week.. eh im happy to be old fashioned in that case :0) | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 12:30:37 PM | | I guess some of us are saying that it is anybody's right to have "conservative" values re sex, dating, rels, etc but calling them "old fashioned" is not a historically accurate label. | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 12:34:53 PM | | Richard Millhouse Nixon, Ronald Reagan, Slick Willy and The Busharinos have hijacked them, pulled the wool over conservatives' eyes, and summarily mocked and taunted each value and standard with the fool-the-masses skill of the Machiavellian sociopaths that they are. | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 12:57:47 PM | | I know what values your talking about because it was perched to me as a child. But I don't agree with it. All this world is based on is sex basically. Sex is a must for a relationship or even chemistry to devolope for me anyway. Keep hope there is some who still have these values. | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 1:18:28 PM | ^^^
Well gee...let's go a little further than the feminist era shall we?
Perhaps one could simply sit down and read the old testament and see what kind of "old fashioned values" are in there...
I suspect that "that" book is considered an authority of "some sort" on good ol' fashioned values and morals...but then again, it IS hard to tell amongst all the murders, acts of genocide, rapes and incest stories...so I "could" be wrong.
*Just my opinion*
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 5:20:43 PM | i feel the same way. i think the morals ran off with the manners and they are holding hands somewhere in bali having a beer on the beach. i truly hope they come back soon because it really sucks having to deal with rude dishonest people sometimes. but the thing is, it just inspires me to try to be a better person. if we all made an effort to bring back morals and stop cursing loudly in public, well... i think we'd all be much happier!
lara | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 5:32:17 PM | I look at our leadership in this country and if they can lie and deceive so many people, sending our young adults to die in a useless war, supporting corporations over citizens and social responsibilities, I can completely understand why we have lost sight of values.
Piaget's book on the developmental stages of children explains quite a bit about this topic. Many folks just cannot mature to the point of valuing a mutually exclusive and honest, trusting relationship. We have become a society of me, me, me, and instant gratification.
I agree, the media, especially the internet, has made it easy to lose sight of ethical and moral behaviors. When we begin to question why we are here and what our lives will mean in the end, I think that is the beginning of finding true happiness and peace.
I'm workin' on it, are you??? | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 5:57:06 PM | Not picking on you Babs... your post was just a great leaping off point....
our leadership in this country and if they can lie and deceive so many people
Historically, it was there, just not discussed... think JFK for starters... his affairs would have kept him from office. The media, for all their faults, have a sub-industry of keeping us informed of politicians' transgressions. Who voted them in? Who can't be bothered to go vote? Any of them the same people moaning about society going to hell in a hand basket?
sending our young adults to die in a useless war
... we have always sent our young adults to die in useless wars...
We have become a society of me, me, me, and instant gratification.
This I can "get'. This has always gone in phases as well... it was one of the criticisms of the roaring 20's
the media, especially the internet, has made it easy to lose sight of ethical and moral behaviors.
The internet is passive - you must look it up. It has good and bad on it. Your choice - choose wisely.
The media - thinking entertainment media here - reflects society more than it develops trends.
People nostalgic for "the good old days" aren't looking at the reality of those days IMO. Sure, there are problems today... there have been problems at every point in history. So, what are you doing about it? | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 6:53:16 PM | I agree with most of the points in post 92.
The good ole times are due to our bad or a best selective memory!
In general, specifically re rels and in particular re commitment (what an overused, misused and abused term and notion!!!!)
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 7:02:35 PM |
where have the old fashioned values gone
They put on their miniskirts, bought some condoms, and hit the bars!
They are still sleeping it off....had a great time tho!
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 7:31:40 PM |
Perhaps one could simply sit down and read the old testament and see what kind of "old fashioned values" are in there...
I suspect that "that" book is considered an authority of "some sort" on good ol' fashioned values and morals...but then again, it IS hard to tell amongst all the murders, acts of genocide, rapes and incest stories...so I "could" be wrong.
The bible stories are full of sex...large parts of the texts have been "edited" for our viewing pleasure. | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/14/2008 7:55:07 PM | "Old fashioned values"?
In Victorian England, there were more whorehouses in London than there were at any other time in history, including today.
The Medieval morality play "Hickscorner" bemoans the fact that so many "stews" (prostitutes) were on the streets of London that "decent" people had to beware when they went out at night.
I just read a report that confirms syphilis was brought from the Americas to Europe by Columbus' sailors. Famous people who died from this disease: King Henry VIII, Napoleon, John Keats, Vincent Van Gogh and Al Capone, Lenin, Edward VI, Winston Churchill's father, Schubert, Isabella Beeton, Ivan the Terrible, Martin Alonzo Pinzon, Toulouse Lautrec, Manet . . . and the list goes on. How many unfamous people died of syphilis?
For centuries, men had mistresses and society looked the other way because it was socially acceptable for men to sleep around.
There were NO good old days. People are people and the things that go on today have always gone on. People are just more verbal about such things. | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/16/2008 1:21:58 PM | I don't remember anyone saying anything about time traveling ... The OP choose the phrase "old fashioned values" as term for a more conservative moral code or ethics, but no where has anyone stated that they wish it was the year 1810 or whatever. There is no need for a history lesson here.
Is the sexually liberal viewpoint that everyone should do whatever they want whenever they want -- unless you happen to have a more conservative outlook? That doesn't sound very liberal or logical to me.
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/16/2008 1:42:34 PM | The good old fashioned values are here, right in front of you and they always have been. Sometimes it is easy for us to focus on the negative things that happen to us, to the unjustices, after all is it not through suffering that we are most easily awakened from our comfort zone? I am certain that each of you meet amazing, kind and generous people all the time and though you appreciate them they are not the one's that stand out.
If I may suggest, don't worry about the people who have lost their way or may not realize the impact their naive actions have on others. You don't know what kind of tribulations their life's vicissitudes have wrought on them and they, like many of us, do not know how to express themselves properly. So let them be responsible for their own happiness as you are responsible for your own... be resilient against the storms and shine regardless. After all, isn't the sun always shining on the inside? | |
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| where have the old fashioned values gone
Posted: 1/16/2008 2:44:07 PM |
" where have the old fashioned values gone "
Back to the "old-fashioned" imaginary pond where they came from.
Name one single point in human history (recent or otherwise) when there haven't been scads of depraved, immoral, twisted people making life miserable for others. Oh, yes-- and sexually promiscuous people, too (since that seems to be what most folks want to focus upon).
Not that there haven't been plenty of good people around as well... but that's not the point of the thread, is it?
Since "old fashioned values" seems to be equated to "conservative, religious values" by many who use the term seriously... all I can say is this:
Whatever happened to "thou shalt not kill"? | |
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