| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/15/2008 4:54:48 PM | just say your on the phone to there mum so could they call back later.
sorry they said message was short laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/15/2008 8:55:25 PM | This works
Ask them "can you please put this number on your do not call list please"
and they WILL STOP CALLING
Allmost all tellemarketers have this and are bound by a code of conduct to do so
and after a few times the calls stop
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/15/2008 10:07:58 PM | | I was visiting my dad once and the phone rang. He was going to ignore it because it was a telemarketer again. I picked up the phone and when they asked if my dad was there I told him he had died that morning. The telemarketer was upset and my dad was trying not to laugh. They never called again though. | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/16/2008 12:26:27 PM |
martyn_v8
... I actually had one finance company hold out for 13 minutes, an absolute record!! Anyone else had longer?
I once had to call a corporate call center (800)-number to get something straightened out. My first call was during the night and an automated reply told me they're only open until 9:00 pm. Next evening, I called at about twenty til nine and the automated voice told me, "Your call is important to us; please hold for the next customer servicing representative" over & over.
9:00 pm came and went and the voice was still saying, "Your call is important to us; please hold for the next customer servicing representative". So I went about my business and left the line open all night and into the morning.
I don't know whether they pay for (800)-number calls by the minute, but I'm hoping so. | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/16/2008 12:29:30 PM | Tom Mabe has one of the very best responses ever:
http://www.digyourowngrave.com/tom-mabe-telemarketer-crime-scene-prank/
http://tommabe.com/home.php | |
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nogo3
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Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 31 | |
| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/18/2008 8:30:02 AM | heres mine
hey hon, you have a nice sexy voice, lets do phone sex i'm horny, are you horny to, are you in a cubicle, take your panties off and play with your p ussy, i wanna hear you get off.
hey, the best part is it works lots of times, lmao
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/18/2008 9:36:19 PM | GREAT ONES LOL
my friend has a GREAT ONE TOO
he answers the phone and says "im sorry im busy, i'm the rental agent showing a client this house and need to go"
lol hahah
that way they never call back hahahah
too funny | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/18/2008 10:06:01 PM | Wow...what a list!!!!!!!!!!!!! Trades must be slow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
OR
Instruct them to put your number on there do not call list (D.N.C. list), and they stop calling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/20/2008 3:58:30 PM | my fav one to use... if you have the time.... let them go through everything they have to say.. ask a bunch of questions... then ask about billing ..sales .. guarantee's . and at the very last say that you are not interested... because they wasted your time, you wasted theirs.
( remember... most are paid on commission just think of all the people that will not get a call because you just were a real az hole )  thank you | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/20/2008 8:38:32 PM |
12. Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" Hang up.
when i saw the topic i instantly thought of this one! i think it was on 'everybody loves raymond.' it had me on the floor laughing. the rest are pretty funny! i need it at work because they're ALWAYS calling! | |
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olop
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Joined: 1/18/2008
Msg: 37 | |
| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/21/2008 11:25:47 PM | | As an ex telemarketer I use to laugh at alot of these but if you left me hanging on the line or wasting my time being that it was a commission based job, I would write down your number and after work around 10:30 pm a group of us would proceed to the local watering hole and after last call we would get our list of numbers and start the prank calls at 2:oo am waking everyone up that messed with us. That was back in the day of the good ole pay phone. So if you get a prank or alot of hang ups in the middle of the night just know it might be your friendly neighborhood telemarketer. | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/24/2008 6:58:46 PM | This is a little off topic since it has to do with bill collectors instead of telemarketers.
I was out of work and being plagued by this same man from the same company every single day!! I finally told him "You know, I had to go to the food pantry to feed my kids this month, they don't care much for veg-all, do you take payments in canned goods?" He never did call back LOL | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/24/2008 11:12:39 PM | lol i use to be a telemarketer for a who 2 weeks...
dont thing i got told were to go so many times in my life as i didn those 2 weeks... hahahahaha.. | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/25/2008 12:43:47 PM | I used to try to keep them on the line for half hour or so, ask all kinds of questions, then get into their personal life, just to tell them not interested in the end, I don' get many telemarketers call... and this was all long before the NCL.....
(if they ever do call back, I give them LadyDis phone no.......jk. lol) | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/26/2008 1:20:11 PM | So in a former life, I worked as a product rep for Johnson & Johnson Oral Health Products. It was my job to call dentist office and the like and try to market and sell whitening systems. My territory: WA and OR. Groovy....granola bars and starbucks. Right. So, I called this Vietnamise Dental office in Seattle a few times a month to try to get anyone on the phone to tell them about our wonderful products. Everytime I would call, the receptionist, who I nicknamed Sue because when I asked her what her name was, she rattled off random letters from the alphabet...tbvphqasdnlgnfh...anyways, she would constantly ask me "why are you calling?" I would start to explain and every time, she'd yell at me..."No Talk, Just Send Sample!" Then she would hang up on me. So about 6 months later, I call and she says to me: "You call here every monthy, what you want?" So I'd go into why and she would again cut me off and yell, "NO Talk, Just send Sample!" I'd laugh every time and it because my line for all telemarketers who call me. "NO Talk, just send sample!" Click!  | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/26/2008 3:02:06 PM | ** Yes, my name is Brad and I have a few questions for him.
**
That's one I like, I usually ask if it's the Police again, surely you've still got him in custody?? We've not seen him since he was arrested last week..... have you charged him yet?? did you manage to get the gun??
hehehehe....
I kept getting calls from a window/conservatory company offering a free quotation, in the end I let them send someone round, I met the guy in the car park, he asked where I would like the conservatory, I said outside my french doors.... that's MY flat... on the 2nd floor!!! how are you gonna fit it!!! his face was a picture!!! I can only imagine the sh*t that flew in that office when he got back!!
Or if it's a female.... "Do you fancy going on a dirty weekend away sometime"??
If they say it's not the way to speak to a woman.... well just remember lady.... YOU called me....this is MY phone....if you don't like MY attitude.....don't call ME again!!!
   Paul. | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/26/2008 6:28:42 PM | We have a "do not call" register in Australia, it does actually work, and has greatly reduced the number of telemarketing calls I get. Though now, I'm almost tempted to take myself off the list, just so I can use some of those responses!!
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/31/2008 8:20:13 AM | omg! sctrrdr, i will getcha fer that!
make a note to send him via snailmail the next fish i catch...puuuueeeeeeeeeewwww!
yanno its funny but now that i have all these great responses i havent had a telemarketer call me ...well, that one about my car warrenty expiring, and i dont even own a car ...grrrr...but he calls me at like 7am when i am not caffine-ated enough to do anything but politely drop the phone on the bed as i head towards the kitchen...leaving him talking to empty sheets..haha.......strange, really, cause by the time i return to talk to him, he's hung up on me.....hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 1/31/2008 4:43:27 PM | sometimes when I get the ones that do those 25 minute marketing survey calls
( and i hate those ) like what soap or toothpaste ya use or who does the shopping
I play along a few minutes, but slowly start walking outside farther and farther
away from my cordless phone's base, till the signal dies , lol :rolls: usually a couple
of hundred feet , | |
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| No, this doesn't work
Posted: 5/18/2008 5:50:34 PM |
This works
Ask them "can you please put this number on your do not call list please"
and they WILL STOP CALLING
Allmost all tellemarketers have this and are bound by a code of conduct to do so
and after a few times the calls stop
All telemarketers are REQUIRED to have do not call lists.
People are also required to go the speed limit on roads. But, believe it or not, people break the law and don't get caught, prosecuted or give a rat's patoot.
The do not call list does not work for at least a year.
side note: LMAO @ code of conduct
Yeah, being called three times a day by the same company on my cell phone about my mortgage(which at the time did not exist it was still in my parents' names, but they couldn't bring up any ACTUAL information anyway) for two weeks, SURE they have code of conduct! The FCC also takes all violations seriously.
Telemarketers still get by the state and national do not call lists once in a while, but luckily they're calling from information back in the 80s or due to my brother's death records which came back to the house. So, I get to have fun with them. My brother, father and grandfather have the same name.
When they ask to speak to a very poorly pronounced name similar to the name I ask, "You want the dead one, the one that's lived in Hawaii for the past ten years, or the one who's never lived at this number in all his 90 years?"
After the long pause or the, "Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh." They normally hang up. At least they try to flip through the screens to find the scripted answer to that question. lol | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 5/18/2008 7:14:27 PM | My mother told me about this one that she actually did once. I love telling this story.
She used to work at City Hall and would go home on her lunch break, and one particular day she was having a bad day at work and was looking forward to the rest at home during lunch hour. Of course, when she did get home she was bombarded with calls from telemarketers.
Finally, she said to one of them, "you know, it's a sad day when a woman can't even prepare for her husband's funeral without getting bothered by telemarketers!"
Click... | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 5/18/2008 8:27:22 PM | When my ex would get a telemarketer on the phone, she'd gesture to me (as if to say, "we got one"), then tilt the phone toward me slightly.
"Is that HIM?!" I'd yell. "Is that HIM?!?! G*D DAMMIT, I TOLD YOU THE NEXT TIME HE CALLED, I'D KILL YOU AND HIM!!"
"But... but..." she'd try to cut in.
"NO, I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO HIM - HE'LL SEE ME SOON ENOUGH!! IN FACT, I'M GOING OVER THERE RIGHT NOW!!"
By this time, either the TM is hanging up or apologizing, or my ex is saying, "This is really not such a good time..."
Then she'd hang up and we'd bust a gut. Cruel, but fair. | |
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| 20 responses to use with telemarketers
Posted: 5/18/2008 9:34:07 PM | It looks like I am a bad girl .. but......
I taped myself and a partner having sex a few times [he knew so we pulled out ALL the stops] and I left the recorder next to the phone, nuff said.
*I have also answered the phone purrrrrrrrrrrrrrred 'I was hoping youw ould call back tiger, now where we.. oh yes, you were telling me how you wanted to...' They hang up, lol.
*Answer the phone and keep going 'beep beep beep' over and over and over. Or if you have one of those old sound makers [the ones with 6 or 8 sounds] go through them, over and over.
*"I know who YOU are. You are one of THEM. I have my foil hat on, so you can't read my mind, I know you cant." Then rant and rave about their 'mind control' tactics.
*My fav, 'this better be important or YOU own me mindblowing orgasms.' They hang up. | |
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