| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 1/19/2009 12:08:25 PM | as seen on vh1
they had these two thumb with googley eyes and everything dressed up
Thumb 1 "what has one thumb and loves rock and roll?"
Thumb 2 points backwards "erm...this guy?"
Thumb 1 " no the drummer from def lepperd"
lol
that and i know im going to get a lot of shit for this one but--a comedian reinacted John Lennon's last song he ever wrote--
"what that you got in your hand? pow pow aghhh!"  | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 1/23/2009 9:44:55 PM | A man is walking his rotwieler. He passes a bar and decides to go in for a drink. He can't take the dog in the bar so he ties him up outside. A few min later a man comes in an asks whos rotwieler is that outside. The guy says its mine, why? the other guy says he's dead. the guy was distraut and asked "My dog is dead how did he die"? My dog killed him the other man said. The guy was bewildered. My dog has never lost a fight what kind of dog do you have? the guy said a cha hua hua. Ok How did your chahuahua kill my dog? the guy says.
He choked to death! | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 1/28/2009 6:28:55 PM | I always laugh at this one, but others just blink when I tell it.
Why does the light go out when you close the refrigerator door?
Give up?
Because the mayonnaise is dressing!!
Come on... that's funny, I don't care who you are.  | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 1/28/2009 10:01:18 PM | I still appreciate "guy" humor when most of my female friends think it's "gross" or "stupid". That's why I like guy friends. I can fart, and they still think it's funny and we all laugh like twelve-year-olds.
I still like "inappropriate" and "twisted" jokes. Ones that cover topics that make most of us cringe, but are a little bit funny if the joke is done properly. I'm sick puppy.
I also still like kids' jokes that most of my adult friends find lame.
Lame kids' joke: What's the difference between broccoli and boogers?
Kids don't eat broccoli.
That one still makes me giggle, and I'm 34 now. Pathetic I know. | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 1/29/2009 1:40:20 PM | LakeCountyGal......I 100% agree with ya! I find the strangest, weirdest jokes extremely funny when no one else does. I just can't seem to help myself! And love the kids' jokes too! I have a good audience since I work with kids, so I actually can seem pretty "cool" when I tell them!  | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 2/2/2009 12:36:44 AM | I thought I would contribute another one although a bit risque.
I heard this the other day....
Did you know that "69" has now been changed to "96"?
Due to the economic conditions, the cost of eating out is too expensive.
LOL
~~Beth~~ | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 2/2/2009 12:56:14 AM | Why to they put brail on the key pads on a drive up ATM machine?
No joke just a funny thought.
Just like when you see a deer crossing sign on the road, is there a People Crossing sign in the woods for the deers? | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 2/4/2009 3:56:39 PM | A DAMN FINE EXPLANATION
The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman.
And she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me -- a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'
And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'
And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.
I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days.
So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean-up, I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.
Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight.
I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste.
I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same.'
The husband took a quick breath and continued - 'She was so grateful for my understanding and help that as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, 'Please ... Do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?' | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 2/5/2009 1:31:39 PM | | A man sat in a restaurant just about to order dinner when a prawn c.ocktail hits him on the back of the head.He quickly turns round to see who threw it and the man sat at the next table looks him in the eye points at him and says and that's just for starters mate | |
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| Jokes that crack you up but others don't find 'that' funny
Posted: 2/5/2009 6:32:40 PM | a scientist caught a frog and tied a piece of twine around its middle
on the first day the scientist set the frog at the beginning stripe and said, "jump frog! jump!" the frog jumped...
and the scientist wrote in his notebook: 'frog with four legs jumps 18 inches'
on the second day the scientist cut off one of the frog's legs, set him at the beginning stripe and said, "jump frog! jump!" the frog jumped....
and the scientist wrote in his notebook: 'frog with three legs jumps 12 inches'
on the third day the scientist cut off another one of the frog's legs, set him at the beginning stripe and said, "jump frog! jump!" the frog jumped....
and the scientist wrote in his notebook: 'frog with two legs jumps 8 inches'
on the fourth day the scientist cut off the third of the frog's legs, set him at the beginning stripe and said, "jump frog! jump!" the frog jumped....
and the scientist wrote in his notebook: 'frog with one leg jumps 4 inches'
on the fifth day the scientist cut off the last of the frog's legs, set him at the beginning stripe and said, "jump frog! jump!" the frog didn't jump....
"jump frog! jump!" said the scientist even louder, but the frog moved not a bit... "JUMP FROG! JUMP! JUMP!!!" shouted the scientist, but the frog remained still...
and the scientist wrote in his notebook: 'frog with no legs goes deaf' | |
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