| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 7:16:45 PM | you say you had been intimate with him "several times" in the one month you dated him? Maybe that was the problem. I would consider it a lesson learned and take the next relationship more slowly. Again, just my 2 cents worth.
There are legions of people who will take their knickers down in less than a month for the right one. A month can seem long when you really want something.
For the OP, me thinks she thought he was THE ONE. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 7:21:49 PM | | You should never think someone is the one after only knowing them for that amount of time. It's lust...pure and simple. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 7:36:21 PM |
Maybe that was the problem. I would consider it a lesson learned and take the next relationship more slowly. Again, just my 2 cents worth
Get real,what is she supposed to wait for,Prince Charming??? She`s 42 years old and she was attracted to him so why not have sex with him. At least now she doesn`t have to wonder what she missed. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 7:37:58 PM | For a lot of men ..... it's just EASIER and more CONVENIENT for them this way. Telling you can only go 2 ways - a long talk about why he's doing this to which the answer will be 'I just don't like you that much' (uncomfortable for him), or you dont even show much emotion about it (hurts his ego). A lot of men do this to girls they don't really like THAT much, they have only dated for a SHORT TIME and have HAD SEX with. They've got what they want, they're ready to go on looking for someone they might like more and they feel it didnt last that long to warrant long explanations. Selfish, I know, but unfortunately these days most people (and i dont mean just men) are.
Also very likely he met someone else or he might have stuck around a little longer, albeit with the same results eventually. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 7:43:51 PM | Take your knickers down indeed... Ive been guilty of that a time or many!!learned lessons,I guess I agree with the lady saying NOW she knows whats shes missing at least!!Its better to go slow with the intamacy thing especial if you want another month or so..I think people should just be honest and not just disappear its only the right thing to do..out of respect for yourselves and other..dust yourself off and realize his loss!!! | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 7:46:19 PM | Silent break off
Posted: 12/21/2007 6  40 PM Hi Sweetie... I am so sorry he did this to you. I am going thru a similar situation. He's in Florida and I am in Virginia. He always promised me if we were thru he would tell me. Yeah right. He just quit communicating with me after 2 1/2 years. I called, I emailed, I texted....to no avail. I gave up. This was in March. Every once in awhile he will send me an offline message with nothing more than a smily face. This last one he sent, I responded and poured my heart out. Still no response. So, I went on a website he belongs to and read the shoutbox. He now has someone living with him. Needless to say, a brick upside my head wouldn't have hurt as much. So I posted a nasty message in a forum there and felt so much better. Sorry I am rambling but this is theraputic! As others have posted, be thankful he is her problem now. Yes, he does have another woman. I know it will be hard to get over but please try real hard. I am struggling and hoping to meet a great fish here. He's a coward. You are strong and everything happens for a reason....your guardian angel stepped in on this one! Happy Holidays!!!
So are you saying this is a different guy that isn't living with another woman? | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 8:08:23 PM | You need to read the book HE'S REALLY NOT THAT INTO YOU. It explains something that happens frequently. When you act like you're not interested in a guy, maybe he will pursue you and pursue you, like winning a game. He will keep on trying, and keep trying. On a certain level, you hurt him, and now he is going to pursue you to the end.... and when he wins you over... his intention is to DROP YOU, AND DROP YOU HARD. He, all along, has had a deep underlying resentment and hostility toward you, and he is showing you a lesson of what it feels like.
Women do this to guys, as well. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 8:22:16 PM | I don't recall reading that in that book. Honestly.
But, it is very common for a woman not be interested in a man initially and then develop feelings after they get to know them. I don't think he intended to drop you and drop you hard. I think the whole thing just ran its course. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 8:30:58 PM |
Why were you intimate with him so quick? You came off as EASY. I gotta tell you, men will have little respect for you when you do that.
To the poster ^^^^ Maybe you should start associating with grown-ups rather than children. Men don't say things like that; boys do--no matter what their age.
I have a stack of stones here--let's throw them at the OP.
You cannot judge every situation by the stereotypical judgments of "them."
OP, again, who knows why he POOFED, but do NOT let these self-righteous, sanctimonious, know-it-alls make you feel bad for your actions. Whatever the reason he left, it was not because you had sex with him too early. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 8:34:15 PM |
It's lust...pure and simple.
What's wrong with lust? I revel in lust. I wallow in lust. I love lust.
But with the OP, it was more than lust--infatuation, maybe, but that is different from lust.
Get real,what is she supposed to wait for,Prince Charming??? She`s 42 years old and she was attracted to him so why not have sex with him. At least now she doesn`t have to wonder what she missed.
Brava, Mogrl! Let's have lunch sometimes. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 8:49:36 PM | After being intimate, and seeing each other for a month, the least he could do is at least tell her that he doesn't want to see her anymore. She didn't even get a freakin' email to let her know (which would take less than two minutes and wouldn't involve that big confrontation that cowardly men are so scared of). I was just wondering if the OP tried to contact the man when he disappeared.
I'm not surprised by the behaviour. Men have disappeared on me too (not any serious ones though). It's pretty common, but it doesn't make it right! | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/23/2008 9:50:29 PM | | May be he got smart and figured it was a waste of his time to chase a separated person. i still cant figure out why a separated person would want to put a SO thur your divorce you all must be sadstic. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 6:18:45 AM |
put a SO thur your divorce you all must be sadstic.
ARGH! "Through"? "Sadistic"?
I know people hate to have comments on their spelling/grammar, etc., but come on, folks! Let's at least make ourselves understandable and legible. Use spell-check. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 7:28:40 AM | My guess would be he is married.
It seems to be a way with some men on here. (SOME)
No guts. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 9:26:56 AM | I don't believe in calling women easy or sluts. They have
their needs too. Where they get into trouble is getting
intimate because it feels good, and then assuming that
the man owes them something in the way of an emotional
connection. Why do so many women always have double
standards?
One other thing. Believe it or not, sex isn't the number one
thing that men are interested in as far as a long term relationship.
They are looking to find a comfort zone and security! No nagging,
trying to change him, and no drama! So, if a man gets to know a
woman and starts to get the impression that the woman will not offer
this comfort zone, he will likely look elsewhere! I think some women,
when they think they have a man hooked (with sex) then they start working
on him! They change into their real selves! | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 10:42:00 AM |
things he didn't have to say because I liked him from hello.
Seems to me that "hello" were the e-mails you ignored. If you liked him from hello, then why ignore his e-mails?
If I am not what you were looking for why can't you men be honest?
If you weren't interested, then why didn't you say so instead of just ignoring his e-mails?
Seriously, I find it hysterical when someone pisses and moans about it when someone treats them the way they treat other people.
Sounds to me that this is just a case of "what goes around, comes around" and it bit you in the butt. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 10:58:52 AM | Why is it always the man's fault when there were 2 people in this thing? No one here knows how you behaved, what signals you gave off, how you treated him, what your attitude was. Men usually cut off contact because they get spooked.
Some women start talking about marriage and begin auditioning for the role as wife. Some women get moody, clingy and needy. Some women start demanding all of his time. Some women get all excited at "hello" without letting the relationship unfold. Some women have unrealistic expectations that a man might realize he can never live up to. Some women meet 1 man and put all their eggs in his basket and the man feels that pressure. Some women go insane when a man tries to be honest. Some women are told the truth in subtle ways yet refuse to hear it and wonder why the man "suddenly" stopped calling.
It's almost never totally 1 person's fault. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 12:00:09 PM |
He always promised me if we were thru he would tell me.He just quit communicating with me after 2 1/2 years
There's nothing like being in a starter relationship thingy and knowing the ax could fall at any time. This gives me the impression that the relationship was not on solid ground with all the red flags and clauses.
no response.So I posted a nasty message in a forum there and felt so much better. Sorry I am rambling but this is therapeutic!
Yes, reading the forums and I see that in a lot folks in that there replies in shaming there ex's or others of there past wrongs. I think if one is not finished and moved first
on how the heck do you think they are ready to get into a new relationship now.
You are strong and everything happens for a reason..
I never likes that saying because things happen when one takes action and not just sit back and wait for it to happen. There is a difference and if humpy dumpy is not all quite whole one might want to swim in safer waters,imo. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 12:34:23 PM | It sounds to me like you did something that made him angry. You probably
did not realize it!
Maybe you were not a match
hugs | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 12:45:59 PM | He stopped calling because he had no further use in his life for you......It hurts but it happens...............We, as human beings, sometimes behave like dumb animals with no respect for other people's feeling. We dont communicate but look for every little flaw to nourish our fears and cull others from our lives...... Not many of us are brave enough to say... I dont like what is happening here.......We feel we dont have enough time left to give chances and work out relationship kinks........(and yes, some can be worked out unless the person has mental or psychological issues then it's best you walk away)...instead, we are all looking for the perfect person who is everything we would like them to be. People have perfected that game of pretense so now can use it at their will to suit whatever purpose.
Doesn't matter how they come on to you, they will eventually, in some way try to play you.......It's the ole power and ego trip at work................
Just hang tough, love yourself and be happy......and play by your own rules | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 12:48:48 PM | | I am not sure if you were intimate with him or not, but sometimes once we do that, and I have, then they just move on. Sometimes they say things during the heat of the moment that later they regret and are too ashamed to admit it. Or they THINK that is what they want, and then they get an email the next day from someone they just might like better, or think they do. The thing about these sites, IF we could just find one person, be happy with them and dont go back to these sites. I think they can become addictive in a sort. You keep looking and looking and looking, and get a high each time someone emails you back. I know I have been doing this for 5 years and probably have met 80-90 guys. Usually the ones I like dont like me and the ones that like me, I dont like. Someday it may just click, who knows, that is why we keep looking. But dont take it personal, really, some guys are just like that. | |
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| WHY DID HE STOP CALLING?
Posted: 1/24/2008 12:55:15 PM | | OP, you ignored his emails at first, there must have been a reason? The truth is, it was probably your instincts telling you that it wasn't worth getting into, yet eventually the guy in question managed to persuade you. You should have stuck with your initial impression, and that's all I can tell you based on my OHP. Instincts are there for a reason, listen to them! | |
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