| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/8/2008 5:51:31 PM | | not really sure what to say on this subject, my ex is still wearing her engagement ring even tho we have parted, i mean why wear the damn thing your through with me. i just put all her stuff in a box, and put it in the utility building for now, just doing 2 things here, waiting and hoping, but not much chance, and then i'm moving on, can't put your life on hold for what could've been, so, tomorrow is a brighter day, even tho it still hurts like 40 hells | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/9/2008 4:34:29 AM | Toss the pictures, and cd's. Keep the stuff that u really like, uless your so pissed you don't want to. You could use the shirts as dust rags or something like that. From my experience it all ends up in the trash anyways at some point in time.
I think it's immature to return gifts but then again I used my last ex's shirt to clean my bathtub. lol | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/9/2008 5:24:51 AM | Again!! Thank you all for the relies.
This has turned out to be a pretty good topic.
As stated above a few times by some members, I guess it all really depends on the circumstances under which the break up took place.
All that to say and as I have said before, for me (us) its was a bit on the mutual side, we are not enemies, but we have not had contact since 39 days now.
I heard at the gym that she is going through a tough time, but hey if she is strong enough to stay without taking to me, I too can play that game. She has put on weight in the wrong places...she'll be fine. I just wish people stopped giving me updates on her, or asking me if we are together or not.
They see me with different women, get the hint?
With this, all of her gifts are important to me, she gave them all to me from the heart and were not forced.
NOW had the break up been an ugly one, you can be sure that by now I would have destroyed all items  hahahahhaah
She gave me this really cool necklace last summer, I am having made in gold. It has a symbol: PROTECTION on it. I was applying to the Police at that point. LOVE the meaning of it.
Thank you all for the replies and certainly I do appreciate each one of them...yes yes even the ones that advice to burn the gifts and or given them to a hooker..... I am a hooker
Emilio | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/9/2008 5:34:22 AM | | kept the pictures stored them away. anything else jewellery dvds cds etc sold, and now am hiring a hall out and having a party for me family and friends to say thanks for the support they gave me.so am getting something good out of items from my old life. | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/9/2008 6:06:38 AM | | Mines a little different, I been split now for 3months, my mad ex, although said she loved me and was in love with me left for someone else, leaving me penniless and homeless... I'm back on my feet again now, got plenty of work, and a good choice of women... doing an edit for a company yesterday, i found all footage I shot of her and her 2 year old and my little one at the beech and stuff like that... I didn't really have the heart to delete them. Stuff like that of your kids are irreplaceable... So I wrestled with myself for a good while as to what to do with it, delete it or send it all as a DVD to her mums? Being a Television cameraman its quality stuff. I didn't want it to go to her or the home we built together... I didnt really wanna cause her any probs... we haven't spoken since, and i didnt want her thinking it was a way of me bringing back the past, I'm done with her... So I sent them to her mums, saying I burned these, I didn't have the heart to delete them, so I am handing them onto you to see if you wanted them or not... I know grandparents love stuff like that. and the kids too... I just knew how I'd feel if i lost that stuff of my daughter. does that makes sense? | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/9/2008 12:43:19 PM | I recently broke up with my ex and returned all the Christmas gifts he gave me. They were all engraved with NOCLYMTID and TKTMH " No one can love you more than I do" and "The key to my heart" I'm sure some other woman is wearing a recycled diamond necklace.
The guy I dated before this one was a real loser... I took all the gifts he ever gave me and sold them on Ebay and donated the money to Social Justice.
  
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/9/2008 9:46:19 PM | Hi Emilio, my name is Lorenzo. It appears you want to get rid of something else besides what she has given you. The most precious things she gave you was her love and her body. This two things are the ones you can never give or discard. You ask why, because these two wonderful gifts are immaterial and come from the spirit of the heart.
Keep these beautiful memories and let them make you happy and not sad or lonely. You have to ask yourself why you are lonely? Don't blame yourself or that nice woman. What has happened is in the past and nothing can bring it or her back. Just with your question of what to do with her gifts, makes me wonder how much love you put into this relationship.
Learn from your mistakes and next time, take a moment before you say or do anything. Sometimes words can cut like a knife and actions can project the wrong perceptions.
Stay lose, chill out and enjoy life for it comes and goes like the wind.
Your Friend , Lorenzo
As for the material things she gave you, if you are angry you will probably trash them. But take a moment and think, did she give me these gifts when she loved me? Keep them and wear them with pride, for she cared enough to but them. If you trash them you will be showing your bad side.
Emilio please take these words as wisdom and nothing else. Keep busy, be active and try to remember her in a good way. Who know maybe someday she will see you wearing her gifts. She may not come back to you, but she will have more respect for you then before she left. | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/9/2008 9:52:45 PM | | I was thinking the same thing. with my ex husband, I saved a few things to pass on to my kids. But after the end of a relationship, I don't know what to do with the "stuff". My ex BF was much more generous than my ex husband. I guess if it doesn't make me cry, I'll keep it! | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 11:49:53 AM | Lorenzo thank you very much for your post. It is nicely worded.
She purchased this pretty nice necklace last summer, it has a sign on it: PROTECTION in writing on the back.
Well I am having this plaque made in gold. and I am getting a link chain for it.
I love what it symbolizes. I always told her that it was the most inexpensive gift she ever gave to me, but THE BEST gift ever hahahah
I meant that. You are right, I am bound to bump into her, and I generally always have something she gave me on.
I carry some amazing memories into my next life of her.
Thank you again for all the posts written above!!
Emilio | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 11:57:54 AM | | i throw it all out or give it all to someone that might want or need it or give it to the salvation army why bother keeping gifts from someone that you cared about? getting over the person is hard and i wouldnt make it harder by having junk he bought for me around my place, lol or i'd burn it all. | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 1:49:13 PM | | here we get down to entitlemen. If she gives you a gift it is yours. If you give her a gift it is hers. Now if you have stuff of hers lying around your house.... Like say an xbox a DVD player. eachothers clothes give them back. My ex-girlfriend has an uncountable number of my socks that she has no plans on giving back. she wears them. ITs not like she stole my car though they are socks. We ahve bought eachother some decent gifts over the eyars we kept those becuase theya re gifts. And She is giving me my DVD player back. | |
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dcook
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Joined: 10/14/2006
Msg: 117 | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 3:30:45 PM | Oh, I just have to share this one - how I found this thread.
I went to check my email, and this is what I saw:
Broken Hearts: After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Dating Experiences: Genital Herpes
Some gifts just keep on giving.
- Excog. | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 3:55:55 PM | Box the pics. use the frames for your fishing/football/etc photos.
Leftover frames & other junk-yard sale or donate to charity.
Diamond Bracelet/jewelry/expensive stuff, save for the next gal or surprise your mother for mother's day.
Three years later I'm still feeling the effects...we broke up three weeks before the wedding...I took all the engraved stuff and traded it in for new stuff for ME...an engraved giant mug with King James on it  Gotta get the ole ego running again...can't stay in the dumper. A pocketwatch & keychain engraved...and a pocket flask engraved...I just switched it from being all about her and reminded myself that it's all about ME and My Happiness...if someone doesn't love you for you...they can fawk off and you just keep moving on. But it still sucks and it still will hit you below the belt until you find someone else to love...so don't just mope because the best way to get over someone is to get UNDER someone else
   Preferrably several someone else's!! | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 4:03:30 PM | | It depends on if they mean anything to you ... of which if you are posting this it must be true ... I'd have a bon-fire with them so you don't have to have those memories and what not to think of ... start with a fresh slate - oh ya, and start by pawning that nice watch and getting something just for you too ... | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 4:18:58 PM | Wordaholic wrote:
"week 1....come get your stupid shit
week 2....i dont want your stupid shit
week 4....why doesnt he want his stupid shit
week 7...stupid shit
week 10.....wow, i could use this stupid shit
week 13.....man this is some great shit
bet i got the best set of tools a broad could never want,, but has" : 
OMG, you should copyright that if it is original! It is soooooo true. Emotionally, things change and some of that stuff is going to come in handy. I had been married 21 years and did not get rid of stuff right away. Much of it was packed. There are still photos under the glass in my coffee table mostly cuz I don't pay attention to the fact they are there and there's usually tons of junk on it. The rest of the photos are boxed up. He got rid of all our photos and even sent tons of kids photos over to me so much so I find it hard to believe he has any left.
Sold all the jewelry and got virtually nothing for it including a 4 carat diamond tennis bracelet, but I might have kept it if I hadn't needed the money so badly at the time. Clothes? Are you kidding? I got rid of the stuff that didn't fit anymore, but I acquired much during the marriage. Got some new stuff after, but if I had gotten rid of the clothes that would have been a waste. Too costly to get more.
My son just went thru his stuff after a breakup tho, and got rid of all the clothes. I say do what feels right.
Judging from all the posts, there is no protocol. Except to the gentleman who wanted to know about whether he could melt done a composite ring yet again and reuse -
nyet nyet nay no nein neva! ahah nowayjose ohnohedi'intaskthat... | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 6:38:29 PM | Break-ups are very hard to take sometimes, almost like death...
Here is a quote I recently told her...
"Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell..." AND "Ask me why I keep on loving you when it's clear that you don't feel the same way for me... the problem is that as much as I can't force you to love me, I can't force myself to stop loving you."
When we broke up, I stopped eating for six weeks, I lost 35 lbs. It's been just over a year now and I've got my Sh*t together. Yes, there are days that I still hurt, but those are getting less and less. I moved to another city, left behind the hurts and moved on. Sooner or later you're going to come to the realization that the world goes on and that as the scar is healing, do not pick at it for you will open old wounds. This includes keeping little things that have sentimental value (pictures, jewellery, clothes, whatever...) place them where you can't see them and should someone come into your life, make sure you don't carry the baggage with you. I've had lots of offers, however I want a BBW because I learned that is my preference.  Now if only I can find a single one...
Gifts are gifts, if your children loved her, then give the gifts to them. It will have more sentimental value too. Sometimes you have to come to the realization that two lives are not meant to be (any longer) and your path lies elsewhere. That what you had was a beautiful chapter in your life, you cannot change that, however you have a new calling and you must go... When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us. There are POF available...
Happy  | |
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| After the break-up: What to do with all the gifts from your ex?
Posted: 2/10/2008 8:05:07 PM | | Well my X took what she knew meant a lot to me, A mink coat from my Grandmother was the first thing she grabbed. Any one of my 3 sisters would have loved it, My dog that was was a gift from my father for taking such care of his dying mother. These 2 things meant the most to me. Everything else is just stuff, I went through mediation and gave her what she wanted. STUFF can always be replaced. Why pay a lawyer $400.00 an hour to fight over a $50.00 set of pots and pans is my thinking. | |
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