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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > what does a guy mean when he says "you deserve better"?      Home login  
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 Romantic Heretic
Joined: 10/24/2007
Msg: 26
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?Page 2 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
It means he's not that into the woman and hasn't the guts to say so.
 Account Deleted
Joined: 1/8/2008
Msg: 27
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:33:16 AM
Completely agree with speciallady4u


That's an "insecurity" issue. That's NOT a compliment my dear.


Confidence is attractive, poor me stuff .. zzzzZZZZ

A.S.is
 bidut
Joined: 1/9/2008
Msg: 28
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:39:53 AM
That could mean either,
1. He realise that long distance relationship is tricky and complicated, and as much as he loves to spend time with you, he feels unease that both of you cant really embrace this relationship to the most since you both are apart. This obstacle makes him thinking that you deserve better. If he pulls away ,that means he believes its not gonna work, if he doesnt, this means he was just expressing what he feels. If you really likes him, you should encourage him.

2. He doesnt want to be with you.
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 29
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:56:01 AM
You deserve better=you don't deserve me
 Urs Truly
Joined: 10/15/2007
Msg: 30
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 8:58:24 AM
He is telling you , to find someone closer to you if your are in different countries... maybe he can't come to you, or you can't go to him.. sometimes we have to let go of someone we love for the best ....it's called love.. you love that person , that you are willing to let him/her go in search of their happiness... A year is a long time to spent on line with someone , I can say time heals but then you know that... take care and remember there is a greater love in "Christ" who heals and take away your pain...
 oggers
Joined: 5/10/2007
Msg: 31
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 9:08:01 AM
it means I deserve better , and theres a hot bit of totty elsewhere that I wouldn't mind shagging right now .........
 chelsea_hou
Joined: 5/26/2007
Msg: 32
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 9:52:29 AM
He's lost interest and he thinks that line let you down gently
 zestyvirginia
Joined: 1/14/2008
Msg: 33
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:01:16 AM
They want out of yur life and I do this all the time when I want to exit.
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 34
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:23:33 AM
I dont think the words matter as long as the message is delivered respectfully and nice. Bottom line, its not gonna work, so why worry about it - move on and find better.
Dating can be hard and no one likes dealing with the dust of rejection as it stings. So, pick yourself up, appreciate that the person had the decency to not string you along and move on, or as one of my friends would say "Next!"
 Mizfriendly
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 35
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:26:04 AM
In a relationship with the guy/girl its usually a polite way of saying 'Shove off' 'I'm off' ! ;)
 Kekun
Joined: 9/16/2007
Msg: 36
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:26:51 AM
It's so sad but it looks unfortunately obvious to nearly everybody here.

It's a "polite" way to say to someone you're not interested anymore. But I must say that after 100 of emails and 1 year, hum, it's kind of cruel also. He could have make up his mind before !!! Hence the brackets I put around "polite"...
 searching4u444
Joined: 8/30/2007
Msg: 37
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:33:43 AM
It means exactly that!Remember that some men are very direct whether they choose to be or not.If he says you're "too good" for him, or "you deserve better."..he means it!Believe him!
Clearly he can't live up to what he thinks you're entitled to.If it's at all possible,take it as a compliment and move on,and the next one you see him with will most likely be more on his level .Ouch!This may pinch,but it'll pass,and whatever you do at this point...don't stoop(to that level) to connect with him
 Softcharms
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 38
What does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:37:53 AM
Hongchina, I think he basically mean you both are not compatible, but in a polite and humble approach. I'd take it and move on. ~ Hugs.
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 39
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:38:44 AM
When I receive a "you deserve better" note, I always reply with a thank you note and tell the man that there are no hard feelings as there are not on my end. I appreciate that I have not been lied to, played or strung along. I have always believed that when a man tells a woman that he is "bad" or that "you deserve better", he is telling the truth and you should believe him. Be nice, say thank you and move on.
 DenaliDadd
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 40
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:44:33 AM

Context please? Did he say it when you were talking about ...

Trust me. With men, there is no "context" because the meaning is the same, no matter what you were talking about. Really.
 .Marc
Joined: 2/11/2007
Msg: 41
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:50:45 AM
Doesn't matter what he means--- if a person tells you that they're not good enough for you... they're probably right....
 Kiss_My_Karma~
Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 42
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 10:58:37 AM

Doesn't matter what he means--- if a person tells you that they're not good enough for you... they're probably right....


Bingo.

It means they don't want to spend time on/with you anymore and want you to push on, but they think the fact that they say you're so wonderful and you deserve better, means you'll think they are totally selfless. He just wants to move on, and he wants you to move on too.
 jcolsa
Joined: 12/20/2007
Msg: 43
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:06:43 AM
As many have said.. It means that its over its your cue to leave..

This for both men and women... At best it should be a big flag especially if those words are followed by having less time to spend or change in attitude whether good or bad.. I would not chance it get yourself ready for it to end..
 CommonMistakes
Joined: 1/16/2008
Msg: 44
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:11:16 AM
They had an "online" relationship, if you want to consider that a real relationship. Seems there was no likelyhood of them ever meeting in person, her being in CHINA, and him whereever. Not surprisingly most people are dogging the guy out. That's the typical,especially from the ladies.

He is probably trying to let her down easy. As there seems little likelyhood of this becoming an inperson, real relationship. Perhaps he has found someone else,and this is his way out, but it's not like they were ever together.
 okcgreeneyes1029
Joined: 1/23/2007
Msg: 45
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:11:32 AM
1. He is trying to rid himself of her.
2. She really does deserve better.

The girl in this situation needs to catch on at this point. He has probably given hints in the 100 emails, but was too nice of a person to say there wasn't anything other than a friendly interest. It might hurt, but give him a little respect for trying to brighten the light bulb of the "girl's" head when she wouldn't.

Liz
 Ignoble
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 46
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:13:03 AM
RE: First post.

Means he's an insecure coward. He has self esteem issues.
 Account Deleted
Joined: 1/8/2008
Msg: 47
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:16:25 AM
Good-bye
So Long
Alvedasane (sp??!!)
Farewell
Adieu
To you to you and you and you ooooooooooooo

Gooooooooooooooooooood bye

Too bad people wouldn't just say what they mean and mean what the say .. would then leave the other party without a doubt and free to Move on!

Some say its his way of being nice, not hurting your f eelings .. I say he's not able to be honest and doesn't mind that he's left you confused as to what he really meant.

Honest really is the kinder choice .. in the long run.

JMHO

A.S.is
 nocalsingledad
Joined: 11/27/2007
Msg: 48
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what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:20:15 AM

what does he mean?


Could mean lots of things, none of them good.

Could mean he has "skeletons" in his closet and isn't what he appears to be on the surface (like that time he was celibate for 5 to 15 years).

Could mean that he has some serious psych issues, thinks he is fundamentally a "bad" person and that everyone eventually "discovers" that once they get to really know him and they eventually run away.

Could mean that he is the kind of guy with really high standards and is one of those who figures any woman who would go for him isn't good enough for him.

Could mean that he thinks you can, and will eventually do much better than him. That you are way out of his league. He will be constantly afraid that someone better is going to come along and you are going to "jump ship".

Anyway, I would suggest you not invest a lot of time/effort into this one and just let it go. If he is saying "you deserve better" then maybe he is right.
 CompletelyDone
Joined: 8/12/2007
Msg: 49
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:26:53 AM
I would not attach so much importance to any one thing a person says to me that I would actually try to base long term decisions on it without asking HIM what he means. Anything we might offer is pure speculation and has a rather giant error factor. Since you talk well about many things, why not ask him what he meant?
 rjb888
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 50
what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/26/2008 11:33:44 AM
Maybe he knows that he is a dirt bag guy and she really does deserve better then him. Take him at he's word he knows himself better than she does. He's doing her a favor.

Yeah I agree it is a cowardly way of saying BYE!
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