| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:35:37 AM | | How can we really answer that, your best bet would be to actually ask him, we are all very different and as for all our guesses, it could be something totally different. If you have to ask others for their opinion you obviously have doubts about this guy. | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:43:15 AM | I will admit, something can be lost in the translation...but I think this post keeps going on b/c of the number of people in this culture who still don't get it--guys aren't honest about their inability to keep a relationship going b/c they think it will attract the female.
Guys are honest about this, so they can later refute all arguments by explaining, "but I told you this about me a long time ago."
Ladies, when a guy says something negative about the relationship...LISTEN. | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 4:30:42 PM | | Yes I believe it is just a gutless way of getting out of a situation they don't want to be in...let me guess - he added that you are a very special person blah blah blah but I just can't give you want you want right now??!! The ironic thing here is, he is right and you probably do deserve better... | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 4:34:40 PM | It means he doesn't want you.
there are any number of possible reasons, many already listed by the wise folk of POF
does it matter what it is.
When you love someone and want them, you do not send them off to meet someone else.
Plain and simple. | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 4:47:58 PM | | Since he lives in a different country he's probably thinking that there's no practical way for this to continue, and when relationships don't move forward they die. Having never met in person it may be that she's been his fun little fantasy girl, but he's met someone in real life and wants to move on. But whether or not his decision involves anyone else, what he's really saying is "goodbye". | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 4:50:09 PM | | What it means is that he has already found better and trying to let her down gently. Hey a least he's trying although coming straight out with it would probably bet better for everyone. | |
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memori
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Joined: 12/27/2006
Msg: 85 | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 6:46:59 PM | | Sounds like the fellow has tired of the "online" relationship and wishes to move on to another without hurting your feelings. Which I think he already has? If there was any intents of truly persuing something, the two of you would have found some way to meet up over all this time. Good luck darlin! | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/27/2008 6:52:42 PM | Given your particular circumstances, it sounds like he's trying hard to be fair...and to let you know it's impractical to meet or go any further with the relationship. You BOTH deserve better than sitting at a computer and typing to someone you've never seen in person. He might have feelings - he might not - either way, he's right, you deserve better, and if it's not likely that you'll meet, then it's a good idea not to become any MORE emotionally involved than you are. Proponents of the Long-Distance thing will argue that "that's what planes are for" but it's pretty impractical to imagine either of you leaving your respective countries and starting a new life to be close to someone you've just met.
This guy is doing you a favor. Under any other circumstances, I'd say he was being cowardly and trying to "weasel out".  | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/29/2008 7:00:19 AM | | my ex-boyfreind used that line on me when we broke up. because he found someone else who was a big, fat ho literally. he is telling you that he does not want to pursue a relationship with you, because he knows it will not work. move on. we are on plentyoffish after all. lots of men to choose from find someone else. | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/29/2008 9:26:48 AM | | who really knows what the guy means exactly. the girl invested too much emotionally in a guy she's never met in person. this girl would not take any guy very seriously that she has not met to check out. | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/29/2008 9:35:27 AM | | i think if you have talked to him this long, just ask him what he meant,maybe he was trying to compliment you,maybe he has low self esteem maybe he wants you to move on,but the point is no one knows except for him.ask him | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/29/2008 10:08:15 AM | Yes like IvoriesGirl said above me,
sometimes it means just that "you deserve better", i.e. someone that can reciprocate the feelings you are currently exhibiting...
I've only used the line once, and it was on an ex-girlfriend when I was breaking up with her, and I MEANT it - I couldn't return the affections she had, and I wanted her to have a guy that COULD. Since it clearly wasn't me at the time, better that we split now while she's only mildly attached than we get more involved and I devastate her down the road.
It hurt her like hell for a month or two, but I kept in touch as I really did care what happens to her, and we're great friends now and she DID find that man. I've met him, he's awesome, and I suspect that any month now he'll drop to one knee as they've already got a condo together... 
I miss her, but have no regrets and feel overjoyed that my gut instinct was right for once...  | |
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| What does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/29/2008 2:29:51 PM | A guy and a girl, who met on plentyoffish.com and chatted
exchanging quite cheerful thoughts about music, life, family
and many other things.
They have never meet in person because they live in different countries.
BUT~!
BUT the guy tells the girl, "you deserve better".
What does he mean?
__________________________________
This could depend on many things but several that come immediately
to mind are:
1. They are having an online friendship and because of their respective
differences in age, life goals, distances between them to name a few don't
bode well for this ever becoming more than 'pen-pals' he feels that he
should encourage you to seek more age appropriate and locale available
companionship. (' ')
2. He is too busy to continue the amount of time that the 'contacts' require
and is seeking a polite way to reduce their frequency or intensity.
Without knowing more information about the situation it is difficult to
know what is meant.
Why not ask him directly ? Unless he has blocked you from more contact
in which case this was pretty much a wasted question. | |
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EH1
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Joined: 1/8/2008
Msg: 99 | |
| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/29/2008 2:38:13 PM | | There is no way to know what that means. More then likeley it is either the fact that he found someone else and is not interested anymore or he is hiding something that he feels ashamed of and used that line as way to keep her away. | |
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| what does a guy mean when he says you deserve better?
Posted: 1/29/2008 2:40:55 PM | Hongchina,
I've heard that comment numerous times and each time I hear a man utter those words I wanna kick him in his...* you can use your imagination*. To me it's a cop-out or cheesy way out of saying one of the following:
1. I'm really not that into you, but I'm sure you will find someone who will be.
2. My significant other found out I'm cheating and I have to cut ya loose but want to sound like a hero instead of zero.
3. You make a wonderful friend ( maybe a good F*ck Buddy) but I have no emotional connection to ya.
4. You might be someone I could date, but I see no future with you.
5. I've used this line on lot's of women and it made me feel better to make her feel special, even though I'm a huge donkey d*ck 
And for a small population of men, they truly mean you are someone they see as probably deserving of a man they THINK they don't measure up too. Personally, it could mean a number of things...and the only person who really knows what they meant is the party who said it.
Just my thoughts. | |
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