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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 6:23:44 AM | Integrity does cost you something, but the rewards are more than worth the investment. It costs time, investment, sometimes hard work, and sometimes those who have less than integrity.
But the rewards are self confidence, respect, and trust. Maybe more that I can't recall at the moment.
["I treat my women like a queen".]
That is an incomplete sentence born from the ruminations of a mind that knows what it is thinking but doesn't express itself in completeness.
What he is really saying is that he has treated, all the women he has ever had a relationship with in the past, like a queen. One at a time most likely, lol, or we'd like to think.
["I personally am not impressed by cars. They are not interesting to me. Just please have one, preferable one color. And having an expensive car doesn't mean one has money anyway. It more than likely means he is heavily in debt.
There again, I don't care about the guy's bank account, just please be able to support yourself. I don't need or want someone to support me."]
Yes I'm generalizing, but people who ask for more than average usually have more than average or at least got used to living with more than average. Good for them if they want "more" for themselves. I want more for me too. My goals aren't set at getting rich, but no one who wants to keep growing in life should ever want to settle for status quo, don't you think?
["Some guys are deluded. If their previous realtionship ended badly, they probably don't think they did a thing wrong if they are making statements like that. Why would any "women" get rid of a guy who "treats them like a queen?" ]
Now that is just untrue. If you treat your man good and he dumps you then it most be your fault?
Sometimes some people are never satisfied. Some people don't like "nice", can't handle "nice" even... Some people want to be treated as something other than a "queen" or "king" and don't like being put on a pedestal. There could be lots of reasons, amongst them could be wrong chemistry, or families that don't like the one that treats you so well. There are lots of frictions that can lead to a break up no matter how well a person treats another, and they may very well have nothing to do with the character of the person who treats his partners so well. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 7:08:53 AM | Actually, it is a complete sentence: it has a subject and a predicate 
But I see what you are saying. I thought it might have been a statement referring to the past, too, until I read further or even communicated with one of the guys who wrote it and I never inferred past tense.
I am not sure I understand your paragraph about "more than average" unless you are talking about lifestyles that people are used to. Settling for status quo is not a goal, of course, settling is certainly not a good thing in a relationship either. I am not sure what else you meant, though. Status quo materially-speaking?
Yes, some people don't like nice. Many, many (ugh) years ago my friend and I used to joke that we didn't like "nice guys". That was then, this is now. It was funny then, it would be pathetic now.
You wrote:
"Now that is just untrue. If you treat your man good and he dumps you then it most be your fault?"
Your statement is true but too deep. This is a forum and we are generalizing.
afx777 wrote:
"I'm always coming across profiles written by women where they clearly state along the lines of "I want to be wined, dined and treated like a princess".
How off putting if that? It just proves how materialistic and superficial some women are in the initial stages of dating, it's like women will expect the man to pay for everything then judge them on the size of their wallet and what gifts they receive without focusing on the person they are meant to be interested in."
This is a good example of a generation gap. While I agree anyone who states she wants to be treated like a princess is a put-off, "wining and dining" has meant "effort, attention, wooing" in the past. Now "guys" see it as materialistic. So if you open the car door for a woman, does she have to tip you?
I taught my sons to always pay on their dates, with the exception that if a relationship evolves there may be a more mutual form of spending. Guess who had to foot THAT bill a few times before they really started earning? But the point is, it is a sign of respect, a tradition that has lasted years. It doesn' t have to be the most expensive 5 star restaurant - it can be a box of wine and a picnic basket.
Unfortunately, I don't always get "wined and dined". I may get "whined" to death. And I have paid the check plenty of times on the first and/or subsequent dates, often relieved to just get the h**l out of there. Gloria Steinhem was a pioneer, but she did some of us women and injustice because guys have told me they just ASSUME women don't want doors open for them and make reference to Women's Lib.
If I meet someone for dinner or coffee for the first time, I will automatically go for my wallet. Sometimes I pay, sometimes they do. The ones who insist I put it away make a better impression on me. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 8:13:15 AM | I have had guys put me on a pedistal. It is not a comfortable place to be all the time. They require all of your time and seem to be a little needy. Believe you me, it is not a good sign to hear a man say that. Although they usually are the most devoted, loving, and faithful men around, I can't tell you if they would continue to be that way because I can only take so much of it. I require a certain amount of space in a relationship. If I don't get it, I pull away.
But that is just me.
I am declaring that it does happen, and my experiences have proven they are genuine about it. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 8:18:26 AM | To the OP:
Aside from other answers here, another thing I've seen happen in budding relationships is that a guy may say he'll treat you like a Princess or a Goddess, but as you get to know him you find that his version and your version of Princess/Goddess concepts and how they should be revered are two completely different things. Which, in short, boils down to major communication issues between a couple that may not be resolveable. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 8:25:24 AM | Hmmmm sounds like You'd have to be a Narcissist To want to be treated like a "Goddess or Princess" ALL the time. I know it would get on my nerves.
Treating someone with respect, and the "occasional" Goddess thing can be fun.. but 24/7... naaaah. I have seen the 24/7 type.. but only from a distance,.. I cross the street to avoid them.. They're right up there with "Drama Queens, Princesses, Divas," and the rest of the Drama Royal Family...   | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 9:15:32 AM |
I have seen the 24/7 type.. but only from a distance,.. I cross the street to avoid them.
A wise choice. If only all men thought the same, we'd rid the world of that attitude, one by one. I find it boorish and embarrassing that I am of the same gender. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 10:38:58 AM | OP, your profile says:
Indeed, I am an attractive, smart, high-maintenance woman wanting the simple yet basic things that life can offer me (diamonds, jewellery, and exotic vacations, just kidding!).
And the heading says that you are looking for an Exquisite gentleman.
Perhaps the man who contacted you and said he would treat you like a princess or a goddess was merely attempting to give you what it looks like you are seeking........
As My Pink Cadillac said:
afx777 wrote:
"I'm always coming across profiles written by women where they clearly state along the lines of "I want to be wined, dined and treated like a princess".
How off putting if that? It just proves how materialistic and superficial some women are in the initial stages of dating, it's like women will expect the man to pay for everything then judge them on the size of their wallet and what gifts they receive without focusing on the person they are meant to be interested in."
..........that's how your profile reads, OP..............
?????
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 12:12:21 PM | ["Actually, it is a complete sentence: it has a subject and a predicate"]
You got me there, lol...
["I am not sure I understand your paragraph about "more than average" ]
An average life, car, house, spouse, etc... Some people want better than average in all things, just look at the people who like to keep up with the Jones's. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/27/2008 12:12:38 PM | There’s yet another key phrase to watch out for: “put women up on a pedestal.” If she wants a pedestal, I’ll drop her off at the art museum! Call me old fashioned, or something, but I’ll always want my friend, lover and companion close enough that it’s easy to talk and hug. 
. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/28/2008 2:55:48 AM | [Why would any "women" get rid of a guy who "treats them like a queen?" ]
I have a good friend that I wanted to date and we never did mostly because she had been hurt two many times, I did treat her like a queen and she was so sure that it was a game on my part that she was afraid to give it a chance, now she tells me how great of a guy I am and how any woman would be lucky to have me.
Also it does depend a lot on the woman as well, I treat my lovely lady very well and although not the same still like a queen, but believe me the better she treats me the better I am able to treat her. Just maybe the woman spoken of above took it for granted and then he got rid of her. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 1/28/2008 12:14:37 PM | | Some might be false in there statements others may not be,I know in my profile all is true and meant no games but in my opinion if you don't want to take a chance and find out for real,you snooz you lose. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/7/2008 6:57:24 PM | Being treated like a princess or a goddess would drive me crazy if that was how they wanted to play it all the time.
But maybe one time just as a treat for an evening someone will...just to make me feel special..that would be nice. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 5:36:22 AM | | E.M.E - well, thing is...there's alot of women out there that are under the impression that they think they....themselves....are princesses and/or goddesses, so men respond in kind. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 5:47:19 AM | You know....sweetthang does have a pt.
I have noticed, with all the topics posted here....that people would read something in a profile....and if , "If he or she says this or that, then it's an instant turn-off, and I move onto the next profile!"
Perhaps us singles are misconstuding everything we read...
Granted though, there ARE some OBVIOUS things tha tI have read in profiles that make me think that person has got to be kidding....ie - some arrogant ones.
A GOOD example, sweet....is the women who are "inherently suspicious of a man who says he's a "nice guy"
I remember saying that I was a "nice guy" years ago in a personal ad, and later hear women saying,
"Men who self-proclaim themselves as 'nice guys'...be wary of them!"
Or "Be ware of the 'nice guy' ploy"
Now women are mistrusting of guys saying they are "nice guys"...esp the new men that sign up. And now, typically this is a turn-off for women. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 6:11:41 AM | my profile headline says '"princess fiona' seeks 'shallow hal"' in reference to two movies that i love...........i am not asking to be treated like a princess - i am letting them know i have an ogre side of me lol and shallow hal saw the inner beauty in people not their physical appearance--which in my case is a bbw who is going a little gray.........never even thought someone would look at that and read treat me like a princess----maybe i should change that!
angel kisses
liz | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 6:59:38 AM | I find those goddess/queen claims and promises to be red flags. I don't want to be deferred to, served/waited on, or worshipped. I couldn't respect a man who did everything I said like he didn't have a mind of his own. And I'm all about the respect. I have to respect a man and I want his respect.
If a man (or boy is more like it) says "I treat all my women like a goddess/queen" that ain't even a red flag. It's a raging fire on top of a signal hill surrounded by reflective surfaces and blaring horns. "MY" women?! WTH is he?! Moses?! | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 9:05:41 AM | What is this, Fairytale Land? Nobody should be expected to be treated like royalty unless they really "are" a genuine Queen, King, Prince or Princess, and I highly doubt those types are on here. If there is, 99.9999% of the rest of us wouldn't even pass serious consideration, anyway, so why bother.
Furthermore, I stay away from any woman with the ego and temerity to say upfront they want to be treated like some Queen or Goddess. That tells me right away -- HIGH MAINTENANCE!!! Might as well stamp it on your forehead.
I don't expect to be treated as a King, but as an EQUAL. You want a fairytale romance, rent a Disney movie. | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 9:11:22 AM |
What do you do with those guys that claim they will treat you like A Princess? Or, A Goddess?
'WHAT I think of them' - is One of 2 'things'. Either:
_'Not Much'
*or*
_Ewwwww *creepy* | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 9:36:42 AM | | I think it comes off as insincere. A scripted ploy. Usually when men use language that flowery I get suspicious about their intentions. I guess ultimately I'm suspicious about people who woo that extravegantly out of concern that they are unfamiliar with true attraction and are just kind of mimicking over-the -top romantic declarations from like, bad 80's movies. Also, like others pointed out, it places a woman on a pedestal. Because no one is perfect it leaves us "princesses " to inevitably fall from grace and out of favor. Someone mentioned that these men run the risk of being doormats, but I suspect the opposite. I suspect people who woo this intensely have some issues. As if they're baiting a particular type of woman. A woman who's self esteem is such that she'd need, want, and strive to attain constant affirmation from her partner. A woman who would be much more likely to be convinced that she needs to do whatever it takes to stay in his good graces. I guess when someone says "I'll treat you like a princess" what I hear is, "I expect you to treat me like your knight in shining armor." | |
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| Claiming To Treat You Like A Princess Or Goddess
Posted: 2/8/2008 9:31:53 PM | Soooo concur with Sooooo much of mssg 51.
it places a woman on a pedestal. Because no one is perfect it leaves us "princesses " to inevitably fall from grace and out of favor.
AhhhH HaaaaH! Precisely 'WHY' i so Instantly *cringe* , when i get mssgs of the tone...
"I find you so *Fascinating* / You are so *Interesting* / blah blah buuuhlah"
See, whilst i DO appreciate compliments , AM always ~gracious~ in my 'receiving,acceptance' of such? Well, i so so SO ... HATE it when one comes at me with a tone of being all *twitterpated* by moi. Especially when they have Never Even MET me.
Tis One of the Many Mammoth problems/issues with relationships in This world - in This 'day,age'.
We are ALL the 'same person' , it is ALL the 'same relationship'. Oh, I knooow - 'extreme'
(and, Of Course i am Not 'dismissing Individuality')
Just , it sure does seem , that So Many are constantly , consistantly , ForEver 'Looking For That New,Next Best Thing'. And, Guess WHAT folks? All that *Glitters* is Not Gold.
If one is all twitterpated, expecting AnOther individual to be that 'Magic Fix' for all of THEIR problems, issues, Reasons for 'Failed Relations/Love'? They can 'treat another like a princess , or like a pesky gnat on their picnic lettuce. NM. Neither 'treatment' is going to make THE 'difference'. If expectations are set at an UnRealistic level? SomeOne will AlWays be Disappointed. There are NO 'short cuts' , No 'way around' the WORK , that it Does Take to 'build,maintain' a Relationship , Love, a Connection.
Someone mentioned that these men run the risk of being doormats, but I suspect the opposite.
MayBe , the 'Key Word' (in ^ sentence/statement') IS : 'BeIng'? Whether one IS actually treated as a 'Doormat' / Not? If they have Attempted to 'set some Fairy Tale tone'?
SomeOne is going to end up FEELing like a 'failure'. (or , 'seen' as such)
I guess when someone says "I'll treat you like a princess" what I hear is, "I expect you to treat me like your knight in shining armor."
Or , ... "I expect the Entirety of our experience together to be *ROYAL* , ~magical~ , 'New and Exciting' the whooole time (even When...it is NO longer 'new') , oh so 'Different'
(than Every Other relationship that did NOT 'work out' , Obviously, or we wouldnt' be 'here,now')
Unless one really IS a member of an Official 'Royal Family'? NO good can come of such claims / such treatment.
And, Hey! I am shuuure most can recall 'HOW' one certain Real Princess Was 'Treated'
By HER husbent - no? So, even 'Then' ... | |
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