| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 1/28/2008 6:25:18 PM |
They might be looking at you wierd because they're afraid you have a foot fetish...
Nothing is worse than finding out someone has a foot fetish after/during a foot massage...
IMO, feet are generally gross - ew. If I can stand your feet, you know I'm in love
I second that. | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 1/31/2008 7:05:51 AM | I hear out of most of the male fetishes out there, foot fetishes are the most prevalent. Many men find women's pedicured feet sexy and some men even enjoy sweaty-gym-smelling women's feet sexy. *lol It is a big turn-on for a lot of men. Not all, but a lot.
MistressDolly
the original | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 1/31/2008 7:48:12 AM | Nothing - just try walking without them!
OT:
I got a present from an s/o at a family Christmas. Red high heels, and fishnet stockings.
Arggghhh! At a family gathering? What was he thinking? | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:25:21 PM | Problem may be you talking about it.... Would you bring up a woman's breasts, vagina, butt in normal conversation....???
If a woman's feet are a turn on to you ... great, just include them in your sex play.... but just be natural about it.... most women I know and have dated enjoy having their feet included in sex/sensual play.... but most would also be weirded out by having a conersation about how you are into feet....
and BTW.... I've said this before... feet cannot bew a fetish.... body parts cannot be fetishes... only inanimate objects... if you are into to feet it is no different than being into boobs, butts, legs.....
People need to stop treating feet like some kind of alien appendge.... the entire body can be an erogenous zone....
So remember.... Feet are not gross.... Your feet might be gross ... wash your damn feet
DK | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:29:07 PM | | if a guy has a foot fetish i'm running for sure...thats too weird for me...no one touches my feet without feeling pain after..if he talks like he has one i'll run even faster lol | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:40:03 PM |
BTW.... I've said this before... feet cannot bew a fetish.... body parts cannot be fetishes... only inanimate objects... if you are into to feet it is no different than being into boobs, butts, legs.....
Actually, *anything* can be a fetish, body part or not. A fetish (sexually speaking) is just a fixation on something to the point that it gets you off sexually. Most people simply don't associate fetishes with breasts, legs, butts, etc. because those are the most common areas of the body to be fixated on and people tend to think that a fetish has to be something unusual.
As for the feet... I don't mind touching them (say, while giving a foot massage), but they tend to be unattractive unless the person truly pampers them. I'm not really big on putting my mouth on a body part that spends most of its time in direct contact with the floor or stuffed into a sweaty shoe. I'm also not big on the idea of a man putting his mouth on *my* feet, for exactly those same reasons - along with the fact that it does absolutely nothing for me sexually. *shrug* | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 3:45:36 PM | | I've had the same bozo on here offer himself to "service" my feet on 2 occasions, several months apart. Next time, I will ask him if he'll give me a pedicure. | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 4:35:06 PM | Respnse to MSG 31
Not true... Fetish is a DSM medical term.... as defined ...body parts are NOT fetishes... only inanimate objects.... shoes, stocking, ect can be fetishes but not feet..... If someone can ONLY be aroused by a body part to the exclusion of everything else this is called "Partialism" another DSM medical term.. Partialism is very rare.... and there must be significant impairment in functioning for even that inanimate object to meet the medical criteria of a fetish...
and we don't go around saying someone has a boob fetish because they like boobs... there are only two sexual body parts; the vagina and penis... everything else is just personal preference and turn ons
Our common use of the term fetish is not accurate | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 8:08:00 PM | The DSM definition you're referring to is talking about to the medical disorder of Fetishism, which, yes, is focused on inanimate objects. HOWEVER a fetish can be absolutely anything. I can have a fetish for gerbils, and be fascinated with them. Fetishism (the actual disorder) is when you actually require whatever it is that you're fascinated with in order to achieve sexual satisfaction. Say, if I need a glove to get off. Is Partialism the technical term for a fetish that's specific towards a human part? Sure. But that's not to say that a person can't *have* a fetish for a particular body part. NOT the same thing.
Edit: Sorry, edited for clarification; I think I deleted the middle chunk of what I wrote, but have no freakin' clue how I did it, lol | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 8:35:43 PM | Jeeze, I *still* don't think that's clear, so let me paraphrase: Fetishism is inanimate and Partialism is human, but guess what? They're just specific types of fetishes. That's all I was trying to say, is that they're just fancy medical terms for a type of fetish. So for someone to say have "I have a foot fetish" is completely fine.
Think about it - would you stop a person who said they had cancer and correct them by saying, "You don't have Cancer, you have Leukemia?" | |
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Bunked
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Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 36 | |
| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 9:07:02 PM | | I myself think that I have a foot fetish, I don't think I fully realized that until all these websites came around. I have never admitted to it because even though I like to look at womens feet I still think it's strange myself and can't explain why I find it attractive. I kind of wonder why do they bother getting pedicures and stuff like that if they just see that body part as a utility. Whats the difference from a guy looking at a girls breasts and looking at her feet. They are both body parts. And both supposed to be non sexual. I can't help it myself, I don't know why it turns me on but it does. And it seems to be fairly common as well. Just nobody will admit to it. | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 9:36:15 PM | I turned off my IM (except for people on my fav list) after a window opened and the first sentence I saw was "I bet even your toes taste well."
Whereas I like the way my red nail polish looks in open toe shoes (hey, Yapple... wasss up?), this is not a way to start a conversation, methinks.
No, it was not OP.
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 9:49:30 PM | | One look at Uma Thurman's feet in 'Kill Bill' is enough to kill any fetish. So unappetizing. Don't know why they didn't use a foot double there. | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 9:56:29 PM |
I want to know wether girls think feet are important or not?
I sometimes feel many folks here need them for Higher Math....like making change for a twenty. | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 9:58:05 PM |
eeze, I *still* don't think that's clear, so let me paraphrase: Fetishism is inanimate and Partialism is human, but guess what? They're just specific types of fetishes. That's all I was trying to say, is that they're just fancy medical terms for a type of fetish. So for someone to say have "I have a foot fetish" is completely fine.
Think about it - would you stop a person who said they had cancer and correct them by saying, "You don't have Cancer, you have Leukemia?"
Precisely.
:)
MistressDolly | |
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Mulva
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Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 41 | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/1/2008 10:15:00 PM |
I sometimes feel many folks here need them for Higher Math
I mostly use mine for walking... But, here's an idea worth exploring.
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 4:20:47 AM | Response to Msg/34/35/40
Yes it is a medical definition... a "medical" term... but like many medical terms it has been adopted by the larger culture at at times inaccurately and with negative associations...
Partialism does not equal a foot fetish.... for something to meet the criteria of "partialsm" it has to be an EXCLUSIVE focus on that body part.... meaning that is the sole (no pun intended LOL) focus of the persons sexual arousal....
I read some stats that said their are over 68 million folks with a foot fetish(laymans definition of a fetish) that is a big group... In fact one of the reasons the DSM came up with the catagory of partialism is because they realized there was tremendous variation in what what "normal" sexual expression turn ons to people.... that just liking or being turned on by a particular body part is not abnormal.
So there are alot of people who are into feet.... 68 million if the stats are accurate.. and that is probably an underestimation .
By calling something a fetish it makes it taboo, patholizes it, and leads to feelings of shame and guilt... which then leeds to folks going underground, trying to hide or repress it, which then leads to creepy or dysfunctional expression (such a what the poster wrote in Msg 32) . I do alot of couples and sex therapy in my practice and a big part of my focus ends up addressing people's shame and guilt about their sexuality.... We have one one body, loaded with nerve endings, and we are tactile beings, we are sensual/sexual beings..... we need to be normalizing sexual expression... not contribuing to someone's feelings that something is wrong with them ... That's why I told the OP just be natural about including your partner's feet into whatever else you do sexually together
So being attracted or turned on or including a body part in your sexual/sensual routine does not mean you have a fetish....
Feet are a legitimate body part.... For thousands of years cultures who put high value on good hygiene have recognized the erotic and sensual nature o feet.... Positions for "toe sucking" are mentioned in the Kara Sutra, we have the ancient science of reflexology, ect.... Again liking feet is no different than liking boobs or a butt.... these are not sexual body parts.. but they have been "culturally sanctioned" as legimate, but the entire body is/can be an erogenous zone... When we start trying to say.. this body part counts... but this body part is out.... this can lead to feelings of guilt and shame in another person who may like that body part
So if someone does not like their feet included in sex play that is fine... but catagorizing someone who is into feet as weird, or having a fetish is not accurate....
feet are no grosser than any other body parts... epsecially parts we regularly put into our mouths during sex... If good hygine is followed feet are not dirty, smelly or gross... I regularly include my Gfs (clean)feet in our sex play .... Now would I go near them if they weren't clean.. ??? . hell no... !!! the same way I would not engage in oral sex if someone(or myself) were not clean...
BTW... the mouth is tthe dirtiest/ most bacteria ridden part of the human body...
So there are folks who may have partialism for feet... but that is rare , but the run of the mill perosn who just likes feet does not have a fetish, nor tdo they have partialism....
DK | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 9:20:28 AM | Again, the word "fetish" is not a medical term. Obsessive behavior isn't even all that that word refers to, so to try and claim it's a strictly medical term is completely false. What you're going into, with Fetishism and Partialism, yes, those are medical terms, but they were created to describe *extremes* in fetishist behavior. So to tell people that they're using "fetish" incorrectly because they use it in reference to anything else amounts to elitist bull, because it's certainly quite possible to have a fetish without it being some debilitating thing for which I need to seek therapy.
If you *prefer* that people not use the word "fetish" because you feel that it implies a taboo or "feelings of guilt and shame" then that's your preference, or perhaps the preference of people in your particular specialty (sex therapist?). Perhaps you've found it to be a more positive therapeutic experience for your patients when you make that differentiation. However, that doesn't make your preference the end-all-be-all by any means. | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 9:38:12 AM | DK:
A passing dissertation to the misinformed:
A fetish encompasses both objects and body parts. It even includes abstract concepts, since a fetish is born (and evolves) in that amorphus place between mind and body.
To set the record straight, anything can be fetishized. That is to say, anything can be given a focused degree of desire for sexual or spiritual gratification. Those who don't believe that assume much and imagine little.
A note about the DSM: The DSM has made changes and continues to do so classifying and describing sadomasochistic behavior. The DSM (American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders-DSM IV) no longer considers BDSM as necessarily pathological. This alone shows us it's not some sort of divine and final authority on the subject at hand.
Mistress Dolly | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 10:06:40 AM | lol, I don't think anything at all about feet, and girls my age seem to think they're gross. But last summer i was working on the tundra and my crew had a 40 something year old female cook. My feet would get soaked every day, so I'd take off my shoes/socks before heading into the supper tent, and they'd get all dirty and gross on the way in.
One day she was like 'I love your feet, they are very beautiful". And they were all dirty and grungy. I think she was coming onto me...lol | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 12:43:52 PM | I would love to have studied chiropody - just think how satisfying it must be to treat someone's feet so they can walk away with no pain.
Pam xx | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 2:15:26 PM | Response to MSG 44
The word fetish IS a medical term... the DSM is a medical manual... infact identifying and classifying sexual" fetishes" originated in the field of psychiatry/psychology.... So if you have an altenate use of the word that is fine...(such as in a fetish club) but the term foot fetish originated in that field...
And missfdolly you are correct... as the field gained a better understanding of human sexuality they realized that being turned on by a particular body part is not a mental disorder, a fetish, or partialism.... unless specific criteria are met.... that the range of sexual expression in varied.... so they became more accepting.... hence body parts were dropped from the DSM as a fetish....
So again.. if you have an alternate definition that is fine.. but that does not negate the medical definition from which the term originated..... And.... by your definition any guy that likes a woman's breast has a breast fetish or a woman who gets turned on by a guy with a riped stomach or a big biceps has a fetish.... I don't think most guys would consider their liking the female breast as a fetish... they would say that is just normal senxuality.... feet, legs, butts, ears.... are no different
Somehow I don't think that captures what you are referring to as a fetish...
nor does it capture what the OP is getting at ... He likes a womans feet and his need to bring this up in conversation is backfiring on him...
If he could just chill and introduce his interest in the bedroom he may have a better response... as many woman enjoy having their enjoy having their feet included in their sex play....
DK | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 3:12:15 PM | The word fetish IS a medical term... the DSM is a medical manual...
Aside from the fact that the entry you keep pointing to is a definition for the syndrome of Fetishism (and not a general description of what a fetish is), I'd like to point out that simply because a word is used in a medical manual does not make it a medical term. That kind of thinking has so many flaws I don't even know where to begin.
infact identifying and classifying sexual" fetishes" originated in the field of psychiatry/psychology.... So if you have an altenate use of the word that is fine...(such as in a fetish club) but the term foot fetish originated in that field...
Identifying and classifying types of behavior is one thing, but inventing the term "fetish" and its meaning is something entirely different and did *not* originate in the field of psychology. Identifying and treating types and levels of fear is a psychological pursuit as well, but that doesn't make "fear" a medical term, and it doesn't mean psychologists invented fear, either. If you want to get technical about it, the etymology of the word and its meanings were developed well before psychologists got their hands on it and decided to classify the fetishes they observed (when the idea of Fetishism began to be introduced). Again, that does not in any way mean that a person can't use the word "fetish" to describe their fixation on something and, again, if that's what you prefer to do in your practice, that's *your* preference. However, it does not make that usage of the word the only correct one, and it doesn't mean that others are incorrect in using the word in a more general manner.
by your definition any guy that likes a woman's breast has a breast fetish or a woman who gets turned on by a guy with a riped stomach or a big biceps has a fetish.... I don't think most guys would consider their liking the female breast as a fetish...
Considering your earlier statement that the only sexual parts of the human body are the penis and vagina, I'm not sure why you would then turn around and say that a strong preference for any body part that's not the penis or vagina *couldn't* be a fetish. Commonality does not mean something can't be a fetish. By that same token, merely liking something is not indicative of a fetish, either. It is, by definition, a fixation. Therefore, if a man insists that all his dates have large breasts, that to me would indicate a fetish. If a woman has special obsession with high heeled shoes, that would indicate to me a shoe fetish, and so on. If it's common for men to have an obsession (not just a vague liking) for legs, is it really fair to say that it's no longer an obsession because it's common? What you seem to be trying to say is that a person can't have a fetish unless it's a severe disorder or something uncommon. I think that your need to reassure your patients of their normality is clouding your judgement on this issue, and I think the *real* misperception is that the object of the fetish has to be something outrageous when it really doesn't. Perhaps letting them know that having a fetish is normal, and not making the *object* of said fetish the real issue might be a better tack? I'm not a psychologist, so I can't be the judge of that.
nor does it capture what the OP is getting at ...
I don't recall being the one who decided to make a point of announcing the correct/incorrect usage of the word "fetish;" that was your own detour into the land of irrelevance. I merely stated the fact that you are wrong. *shrug* But it's all good. Lively discussion is what makes the world go round. | |
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| Whats wrong with feet.
Posted: 2/2/2008 8:15:42 PM | | Hmmmm the people on here that are dissing OP's foot thang....have also said they will be grossed out by ugly feet so to a point feet come into it I guess......I would describe my feet as an asset, as far as feet go, they have been complimented as "nice looking feet" (??!!) but more so for me I like 'em for their ability to get me from a to b.... | |
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