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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 3:27:10 AM | maybe if you thought about it, you would
The only reason so many gay men approach me is because I don't give off the "ew your gay vibe, go away"
I treat them exactly as I would any other person and they mistake that behavior as me being gay as well. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 4:07:47 AM | | I take my comment back. Looks like there is still plenty of hate to keep the world spinning and it's no wonder you want to hide your true self. The year is 2008 but the minds are still in 1950. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 10:06:15 AM | its not for me..i cant even eat hot dogs without a knife and fork.. bananas too...
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 10:50:18 AM | "The only reason so many gay men approach me is because I don't give off the "ew your gay vibe, go away""
If they are groping you when they approach you then no your not giving off that vibe. They are just F-ing with you for the most part I think.
You are not a tolerant person either. How does it effect your life if someone was gay? why should the gene have to die out?
At least be all the way honest in it rather than try to say your tolerant. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 11:48:14 AM | I don't agree with anything that is kept secret in a relationship, especially living on the DL...That is a pretty big thing...for if you happen to catch something and give it to her then I guess it won't be much of a secret anymore will it??
I don't disagree with men sleeping with men at all...But doing it this way, is no way to go about it. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 12:38:28 PM | I have been in a few work environments that seemed to have a lot of homosexuals (or at least Out people). One of my (flaming) co-workers said that he was weirded out by me, because I was totally comfortable hanging out with him, but didn't register on his gaydar. "Oh, that's because I'm straight." "Huh. You know we're all gay, right?" "What's your point?" None of my gay associates ever groped me. It's very possible to not have an "ew you're gay" vibe, without having an "I must be gay!" vibe.
Hey, when it comes to Homosexuality, it's the Squeeky Wheel that wants to get Greased. 
As for the OP... I just don't get it. Looks like you're pretty much gay to the core. Big Deal. If you want to stay in the closet because there are intolerant people who might attack you verbally or physically, I can understand that. If you're saying that you're actually straight but sleep with men... I can't understand that. Straight men don't have sex with other men. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 12:52:45 PM | i see nothing wrong with being bisexual or gay if that is your true nature, but what makes me sad is that you are living a 'secret' life by living on the DL , therefore living a lie.....and how can that be healthy for you long term or the women you meet if you feel you have to lie to them about your true self.....
society is a lot less ignorant these days and more accepting of other people's sexual orientation....why not embrace who you are and stop the b*llshit now before others get hurt from your deception, and before it takes it's toll on you too..... | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 1:31:39 PM | well personally i got a couple of opinions on this post... first off i dont really agree with the whole adam and steve, eve and ellen thing anywayz... i dont hate those people, and if it came up id probly befriend some gay dudes if they knew there boundaries and were hilarious ha.
that one guy talking about the whole same sex,sex generation dying out, everything would be alot more simple if that did happend....anyway though, look dude, like everyone knows, the whole girl on girl thing is very popular, hell i think my grandmother is a lesbian(lo, ewe), but if they wanna go around holding hands and all in public(which was made popular by men all these days praising the girl on girl thing, that and treatin woman badly, reap what u sew now) then u should be as adamant and open about urself too, theres always gonna be someone who disagrees, but whatever | |
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real12
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Joined: 12/31/2007
Msg: 35 | |
| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 1:40:18 PM | Ermm, pardon my ignorance, but uh, why would you want to sleep with a man?....or better yet, under what sort of circumstances would you find yourself sleeping with a man if your not gay?
I mean, unless your a victim of some strange plane crash in the middle of some frigid Alpine territory, standing about naked with your clothes burned off with nary a woman to warm yourself against, what would be the purpose?.....& even then....even then in such a situation, I might very well ponder just sayin "f*ck it! my ass is just gonna go freeze myself to death with my hand around my c*ck, cum frozen in mid air with some deep eternal bliss knowing that in the end I was thinking of 'her' & died a noble orgasmic death".......
I guess I don't get the question.......sorry. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 1:42:50 PM |
so as a matter of fact i live on the DL...its ok for women in society to sleep with both men and women but not socially acceptable for men thus leaving us to do our activities in secret....
Well, woman having "sex" with other woman is one thing. Men do happen to like seeing girl on girl action. But as far as women being bi-sexual, it is not really socially acceptable. For instance, I have a hard time admitting that I want to get into a relationship with a female, for the same reasons you are affraid to admit to your loved ones that you bang men.
BUT, I dont have sex with women, because I am not looking for straight sex with no strings. It sounds like you are looking for sex with men, but not love, am I right? Well, there you go, why would society accept that? And it also sounds like the reason you are leading a secret lifestyle is because you are ashamed of yourself. And wanting to be in a straight relationship while having sex with men IS something to be ashamed of.
Being bi-sexual means being able to love both genders. Being gay means loving the same sex. And both of them are socially accpetable right now. You can thank all of the gay guys before you who fought for rights for you. Gayness is so common now, I dont know where you are getting your ideas from. OH yea, you just want NSA sex with men. Well, good luck getting society to accept that.
And most woman who have sex with other women who aren't bi-sexual, do it to for attention from men, so thank your fellow man for making it so socially acceptable. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 8:49:28 PM | Men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle are often referred to as "Men utilizing Beards". The female is the "Beard"....
I have heard that this often happens in cases like the military, when an officer does not dare have it be known that they are homosexual. They will retain a wife to keep "appearances". Often this wife has no clue about the man's sexual predelection.
It is unfortunate. And unfair to the woman.
As for homophobes that feel it is necessary to say cruel and dehumanizing statements about people who have sexual preferences that do not match their own, I believe this is merely a sign of insecurity in their own sexuality. I have yet to meet a truly manly man who has any issue with a gay person.
I have to wonder what sort of situation a "straight" man would be in where a gay man would just walk up out of nowhere and begin "fondling the straight man's genitals". That would seem a bit suicidal to me...unless, of course....the straight man was hanging out in a gay bar.......... | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 9:03:03 PM | One problem with this, OP, is that your lifestyle can unwittingly expose an innocent woman to HIV. Another very real consideration is the ethics. Obviously, you're cheating on the girl if she doesn't know you're queer on the side.
As alluded to in above posts, this *ALWAYS* comes to a sad ending, often 20 years into a marriage/hetero rel'shp. Two schoolage chums had this happen where their Dads came out of the closet after the kids were in college, and it was brutally devastating to the whole family unit.
My suggestion is that you seek therapy for your gheyness or failing that, be more honest with your partners. Who knows, maybe she wants another stiff one in the sac along with you, in which case, *bonus*, right ? | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 9:16:07 PM |
My suggestion is that you seek therapy for your gheyness or failing that, be more honest with your partners. Who knows, maybe she wants another stiff one in the sac along with you, in which case, *bonus*, right ?
I highly doubt, IMO, that he wants her anywhere near him while he is enjoying his gay sex. It's not like the 2 stiff ones would be there to do her, they would be there to do each other. She may never look at him the same if he sucks the other guys****the way he likes to.
Sad, Sad, Sad. Why not just forget women altogether OP? Do us a favor. But then again, the Gay society probably wont want you either. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 9:17:18 PM | so what, your straight?............ your gay?.......... your bisexual?
seems to me the over all problem with this whole scenario is.............. you live on the "DL" <--- sexual orientation does not affect basic morality IMO..... if you can't straight up confess to chicks that you indeed like to taste the odd lolipop and thus decieve them by omission, then your a game player "straight" up
perhaps it's more the fact that your "DL" "MO" seems to be the true appeal here?......... sooooooooooooooooooo naughty, sooooooooooooo fun ? | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/11/2008 9:22:06 PM | Brilliant Passion: The American Psychological Association (and Canadian P.A.) haven't considered homosexuality to be a disorder in over 30 years. Also, although HIV initially spread like wildfire in the gay community, that's just not "so" anymore. Having said that... I don't disagree that the OP could use some therapy to help him deal with his self esteem or denial issues. I'm also not "inspired with confidence" that he'll make safe sex choices, but just being Gay (even on the DL) doesn't make him a particular risk for HIV.
Bethlett: Oddly enough, I have also been able to 'hang out' at a gay bar without being hit on or groped by gay men. Admittedly, I stayed very close to the women who dragged me there. I didn't disagree with anything you said, mind you... just expanding on it. I don't think there are many straight men that would just grab a woman, probably the same thing can be said of gay men (but with respect to grabbing men). | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/12/2008 6:00:47 AM | There is nothing wrong with being gay or bisexual but your female partner deserves to know you sleep with other men. The transmission rate of HIV is higher upon homosexual men than it is heterosexuals because of the nature of anal sex. (Not to say heterosexuals don't practice anal sex either).
Because of this information, she deserves to make an informed decision...... | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/12/2008 6:46:46 AM |
everyone sees many problems with this but i (who practice this) see nothing wrong... so as a matter of fact i live on the DL...its ok for women in society to sleep with both men and women but not socially acceptable for men thus leaving us to do our activities in secret....there r many views on this and i appreciate all opinions.
WTF is a "straight lifestyle?"
You're bisexual and you're not letting your partner(s) (I'm assuming the female partners,at least) know this fact.
You obviously have issues w/ this...otherwise you'd let the female partners know about this fact upfront and let them decide if they want to continue w/ you.
You need to sit down and assess the consequences of your behavior and the potential harm to others that it may cause.
If you can't see where the harm would outweigh the benefits, then perhaps you need to seek serious psychological assistance. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/12/2008 7:12:52 AM | You're in the closet, if you are comfortable there, don't want the world to know, stay there.
If you feel like a hypocrite, and aren't ashamed of your life style come on out.
Now if you are a flaming queen and don't want the ridicule just tone it down. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/12/2008 7:30:28 AM | "men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
everyone sees many problems with this but i (who practice this) see nothing wrong... so as a matter of fact i live on the DL...its ok for women in society to sleep with both men and women but not socially acceptable for men thus leaving us to do our activities in secret....there r many views on this and i appreciate all opinions. "
I don't care if someone is openly gay or hides it as long as they don't hurt anyone with what they are doing or try to force their life style on others. To each their own. But I don't think that was the point of starting this thread, now was it?
pssssssst if this was "secret" it isn't anymore since you put it on the internet.
You asked for opinions and here is mine. 
My opinion is it wasn't a secret and you did this just to see how many guys would contact you which is trolling or could it be that this is just a hoax. | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/12/2008 7:33:40 AM | | As much as you can try and lead a straight life the fact remains that sleeping with both sexes your bi sexual not straight, so just class yourself as you are for starters as its when someone says theyre straight but hey i sleep with guys that they will laugh and think what an idiot when if you just state as you are its not looked upon as anything but normal | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/12/2008 7:42:46 AM | | I think it's important and good for your mental stability if you embrace exactly who you are and what you choose to do. Never worry about what others think and be free to be you! Play safe! | |
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| men who sleep with men but live a straight lifestyle
Posted: 2/17/2008 8:29:38 AM |
everyone sees many problems with this but i (who practice this) see nothing wrong... so as a matter of fact i live on the DL...its ok for women in society to sleep with both men and women but not socially acceptable for men thus leaving us to do our activities in secret....there r many views on this and i appreciate all opinions.
Ok, this is my problem with it. I have lots of gay friends, and I love them. I know that they sleep with men, and they are open about it, so so does the world. I am bisexual, and I have slept with women in the past. All of my (male) lovers have known this. However, the situation you describe, the DL, is completely different because it is SECRET. You say you see nothing wrong with it; why do you hide it?
There are too many diseases-AIDS being the scariest-that are transmitted through unsafe sex with multiple partners. The truth is, gay men have more sex than anyone on this planet. I don't know for sure, but my guess is that bisexual men are right up there with them. The difference is, bisexual sex between two men has the potential to be much riskier because of the "ACTIVITIES IN SECRET" part. How fair is it for your female partner to be kept in the dark about a situation that potentially puts her health at risk? Not to mention the damage cheating alone causes, whether the partner is a member of the opposite or same sex.
Society is changing. It is much more socially acceptable for men to sleep with other men now, and, you'd be surprised, there are far more many women then you would imagine that would be completely down for a MMF threesome, or who are open minded enough to not mind that you like to sleep with men as much as you like to sleep with them. You are right on this count; women have been doing it for years and most men find it a turn on. Try being honest with your partners and yourself, to keep everyone SAFE, and you may be surprised-your girl might be much more into the idea than you think. And if not, find someone who is. You don't want the guilt of someone's broken heart-or fate of their health-in your hands. | |
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