| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/8/2008 10:06:06 AM |
Typical female reaction to this.
But men can have kids until they are very old , wome ncant and this makes them bitter
We hear of the occassional man of 70, etc. years of age fathering kids... just as we hear of the women at the same age giving birth. These are rare that the kids are genetically healthy. Not the norm.
There is a clear cut good reason why men should not father children after the age of even 40. A woman's egg viability decreases... yes,.. but, here's what many do not know... a man's sperm deterioates at a faster rate at an earlier age. Older sperm... men over the age of 35 run a high risk of transmitting many genetic negative effects upon their kids. Autism being one that is showing up more and more where the father is over the age of 35 and the mother is still below the age of 35.
There are many physical and mental disabilities that sperm of men over the age of 35 causes.
Thing is it has been very unPC (politically correct) and a Social taboo to bring these aspects into the public eye. But, it's coming out more and more. Especially now and think what will be when all these men who waited to have kids, due to careers, etc. get women pregnant in today's age... think of how many more children will be burdened with these ailments in years to come.
This was known in the Research Community... of which I was a part... at a major University (UAB). I'm sure it can be 'googled' .... just make sure you go to reputable unbiased sites to obtain the info. | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/8/2008 10:12:25 AM | It must be a _Really_ Short List..!!!
I thought that I was done with newborns till my 2nd wife {at 42}
gave me the news about our Son...!!
Now...I'm _Certain_ of It..!!
Two Loving People . . Sharing their lives . . is all I'm looking forward to, now . . !!
. .     . . | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/8/2008 1:08:35 PM |
well by the time the kid is grown the dad will look like the Crypt keeper
I never realized looks had anything to do with being a good dad at any age,, nor did I know that loving a child at any age had anything to do with looks... | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/8/2008 1:14:53 PM | I think some just like to hear the patter of little feet runing thru the house and the draw back to being young a youngster brings... However I don't have children and am at the age for me I'd rather not start a young family or raise someone else's young kids...
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/8/2008 4:20:00 PM | Easyoneverything (in Msg #13) said:
I have a feeling it might be related to the limited options we have under this heading in our profiles. I'm a 50+ woman & have no intention of having any more babies, but it's reasonable to assume that any man my age is going to have children (presumably adult or close to it) that are part of his family. In that case, I don't have any objections. I did run across a man who was in his mid-50's w/a young (8 yr old) son & that's a deal breaker for me. My children are raised & leaving or have left the nest & I'm looking forward to reclaiming my adult life, not helping someone raise their youngster. Some might consider that selfish, but to me it's no different than people on here who are avid skiers or roller-bladers. They want someone to share that activity & have every right to that. It won't be me, but that's ok.
My Perspective:
1st off I tend to agree with Easyoneverything in 1 respect … that some confusion has been casued by the limited number of choices provided for the question “Do You Want Children?” The choices are:
- Prefer Not To Say
- Want Children
- Does Not Want Children
- Undecided/Open
In respect to the OP, I can understand why she would question why men over the age of 50 would be interested in fathering children. However, as Easyoneverything suggested … I can also understand why some men over 50 would want everyone to know that they would welcome getting involved with a lady that already has children of her own (regardless of their age) & be a positive influence on those children. For that reason I chose the “Undecided/Open” answer.
I have a 28 yr old daughter & a 25 yr old son who I am very proud of &d love with all my heart. Raising my children & being involved in their lives is something I miss very much. It’s right up there with playing competitive sports & making moves for the advancement in my career. However I also realize that my age does provide limitations on me … especially on the competitive sports. Lol
These days there are so many children & young adults (for that matter) who lack a mother or father that they approach to ask for advice & guidance. If an opportunity arose for me to get involved with a lady a few years younger than me who still had teenagers or young adults living with them … I certainly would not consider that a deal buster. In fact in some respects I might even welcome the opportunity to provide a positive influence on these young people.
Just my 2 cents …
Gary | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/12/2008 6:50:24 PM | It's called a mid-life crisis They just want to prove they are as good at 50 as they were at 30! | |
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| well, I'd say that is a little strong>>>
Posted: 5/21/2008 4:53:36 PM | Seeign how I took over Eddie Shores ' record for 'fast league suspensions",I can express strong opinions myself!
OK, I just turned 52, & for the first time in my life, the hammer drum beat to have a child has sounded.
In the past, I have faced economic & job challenges, which precluded the attempt. My ex had a history of miscarriages, & after two we – just stopped trying, Then the marriage ‘miscarried.’ & yes, I raised her child.
Now that those hurdles are surmounted, I feel the need. for a loving marriage with a child of my own.
The VEDAS say that ‘UNTIL WE FEEL THE NEED, NO NEED EXISTS’. All needs are personal, & the difficulty of the “Christian ethic, unmodified’ in some faiths is the desire to pigeonhole everyone.
As an older man, I realize that I have to cast further field, & the internet makes this possible. Yet, if a woman forms a loving relationship that includes heir’s, & possibly one other, with a stable, caring man, - what of it? I counsel many homeless / broken home families without any resources, & I hardly see that as ‘better.’
Therefore, I hire a hockey coach, & teach my child golf.
Therefore, he /she now get to attend a better private school.
Therefore, I follow in the footsteps of Pierre Trudeau (sired at 74a0 or Moses (sired at 120!!!, According to Talmud….
Or ‘ABE”
“Abe, sixty five year old Wealthy new father, exposes his child to sex education:
“SO THAT, MY SON is how a baby is made!
Edgar, Celeste, you may now resume your normal duties…”
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| You can have your sperm lab tested...
Posted: 5/21/2008 5:11:07 PM | The research into deteriorated sperm is rather suspect.
It became the ‘new cachet’ in the 1980-‘s & like the ‘male menopause’, sold a heck of a lot of books.
The risk factor has to be quantified. By real statistical analysis. Yes, the risk of schizophrenia increases by 40 %, the quantitative effect is a shift form 0.4 % to .56% of the birth population. I am not sure of the true aggregate quantitative shift- if someone has a verified figure from a trusted source, pleas post it…
Birth defects are more likely to be caused by chemicals men are exposed to in certain blue-collar professions- heartbreaking as this is. | |
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| Thank you Urbanessa!
Posted: 5/21/2008 5:42:23 PM | Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 2/20/2008 3 52 PM
because they are retarded what else could it be?
+...Is that what they taught you at "How to become a total b*tch"-school?
Clearly, as a self-proclaimed "social worker" you should be able to use a term like "retarded" in a more sensitive way. ...."
Itwqould nice to get these debates back to 'ladies & gentlemen,' rather than yowling & hissing scrathing & dissing sessions... | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/21/2008 7:51:01 PM |
Can someone explain to me, why would men over 50 who already have children would like to have more children? It realy puzzled me... don't you know (they know) that this is a 20 year contract and more than likely will be dead before their child reach the age of maturity.
Sure! As soon as you explain to me why a women over 50 wants a LTR with a man and expects to him to comfort her until she dies, when on average men live much shorter lives and women marry men that are older than themselves....
....so even if this new hubby lives an average lifespan, he will die 10 years before you, meaning you will have to go get another hubby for the next 10 years (assuming HE lives), and so forth.
So why are you so picky about finding someone who gonna live FOREVER? Do you demand the same from pets, whom you know will only live less than 15 years, die and are replaced? | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/21/2008 8:06:24 PM | Maybe someone should tell Madonna to stop adopting kids. She will be 70 when her newest crop are in diapers, and who will change their diapers when she's doing her 50th Anniversary Virgin tour....????
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/21/2008 8:15:49 PM | I don't have a problem with men over 50 wanting children. But I do think they should be very financially secure if they go out on that limb. I'm not saying the rich should have more perquisites than the poor. I'm saying that taking on parenthood is a big commitment, and if you aren't sure you can stay the course, you can at least have the decency to provide for your offspring.
One of my best (guy) friends from college didn't have a child until approximately 50. I'm sure he will be an exceptional parent. I suspect the child will be an exceptional child. | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/21/2008 8:34:07 PM | I don't see any reason for a man to not have a child at 50. Although it may be freaking to us aging men and women who may be ready for a nursing home, obviously to him it is worth it.
And its a stupid assumation that he has nothing to provide to his kids because he can't roll on the floor with them, that's why beds are there for. I'm willing to bet he would be a better parent then most 20 something yr olds or even women who have consistently felt the need to "gift" the jerks they got pregnant from. So he's in his 70s when the kid is 18, so what...I really don't think kids really care about that anymore than they care about skin colour unless we point it out. Kids are narcissitic...if they're loved and secure they love you unconditionally...this is why we must become like them in order to enter the kingdom of heaven. They feel love and see love and know without a doubt that their parents love them.
My grandmother had my mother at 52, the last of 12, she lived to be 89 whereas my mother lived to 38 and I was 17. Whose to say when death will come. All you can do is teach by example because no matter what age you die, you want to be able to know that the little time you did have with your kids, lasted them a lifetime and love, that will always stay with your kid.
Women were not made the same and having reading these posts on here, I can see why. Why would a kid want a mother with a bad attitude anyway. It seems like fathers are more laid back in their parenting skills, I know my dad was after my mother's death. They really don't sweat the big stuff or the small. So I say, if you want to procreate at any age, do it with the eye single to being the best hands on parent you can be. Those lessons stay with your kid even if you don't get to see them graduate from high school. | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 5/22/2008 9:23:26 PM | I think older men still want to prove that they still can. How ever I don't think that the woman who's biological clock is ticking wants an older guy. Raising a child is a group effort, and a 18yr+ commitment.
I can't have any more children and I do not want to raise anymore ,I want to enjoy the years to come and look forward to grandchildren.
If a man in his 50's wants to spend his older years with the stress and all the work involved with raising a child at that age more power to him. | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 6/19/2008 8:07:58 AM | | Sounds like it would be a bad idea (according to studies of birth defects), for an older woman and an older man to have a child, because it could be short, mentally retarded, and mentally ill......yikes!!!!!!!!!!! And these things NEVER happen with young parents, right? | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 6/19/2008 5:07:50 PM | I just had to share this. I thought I had heard it all but then this popped in to my in-box on another site. This man is 66 and you just have to laugh
You did not reply to my last mail & that was understadable. I told you that I had five daughters & no son. My wife is sick & at her age she can not give me son. I divorced her to find woman who can give me a son. But because of my age, no body is willing to accept my proposal including you. You are at the age that you can have baby. My proposal is: Why not we come together for about six months & try for a baby? If it is son, I adopt him. If it's a girl you have her. You don't have any child, so you will be happy to have a girl. If we fail to produce any result, we part. No obligations on any bodie's part. I am serious. Please do write. If you don't like the idea, say trash; and I don't write to yoi again. | |
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| WOW......
Posted: 6/22/2008 11:48:12 PM | Close to 66, close to illiterate!
I have a vision of the letterwriter pecking out that missive , single finger, brow furrowed in fierce determination...
In the final analysis- if you don't believe in older men having children- don't marry them.
It's THAT simple... | |
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| WOW......
Posted: 6/23/2008 5:26:06 AM | It seems to be ok when older celebreties have kids but when normal people do, it's weird??? Today's technology is allowing even older women to have children And if someone wants to have children later in life, let them. Nobody's business but their own. For those interested there is a site called Mothers Over 40. Just google it. Very positive stories.  | |
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| WOW......
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:37:33 AM | Like my mother always says
What you eat don't make me fat
I would love to see some of these people that want babies so bad to consider adopting and not just babies ...but take an older kid or a child with challenges.
If you have the time and the money to show some real love do it for a kid that never got a real chance to have a great life | |
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| WOW......
Posted: 6/23/2008 7:35:55 AM |
I would love to see some of these people that want babies so bad to consider adopting and not just babies ...but take an older kid or a child with challenges.
If you have the time and the money to show some real love do it for a kid that never got a real chance to have a great life
I did just that, at age 42,, now my son is 8, with a disability,,, life couldn't be better... | |
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| WOW......
Posted: 6/23/2008 7:59:50 AM |
So he's in his 70s when the kid is 18, so what...I really don't think kids really care about that ...
I can dispute that. I am a child of an "older" father, 60 when I was born and 72 when the youngest was born. My father was in great health for his age but he was still an old man. He didn't do the things with us that younger fathers do, he left most of the stuff up to my mom (besides the disipline and paying bills) and he just didn't have the energy to do everything we would have liked him to do with us. Yes, we were secure in the fact that he loved us, and yes, he took care of the "basic stuff". But there needs to be more. We did feel like we missed out in some ways and there were times we wished our dad was "like everyone else's". There is definitely a limit where you need to say it's too late to produce a baby.... However, it might not be too late to adopt an older child, and I personally think that shows more love for children than being obsessed with a child having your own DNA does (in fact, that is a bit more self-love than any other kind of love). | |
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| Men over 50 wanting children
Posted: 6/27/2008 1:38:45 PM | MSG#1,Candylane wrote:Can someone explain to me, why would men over 50 who already have children would like to have more children? It realy puzzled me... don't you know (they know) that this is a 20 year contract and more than likely will be dead before their child reach the age of maturity. And how much can you really contribute to the child at that age when they are going through a life change themselves?
I have a brother that is 51 and a younger half brother that is 18. Our dad is 73 and I can tell you that the little brother had a lot better child hood growing up under dad through his late 50's on through his 60's and now into his 70's than me and the older brother did growing up under him being in his 20's and 30's. So I'd say in our case the dad has more to offer in his late 50's 60's and early 70's than he did in his 20's and 30's . So why not have kids when your older? Was better for little bro than it was for me and big bro ! | |
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