| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/28/2008 7:05:32 PM | | I was told by a elderly neighbor years ago that "If you keep your woman happy, then she will try all the harder to keep you happy"...If a woman wants a massage from me, she doesnt have to ask twice. As long as that feeling runs both ways. | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/28/2008 7:44:46 PM | | I used to give massages to my grandma and father. I even gave message for a woman I dated. She eventually complained, so I stopped. I guess you're make a woman happy either way they complain? | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/28/2008 11:22:53 PM | you have to have had a great one to be able to give a great one,
i love them
doesnt have to be sexual , but i think that close contact always has some sexual feeling to it, in fact i know a young girl (18-19) that finished her traing and was deep in shock at most guys in the gym she was working turning over with erections, lol, | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/28/2008 11:36:59 PM | Im very tactile so i love giving massages myself, shoulders, neck, back, feet you name it. :) When im with a girl i just love touching her and want to make her feel good. I remember once years ago with a gf, we were in bed getting frisky. I started giving her a nice massage, one minute shes making those gentle purring noises the next shes snoring...  I didnt have the heart to wake her so just curled up beside her and pulled a blanket over us. It never stopped me giving her or any partner more though. | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 12:06:22 AM | | Some men flat out refuse to give them because oral sex, making out, cuddling, or fixing the kitchen sink take less energy and have guaranteed immediate reciprocating, or mutual, benefits. | |
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rufree
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Joined: 2/4/2008
Msg: 131 | |
| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 6:08:18 AM | I don't give mor massages because I am pretty sure I would get thrown in jail .......
the only woman that would have me placed a restraining order on me .........
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 2:14:14 PM | I used to be with a man who gave the most intense backrubs, gentle and soothing while non-sexual,, he was truly gifted in this art. I miss the time I spent with him, so please do not compare all men to the ones you have been with....
Some men do realize that the value of a good massage will release a hormone that will, in turn,make her want to reciprocate eventually!
Reece | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 3:13:35 PM | whose massages usually feel better? man or woman?
make her want to reciprocate eventually!
selfishness right there. eventually? i give you 20 massages and then i get one? 1:1 ratio sister. | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 4:13:58 PM |
I don't get it, why is it some men flat out refuse to give them? Or if they do it's a lukewarm half hearted attempt which is usually along the lines of rub rub, okay sex now?
You're definitely dating the wrong men. There are plenty of men who enjoy giving massages, even when sex isn't a possibility. They just want you to feel better. I'd speak up and ask what you have to do to get more massages. Sometimes the guy doesn't realize how much you truly enjoy them. :) | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 4:43:42 PM | Do women enjoy giving massages too? We need it just as much. like i said 1:1 ratio.
are women capable of deep tissue massage though? | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 7:07:30 PM | "Do women enjoy giving massages too? We need it just as much. like i said 1:1 ratio.
are women capable of deep tissue massage though? " john.duke12
I, for one, am capable of giving deep tissue massages, actually it relieves the tension in my own hands too.  | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 7:26:29 PM | I think a lot of men, because of past relationships with women that might have been selfish are put out by it. I think that only God could ever tell you how many men have said the line "If I do that then she will expect it all the time!" The "that" being anything from massages to foot rubs to flowers or any pampering kind of treatment. I'm not defending them mind you. Personally I love doing that sort of thing for my special woman.
It's just too bad for me that I don't have anyone in my life right now. Hopefully God will bring someone into my life that I can do that sort of stuff .
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/29/2008 8:41:53 PM |
could ever tell you how many men have said the line "If I do that then she will expect it all the time!" The "that" being anything from massages to foot rubs to flowers or any pampering kind of treatment.
I see your point and understand you are not saying you yourself do this. I do have to say that when a person places a "value" to a loving action, they cheapen the sentiment. I know of women that won't give massages for fear it will obligate them to having sex after wards. And if they're not in the mood, then the guy feels rejected and unloved. So their solution is to just not give the massage to begin with. "Serve him breakfast in bed, and he'll expect it all the time", "Give him a BJ after work, and he'll complain when he doesn't get one", etc. etc.
I feel if you're to the point that you're assigning value to the actions that constitute a relationship, then your relationship is probably in trouble already. One or both feel that they're being taken for granted and are becoming concerned with what's "fair". It's a sad thing when you start thinking of your relationship in terms of not giving more than what you're given. | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/30/2008 6:22:14 AM | I think that's a big problem in a lot of relationships in our time. Too many people expect something from their partner. And when some kind of pampering is done and they start to expect it all the time it causes all sorts of troubles in the relationship. I like the idea of submitting to my future wife and her submitting to me. NOT in that perverted sense that I know so many people will see it when they read this but in the biblical sense of the word. Submission to your spouse is so much better than expectation in my mind.
Its a simple thing to remedy though...
All everyone needs to do is to get rid of the lies that we have come to believe that have been developed in us through out our lives. We believe these lies so much that they become the truth and then it clouds our judgement of what is happening in our present. We get triggered in the now because someone says or does something that stirs us up inside and brings back a belief or "core lie" from our past that causes us to feel strong emotions now. If we run away from someone or push them away or say "I would be happier if that person changed!" Then we are relying on someone else's behaviour to change for us to be happier. That will never happen because if you push that person away there will always be someone else out there and probably the next person to come along that will stir those emotions in you. So you have to go back and resolve the issue at the beginning. I've found a way of doing that and I'm a better man for it. The thing is that you have to believe in Jesus... (waits for the crowd to quiet down)... I was introduced to a healing prayer last year shortly after I was saved and it has definitely cleared up some of the lies that I believed about myself. What really blows me away is how much it has changed me. For example, I no longer get angry like I used to... the road rage that I used to experience is gone. Don't get me wrong, I still get angry if someone in another vehicle does something stupid, but I no longer carry that with me. I'm looking forward to my next relationship with whomever God brings into my life because from now on thanks to that prayer I no longer put the blame on other people. Now I take responsibility for my emotions and feelings. If I'm feeling some emotion then I know it is my emotion, my stuff and I have to deal with it. I just hope that the woman that God brings into my life will be interested in doing this kind of prayer, I believe that it will bring an awesome new level of intimacy and trust to that relationship. And then I also believe that there won't be an expectation of massages or flowers or whatever other pampering stuff. It will just be accepted as the gift that its meant to be. Well that's what I'm praying for, and not just because I love giving flowers and massages and footrubs. :)
Well good luck to everyone I hope you find your way in this crazy world. | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/30/2008 6:30:41 AM | I know of women that won't give massages for fear it will obligate them to having sex after wards.
I don't think that's true. The fact that she is putting effort into helping him feel good should make a normal man feel loved and cared for. If a guy needs sex afterwards to feel that way there are some deeper unresolved issues. Plus a sex ruins the relaxation achieved from the massage. Is this really how women feel? Obligated to have sex afterwards?
I thought women for the most part weren't able to give deep tissue massages. since it requires using more force and well developed hand muscles. who knows though? | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/30/2008 6:36:53 AM |
I don't think that's true. The fact that she is putting effort into helping him feel good should make a normal man feel loved and cared for. If a guy needs sex afterwards to feel that way there are some deeper unresolved issues. Plus a sex ruins the relaxation achieved from the massage. Is this really how women feel? Obligated to have sex afterwards?
Then you're different than the guys my friends dated. They'd give the massage, the guy would get excited because a girl was rubbing all over his body, then he'd want to get it on. Everyone does not react the same way to being touched. | |
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| why don't more guys give massages?
Posted: 6/30/2008 1:03:30 PM | "I thought women for the most part weren't able to give deep tissue massages. since it requires using more force and well developed hand muscles. who knows though? "
john.duke12
I have the ability to penetrate the deep muscle tissue because I have worked with my hands for ten years and they are very strong, although quite tiny.
Please, when engaging in any deep tissue massage make sure you rehydrate after,
lots of water to replenish!  | |
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