| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 10:04:14 AM | Yes I judge each and every date I go out on! It happens to be a know fact that depressed people use sex to self medicate. If someone goes off their meds they will sleep with a date without a condom more likely then if they stayed on.
How do I know this?? My girlfriend went off her paxil and became a bar whore...went back on it and evened out just thought I would inform the public. She isnt the only person I have know to act wacky when skipping a few days of meds.
All of dating is judgemental wouldnt you say??? | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 10:10:35 AM |
Dont get me wrong sex is awesome but i will not take a stupid chance of getting HIV just for one night of fun with someone i never took the time to get to know.
Actually you can have sex with someone that has HIV and still not get infected. Why HIV is not easily transmitted through vaginal sex. Most of the cases where infection occurs through vaginal sex, as is common in Africa, are do to the existence of abrasions from another STD. | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 78 | |
| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 10:20:11 AM |
Geez....judgmental much?
Indeed, seeing as the percentages haven't been qualified as to "Is that 30% all the time or 30% have at least once in their entire lives etc".........
Each to their own. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 10:25:04 AM |
How do I know this?? My girlfriend went off her paxil and became a bar whore...went back on it and evened out just thought I would inform the public. She isnt the only person I have know to act wacky when skipping a few days of meds.
Oh, well....there you go. Since one person behaved erratically, it obviously proves that everyone does. I would insert more rolling eyes here, but my mother always told me my eyes might stick in the back of my head if I kept doing that.
By the way, I would absolutely disagree that deciding whether or not you want to continue dating someone is the same thing as "JUDGING" them. We can know that we're not attracted to someone without making a judgment as to that person's worth as a person.
This kind of "OMG - how horrible that adults are having consensual sex!" attitude is completely different. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 11:00:05 AM | Actually you can have sex with someone that has HIV and still not get infected. Why HIV is not easily transmitted through vaginal sex. Most of the cases where infection occurs through vaginal sex, as is common in Africa, are do to the existence of abrasions from another STD.
Very true. The chances of contracting HIV in a one time encounter from an infected person even if no protection is used is actually quite low. Still, that should by no means be seen as a reason not to use protection.
And of course, HIV is not the only STD to worry about. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 11:33:37 AM | Sean,
The ones that go that long without having it detected are likely NOT getting checked for it. Once it's in your system it starts to attack T-cells. The virus multiplies VERY rapidly until the immune system suppresses it, but by that time it's evident in the bloodstream. These people who are healthy and getting it are likely not going to get checked. Many people don't get STI's tests done. Heck before my marriage ended last summer the last STI exam I had was almost 10 years prior when my then-wife was pregnant. She had an infection and they tested her for an STI as it was similarly symptomatic but it came back negative. They asked me to be tested to see if maybe I had something I gave her that wasn't appearing in the tests. Since then I've had two tests. But most of my guy friends have never been for an exam until recently when I've started harrassing them to ensure they are safe and clean so I don't end up contracting something they are spreading! LOL
Outmind made a really good point I didn't consider in my previous post:
Actually you can have sex with someone that has HIV and still not get infected. Why HIV is not easily transmitted through vaginal sex. Most of the cases where infection occurs through vaginal sex, as is common in Africa, are do to the existence of abrasions from another STD. I've read this too. Vaginal secretions and saliva are very similar and do not have that close of contact with the bloodstream where these t-cells travel. Semen is created and stored more internally than the other two fluids and it has more chance to have some of the virus transferred to it. This is why a woman has a much greater chance of contracting it from an infected man than a man has of contracting it from an infected woman.
Not-For-You, I don't think many depressed people self-medicate through sex. If that was the case there wouldn't be many depressed people in this world would there?! There'd be an awful lot of shiny happy people who are getting laid! People eat, drink, and do drugs to self-medicate when depressed. Those who self-medicate with sex are called sex addicts, and the prevalence of this disease is fairly low in our population.
Did you ever consider the possibility that her going off paxil just resurrected her libido? Most drugs have an adverse effect on sexuality and anti-depressants are some of the worst for killing a person's sex drive. Were you together when she went off of it or had you just broken up? If the latter is the case maybe she was on the rebound and just looking to sow some wild oats or ease the pain. There are so many variables at work here. You cannot simply correlate her depression and the fact that she slept around for a bit and then apply it to all of the population as theory. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 11:51:30 AM | The problem I have with this 30% of women is that I don't respect them and lose my attraction for them.
THANK YOUfor having the balls to write down a practical pragmatic and sensible reason why 70% of us DON'T have sex on the first date. Personally, I'd rather have a whiny****ead lose my number because I was "old school", than to have a decent guy lose it because I went by "If I don't he'll find some other woman that will".
I am glad that I havn't met these women. They must have used a skewed sample.
Once again, Speeling and Gramar are soe importanyly here.
I believe the quote should read :
They must have used a screwed sample.
Why don't we split the difference and go with "skrewed"??
Cindy O | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 4:52:55 PM | Hmm, only a math geek would know the answer to that. The question is who does these 30% of women have sex with  I can visualize some little ol person, sitting in a cube, having nothing better to do than come up with these surveys or studies. Sad fact is, they are probably making $100K a year. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 5:06:48 PM | re the Opost
One out of three? Wow! It must of course be because they get to know the other person so well before the first date via online dating tools!
PS. Not using a condom on any date is IMO suicidal!
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 5:14:37 PM |
I can't imagine that sex means anything less than intercourse. I'm pretty sure that when the expression "have sex" is used, the commonly accepted definition is sexual intercourse.
I disagree. "Having sex" many times means "any kind of interpersonal activity that includes taking off all underwear".
I had this discussion with someone the other day. The other stuff is called "sexual activity" or even "oral sex." Sex is sexual intercourse, no question.
Well, that shows that for "someone" those definitions are clear. It does not necessarily mean that everybody else uses that same definition.
As proof, please note that condoms were mentioned. No condoms are needed for making out.
No kidding. But they are needed (or should be used) for blowjobs in case you care about HIV and Herpes protection. Which implies ("proves", actually, to speak with your words) that "having sex" indeed includes oral sex as far as the study is concerned. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 5:21:21 PM |
Actually you can have sex with someone that has HIV and still not get infected. Why HIV is not easily transmitted through vaginal sex. Most of the cases where infection occurs through vaginal sex, as is common in Africa, are do to the existence of abrasions from another STD.
I honestly can't believe that you're indeed playing down the risk of an HIV infection, and that you are practically advertising to practice unsafe sex on a dating website.
It is proven that most people that have been infected with HIV have been infected through sexual intercourse. And your little advertisement for unsafe sex makes honestly me want to encourage anyone who might get HIV after reading your statement to sue you.
if you personally don't like condoms don't have sex. Or make sure that you're being tested after every woman you sleep with.
But don't encourage others not to use condoms. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 5:30:54 PM | It happens to be a know fact that depressed people use sex to self medicate. If someone goes off their meds they will sleep with a date without a condom more likely then if they stayed on. How do I know this?? My girlfriend went off her paxil and became a bar whore...went back on it and evened out just thought I would inform the public. She isnt the only person I have know to act wacky when skipping a few days of meds.
And the fact that YOU have encountered one identifiable and (unknown #s of unidentifiable) persons who sleep with a date without a condom indicates a "know fact"? "know" only to you, perhaps? Are you also qualified to clinically state her behavior is "self medication"???
they will sleep with a date without a condom more likely then if they stayed on LMAO this part really is my favorite...if you sleep with a date, without a condom, CLEARLY the damn thing hasn't "stayed on".
Whomever wrote this article was obviously NOT among those who encountered the 30% in question.
I would also like to say for the record : I can honestly and unequivocally state that I have never had sex with a woman on the first date...or any date, for that matter. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 6:32:50 PM | LOL, "A screen door in a hurricane", I haven't laughed that hard in a while captfun, it must be a fisherman thing, nice mahi mahi, check out my muskie!
Urbanessa, I have never heard of a girl who wanted to put a condom in her mouth but I don't think the statistic in the magazine article about not using a condom for intercourse on the first date is accurate.
As far as judging a woman based on her having sex on the first date, sometimes the ones that make a guy wait the longest turn out to be the ones who get around the most. Alot of women who have sex on the first date turn out to have had very little experience and few partners in the past, even to be a little innocent, repressed, conservative, "traditional" in their tastes and end up in a long term monogamous relationship with the guy. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 6:38:25 PM | Urbanessa,
The chance of getting HIV via a blowjob is very small, unless you have open cuts in your mouth. Even after that, it's still difficult to contract.
You can also get herpes even with condom use. It is transmitted via skin-to-skin contact. That means balls to chin, to put it bluntly. Even so, for the most part, genital herpes and oral herpes are different. Most people have one type "down there" and a different type on the mouth, so genital-to-mouth herpes is not common.
I don't believe that OutMind was advocating unprotected sex. He was just trying to combat any irrational fear that Sean70 may have stirred up. Yes, there is always a chance one will get HIV through sex. But in taking precautions, you can lower your risk considerably.
You said that it is proven that people with HIV get it through sexual intercourse. You forget that it can be passed from mother to child, can be gotten from dirty needles, come in infected blood transfusions, or can be gotten by health care workers who come in contact with infected blood.
That said, kudos to you for being safe and always using condoms, even during oral sex. It's commendable, and I wish more people would follow your practices. | |
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vro312
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Joined: 11/22/2007
Msg: 92 | |
| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 6:48:19 PM | No kidding. But they are needed (or should be used) for blowjobs in case you care about HIV and Herpes protection. Which implies ("proves", actually, to speak with your words) that "having sex" indeed includes oral sex as far as the study is concerned.
It's unlikely you possess the faculties to speak my words. And, I was neither thinking of nor speaking of "blow jobs." 
Since you are so adept at identifying faulty logic, I imagine by now you have deduced that there's no f-ing way to know what the study really meant by "having sex." So your attempt to define the expression and justify your definition is just as insubstantial as mine.
All I know is that the majority of people I have come into contact with consider "having sex" to be having sexual intercourse. For me, there is no question as to what the term means.
Well, that shows that for "someone" those definitions are clear. It does not necessarily mean that everybody else uses that same definition.
Thank you for translating the obvious. I'm not one to suggest that "everybody" anything, and I can't see how you drew that conclusion from my post. All I said was that I had a conversation.
I mean, I communicated with someone who went into battle thinking she was armed. That doesn't mean everybody thinks they're armed, now does it? Just one poor soul--that's all.
I disagree. "Having sex" many times means "any kind of interpersonal activity that includes taking off all underwear".
You mean like going to the doctor for a physical? | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 7:01:56 PM | From post 92:
"All I know is that the majority of people I have come into contact with consider "having sex" to be having sexual intercourse. For me, there is no question as to what the term means."
I agree and I think that most agree too, that "having sex" means having sexual intercourse, except, of course, Bill (Clinton)! | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 7:24:40 PM | Does anybody have any links to these studies to give them context? I assume these are not peer reviewed studies.
Or does it even matter? Why let facts get in the way of a good opinion!
Bob | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 8:13:22 PM |
I honestly can't believe that you're indeed playing down the risk of an HIV infection, and that you are practically advertising to practice unsafe sex on a dating website.
I'm only relating the truth. If you don't believe me, do some research and you'll find the statistical odds of getting HIV from a single sexual incident with an infected partner of the opposite sex is quite low. Somewhere around 1 in 500. Is this the kind of fact we shouldn't discuss? Sorry, but it's reality. And I'm not advertising for people to practice unsafe sex. Please don't put words in my mouth.
It is proven that most people that have been infected with HIV have been infected through sexual intercourse.
Did I say otherwise?
And your little advertisement for unsafe sex makes honestly me want to encourage anyone who might get HIV after reading your statement to sue you.
Are you also going to sue medical websites that list the statistical chances of contracting HIV? Are they advertising unsafe sex by telling the truth?
if you personally don't like condoms don't have sex. Or make sure that you're being tested after every woman you sleep with.
Did I say anywhere in my last post that I don't like condoms. Nope.
But don't encourage others not to use condoms.
I never once encouraged someone not to use a condom. I'm all for condom use. This is what I wrote in my last post:
Still, that should by no means be seen as a reason not to use protection. And of course, HIV is not the only STD to worry about."
Does this sound like I'm encouraging people not to use condoms? | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 8:21:19 PM | If u stop the women on the street that fit the criteria, then u can get what ever percentage u want. I think ur rught though. I learned form my ex partner that if u do not give it up u get way more in return. That is how I got her for I did not give her a thing of value. I gave her priceless knowledge. (then I got it!!!))) To this day my friends still talk about the one they did not get and not the ones they did.. food for thought. This was very hard for me to explain to my 16 year old daughter 4 years ago, that every guy including the one who wants u as a friend is focused on one thing. (hard for me because I thought she would see a bad side of me, and then ask how I knew so much). As dinner was over and we left my daughter turned and said to me, "Dad, you could have waisted this talk for I talked to your wife earlier......) So ladies if u want then wait. (Imust be stupid for posting this....penance?)
mike lol | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 8:26:51 PM | I like your points but hard for u to reach unless u do not put yourself above or judge.
Everyone has choices and the path that follows. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 8:47:43 PM | weaselontoast....if you would like to educate yourself further
http://www.bipolardisorder.com/understanding/symptoms.jsp?reqNavId=1.3
"Unwise involvement in pleasurable but potentially risky activities (e.g., may rack up significant debt, have sex with strangers, abuse drugs, or make rash investment decisions)
Withdraw of medication will make someone crash pretty fast as I have previously stated. Now if you would like to look up the statistics of how many people suffer with the illness or are on medication for it be my guest, I already know. You will be shocked and it may put the 30% into perspective. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 9:07:44 PM | | I'm fully aware of bipolar disorder, and I've certainly seen people on meds crash as a result of not taking them...but thanks SO much for your gracious offer to educate me. MY point was that your claim that it's a "known fact" simply because of your experiences with a roommate is really not an authoritative statistic. I'm not shocked...but hardly think it's safe to assume that bipolar women getting off their meds make up the 30% of women having sex on first dates. Some are simply prone to risky behavior. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/28/2008 9:34:15 PM | | I'm not really sure where the bipolar thing came up. Not-for-you mentioned depression but I haven't seen reference to bipolar anywhere but your last post weasel. If it was mentioned I'm sorry for my ignorance. I can see someone who is bipolar and laying off the drugs going a little nuts. My father-in-law was severely bipolar and would go on lavish spending sprees for people he did or did not know. He'd buy the town flowers. He'd buy his neighbour expensive items. He'd buy cars and furniture he didn't need and couldn't afford. That was his thing. Every bipolar person is different. But I don't think there are THAT many bipolar women in the world who use sex as a crutch when off their meds. And I don't think THAT many of these women who do use sex in their times of desperation go off their meds frequently. I don't think this has any real reflection on this figure. Statistics are garbage. I like scientific facts. They are a little more concrete than some research company or grad student's study. | |
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