| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/29/2008 2:27:43 PM | Oh really?! If that were true, why is there TONS of threads stating that men will not consider women "relationship
material", if they have sex on the first date? WTF?
And most of them don't see the hyprocrisy in saying they are looking for "long term", & attempting to get first date sex, with THAT attitude.
Because strangely enough a lot of men can have sex with a women on a first date, enjoy the experience immensely, and then say "But I couldn't see myself in a relationship with her. She's kind of a slut." i.e. She was good for a quick fling, but nothing else. It's not that the guy doesn't want to be in a relationship, he just doesn't want to be in one with her.
If that makes her "not relationship material", what does that make him?!
A guy who wanted to have sex. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/29/2008 2:32:42 PM |
Because strangely enough a lot of men can have sex with a women on a first date, enjoy the experience immensely, and then say "But I couldn't see myself in a relationship with her. She's kind of a slut." i.e. She was good for a quick fling, but nothing else. It's not that the guy doesn't want to be in a relationship, he just doesn't want to be in one with her.
If that makes her "not relationship material", what does that make him?!
A guy who wanted to have sex. So why does that make her a slut in his eyes?! He slept with her too! That's such retarded logic of men to think that way. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/29/2008 2:42:06 PM |
So why does that make her a slut in his eyes?! He slept with her too! That's such retarded logic of men to think that way.
Yes, but call a man a slut and he'll wear it as a badge of honour. And his friends will pat him on the back for it.
Call a woman a slut, and she'll be none too happy. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/29/2008 3:46:49 PM | Newsflash, folks. If a guy wants to keep seeing you, he's going to keep seeing you, regardless of whether or not you have sex with him on date 1, date 10 or date 30. There's no such thing as sexual-intimacy insurance, and using sex (or the lack thereof), as a way to make a budding relationship last longer is a sure way to end it sooner. It's the worst kind of game-playing, when you do it for the wrong reasons.
Then again, topics like this give some women the opportunity to play the "I'm a better person than you are because I make different sexual choices" card. God forbid we should allow for differences without it turning into a good girl/bad girl contest.
There is merit in the above, except in the case of guys why try it on with every woman they meet and write off the ones who participate as sluts.
And what really really sucks a rock is to have LOUSY sex on the first date and never hear from the guy again because he was just looking for a warm hole to stick his teeny weenie in.
That doesn't happen much anymore because I've started trusting my intuition about
how good or bad a man is likely to be in the sack. So for me to do first date sex I'd have to be reasonably sure that he was going to be a good performer,I'd have to WANT to have sex with him, and not much care,one way or the other,if I ever heard from him again. Which rules out having first date sex with men I see as poor risks for sexual enjoyment, men I don't want to have sex with on any terms, and men that I really want to explore further before getting horizontal. Has nothing whatsoever to do with good girl/bad girl.
Cindy O | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/29/2008 5:46:19 PM |
Options have everything to do with how quickly a woman will give it up to a guy. When a woman senses that a particular guy is in demand, and that lots of other women would be willing to satisfy him, she is much more likely to engage in sex with that guy on the 1st date.
Oh please. Lots of men have inflated senses of self when it comes to their "options." It's only if a man believes that a WOMAN is in demand that he treats her well. And giving it up out of a desperate sense of scarcity will not get you treated well. | |
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| beware statistics; be VERY ware.
Posted: 2/29/2008 7:19:24 PM | There was a headline in the 1980's [big news; often quoted] about a woman in her 40's being as statistically likely to marry, as to be struck by lightning. There was also a retraction [not such big news; not often quoted] admitting the statistician was cracking a joke and the reporter took it out of context.
Listen to message # 34, he knows. It's a spin.
And message # 15 in this post hit a familiar note with me. The only woman I know personally who admits to behaving so recklessly, is a woman so obviously starving for love that it hurts me to look at her.
But -- aren't we all hungry for love?
I know I am. And I'm so horrified by the things I'm reading tonight. But whether it's indisputably proved to be 30% or 0.1% or 90% of what other people do, it ain't likely to change my ideas on what's right for me to do. | |
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| beware statistics; be VERY ware.
Posted: 2/29/2008 10:30:06 PM | 90 % of statistics are made up, the other 10% are just bullsh*t.
those stats don't really shock me , though the lack of condom part disturbs me.
consenting adults doing consenting adult type things, ces't la vie I spose..... at least 30% of the online population is getting laid. | |
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| beware statistics; be VERY ware.
Posted: 2/29/2008 11:05:15 PM | | The lack of a condom sounds horrible if you assume that these women are still and frequently having sex on the first date. However, that seems unlikely. More likely that are recalling something from their past: perhaps a single incident when they were young and foolish. In that case, it makes perfect sense. They were out of control, not thinking at all. If they had the self-control to remember the condom, they probably wouldn't be having sex with a stranger. | |
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| beware statistics; be VERY ware.
Posted: 2/29/2008 11:24:00 PM | Okay, so I'm to assume that every man and woman posting here involved in a new relationship (whether long-term committed, or short-term 1-night stand) uses a condom for the first 5 years until the test results are back???!!! Or better yet...abstains??? Because sitting here preaching that it's disgusting and irresponsible and disturbing and scary and all the other adverbs describing what YOUR opinion is right or wrong don't mean squat unless you practice what you preach....agreed? And since it takes about 5 years to get a warm and fuzzy feeling that YOU and YOUR partner are clean, then I am to assume based on your rantings, that no way would you jeopardize you or your partner's health. Right? You're ALL that concerned and take the appropriate measures, right? So, first date, 30th date, 1 year or 3 years....it don't matter, YOU'RE doing what is required....right?
~ds~ | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 2/29/2008 11:55:09 PM | | i agree with that, its very true, women do find it very offensive but there are also alot of men who take offence to it. i dont find it fair that the woman is made to be the slut when the guy also did the deed, it takes 2 to tango...i guess thats just one of the many stereotypes of modern day society | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/1/2008 12:37:36 AM | | You are assuming that the guys are the ones with multiple dates. Fact is... women are the ones getting 30-50 emails a day from desperate guys and can take their pick from dozens of guys to go out with. Whether it be for sex or for a free meal every night of the week... the women definitely have way more options. Assuming they are somewhat attractive that is. Most women just love the attention and the ego boost it gives them to have so many guys contacting them. I personally don't contact very many women because I feel I have more to offer someone and prefer not to be just another "number." | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/1/2008 1:16:00 AM | Did they say 30% of all first dates end with sex or happened at least once to 30% of women?
It means have they ever had sex on the first date. Obviously 30 percent of the time, women are not having sex on the first.
So why does that make her a slut in his eyes?! He slept with her too! That's such retarded logic of men to think that way.
That is totally logical. To make a baby only requires a man the investment of a few minutes. It requires the woman the investment of nine months plus years of rasing a child. At least that is how it worked for eons and, since modern times is only a flash in the pan in evolutionary terms, we are still operating with our Stone Age brains. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/1/2008 7:12:27 AM |
It's only if a man believes that a WOMAN is in demand that he treats her well.
I can agree only to the extend that the statement seems to be based on the assumption that a person chooses a partner in relation to what other people think rather than what they themselves regard as something of worth. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 1:10:58 AM | Choosing a partner is a cognitive process, but attraction
is an instinctive, autonomic response not under conscious
control. If it appears other people find you attractive,
you'll be able to attract more and higher quality mates. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 2:27:07 AM |
For most women, it's emotional suicide. Eventually they will wake up one morning, look in the mirror and wonder why are they miserable. And they will wonder why they they have no one in their life - in particular men - who gives a damn about them
Holy shit, Judgmental much? Wonderfully negative attitude you have there. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 7:51:41 AM |
It's only if a man believes that a WOMAN is in demand that he treats her well.
Speaking for myself, I wouldn't care to have sex with such a man on the first or ANY date.
I'm looking for a man who treats people well because they are human beings, not because they are ' in demand'.
So I'm over 50. Alot of the men in my age range are MARRIED. I live in a less populated area. Just simply by practical and demographic factors I'm not likely to present as "in demand"...so I should let every Joe Schmoe who buys me a cup of coffee or a drink have sex with me???
I DON'T THINK SO.
Cindy O | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 8:11:38 AM | WOW! It is more than likely true these days ... but as long as people practice safe sex then it shouldn't matter ... I like to think I am not one of this 30% however I have been there ....but I would prefer to wait esp if I want some kind of relationship ... I don't like how it says "women who placed online personal ads" ... as there are plenty of women who go out there just for sex on a fri/sat night.
Ax | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 8:15:41 AM | IN RESPONSE TO heathenspirit
Thats Why Waiting for that comfort zone should be the train of thought if a relationship is wanted ......... BUT why cant a women want to just have sex too without being called a slut or not relationship material ... it sucks! .... Plus early sex can still lead to a relationship because they have had great sex. ;)
Ax | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 8:21:55 AM |
UT why cant a women want to just have sex too without being called a slut or not relationship material ... it sucks! .... Plus early sex can still lead to a relationship because they have had great sex. ;)
Because some people find it morally wrong, so they feel it necessary to judge others who engage in such behaviour. Of course, the morality police get shocked to find out that some people actually enjoy one night stands (and GASP! some of them are actually women!!)
So, they want everyone to believe that one night stands are fraught with certain STDs, emotional heartache, and all sorts of psychological pain.
And they also don't realize that just because someone indulges in a one night stand (be they male or female) it doesn't make them chronic casual sex fiends. They'll almost certainly settle down like everyone else, but they just aren't at that place in their life right now.
And I agree, it's a shame that women who have one night stands are labelled sluts. But, who is generally doing that labelling? Yep, other women! | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 8:53:18 AM | | The number seems rather LOW! Why would any guy kiss and tell? If it is good he will want to come back for more. The word 'slut' does not define a lady that has sex on the 1st date or any date. In my opinion a slut is a female that dresses like she wants laid and goes out looking to get laid by the 1st stiff one she can find. I'd never be with a slut, but if a lady has the urge just as I do it makes no diffeence if it is the 1st or 5th date. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 9:02:58 AM | heathenspirit .....
I pretty much agree with you there ..... I mostly think that one night stands are wrong however I can't commit to that thinking due to experience ... so I gonna sit on the fence on that as I have never gone outta my way to do it ... it all boils down to circumstances for the minority that do it on occasion AND yeah labeling is wrong whether it be women or men ... ... HOWEVER there are those men and women who are serial one nighters who have made early sex such a taboo ... which is a shame.
Ax | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 9:03:11 AM | Yes I believe that could be true.......especially with all the internet dating calculated in there.....I think that brings the numbers way up.....it used to be that you'd meet someone in your circle of friends and date them......people that were more familiar to you.....now with meeting strangers and not knowing who they really are or what they really want it has changed a lot. So many more opportunities to meet people....
I was shocked at the 'no condom' percentage though........I believe there is a lot of promiscuity out here on these sites and I'd bet the diseases are rampant. | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 9:07:06 AM | captain-jack ..... you got it spot on with .... "The word 'slut' does not define a lady that has sex on the 1st date or any date. In my opinion a slut is a female that dresses like she wants laid and goes out looking to get laid by the 1st stiff one she can find"
I could never be a slut either ... the heels would hurt my feet for a start lol Plus wearing next to nothing would make me too cold. LOL
Ax | |
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| 30% of women have sex on first dates?
Posted: 3/3/2008 9:17:26 AM | Do any of our opinions really matter in the scope of the big picture???
What is the purpose of the question really, and do the opinions given increase our knowledge, understanding, awareness, and wisdom? In any case it certainly is entertaining reading, so keep those questions and opinions going…
Oh, and if anyone remembers the 1970’s”Free Love and Flower Power” They may recall that just about everybody or 90% of girls/guys had sex ( intercourse) on the first date… So having sex on a first date for women definitely has changed if it’s only 30% now…
So my question to all is: Will this fact change any of our individual behavior?
In closing, remember to always make time for fun whatever it is to YOU!!! | |
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