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| submissive women
Posted: 3/6/2008 5:42:03 PM |
Do men really like submissive women? or do most of them really not wanna be the aggressive party? im very submissive and finding a dominant man is very hard to find these days, how can u tell if a man is dom without askin him from jump?
Personally, I don't think men prefer submissive woman at all, there a little boring if truth be said when they just leave it all up tto the man. I much prefer a woman who wants to be just as involved and forthcoming as the man, who tells you wants she wants. Makes for much better and raunchy sex.
It takes two to tango, so both both should tango.  | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/6/2008 5:47:29 PM | If he acts tough, insists on having his way most of the time, and irritates the hell out of your friends with his attitude, then he probably is a dominant.
No, he probably is not dominant. He is what we refer to as a wannabe power tripper that is in it for all the wrong reasons.
In my experience, a submissive woman needs much more attention than your average gal.
Then you probably weren't with submissive women but needy ones. Submissive women are typically strong willed and independent. Hang around enough in a D/s community and you'll quickly learn that.
Personally, I don't think men prefer submissive woman at all, there a little boring if truth be said when they just leave it all up to the man. I much prefer a woman who wants to be just as involved and forthcoming as the man, who tells you wants she wants. Makes for much better and raunchy sex.
LOL, that's because you have obviously never been with a true submissive woman. :) A sub is just as involved in the end result as the dominant. She should absolutely be telling you what she wants, it just may not be in the middle of your hot and wild sex. If you are actually doing your job right you'll know what she wants, needs and desires before you ever begin the act. If you're not sure then you ask her and she should be more than happy to tell you.
how can u tell if a man is dom without askin him from jump?
As for how to find out if a man is dominant, that is a tricky one to do without completely giving anything away. I've learned quickly that announcing that you're submissive outright brings out the wannabes and the power trippers. You just have to learn to look for traits of natural dominance, such as they are not afraid to take control of a situation. I also look for good communications skills since most Dom's understand the importance of talking and understanding what each other wants and needs. If you're out with them in person you can test the waters by using submissive postures around them and seeing how they react to them. I've found that even a man that hasn't done it before will respond if he just naturally is dominant. :) I am not looking for D/s relationship myself but I am looking for a man that is naturally dominant and not afraid to go for what he wants and is never going to be afraid to touch me. Tough and macho have absolutely nothing at all to do with that. | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/6/2008 8:16:36 PM | i personaly dont think i cant take on a dom role ever, but i jus wish i could find a guy who would consider being the dom in the bedroom, him being dom he could tell me to overpower him, its give give u know, im in no way plain boring or vanilla
thanks for the posts
carly | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/6/2008 8:53:57 PM | Carly, if he was a Dom, he wouldn't want you to overpower him. That's not in a Dom's mentality.And definitely not the way it works. You might be looking for a switch. It sounds like you're taking on a Dommes role in your post.You're telling him to tell you to overpower him. Sounds pretty Dom to me. | |
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Nergal
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Joined: 4/29/2007
Msg: 80 | |
| submissive women
Posted: 3/6/2008 8:55:08 PM | | But thats the way it works sometimes ... its called topping from the bottom ... | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/6/2008 8:57:11 PM |
sweetie dom males are everywhere!
Regardless of what you might think, there are a LOT more sub males than there are Dom males.If you find someone in that lifestyle, ask them and they will concur. | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/6/2008 9:44:20 PM | | what kind of submissive are you speaking of BDSM play or just an assertive man? | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/7/2008 3:21:12 AM | Regardless of what you might think, there are a LOT more sub males than there are Dom males.If you find someone in that lifestyle, ask them and they will concur.
I believe that holds true for both sexes. Being dominant is very demanding role and comes with a lot of responsability. If I had to guess, about 1 in every 10 people is probably dominant. A good dom has their pick of who they can date, a submissive often does not.
But thats the way it works sometimes ... its called topping from the bottom ...
I just tried to explain that to someone the other day. They told me a they dated a "sub" who had tried to control absolutely every aspect of his life (how they dressed, what they did for a living, etc) except for sex. She demanded that he take control and be dominant (which means she was actually still doming because she insisted on it).
what kind of submissive are you speaking of BDSM play or just an assertive man?
I would just like to clarify that BDSM and D/s are two completely seperate things. Just because a couple practices D/s does not mean they practice BDSM. Yes, they often times can go hand in hand... but so does smokeing while you drinking. That doesn't mean that every drinker smokes. :) | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/7/2008 9:01:22 AM | i dont know wut u guys mean, im seeking a guy who can rough me up in bed, i also have a rape fantasy i wanna b taken, u know, i dont know how to explain it LOL i jus want meet sum1 who i can b comfortable enough to do these things with
carly | |
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Nergal
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Joined: 4/29/2007
Msg: 85 | |
| submissive women
Posted: 3/7/2008 9:03:07 AM | | Whic probably means someone who is naturally dominant, not a plastic BDSM dom ... | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/7/2008 2:35:36 PM | I'm drawn to assertive men that have a strong hold on life and know what they want. I can usually tell what type of character a man owns within the first few dates. Regardless of how handsome he may be, if he's weak minded, lazy or unsure of himself... I won't continue dating him.
I desire a real man that's mentally and physically healthy, goal oriented and works diligently at obtaining his dreams. Usually these type of men are dominate and I like this. What I don't like is a man that is egotistical and arrogant; these bullish personalities cross the line from intelligence and assertion.
When it comes to sex, it should always be give and take. I can be both submissive and dominate because I know what makes for great pleasure. There is nothing wrong with a woman taking control and pleasing her mate with dominate sex. A majority of men usually like this type of sexual appetite from women.
I love it when a man gives me complete control during sex and I do with him as I please to stimulate him and get him off. On the flip side, I love it when a man is not affraid to get rough with me at times. When I'm having hard core naughty sex, my body becomes submissive to him. There is that utopic state of mind where he can't fukc hard enough or fast enough. I allow him to use my body for him to discover his ultimate sexual pleasures. However, I have only found this with the few men that have shared a love and trust with me.
OP, I've never had problems finding dominate men. They're out there. If you're having problems, then you might need to search for these men in other places. Take into consideration a man in uniform. These professions usually call for strong willed men that are protectors and defenders. Some of the best sex that I've experienced was from a Navy 'diver' and damn if he didn't. Those Firemen have it going on too!!!
I'm not saying that all men that wear uniforms are the best lovers, but just pay attention to what your date does for a living, how hard he works and his passion for life. Most importantly...as long as he treats you with love and respect. | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 7:51:49 AM | | love submissive women,i want to find one, | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 11:19:02 AM | seriouslyhorney, i read ur profile, wut are ur preferences, i know u said this isnt important that isnt important, but if you could choose this partner what would she look like? just curious
carly | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 1:02:12 PM | | I HATE submissive women. Which isn't to say that I prefer aggressive women, but one of my exes would just lie there like a dead fish every time we had sex. Totally not a turn on at all. | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 4:03:41 PM | I had to post to this topic. I love to be dominate in the bedroom, however, anyone that has been in that sort of relationship can tell you that the one submiting is really in control. It takes trust, and a lot of personal power to submit.
With that being said however, I find nothing sexier then a women "asking" me to dominate her, and everyonce in awhile, taking control and "dominating" me. Submission has nothing to do with if thier laying thier or not. I think most guys have been with a woman that just lays there, expecting to be pleaseed.. There is NOTHING worse. I like a women that knows how to please, and be pleased, and willing to expand her horizons.
Just my take on things | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 4:41:42 PM | Ok, I'm really trying to think this thru about men. Because the "stereotype" of a sub man I've had is a man who is very dominant in his job, so in the bedroom he wants to give up control. I don't know if that's true or not, but if so, then what about a man who is dominant?
Like, what about a man who appears very easy going, lets his girl pick the movies, restaurants, etc. And at work has to do what his supervisors say, punch his time card, etc... So appears submissive, aka not dominant, in the daytime. Then during sex, will he be more likely or less likely to want to take control, to dominate? or is there no "likely" here?
IOW, a man who dominates in the bed, what will his daytime - workplace, everyday interactionso - be like?
Kaylie | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 8:53:57 PM | I'll bite Kay.....chomp!
Never a problem to adjust from Clark Kent to......SUPERMAN!!!
Done that often, gal's give signal's,....hard ...or soft .
Interesting note....I've seen guy's who are so self - conscious, they awkwardly
try to cover up with a personna that mimmic's [ in their mind] DOMINANCE.
I worked with a classic case, he frequently reminded people about how much
he was a big success in the sack, but then one could see the 'crack's'.
I, for one don't buy this crap. Dominant in their own mind, and I 've gone up
against the best of them. Anyone can feign a personna, project one made to
order. For the record, he wound up divorced, as I figured, wifey couldn't
play his childish assinine game's for ever.
She used to help enforce his attempt's at projecting his IMAGE, age 30 +
people should be somewhat grown up.
He barked order's to a lower echelon, in front of her, she say's "you big bully!"
Made me vomit! Divorced month's later! He actually acted like a little child
around me, so much for 'dominant' people.
Another faker went up against me a number of time's, DOMINATOR..[he thought]
Wound up whimpering. Guy's walked up to me" HOW did you do THAT?"
Simple! Let them self destruct in front of everybody, ergo....they do it themselve's!
Got used to dealing with these type's , since their Momma's left them abandoned.
Sorry to run this LONG! DOMINATING...amint I ? heeheeheee | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 10:49:21 PM | wow -- I think this is one of the broadest questions ever asked.
I believe that people [not 'men' or 'women'] like what they like, and sometimes people mesh and sometimes they grind. Some men prefer women of a particular skin color or ethnicity. Myself, I prefer a woman who tends toward the submissive end of the scale, is highly intelligent, can use long words often, and must not smoke. I could care less what her age is [presuming she's old enough to vote and young enough to not have to worry about special discounts at the movies] nor do I wanna know up front how big her boobage is, what her hair color is, or anything like that.
As for the invisible second half of your question, pondering why many guys seem to wanna take the back seat in a relationship... I think this question has some social ramifications. Generally, I subscribe to the idea that for a guy to be 'manly,' he needs a male role model, and nowadays a lot of young and even midle-aged men are int he dating scene who grew up with single mothers at home -- at least, nowadays there's a lot more of them in this situation than there was, perhaps, 30 years ago. At any rate, their moms, usually well-intended [exceptions ot every rule, I know] taught their sons how to be 'nice guys' instead of how to be 'studs.' Think about it, ladies, how often have you chatted with girlfriends and described a guy as being, 'Well, I dunno -- he's a nice guy, but...'
The very clich itself, 'nice guys finish last,' is simple a too-literal interpretation of chivalry.. the whole Sir Walter Raleigh personae, laying the coat down on the muddy puddle, shit like that. I can't stand when I run across a potential femme, submissive or not, who 'refuses' to talk -- I don't like having to beat every setence of conversation out of her, be it online, in person, or anything in between. People have told me that I'm picky, and you know something? I would question anyone who wasn't, and I would question my own desireability if I were scooped up by a woman who herself was unpicky. I wanna earn her interest, and I wanna re-earn it every day.
No idea how I meandered from the original quesiton to that opening, but whatever. Tada! | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 10:53:05 PM |
...No, he probably is not dominant. He is what we refer to as a wannabe power tripper that is in it for all the wrong reasons. ...
This excerpt reminds me of a very important aspect I overlooked -- one person's submissive is another person's pushover, which only further emphasizes the fact that people [not men or women] need to better understand what the hel they want and what they offer before they go off complaining that they can't seem to hit their target.
I agree wholeheartedly with Sherilyn70's view -- there i a difference between being 'in control' and being 'a controlling person.' Between 'submissive' and 'passive,' or 'follower' and 'spineless.' | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 11:00:59 PM | I HATE submissive women.... one of my exes would just lie there like a dead fish every time we had sex.
I don't think is submissive, sounds more like lazy to me.  | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 11:57:29 PM | A truly sexually dominate man is hard to find. Some men are dominate because they don't really like women and need the control, some are sadist who need to cause pain to get off.
To me it's all about the mind f**k associated with it and finding someone who can pull it off is difficult. | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/10/2008 11:59:05 PM | | I want an equal partner, not some abused chick who has a daddy fetish. If you want to be used for a coffee table and ordered to walk five feet behind your man in public, I am not your guy. Call it whatever you want, but games are games and I do not play them. | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/11/2008 12:01:49 AM | dont know wut u guys mean, im seeking a guy who can rough me up in bed, i also have a rape fantasy i wanna b taken, u know, i dont know how to explain it LOL i jus want meet sum1 who i can b comfortable enough to do these things with
This is not necessarily the same thing as being a submissive. I have a friend who likes me to be rough with her, not hitting her or anything like that, but she likes to be taken and handled roughly during sex. I have no problem with that. But she is anything but submissive on a normal basis. | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/11/2008 12:26:05 AM | custis, i have no daddy fetish, nor do i wanna walk behind a man in public, wtf are u talkin bout, maybe u should read all of my posts to understand me before u judge me... i am sayin that i am very submissive and just beacause u dont understand what i meant by submissive, CUZ I HAVE EXPLAINED IT THOROUGHLY, doesnt mean u have to judge me....
also ty, i am very secure in my sexuality and i agree with u, u have to b very secure to submit to anyman, and u must trust this man, ps ur hot can i have ur number, maybe u can pull my hair and spank me LOL
kisses
carly | |
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| submissive women
Posted: 3/11/2008 1:10:09 AM | | give me a woman who'll bend over whilst i pull her head back by her hair and do her hard and deep from behind whilst calling her a dirty lil slvt and i'm in heaven. i luuuuuuurve submissive women | |
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