| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/8/2008 11:27:11 AM | Yeah i think about her, and remember how self important ad lazy she was, and how glad i am that i threw her out, moved house and no longer have any traces of her lol, well it was 4 years ago  never look back, just look forward to what could happen next | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/8/2008 12:16:40 PM |
My ex now is remarried, and sometimes maybe once or twice a month calls or texts me. there was a time I jumped at his call or I'd ck the phone every 10 to 15 min hoping he'd text. there was a big part of me hoping that one day he'd "see the light" and realized that I truly loved him for him, flaws, farts and all! LOL but I just got tired of being let down..tired of his head games when he still calls and I have put myself on a Ex-Detox. ..just no longer allowing myself to text or take his call. He's supposed to be a newlywed and calling me? No..cant have it. so Im slowly but surely getting stronger . Pray for me and my continued strength ya'll...as I will do the same for everyone else!
Believe you me, before you know it you'll be legitimately glad that you did not end up with that "man." I honestly think that a lot of men simply like to feed their egos and want to feel wanted... even if they don't want you. They want to feel like they have choices waiting in the wings, and that by being with someone they are breaking someone else's heart.
A lot of men also think they are much better catches than they are and imagine that women are hitting on them. For instance, I attended a networking event awhile ago, and ended up having what I thought was a normal conversation with one of the facilitators, a man about 15 years my senior and nondescript looking. I see this same person at the registration table of an event several weeks later, and say, "hi, I met you at..." Instead of saying "oh yes, hi" this man promptly starts talking rather loudly and defensively about his wife, as though I were trying to hit on him. As if. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/8/2008 2:04:26 PM | | All of mine cross my mind at some point or another. I hope they're all doing fine and I wish them nothing but happiness. I never think about "what if".... they are the past and the past is where they will remain. There was obviously a reason they became an ex in the first place, please remember this. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/8/2008 2:12:51 PM |
Some tines I try to think about how it could have work, then I think about why it didn't work and I have a conclusion that I must live with. Not something I feel great about, but life goes on and I must live with it. It could not have worked.
you know quitecowboy, i feel the same way. i just hope she's happy about her decision.
and part of me (the vindictive side) wishes i were around just incase it all crashes down around her so i could go "there i hope your happy!!" but in time i'll get over it and look back at this and just go: "what was i stressing about?" | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 11:58:53 AM | Tinag35, I tried to message you directly, but your settings do not allow for that, so I just wanted to respond to what you said in this discussion:
I have put myself on a Ex-Detox. ..just no longer allowing myself to text or take his call. He's supposed to be a newlywed and calling me? No..cant have it. so Im slowly but surely getting stronger . Pray for me and my continued strength ya'll...as I will do the same for everyone else!
Good for you! sometimes you have to put yourself on a "detox" -- there are definitely some boundary issues in what you described. You cannot heal until you let yourself completely get past "him" in your head. He made a choice in life, for whatever reason, which includes NOT being with you, so your only option was and is to pick up your life and again start living -- make it your own. He does not deserve a place in your life. Don't give him a second thought, and move your gaze forward. It sounds like you've had and continue to have some great friends in your life who love you and are willing to give you a hand toward wholeness. Take it, and don't let your ex be part of your journey to re-discover all the joy that can be in this life. This is not a call to bitterness -- quite the contrary. As the song says, breaking up is hard to do. Once it's done, concentrate on building your single life and your friendships, and when you are ready, you'll find love again. I wish you all the best, and will definitely put you in my prayers.
As for the rest of you who've posted, I'll add my $.02: I made a conscious decision years ago (amidst the active pain of separation and divorce) to "own" my memories, my stories, my life, even though a large portion of my story included my ex. That decision, that HARD WORK, was perhaps one of the most valuable gifts I ever gave myself. Subsequently, my ex has never been an issue in any relationship I've had since, and I've gained confidence in the healing that eventually came with time and active introspection. It took a lot of time before I didn't' think about my ex, but somehow suddenly the years melted past and now I don't even think of him around our wedding anniversary ("when is that, again?! LOL) or his birthday -- feels GREAT! I wish him well, and am and would be completely civil and friendly if we had continued contact, but he's not and has not been for a long time an active part of my thoughts. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 12:00:42 PM | | I still think about some of my exes, but I don't want them back. They had good qualities that I can fondly recall or else I never would have dated them. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 12:09:15 PM | Yes i do. As time goes by more and more lately. Have a great guy in my life at present a gentleman, however i have no contact with my ex (no kids) but i do find myself angry that here i am wondering what he is doing at that present time?
Why do we do this, does anyone know? | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 1:12:29 PM | notforyou,
I ALWAYS think about my ex since I lost her to cancer, but they are cherished memories that help me be a better partner for an equally wonderful woman in the future.
I will never forget her, not love her, not be grateful to have loved her, or cherish my every memory of her, but at the same time I don't measure the new women I meet by her in any way. They are individuals with a whole new personality, and little quirks, that will intrigue me once I meet the one I will end life with whoever she is.  | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 2:03:30 PM | | I do think of my ex from time to time. We split up still loving each other but we drifted so far apart and after years of working hard to stay together, I think we each gave up trying. I miss being in love with someone and having that closeness. Is the grass greeener....probably not. Finding someone who moves us shouldnt be an easy thing. Its the rarity of it which makes it special. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 9:19:18 PM | yes i do, I think about him allot. I miss him still but don't want him back. I have
moved on with out him, but I still love him and always will. He wasnt my husband but
someone I loved as much as. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 10:23:16 PM | absolutely not. doesn't even enter my mind unles someone brings it up for me to recall.
i even prefer to have many months or a year or more between girlfriends so as to kinda get that virgin feeling. I forgot what it even feels like to hug. I don't even have a recollection of the other stuff..it's all absent. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 10:24:02 PM |
He wasn't very good to me, so I don't understand why I really care, I just know that I do
its pretty simple..because most women like jerks.... full stop ..and most women will never admit to that either.. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/14/2008 10:27:31 PM | | well its pretty natural for people to think about someone that they were with..you just have to be strong andnot get carrie away with your thoughts and not get caught up in the situation and learn to move on..i too still think about some of the girl i was with in the past..hell i even think about girls that i just "dated" or were with "casually".. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/15/2008 12:54:29 AM | Jim Croce, "Every now and then I find myself thinking about the days when we were walking in the Alabama rain."
...we were running horses on the west Galveston beach. Fond memories is what I have. Wasn't always that way. It's cool imo when you get over missing certain things. Now it's 'happy we had that time.' And life rolls on. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/15/2008 1:22:13 AM | | I do sometimes but I think that happens when you spend any significant amount of time with someone and they become part of your life. Inevitably there will be memories that contain that person in them. For me personally I miss the life I had and the person I thought he was at one point. But that's just it, the person I thought he was, that's the person that the life was created with and that person doesn't exist anymore. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/15/2008 1:25:15 AM | No I dont.
A ex is a ex for a reason.
It was me that walked.
I wish him well.
He gave me three great Children (now grown)
He has now remarried and Im pleased for him.
He wasnt a bad guy just not for me. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/17/2008 10:04:55 AM | | out of sight, out of mind. There's always a reason why an EX should stay in the past. Nope and I'm interested getting back with an ex. I wish him all the best in life. Its better this way and more healthier to move on. Personally, its alot harder to stay friends with an ex - there's mind games involved. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 3/17/2008 10:56:37 AM | | everyone thinks about thier ex... just as we think about other things in our past like from high school and such.. when you date someone they become a part of your life, you make memories with that person, you get bonded to them... then in the end we have our reasons for letting go of them. i truely believe each and every person who we let our walls down to shapes us into who we are today. i think about my first boyfriend of 5 years.. i even think about the guy i could of had if i gave him a shot. i think about old friends.... you just remember thinking about you ex cause you dont really want to think about him. i bet if you look back you remember friends and such too but he just sticks out like a sore thumb. its ok to think and remember.. we are only human with emotions. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 4/6/2008 8:54:52 AM | I think we all broke up with our 'exes' because we did believe the grass to be greener -- even if greener was being single for some!
I don't think about my ex wife at all. I did date a woman on and off for a while and finally put the end to it this year, and think about her once in a while. She was a very rare catch, but for very good reason, she and I aren't together. The next woman I end up with will be just as rare of a catch as her, and with good reason! Don't we all deserve the very best person for us? If they grew on every local tree, this site wouldn't exist. That having been said, I think it's a normal part of the moving on process -- the issue lies in whether we stay in the past while trying to move on. | |
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| Do you still think about your ex?
Posted: 4/6/2008 9:07:16 AM | i think about my ex husband for the fact we have kids together. his feelings and views have to be taken into account pertaining to them.
i think about only one other person from way back when. would i have him back? only person i know i would have back.
on the other side of the coin, dont know anyone would have me back LOL | |
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