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Kate97
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Joined: 5/12/2008
Msg: 226 | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 5/28/2008 4:27:48 PM | i agree with you completely, the only reason i wouldn.t put my pic on line is because i don,t want the men out there intimidated by my size right off the bat, even though im looking for friends and e-mail buddies, i,ve found that once they see you,they never e-mail you again, i,ve had some pretty good guys tthat i talked back and forth with for awhile,i posted my pic for to days mind you, and that was it,
i was told i was pretty but large, myself i look at the person for who they are and not what they look like, i call me pleasely plump.lol but like i said im not after a relationship so it dosn,t bother me, and im happy with myself and thats what matters to me, and my photo was only 2days old, thats ok, if we were all the same the world would be worse off than it is now, i guess they think all women should be
perfect, i,ve seen alot of these men and what they want in a women and their not to great them selves, | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 5/29/2008 1:50:34 AM |
what is wrong with people????????
or is it me??
Honest answer?
Both.
We're all at fault.
You have certain expectations... they have certain expectations... and never the twain shall meet.
The online world is fundamentally no different than the offline one... it's just not as awkward to ignore or reject someone. That's really one of the only true differences... it's not even easier to lie.... unless, you are talking about pictures... You can make up total fantasy about you and your life whether you are typing on a keyboard or siting next to them at a bar... door number 1 or door number 2... SSDD... same shit different day.
At least online I don't have to listen to the 5th playing of Freebird on the juke... not that that's a bad song... Nor do I have to see drunken women rub up against anything that is body temp or warmer... nor guys who think that proving their worth entails speaking as loud as possible and pushing other guys... Now that I think about it... online dating or maybe a library is definitely superior. Less chance of a shiny shirt overload anyway....
Okay, getting back to the previous junk.
If it's really all about... well... peacock plumage and pithy lines... well... than a lot of us are screwed.
It seems like we have these preconditions... criteria... set rules... time frames... limits... preconceived ideas and notions... it just leads to a search that becomes lengthened to a point where you want to give up... or think there is nothing out there... but, there is so vast... and you are so small...
the giggleparts - A light burning and set to the horizon... | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 5/29/2008 3:11:10 AM | It's up to you how you go about this stuff... a photo is useful if you are seriously dating... but some people on the net are chancing their luck and they may have a gorgeous pic or none... so be warned.. and some are not confident, some are pig ugly... some are beautiful and dont want to be wanted for their looks... and so they may not have a photo... some may not want to jeopardise their career, their life... it's complicated stuff.
you just have to work your way thru it all. Carefully and slowly and go with your gut instincts, but don't stand for dumb excuses... if someone has a pc and is online they are smart enough to put a pic online... and if they say they dont have a camera.... well... come on.. they wouldnt be able to afford to meet you... or they have no mates to share a camera with, or no mobile to take them on...
oh just stand your ground, ask what you like... photo issue, any issue... just be you and dont lower your expectations... if someone likes you they will deliver. | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 5/29/2008 10:34:12 AM | I think a lot of people are a bit delusional. There is a thread about a TV show ruining dating and that's scary. I find people have a hard time grasping reality. As far as not liking larger people, well America is getting larger. There is a bigger difference between what is seen in entertainment and what is to be had in real life.
As far as looks go, I know of MANY people who have fallen love with people they would never thought they could have clicked with. It happens quite a bit. I dated a pilot who was great, but I NEVER thought I would date a pilot. Who knew they could be so well-read?
I think with Internet dating, people make snap judgements based on photos. | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/1/2008 5:57:25 PM | you know you hit the nail on the head, people do make snap judgements based on a persons photo, and its ashame that they don,t take time to get to know the real person, i don,t like being judged for my looks, but for the way i treat a person.
i think you can be a plus size and still be very attractive, as long as you take care of yourself, and it dosn,t mean all plus size people are unhealthy. i hate excerise but
the type of work i do i get exercise all day long, im not saying i don.t like men that don,t look good, but when they over do it, it takes away the attractiveness i think. | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/1/2008 6:15:07 PM | | hi ive been talking with this guy from here and on his profile its all lies he say he was 43 but his 47 i asked him y did he lie no ans but if u lie about something so stupid what else r u lieing about? well i was thinking of meeting him until one day i didnt ans the phone and he called me all kind of names like what the hell ,,anyways some1 in poh has told me about this guy that he is a abuser of women thanks to this person ive didnt meet him,,also he has a gf which in his profile he didnt say that and he has kids so what the hell y do so many ppl lie on here i dont understand it,,, | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/1/2008 10:17:02 PM | Lorraine65, I get guys lying about age quite a bit and I agree. I remember this one guy told me he was 47 and we started to talk about high schools. Well, he went to the same high school as my cousin and was the same age. I asked him what year he graduated from high school and he said, "'67." I asked him if he graduated when he was seven and he said, "no, 17." That made him 57 and not 47 if he graduated in '67. He laughed when I pointed this out to him. I would not have minded his age if he had not lied to me.
Why lie? | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/1/2008 10:37:27 PM | Hello.... when did you graduate from school, i.e. GRADE SCHOOL! Did you NOT learn to spell ? 2 is spelled two, i've has a capital I, and so on. Just because this is an on-line forum does not mean that grammer and/or punctuation can take a flying leap off a f23kin' bridge. This is not to say that you don't have a valid point. It is my policy that if the guy doesn't have a picture attached to his bio or his email he DOES NOT get a responce from me. The old addage of 'what is good for the goose is good for the gander ' still holds true.
Or am I just out of sinque with the rest of the universe? | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/2/2008 12:07:16 AM | medana, you are so right on the money. I laughed at your comment about the nagging machine already attempting to wear you down, and you aren't even dating them yet .. that is hilarious but it is SO true! I always think of women being the naggers because that is the stigma that has been stuck to us, but .. the men can be just as bad. I think the worst thing is when you get repeated emails from someone who you have not had a chance to respond to but their subsequent emails ask you why you haven't responded yet.... "was it something I said?" ... and you are getting apologies for their last email content ... ??? ...I'm thinking, like, wow, give me a chance to get at it ... The pressure that some men give you is unbelievable .. trying to convince you that they are for you when, really, they are your complete opposite. I don't get it. I appreciate their courage for going after something but don't they realize that you and them are maybe not a match? It would be like me trying to snag a man who is looking for the complete opposite of myself ... I couldn't do it. I wouldn't even want to put myself in the position to be shot down if I knew I wasn't even close to what they were looking for. Lately, I've had (much younger) men try to be convincing that even if they ARE literally half your age, that they can relate to your life experience and be your partner .... PLEASE. !! Stop. !!
Everyone has their preferences .. and I totally respect others' preferences.  | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/2/2008 5:18:11 AM | "got an email today from a guy that asked me out on a date, only he has very little info on his profile, and no image."
You did the right thing....Dont ever meet someone without a photo...he said he dosnt have a photo...But he has one on his moble site.he is full of sh*t.Look's may not matter...but you never know what weirdo is out there. | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/2/2008 5:40:56 AM | | Every day is Idiot Day on POF. Don't let them bother you, they are morons. I don't have that happen since I hid my profile and changed it to say I don't want to meet anyone from here. LOL | |
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| outrageous expectations from online daters
Posted: 6/2/2008 5:54:45 AM | 1dotdash, I don't think I'd be handing out critiques of anyone's spelling and grammar if I were you.
"Hello.... when did you graduate from school, i.e. GRADE SCHOOL!" is not a grammatically correct sentence, and it's incorrectly puncutated.
"grammer" is spelled GRAMMAR.
"responce" is spelled RESPONSE.
"addage" is spelled ADAGE.
"sinque" is spelled "SYNC"
Hope that helps. | |
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