| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 9:59:25 PM | OMG Margo.........1950's home economics, that is great that you could resurrect something like that. Too funny Margo, thanks for sharing that with us.
Those type of articles were plastered throughout magazines in that era. How to keep and please your man.........ad agencies and department store sales florished on that concept alone.  | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 10:10:49 PM | | I would keep the birth of rock and roll, the music of the love jungle, the beat of sex, of youth rising hot and nasty to the postmodern rhythm. And robots. I'd keep the frickin' robots! | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 10:28:57 PM | If a woman wants to marry young and be a full-time mom, she can still do it. Nobody can stop her, and yes, there are men who want precisely that kind of marriage.
But to go back to the times when this was the only option available to women? No way. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 10:44:12 PM | I actually disagree that "the younger geberation" don't understand their roles--I think it's the 40-50 yr olds who THINK there are roles, and there are none any more.
I also do not think "yong women are angry and frustrated with the women's movement". The truly young girls don't think twice about it--it's so a part of the past (your youth), it's like the VietNam War: it's history.
I suspect YOU, OP, are projecting. If you want to be a June Cleaver type (umm, that's TV, not real life, did you know that?), and you want to try to find a Ward Cleaver for yourself, try it. Good luck with that? | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 10:49:25 PM | CassaGo...........I am not a June Cleaver wanna be. My post is out of concern for the younger generation who have posted on these forums. Don't attack the messenger!!
I myself, would not want to live the life that women had in the 1950's, and I am thankful for my career and the choices I have today. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 10:54:33 PM | I'd like to add that in regard to the "How to Be a Good Wife" list, there's an article on Snopes.com which has it listed as "undetermined", meaning it could very well be a fabrication. http://www.snopes.com/language/document/goodwife.asp
If it is indeed a myth, it would go to show the opposite era to idealizing the past: making our forefathers appear barbaric and ignorant to show how far we've "progressed".
SkinThief said in his litany of why the 1950's sucked for women:
Women had no reproductive rights at all
Wouldn't it necessarily follow that men had no "reproductive rights" either? It takes two to tango. Similarly:
Women had narrow roles in society, oh, but there was that PTA and Home Makers thing to look forward too.
Men had "narrow" roles in society as well. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 10:55:16 PM |
A lot of the younger generation say they are confused about their male/female roles in today's society and have no sense of direction.
Going back to the 50s isn't the right solution. I grew up in that time. Yes, there were some good homemakers. Actually, raising my children in the 70's I had a few stay-at-home mom parents of my children's friends. Women I had a lot of respect for because they did treat motherhood and homemaker as a profession. They saved more than enough money to offset the amount of take home pay they would have had after all job expenses. Made some craft money, too. Another made babysitting money.
On the other hand, I knew several non-productive people who were not engaged in being homemakers or mothers. Just lazy slobs sucking the life out of their husbands. Then there were the rest of us. Working ..., and also being soccor moms and camping moms and science projects and all the other activities that kept our kids fit and mentally active and growing. Those of us who had home cooked meals at least 6 nights a week and packed healthy lunches each day.
The myth of Ozzie and Harriet (who were actually both working actors who turned their kids into working actors) is that most women didn't work. It just wasn't true. It was more common in the 50s ... but not as common as many think. In the 30's everyone was scrapping what they could due to the depression. In the 40's the men went to war and the women went to work. In the early 50's many women worked during Korea. However, go back to before 1900 and you'll see that only a very few of the wealthy women didn't have paying jobs ... and they did volunteer work.
The fact is that with enough children to care for parenting can be a full time job. Or, an executive husband who needs and executive hostess might be a full time job. But, for the most part, there is not enough to do for a full time job .... and not being a productive member of society does suck away the self-esteem over time. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 11:26:33 PM | Msg 34, Jacobus 101.......... you make a good point but could you please expand on your line of thinking.
Men in the 1950's had reproductive rights.........it was perfectly legal to force his wife to have sex (rape) causing her to have more children than she could comfortably handle.
Women had narrow roles in the 1950's........... it was a 24/7 job due to lack of conveniences and men not taking ownership of their paternal responsibilities. Raising children was considered the mother's job.........and father was considered the authoritarian/disciplinarian.
Men had narrow roles in the 1950's............there job typically ended after 40-44 hours per week and they took care of the home maintenance if they were mechanically inclined, otherwise they paid for a tradesman to do it for them.
Anyway..........I am getting off topic and still looking for those young people who wish for the return of traditional roles and to hell with what the feminists say......if that is what they choose....no one has the right to ridicule them. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/4/2008 11:49:13 PM | I am sure that some folks in the 1950s could be found sitting around
discussing how the Good Old Days, before TV, automobiles,
Unions, refrigeration, in-door plumbing and Women's Suffrage were so much better !
Things were easier to understand in the 1900s, back in The Old Country!
“Ward ! You have to speak to The Beaver ! I found a comic book under his mattress
and a Commie under his bed !” | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 12:30:25 AM | I tend to agree with post 6, 9 and 13.
The 50s has Cold War, McCarthy, etc.
Except for The Fonz and a prep time for the late 60s, the rest of the 50s are better left to Beaver!
The 1960s, the 1480s and the 460s BC were way better! | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 1:50:12 AM | Darrr asked:
Msg 34, Jacobus 101.......... you make a good point but could you please expand on your line of thinking.
Men in the 1950's had reproductive rights.........it was perfectly legal to force his wife to have sex (rape) causing her to have more children than she could comfortably handle.
I just mean that the extra children which result from extra sex are still his to worry about, assuming he doesn't become a deadbeat. He may have not seen them during the day, but he still has to support them with his paycheck and raise them when he's at home.
And about spousal rape, true, there was no law against husbands raping their wives. But there was also no law against wives raping their husbands, or otherwise abusing them. We're talking about a time period that had less laws in general and less legal micromanagement of the household. And it's perfectly possible for the wife to want more children than the husband and force non-contraceptive sex out of him one way or the other.
And finally, your OP is asking about reverting to 1950's-style relationships, not the 1950's themselves. In other words, we'd still have our laws as of March 2008 AD.
Which reminds me...... answering that original question, you have to remember that "traditional gender roles" is somewhat subjective in itself. I mean, it was only after the Industrial Revolution that the average husband and father actually left home to go to work. Before then, husband and wife worked in the same trade together (farming, blacksmithing in a shop under the house, etc.) with the kids helping too, when they were old enough. So in one sense, the Industrial Revolution messed traditional gender roles up royally by taking the man away from home and making the woman feel abandoned for a great part of the day.
A similar take can be made in regard to women's suffrage. In the early 20th century, it seemed to be a sexist law that women couldn't vote. But that situation was never going to last long, anyway. We have to remember that at one time, ordinary men couldn't vote either. When the nation was first built, voters had to be property-owning Anglo men. This typically ruled out single and landless bachelors, celibate Catholic priests and monastics, virtually all non-Anglo immigrants, and of course, any man who didn't have property. But if you think about it, in pre-industrial America, that law made a lot of sense. Naturally, the people who owned and built America would have the say in government. Also, it was implied that any of these men who voted also spoke on behalf of their wives, so there was no need for women to vote because it would just double the amount of ballot paper used.
Anyway, as for me, I'd be all for traditional gender roles in regard to work, if the wife agrees. Or actually, to be honest, I wish I could have gotten married after high school and become a stay-at-home dad. Sure, I'm planning on going to law school and all, but that's really only so my future wife can stay home and not have to worry about being broke. I'm not a career-oriented man at heart. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 2:57:19 AM |
Stick with "Does this dress make me look fat?" We have learned how to deal with that one.
We lie and say no
You have much to learn Grasshopper......
The correct answer is, "Baby, you look hot!" | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 3:06:57 AM | As the child of a single Mom from the 50's, I can only say, no, no HELL no, no going back......
If girls today are actually doubting the gains that were made by the "Evil Feminist Movement"......they have no idea what it's like to live in a world where it's legal to be fired from your job just for being pregnant, it's legal to be denied an apartment because you're a single female without a man to "vouch" for you, it's legal to be refused credit or a home mortgage - again, just because of gender. I still experienced some of those issues in the early 80's when I moved away from home. Women of the 50's (who weren't wealthy) had no way to live in this world without a man to "sign" for them.
Putting all the responsibility for making a living on the man can be an unbearable burden. When things go wrong, as they usually do somewhere along the way, the pressure can totally destroy a man. I saw it happen to my dad. I even saw how it difficult it was for my ex when my career went further than his.
Nope, no going back. That way lies madness..... | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 5:06:45 AM |
So back to the times and lives of "Ozzie and Harriet", "Leave it to Beaver" and "Father Knows Best"
Hello? These were TV shows. As in fake. As in not real life. Your rosy glowy idea of life in the 50s is based on myth, not reality. Women can do whatever they like today - it's bull to blame their actions on 'society'. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 5:51:49 AM | That is exactly my point Merrylass.........those TV programs were far from being an accurate depiction of what life in the 1950's was offering, but the fact remains that there are both young men and women in today's society who would like the return of the "traditional roles" without being ridiculed by the rest of society for their choices.  | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 6:50:09 AM | I actually disagree that "the younger geberation" don't understand their roles--I think it's the 40-50 yr olds who THINK there are roles, and there are none any more.
I feel that my generation has been effected too. We're one of the "in between" generations.
The way I see it- we're still in a period of social transition that won't see its end until the children of the originators have children.
Basically, if you were raised by people who were on that last group that have very little choice in what they could and couldn't do, you're going to have conflicting views. (And let's not forget the reruns of old 50s and 60s tv show that showed them as the perfect way to live. This happened in the 80s.... so the idea of "mom staying at home" was still, according to TV reruns, perfect.
(My mom worked as a night nurse for a lot of my childhood so that she could be at home. 5 in the evening until after I went to bed. After I started school I went to a baby sitter... but I feel like I had a pretty "TV" life until I started school.)
So I feel like I was brought up around conflicting ideas of what life was supposed to be like. It certainly DOES create confusion. (Though I found that a lot of people I know, myself included, took a long time to figure out what their lot in life was.)
Though one could argue that gender roles have always been complicated.
That is exactly my point Merrylass.........those TV programs were far from being an accurate depiction of what life in the 1950's was offering, but the fact remains that there are both young men and women in today's society who would like the return of the "traditional roles" without being ridiculed by the rest of society for their choices.
There isn't that much of a stigma. Most people prevent themselves from doing things like this because they have some fear that everyone will laugh at them. That isn't the case at all. And even if it were, who cares what other people think?
I would recommend, though,that they stay active in their community. My grandmother was a house wife... and my grandfather died in the 80s. She didn't have a lot of friends... and was very lonely for a long time. And now she's in a nursing home, and she's starting to outlive the connections that she did have. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 7:47:26 AM | Northeast .. Is this the piece you are referring too? ( msg 26 )
Yes it is. According to that article, back then the husband's needs and desires were more important the wife's needs and desires. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 1:36:02 PM | | Ms Kame; Go a read a copy of "The Feminine Mystique" - the how-to and Bible for most young women who married in the 1950's and tell me that you would trade what you have now for that. Fine, Kame's family was one of the exceptions to the norm. Now, nobody pay attention to Kame. Everything I posted previously is still valid. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 2:01:46 PM | | There is NO way that I would have preferred to live in the 1950s. I have a college degree, a great job, own a house etc. All things that might not have happened in the 1950s simply because I'm a woman. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 2:16:22 PM | Self Respect!
Time travel to 1950s, come back to the present, bring along respect for the
working people,[men & women].
This is the foundation where people can again believe that it isn't GREED
that rule's, that GET MINE mentality.
Societal breakdown is not new, our's is not unique, past societies have
fallen from within.
Think of it, soon, money is worthless, NO ONE can pay bill's, get a job,
is thie NEW? NO! 1929 REMEMBER?
People are unable to maintain 'KEEP the FAITH' attitude .
R-E-S-P-E-C-T like the song say's.
Would go a long way to dispel....DISILLUSIONMENT. | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 2:31:04 PM | Hi, Darr (like the name)!
Let's see...No civil rights for minorities, Lester Maddox, Chicago riots...wait...that was also the early 60s!
You and I were born in the 1950s, Darr. The only thing I remember about the late 50s was going with my dad to buy cigars when my younger sister was born.
I agree with another poster: Those sure weren't Happy Days!
But, I do like the question you asked. It gets people to think for themselves!
Take care! | |
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| If relationships could revert to the 1950's era......
Posted: 3/5/2008 2:33:43 PM | | Ya know, I may get criticized for this, but I would love to stay at home and have babies, cook, clean and run the household, having supper ready when my husband came home from work. I mean, what did we ever do without computers, TiVo, cellphones and all this technological crap? My grandmother was an amazing woman with 8 children... sewing their clothes, gardening, cooking, baking... and all that jazz... I just wish the option was there for a single income family full of love and respect. | |
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