| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/4/2004 1:02:27 PM | | Oh stop it! How much reassurance do you need.....probably not much more than the rest of us!! Get out more like me forthebeauty said.....there's loads of people out there like you AND me.........GET A GRIP!!......we ALL have a responsibility for ourselves.......DON'T expect anyone else to do stuff for YOU...........DO IT FOR YOURSELF!! NOW!!!!! | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 52 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/4/2004 1:40:27 PM | | i've had to lower my age requirements continusely in order to not upset the younger girls that i'm friends with on the forums...i definately don't want to sleep with them...but i do value their friendship. And i do agree with you silken..women do think more because i've been question by women who contacted me and had to explain my age requirements and also my voting history. hey, just because i teenager pops up on the rate my pic section..dos'nt mean i can rate her...Give a guy a break | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 53 | |
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| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/4/2004 2:15:15 PM | Hey All!
I appologize if this has been said as i didn't have time to read the whole thread.. but the main question i think i can still answer. And it's simple... YOU ARE ONLY AS BEAUTIFUL AS YOU FEEL.
My ex-wife, used to tell me that if she had on the SEXIEST outfit, but the ugliest underwear... should wouldn't feel sexy. This of course.... i could always tell afterwards .... based soly on her actions during that day. I'd be like.... " no clean ones eh hun? You know your still gorgeous though babe".... i could say that all night and it would take hours sometimes before she could loosen up a bit and see her real beauty. I'll be honest... she was always gorgeous to me.
Now... sexy underwear (hopefully a thong :P), she said would make her feel sexy in ANYTHING! And i swear this is true!
Point is... unless you feel sexy and find that good pair of underwear... it will be hard for anyone else to do the same.
Now... on a side note... when i say "sexy", i mean attractive, wanted, goodlooking, and anything else that goes along.
I hope this helps bud. Best of luck
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| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/4/2004 2:22:18 PM | Actually... i'll elaborate a little more
What i wrote above is based on karma. People can read how you feel all the time. Most people do it unconciously and just reacte without knowing it. But Karma is character... if your happy, your emotions, actions and attitude will reflect with your every day behaviors ie. work... school... love.... what ever.
So... why should you try to feel sexy? So that people know, that YOU believe you are. Confidence as many have already said... is a part of that karma reflection.
Maybe i'm reading way too much into this.... maybe i'm totally nuts...then again......... | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 56 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/4/2004 6:01:09 PM | W6: My advice is to expand your age range for contact before a protest, complete with signs, breaks out. ;) Hey I'm not 40 yet but I still say the 40+ crowd like cars. too. :P Now are you going to comply or do I have to get backup? ;) hehehehe
Chuck: Thanks for the credit dear. ;)
Sexycowboy: Enjoyed your posts. Now I know why I wear clean underwear everyday. ;) Hey I have certain bras I feel sexier in.... only problem is that the sexiest ones are also the ones it's difficult not popping out of. ;)
silken | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/4/2004 10:22:43 PM | WS6TA,
I believe you're very much in error by maintaining it's your "looks" as the reason "...you gals find me undesirable...."
Look closely at the text of your profile. It's a sales pitch. Not 'who you ARE', or what you want, but rather 'what you can DO'. Back off, open up, be real...you'll be surprised. | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 58 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 1:15:38 PM | E52INFLRRP: thanks for the feed back bud.
Life, especially the dating world is nothing more than a sales pitch. You are trying to sell a product (Yourself) to a potential customer (Woman). If the product looks bad then customes will pass by. If the product has defects it will be passed over. How often has any of us not noticed that a first date or the events leading up to a first date. Is so much like filling out a job application?
Seriously: I created my profile merely as an act of humor. I felt like I need something different than the average boring profiles we all typically see. You know My name is ______ I live here in blah blah and I do blah blah for a living, I'd like to meet a blah blah woman... I think you get my point now. I was only trying to show that I have a sense of humor. A quality some women seem to say they like? I can be very serious too if given the opportunity, as well as very romantic, I'm typically very polite and practice good manners as much as I can. Sometimes you do have to play hard ball with some people because they won't accept the fact that some of us are truly decent and feel that decent men are out to control the female population... That's such bull it nearly makes me puck. My mother has had work in a man's world for many years and I have seen what she has to put up with so I think I understand the situation pretty clearly and therefor always give women equal billing. If I'm confronted with A-hole it doesn't matter if they are female or male then I have every right to treat them as they are treating me... It's not something I fancy but one can't let those type of people walk all over you either...
What else could it be other than my looks? I fit the bill in every other way that women are seeking in a man... So, it all comes back down to looks... I send out e-mail after e-mail to girls I'm interested in and never get a reply. The only one's whom ever return my e-mails is someone I merely contacted to say hi or discuss something other than a date... | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 1:57:22 PM |  The fact that you have not dated in the a while never really truly has anything to do with you looks.
Some of the reasons why we don't have anyone asking us out or dating other people is that some of us don't really advertise that we are looking. Seeking a mate is almost another job search... you have to be in a place where they can find you... You have to market yourself well. This means be in a good mood, be easy to be with, find something to laugh about and enjoy the hunt. Searching for a mate may take a while but the one you find will be worth the chase. Sometimes don't give up so easy, sometimes we say that we aren't interested and we are but afraid of the new and unexpected.
Just as change is different for most and most don't handle it well so is dating. There are some out there that dating is such and easy game and others it is hard. Dating is suppose to be fun and exciting. A new possiblity to a new friend or even a new romance. The attitude that we enter into dating is really what we get out of it.
If you're stress about dating then besure that someone else is picking up on it. Don't be afraid to spend a little cash on her, it will be worth the end result if she is worth it. The amount you spend on a great gal will not matter as the quality of the gift. We want to know that you bothered. So don't run in the store and grab something.. what does she like and what is important to her.
For instance.. I gave a guy a flower just to let him know that he was as beautifuls as a rose inside and out and that I was proud of him and his new job. It wasn't a lot but it came from me. I got flowers that week from a girlfriend who wanted me to know that I was special and that she was there for me. Trust what you give you will recieve. Yes, there are gold diggers and they usually show their face early in the game. Dump them because no one wants to be taken advantage of, including them.
Women want a man with a huge heart, who is free enough to share their feelings. Someone who we can trust,, Yes, looks matter but it is amazing when a guy is real and true that it shows through and the ugliest guy in the world can date a prom queen if his heart is right.
Enjoy who you are because you were created different from anyone else and you mate is out there.  | |
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| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 2:01:41 PM | Dude, your probably gettin more hits and feedback playin the "nobody loves me" thing than ever before.
Go out to a bar and find some chick who is puttin down to many and try that on her. | |
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alura2
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Joined: 3/18/2004
Msg: 61 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 2:13:55 PM | ignore that^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
i was with my ex for 8 yrs and after that i was inexperienced i n the dating game...i outgrew clubbing. PLus that and i have kids too..so ih yah im a catch.I didnt know how to date again...or if i was still sexy..or could attract still.
So..i went out with some gfs...got all dressed up and went to party. The looks..the atention...the beign asked to dance was such an ego boost.It made me feel good to know that yah..im still sexy.
I asked soem pals what had changed me. I was walking taller..i was smiling more..i dditn have that desperate searching look on my face..plus i didnt look like a dog in heat..
Confidence and a nice warm smile attracts.If you look like a woman has snakes i n her hair..or are a total snob...or even standoffish...you are SOL...
look further into that mirror..put on a dif pair of glasses..and see yourself differntly..what can you do 3 small things that you can do to yourself this week that help your attitude and appearnce??
think it over..and you will be surprised... | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 62 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 2:19:11 PM | I truly wish what you were saying was true...
I do go out but no one ever looks my way or will speak to me. I sometime's think do I look like the "Elephant man or worse?"
I'm not a negative person, I don't think poorly of myself. I'm nice and respectful. I'm also very funny and outgoing. However none of this seems to catch anyone's attention.
I'm only discussing the looks thing here as a possiblity of the cause for all the rejections? I don't feel I'm ugly, nor do I think of myself as the super hunk of the millienuem. I feel like I'm probably average... That being said leads me to have to ask the question if I'm okay looking then I should have had many women wanting to go out with me all of those dateless years. Yet, that isn't the case and thus begs the question: "Unattractive?" | |
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alura2
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Joined: 3/18/2004
Msg: 63 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 2:27:16 PM | hmmm you unattractive???
bullsh*t...i saw your pro...you are not!!!
do you think you are looking for the wrong kinds of girl maybe?? maybe you just havent realized you are going for the wrong ones.Tastes change.. we grow up and may be looking for another duplicate of our exes...but we really are looking for polar opposites.
My new bf is as different form my ex as night and daytime.Looks..personality..interests...likes and dislikes..its amazing. I look back on it..my bf is my perfect match.My ex hubby wasnt. Im amazed...when i compare.
Waht kind of women do you go for?? you must go for ther ones that you know will see you for your true colors...and not your wallet..your car...and needy b*tches.
You will find your princess..but remeber..you have to seell yourself well..you have to have a women feel honored to know you..you deserve that because you wil lknow you are so worthy... | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 64 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 2:56:02 PM | Alura2
Actually I keep the car hidden and rarely drive it. It is my toy not a chick getter at least the way I see it.
If for some strange reason some girl actually said yes to a date (This isn't going to happen of course but for the sake of arguement let's say it did.) Then she would be picked up in my "beater" that's my work vehicle. It's a worn out 1988 toyota pickup which the paint is about faded out. Not exactly a chick magnet is it? Besides if she could tolerate that then I would know for sure that she was truly interested in me.
Sure I talk about a show car in my profile but I rarely if ever bring it up in conversation. (To the best of my recollection this is the first time I've spoken of it in a thread) When I do go out on the town its in the truck. I don't go around announcing I have a flashy car in the nighclubs. I just be myself looking for someone being themselves.
I'm in totally agreement with the idealogy that opposites attract. I think those are the best relationships... I don't me completely opposites! There has to be some mutual ground of connection to make it last. However its the differances we admire the most in the other that truly sets them appart and thus the appeal of the attraction. I mean would we really be happy with someone exactly like ourselves? | |
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alura2
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Joined: 3/18/2004
Msg: 65 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 3:08:00 PM | my bf and i do have simialr intersts wich is great.He is more adventurous...wich was something i was lacking.He is a fun seeker where im more reserved.Im more quiet and snuggly while he wasnt.
We bring out the best in eachother..we needed eachother in some way..to share new thigns and new ways and to show our world to eachother. To be too alike can be tiring.
But to be different is exciting...he shows me diving...hiking..and i show him romantic things..quiet times...and a woman who is infatuated with her man.Something he never had.
So all in all we are made for eachther. | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 66 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 4:18:09 PM | Alura: I am so happy for you. :) Thank you for the posts, it's good to hear positive things and messages about changing our lives for the better! :)
Hersey: I enjoyed your positive post too! :)
W6: Man, you're not having a looks problem ok? ;) I think maybe you are just getting your foot stuck in your mouth maybe with women? ;) heheh I am only basing this on 2 things... 1) you're *not* unattractive and 2) even just in forums you've already riled up the women at least a couple times with comments (foot-stuck-in-the-mouth syndrome.) ;) I think you require female supervision (a favourite saying of mine)! ;)
Fullofsh*t: I hate your alias but I really liked your pics of you and the baby. Very nice. Interesting profile too. :)
silken | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 67 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 4:29:49 PM | Silken:
You may be right? However I don't hate women and why anyone would think this of me is really misreading me entirely. I never needed no legal law or documents to reckonise females deserved equal respect and protection. I truly think very highly of women and the struggles they must face in this world. But to judge me merely on the fact that I won't allow myself to be walked over by someone who just happens to be female. Would be denying me the same equal respect and protection you ladys feel your are entitled to.
I ask are we to believe that everyone except myself is entitled to the same rights?
So how about some of that female supervision? :) This is after all why I'm here and ask the questions. I'm not here to argue but to learn... | |
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| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 5:38:37 PM | | WS6TA I gotta tell ya. You ain't seen ugly my friend. I make you look like Adonis. I have pics of myself, that if I ever posted them with my profile, my rating would hit the negatives. Dude I'm only 4'1" (no I'm not a dwarf) and make John Merrick (The Elephant Man), look cute.But I don't pride myself on my looks. I know I'm not attractive and I'm ok with that. I AM however, a terrific guy on the inside, where it really counts. If someone liked me just because of my looks I wouldn't want that woman anyway. Shallowness is a very unattractive trait. People keep telling me not to worry because there is someone out there for me. I seriously doubt it, but hell, this site is free so I figured why not? Here's an exapmple of why it doesn't matter what you look like. I married a model. She was absolutely gorgeous. Turned out to be one of the ugliest beasts on the face of the planet! So like who you are on the inside and forget about what you are on the outside. Oh and P.S. Yes, lose the shirt!!!!!! LOL | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 69 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 5:46:20 PM |
You may be right? However I don't hate women and why anyone would think this of me is really misreading me entirely. I never needed no legal law or documents to reckonise females deserved equal respect and protection. I truly think very highly of women and the struggles they must face in this world. But to judge me merely on the fact that I won't allow myself to be walked over by someone who just happens to be female. Would be denying me the same equal respect and protection you ladys feel your are entitled to.
I ask are we to believe that everyone except myself is entitled to the same rights?
Dear W6, what are you talking about? I never said anything about you hating women or anything to do with rights. :) I don't knwo what you are referring to. :)
silken | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 70 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 5:54:45 PM | Geof3369:
LMAO :) Boy you all really dislike that shirt? Mom, sure is going to be disappointed, it was a christmas gift. What you all trying to get me in the doghouse with my mother? Don't you know never tick off your Mom... :LOL:
Actually the reason for the orginal question has a lot to do with many things I've been subjected too. Mainly, I asked it because on some of the paying dating websites. It records if you got a view and in order for someone to read your profile and not just look at your picture they have to click on to it. If they do then its recorded as a view and only then can they read what you say about yourself. Otherwise they only have the picture of you to weigh judgment. Seeing how I've been on several sites and some for years I find it hard to accept the fact no one ever views me. So therefore it can't be anything I'm saying about myself that is turning them off. It must be the guy in the picture (ME)?
Or maybe it's the shirt? :LOL:
Thanks for helping me out I apperciate it...
So what would you suggest I ware? My birthday suit? :LOL: | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 71 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 5:59:49 PM | Personally I love to see a guy shirtless and flexing his arms. ;) hehehe
silken | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 72 | |
| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 6:23:42 PM | Silken:
I was refering to your statement about me upseting women on other threads with my "comments." I mistakenly thought that was what you were trying to convey... | |
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| Re: Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 6:29:19 PM | I am a person who is not judgemental of others. True love comes from the inside, not what people look like. Maybe you should give everyone a chance. Maybe they aren't exactly what your ideal is, but if you get to know them, you might feel different. Be friends first. If you make a good friend and it does'nt go any further, so what. You made a new friend.
And by the way you are not ugly. Loosen up, a lot of people would be glad to go out with you.
Good luck | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 6:36:34 PM | | Dude read what you wrote here and youll see youre problem.I mean youre here to to date not make friends?That wont work you said it yourself with youre intrest in common speech the best relationships begin with friendship and grow from there.The rest is candy sweet to have but usually doesnt last and ends up in the crapper. | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 75 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 6:48:10 PM | chuckles_ram:
Your correct in part. I am here to date but only in the main site. In the forurms I'm here to discuss and learn if I make a friend here then that's cool but I'm not on the forums to look for a date but rather advice.
To the poster above you:
I agree somewhat in regards to what your saying is true. There is little doubt that your idea is correct. However, I firmly believe if there is no chemistry its a disservice to try and frabicate a false one in hopes that it will turn in to a guniune one. It's not only bad to subject yourself to such torture but a great misdeed to the other person whom is doomed to only get hurt. It's a far better thing you do to be upfront and honest that your not interested in them than attempt to lead them down a false road of hope. ( I say that from experience: for I tried it a couple of times and it's really really bad to play with peoples emotions in such a way.) | |
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