| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 7:02:51 PM | Sometimes chemistry is something that grows (or diminishes). I've met people I at first didn't find very attractive but as I got to know them they grew on me because of there characters. The opposite has also happened. First impressions of people can be very wrong. So I agree with the nicelady. Give women a bit more of a chance. Just because you don't instantly want to jump her bones doesn't mean she isn't someone you could be very happy with.
While I'm at it one other comment. You deserve a lot of credit for opening yourself up to the masses for scrutiny. At the same time it does make me wonder if one of your problems is that you over analyze things. Its good to be self critical sometimes but you don't need to over do it. | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 77 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 7:45:15 PM | I agree with Barn.... I have met guys who at first glance I didn't feel ****any**** attraction for and never thought I would (this was when I was younger and stupider ;) and yet a short time after knowing them I didn't know my name when they were near... I thought they were the sexiest men I ever met.
Sooooooooo the moral of this story is that I try to see any *decent* man who asks me out 3 times to see if getting to know them more will make me start feeling more for them before I say nay.
:)
silken | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/5/2004 11:28:04 PM | | sorry clarification I was talking about youre overall view not just in the forum.Ive read through some of youre other threads and you seem to say the same thing in several.youre a very shy person when you are attracted to a women .Join the club I stutter when faced with a women I like.However back to my point,You also state that you have no problem talking to women youre not attracted to. So do what I do ,try to treat a women you are attracted to the same way you would treat a friend the diologue may be a bit different but if people generally like you and are comfortable around you in general,Maybe you just need to relax around the ones you are atracted to. | |
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alura2
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Joined: 3/18/2004
Msg: 79 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 11:07:19 AM | | ok dude..go outside o n a great day in jeans and a white t- shirt..nothing beats looking relaxed and casual...take a nice pix and see what happens!! | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 80 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 12:18:59 PM | | Chukles: Good advice! But it's easier said than done... | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 1:04:54 PM | Stop feelin so low bro! Threads like this show low confidence... i only hope any of the women your intrested in don`t visit this thread. Your best bet is too take all the advice given so far and work with it. I`d close this thread as well... wallowing in self pitty never get`s the girl.
Ask yourself.... do YOU think your attractive? If your answer is no... then you have some issues you need to deal with before someone else can be part of you life.
If you said yes... then stop beating yourself up just because some of the women aren`t attracted to you. Be confident and have fun with it, and lastly respect anyone who doesn`t feel the same about you... | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 1:19:05 PM | WS6...
My original comment reflected what I 'saw' in your profile text. Frankly, I didn't see too much 'humor' in what was written...there wasn't anything to alert a reader that you were in fact joking around. Take a refresher course in humor/comedy, or change the text.
Secondly, your response to my comment points to another 'problem area'... The overall 'tone' I get is that you're a) feeling sorry for yourself, 2) 'down' on yourself (for some perceived inadequacy), or 3) both.
There IS a solution! Stop looking. ['Looking' will only beget what it is that you think you want, seldom seeing the whole package presented. Which can have drastic consequences farther down the road.] My suggestion: continue to email 'friendly' comment [to those who deserve such comment], don't EXPECT a reply - but if you get one consider keeping the 'conversation' going. Sooner, or later, a lady will 'see' the real you having investigated beyond what can be shown in the very short 'profiles' seen on this site (or others). The best (long-term) relationships are based upon a solid friendship...start developing the base(s) of such friendship(s), and then follow through. Chasing after the 'first indication of attractiveness' will seldom lead to a satisfactory conclusion. | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 83 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 1:49:19 PM | sexy_cowboy:
Thanks for the support it does me good to hear some people encourging me and it is helping a lot...
I'm not too concerned about some women seeing this thread and getting the wrong opinion. It's a shame that might happen but if they did then they wouldn't be anyone I would have been interested in anyway. It's not like my mail box is filling up or anything... I feel it takes a lot of courage to reveal that you do ask such questions, that your willing to express you have feelings, that your also willing to risk ridicule in order to learn to improve yourself.
The best part is that those women that might see this negatively are really going to miss out on one great guy. I'm begining my rebirth and I'm becoming stronger each minute of the day. Soon I will be out of the grasp of those who could have inticed me. It will be they that will have wished they had not been so negative with their thinking of me in the end... I'm really making huge leaps with my esteem. I'm really coming out of my shell and the results are starting to pay off. I can now once again approach a young lady and speak with her and have no fear of it. It won't be long now and then this site will be history for me and the lady's who had the best chance will have let me slip away...
Best of luck sexy_cowboy hope to see around. | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 2:24:13 PM | Now THAT my friend is a great attitude. The more you keep thinking positive... the more you 'll project that out unto others. Be daring... and don't care if you don't get the answer your looking for.... move on to the next gal that you find attractive and say hey, I'm WS6TA (your real name might work better :P ) , and i think we should chat. Be assumtive with your sale my friend. If you think you should chat because you think it you'd get along... tell them!
Best of luck bro
-Will | |
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alura2
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Joined: 3/18/2004
Msg: 85 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 2:33:38 PM | | yup you bet...any gal who thinks a shy guy is not a catch is an idiot...and are missing out on something wondefrul....once you crack that oyster shell...theres a pearl inside... | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 86 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 3:06:12 PM | E52INFLRRP:
Thank you for your take on this matter:
Sorry you don't see the humor in it? However I've had good feedback with it so maybe your just missing the comedy of it? Actually I'm very funny and everyone that knows me personally enjoys my humor very much. They also know my more sincere side as well so when I say "hello" or "how have you been today." They know I'm not just making small talk but expressing real concern... Many people are fake but I'm not one of them and it shows (maybe not in "text" without having meet me in person first but if you did then you would see things differently)
As for your comment "problem area?" Actually there is no real issue other than the fact that I was simply brave enough to put forth a true examination and not tell only half the story. How would one expect to find the answers they seek if they only permited themselves only postive assumptions and excluding the negative ones? Plus sometimes you yourself have to be the one to play devil's advocate just to insure that a fair test be administered...
See I don't really think or believe I'm down on myself at all. I'm not feeling sorry for myself either. I simply ask the question the answers are your own. It either confirms the theory or discounts it. If that happens a new theory arises in its place and so on until the real reality presents itself in its totality. Then we know what is right and what is wrong...
My conclussions so far: Is that a supermodel will not find me attractive (Not that I care, they are usually too shallow, just an observation). If it this wasn't so I'd heard from one by now? I've also learned that I have no reason to be so timid and should be more bolder. I've also learned that some women can be shy in the presence of someone they find interesting. Armed with this information I know now that I can use that to my advantage when ever I approach a young lady again. I've discovered a lot about others and myself too and all of this I see as a good thing.
This is an excellent website and nothing has helped me more than the great number of kind people willing to lend a hand. For this I'm extremely greatful
Thank you all | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 6:08:02 PM | | P.S. Lose the shirt!!! LOL | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 88 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 6:11:43 PM | I like the shirt. :)
silken | |
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WS6TA
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Joined: 4/26/2004
Msg: 89 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 6:36:41 PM | Geof & Silken
OMG which is it? You two are killing me LOL :)
I think we are going to have to start another thread dedicated entirely to this shirt? insert roll eyes here.  | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 6:39:37 PM | | Trust me on this buddy, the shirt has to go. Besides, silken likes shirtless men *snicker* | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 91 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 6:50:13 PM | Good point Geoff! Off with the shirt W6! ;)
silken | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 6:54:58 PM | | LOL You owe me one silken ;O) | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 93 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 7:01:50 PM | Off iwth your shirt too Geoff! :)
In fact off with all the men's shirts! ;)
hehe | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 7:06:34 PM | | If I can find my freakin digital camera I would ;O) | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 7:07:35 PM | Ummmm but silken, you of course will have to reciprocate in like manner  | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 96 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 7:14:40 PM | Well I don't really have shirtless pics. I do have boudoir pics I took for someone a few months back. I actually have this little goal... next boyfriend I have, I want to have my boudoir shot on his wall or his desk.... I think it would be fun and sexy and you can't see my face so no one would have to know who it was. :)
silken | |
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silken
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Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 98 | |
| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 7:49:12 PM | I did talk to a guy in the states for awhile and when I told him my idea for the next boyfriend, he nobly volunteered to test my theory out by putting one of the pics on his desk at work. ;)
We actually got a kick out of it because he said he got all these fellows making remarks and of course curious as hell about who this girl was but he wouldn't tell them. ;)
silken | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/6/2004 9:38:29 PM | w6 what you need is to go get a hot young hooker, that way you can get your d*mn confidence up and then go out and get rejected, many times infact, talk to every d*mn girl you see. Make a day out of it, try to ask 50 women of all ages and types, I gurrantee you someone, maybe a few will give you a chance. Dont pick them up in your beater, treat them like a gentlemen, open doors, compliment (dont overdue it) and dont talk so d*mn much about yourself, act interested in what they have to say, and build off the information they give you. Then if you have similiarities you can give appropriate feedback. Dont act needy which is what you sound like in your posts. We have already established that your not an ogre. That said, get rid of that ugly a** shirt that everyone has told you to do. You have been given some great ego boosters in here, so get your a** out on the field! Get involved in events that you like to do, like car shows or other things that you enjoy and start there. Tell yourself that you are fu*king beautiful over and over, tell yourself that you will get the girl, lift weights and start training! I cant say it enough GO GET PRACTICE AND GET REJECTED, THAT IS YOUR GOAL, TO GET REJECTED, YOU NEED PRACTICE IN TALKING TO WOMEN. I know you say youve been rejected alot but obviously you havent asked enough women, because a date in 10 years, come on man, that means you have not been being honest with yourself or your goals. JUST DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| Unattractive?
Posted: 10/7/2004 7:39:13 AM | | Very well said duffy!!!! | |
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