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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/27/2008 11:39:13 PM | I recently read another post like this. In it was stated (and by alot of the guys too, btw)that men who only want sex from you ,are only thinking of you as second rate to even begin with! That in 'their minds' they are thinking, well shes good enough for sex, for now 'WHILE' their still waiting on thier perfect ONE to come along!! Whats up with that kind of thinking??? Do 'most' women think THIS way?? I tend to believe women are more discerning as to who theyll decide to even bed with to BEGIN with! And Im sure there mustve been 'something' there for the OP then, as well too. I think it just sux when a guy will make you believe or decieve you into thinking that you ARE all that for them -when it was ONLY about sex to even BEGIN with for THEM! Sorry but IT IS guys like this that have NO scrupples!!!I believe it is all chemical too. Sometimes when a man gets into you...he really can get into you! Like a chemical addiction withdrawals can be a b**** too    | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/28/2008 6:22:48 AM |
Many women only want one night stands to. If the woman only wants a one night stand and you question her about commitment before sex, wouldn't that make the man seem too clingy or obsessive or some what foolish? In other words, it would ruin his opportunity?
I think not,, clingy no, obsessive no, foolish no, ... I think the whole concept is communication, and and understand the situation..
Therefore you would be doing this...below
How can a guy ever win? We are not mind readers.
Why is it that women make all the rules when it comes to sex?
Women don't make all the rules, if you think they do,, you give them to much power over you..
If a guy has sex with a woman, he has to abide by what the woman wants afterwards or else he is wrong. But this doesn't work the other way around!
I think if you set up rules/boundaries,, they should be respected. If either the man or the woman should break the rules/boundaries..then one or the other has to take responsibility for their actions and not pass blame..
Really, what a man should do is, be a man and not be controlled by the concept of sex,, when a man can do that,, I think,, he would gain the respect of a woman, and not be seen as anything but a man who is in control and in charge of who he is,, and won't submit to sex, or anything else in life to gain self satisfaction at the expense of a woman.. JMO..
{quote]That being said, many women seem to jump into different phases in their lives where they bounce between serial monogamy, serious relationships and extremely casual sex.
I see nothing wrong with that, men do that as well,, change in life style is good.. and it's their "choice" to do as they please as a woman...
Like one night they only slept next to guys on the first date. On another night they had sex on the first date. On another night they allowed no more than a cheek kiss. On another night they slept with a guy they didn’t care if they ever saw again.
That is called a woman who makes her own choices and is not controlled by a man,, and isn't that a good thing...and it's still their"choice" to do as they please as a woman...
Okay, wonders the ordinary guy with only middling psychic powers, which is it tonight?
That's easy, reading a woman is like reading a very good book,, keep on reading{communication} until you get it,, no mind powers needed... | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/28/2008 5:27:38 PM |
You obviously don’t know anything about women
I won't even bother commenting on that,,I'm not here to teach,,
If you re-read your post prior to my comments, it seem you are the one who has or had those issues with control/power, just by your statements,, or it could have been what you have observed, yet I have not experienced a woman trying to be in control, nor have I ever met any with power issues,, it just might be the different women you and I may attract,, at least, this man who knows nothing about woman , doesn't have your concerns or issues with woman.. good luck with that.. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/28/2008 5:33:08 PM | Haven't read all 35 pages, but here are my few cents. OP, what happened to you is classic. You are not the only one who got caught like that. The typical dynamics is the following:
1. A girl wants a relationship, not a one night stand.
2. She tells the boy that she is not up for the sex on the first date.
3. A boy listens and hopes she would change her mind. He tells her anything she wants to hear just to get sex.
4. A girl is hungry for love, and convinces herself that his words actually mean something.
5. She has sex with the boy hoping that this is a beginning of a relationship.
6. If the sex is good her brain generates oxytocin (spelling?? a hormone that is responsible for a feeling of bonding).
7. A boy is satisfied, doesn't feel any bonding and rushes out of her life.
8. She feels rejected, and he feels satisfied. After all, he didn't force her, she agreed.
The bottom line: All the sweet talk that you hear from a man when you just met him is just it - the talk. He is not into you yet, just into sex. Learn to wait and recognize signs of a man really interested in you, and that takes some time. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/28/2008 6:50:53 PM | Did anything happen that you did not want to happen? Doesn't sound like it. The only thing that upset you was his lack of response. You can't control other people. Stop trying.
You can control yourself, what you do, say and how you respond to things. End of story.
And to be perfectly honest, sleeping with someone the night you meet is risky business, so unless you are in the business of risk you can't complain about the losses you suffer.
Not meant as judgemental, I understand what you are saying but you are asking a question that can only truly be answered by that guy and he's not responding.. everything else is conjecture. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/29/2008 2:50:13 PM | RD is right on about this!
Really, what a man should do is, be a man and not be controlled by the concept of sex,, when a man can do that,, I think,, he would gain the respect of a woman, and not be seen as anything but a man who is in control and in charge of who he is,, and won't submit to sex, or anything else in life to gain self satisfaction at the expense of a woman.. JMO
Unfortunately though we live in a soceity wherein the "Concept of Sex" is and has always been controlled and ruled by the men.
Porn, sex, and prostitution will always be in high demand, as long as men consistly will seek it out, hence sex DOES sell..
Women (like men) will compete with themselves for the oposite sex. But alot of us can just plain lack this type of inventiveness of oneself. Neither would alot of women even want to portray or see themselves as being anything other than someones mom, sister or daughter, rightfully so, than to have to be perceived as anything of less a value than a mans ideal sexual mate. Therein lies 'the conflict' for most women..(duo identities!)
So it would seem to me that its up to the men to reverse or to even to solve these conflicts in women. Dont 'CREATE' them!
In other words, let a woman be a woman! By valuing her worth-not by just what she could do for you sexually above all else! Stop promoting the all sex sells engimas-then see what happens!
When we submit ourselves to you-by your own setup of standards of how a woman should be for YOU (that competing thing can also apply here)only to have you then throw it back in our faces by checking out on us-is about as humiliating for a woman as it is for a man to be laughed at!!
(Thats far from being a matter of some spilt milk too!) | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/29/2008 5:06:27 PM |
Unfortunately though we live in a soceity wherein the "Concept of Sex" is and has always been controlled and ruled by the men.
Porn, sex, and prostitution will always be in high demand, as long as men consistly will seek it out, hence sex DOES sell..
Your statement makes sense, but if you really look at it, it's not true, men may control the (sexual industry) however it's really woman who have the control.. all women need to do is say no, and the sexual industry will fail,, because without her what do you have,, men won't be able to seek that porn, if woman didn't perform..... | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/29/2008 7:25:06 PM | Some women do think about sex like men. Very prevalent. And when they do, they are
called promiscous, whores, loose, immoral, easy, sluts. etc. etc. etc. etc. Talk about double standards. We aren`t ALLOWED to think about sex like men------by men. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/29/2008 7:41:14 PM | I don`t think so. Just read the forums about what the guys say about women who hit them up for sex on the first date, or let them have it on the first date. We are obliged to always say no by the majority of the male population or there is a respect issue at hand.
So yes, we are expected to live by a different standard of morals, or we are judged. Not by all men but most.
Rule of thumb. It is fine for the guy to do whatever to get it because guys are guys and that is what they do.
Women are obligated to keep up their guard, to fight off his advances, and not believe a thing he says, or we are judged as stupid, needy, or just plain loose. We need to do this to win his respect.
That is how it is. I have actually left a first date telling a guy to keep his damned hands to himself and straighten up or I would kick him in the nuts, because he just wouldn`t take no for an answer. The date ended on a very sour note. He had the audacity to call back for a second date, seeing that I had "won" his respect. Oh Yeah, I failed to mention, he was a church official.
What a bunch of crap. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/29/2008 9:21:03 PM | Your statement makes sense, but if you really look at it, it's not true, men may control the (sexual industry) however it's really woman who have the control.. all women need to do is say no, and the sexual industry will fail,, because without her what do you have,,
NO MEN!! 
men won't be able to seek that porn, if woman didn't perform.....
Its precisely WHY alot seek it too!
Lets not fail to mention here that those 'performances' can provide a good source of income for some as well! Respect for oneself oftentimes takes a backseat when it comes to making ones living today. Which is kinda sad, really but true too..
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/30/2008 11:03:25 AM |
You are forgetting rdnorm, when it comes to sex, its always the man's fault if some thing is misunderstood or goes wrong. If sex is the man's idea, it means its evil.
You seem to have a point there, as I read laura2u comments..
Even thought it may be true that men might control the sex industry, without women, that industry would fail.. therefore I say, women should take control of who they are and want to be, instead blaming a man for what the do..like this statement...
Lets not fail to mention here that those 'performances' can provide a good source of income for some as well! Respect for oneself oftentimes takes a backseat when it comes to making ones living today. Which is kinda sad, really but true too..
I agree it is sad,, but is that a mans responsibility to change who or what some women might think who we are,, or is it better to say,, if a woman doesn't like what men do,, stop giving it to us,, and if your getting paid for it because of your life,, it's still your choice to choose something different,, lets not blame men for the choices woman make..
men won't be able to seek that porn, if woman didn't perform.....
Its precisely WHY alot seek it too!
I agree,, but it's still a woman's choice do as they please,, even if some men like sex,, if women didn't provide it in the sexual industry,, men wouldn't be able to have it.. lets not pass the blame on me.. as long as some women supply it, some men will take it...
view it this way,, if cigarettes were not available , therefore lung cancer would decline, among so many other related issues,, but we choose to blame the industry, those companies sell it and men and woman buy it, (lets leave children out of this)
Isn't that the same as the sex industry,, if it wasn't available some men may not crave it, and if they were to,, their addiction will fade because the unavailability of feeding their addition..
Bottom line,, it takes two the play the game,, man and woman.. one can not pass the blame on the other without first taking responsibility for what they do or have done first.. passing blame on either sex, will never solve anything,, | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/30/2008 4:20:51 PM | No Demand=No Supply
All Im saying Rd is that maybe 'WE' ought to be deMANding all the deMANd!
And Im NOT "blaming" anyone species here either! Like I had originally stated "In Our Soceity these days".
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/30/2008 4:20:51 PM | No Demand=No Supply
All Im saying Rd is that maybe 'WE' ought to be deMANding all the deMANd!
And Im NOT "blaming" anyone species here either! Like I had originally stated "In Our Soceity these days".
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/30/2008 4:27:40 PM | He certainly has no class, but you have to remember that guys can have sex like they can play a sport: have a great time, and walk away.
It's just how they're wired. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/30/2008 4:51:12 PM | True Cf, but during that 'game' they still wanna get themselves some points & be able to score too, right? Why would they just wanna "walk away" without ever even know the score or if theyve even won for that matter? Was the whole game even ever worth playing then?
Sounds like a short-circuit there to me... | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/30/2008 6:36:28 PM | He certainly has no class, but you have to remember that guys can have sex like they can play a sport: have a great time, and walk away.
It's just how they're wired.
So I guess it's absolutely fine if a guy does that to your Mother, Sister, or Daughter because guys will be guys, right? They're not really human beings here just something to score. A simple acknowledgement afterwards would be a waste of time and beneath a guy. So I guess "Hell hath no fury" is perfectly acceptable as far as what ever a woman wants do - spreading the word that he's lousy in bed or is lacking endowment - hey, it's just how we're wired. A guy that's stupid burns bridges with all of the women he meets. A guy who's smart is nice to the women he's slept with so he's not dating "Miss Michigan" in lean times. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 11/30/2008 11:07:40 PM | A little naive but, u learned the hard way. Hee Hee literally. If ur not lookin for a "one night stand" than next time dont give it up if u want to continue anything. Trust me dude guys will say ANYTHING do ANYTHING to get u in bed. Dont fall for it. They have this little or sometimes big flaw its called a penis. It makes them all crazylike. Dont get to upset about it, it happens to the best of us. If he tries and u dont give it up and dosent call than he was only lookin for one thing so dont wonder why.
Was he even any good? My guess is most likely not. So dont sweat it. If anyone should feel bad about it its him. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 12/1/2008 12:07:24 AM | Well ladies and gents i dissagree with all the men in the build saying its her fault. Why i say this is that there are a lot of players who play the are a nice guy so man out there that its hit and run all over the place. there whoud be a penis law that states if you let it jump for fun you get sterlized. they need to do this. this would teach men to stop playing women. i so hope to god our goverment does this. Sorry but its true men go in to have sex wiuth intent to hurt the girl with out care. some women do it too but its mostly men or kids i say. Bipolar means a person who doesnt want to grow up, but sure does have a lot of sex.
thats my rant | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 12/1/2008 5:00:58 AM | | LOL. If men were to be sterilized for jumping in and then running then there would be less condom use and more stds.. Not everyone wants to make babies.. Some want to practice not produce offspring Okay, back to the subject. People use each other for sex. Some just want a quick wam-bam, and some want more. So I think both parties use each other in one way or the other. | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 12/1/2008 6:39:16 AM | well lets put it this way in china you let out the wong dong and make more than one baby you get it cut off. Imagen that happening here to players who do nothing but screw women cuze they are sick in the head. yeah im talking to you player all that play women and men a like. This is why a decent guy has so much problems find a girl cause guys who play women do it so much that its tabu to us guys to find a girl. they think all men are out to booty call cuz of this.
Players and there text scripts they send women in here. brittany spears has it right womanizer womanizer. So when that guy said that comment about whati said about steriling its a typical player trait to slap back at those who are against them.
Ladies its real easy just dont give into there sexual indo indos. dont let them get it, period. if they cant swim in your pants with in a month or so they move on. Some times its just better to get to know some one take your time the old fashion way and just dont give in. but as for what happen here its just a matterof another player getting his rocks off as another win over women. Remember to these biopolar jackasses who only want sex its a game to them, not matter if it hurts your feelings or not.
thats my rant on players | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 12/1/2008 6:56:02 AM | well lets put it this way in china you let out the wong dong and make more than one baby you get it cut off. .
Actually the woman is forced to have an abortion and her tubes are tied, nothing happens to the man, but thanks by the cultural misconception.
. This is why a decent guy has so much problems find a girl cause guys who play women do it so much that its tabu to us guys to find a girl.
If you are a decent guy, why would you want a feeble-minded woman who keeps falling for players?
Ladies its real easy just dont give into there sexual indo indos.
Yes, it's real easy, ladies. You would think that women would have gotten it long ago, but I might be wrong at that. Or at least, be sure that his indo indos (and yours) are clean. First impressions are paramount, you know . | |
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| why do men think they can use women for sex?
Posted: 12/1/2008 7:29:58 AM | Another bold palyer just put his two cents out ladies this how they are. they know its a numbers game so they dont care. but your wrongin china the woman does get fixed but if the guy goes around other woman and does this its a crime in chine to do this and wong dong does get cut loose. so why dont you go there and find out player. i doubl dog dare you. LOL
when a guy comments my rant on players besure to beleive its a player | |
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