| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:47:39 PM | | If I ever find someone who wants a serious relationship with me you better believe I would be off here. I'm always ready to get off these sites and I would let everyone know I'm with someone now. I hate it even if I'm dating someone for a while that they don't give the relationship a chance to grow and stop talking to other women at least for a while. To me thats just considerate and respectful. I sure don't need a handful of men when I'm trying to date one. I don't understand the logic in continuing to talk to other people when dating someone. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/14/2008 12:41:50 PM | | I am too naive and you sound the same way. God know do not remove your ad under any circumstances. I have been in relationships and had people just disappear on me and not even answer my messages when I called and I do not even know why. These sites are mass dating, this sounds good but I wonder what tomorrow might bring; he is ok but, I wish he had a nicer car or more money etc but I will stick with him for now as it is better than being alone. Do not mean to sound bitter. At my age I have been around the block many times. You know the saying if it sounds too good to be true, it usually is and the only way someone you were dating would even know if you continued the ad is if they stayed on the site and continued theirs; | |
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PeterC
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Joined: 3/6/2008
Msg: 383 | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/14/2008 3:52:59 PM | Yes - yes and yes.
I thought the purpose was to find one someone and try to give that new realtionship the best chance to work. Not that I can't walk and chew gum at the same time, but I like to concentrate on one thing at a time, I think it would be confusing trying to juggle multi-relationships.
I for one did not join POF to keep looking and looking. If I were interested in someone, I would not spend my energy keeping looking in the hope that there is someone else I might like better. I would love to stop fishing. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/14/2008 3:54:23 PM | | Absolutely; Do you think it would be healthy that 5-10 times a day as you walk around your job or doing your daily things you flirted with someone? Its disrespectful. Forums are fine, but flirting with the opposite sex is totally wrong. I dont know how many married women try to talk to me and have cyber sex but say its ok cuz their husband knows. Many times they dont. I'm not stupid. Everyone that thinks your just going to do the forums though, please stand on your head. No one is standing on their head. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/16/2008 1:04:39 AM | Most definately i would leave the dating site. There would be no reason to be on here what so ever. Firstly it would stop any temptation of the greener grass syndrome secondly it you stop any doubts with your partner not being able to trust. And thirdly people change profile to friends and stay on, why? Surely between spending time together with each others friends and family and time alone you wouldnt need more online friends.
Take care peeps i just wish above happened to me. | |
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Nariel
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Joined: 11/30/2007
Msg: 387 | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/21/2008 2:13:41 AM | I just have to ask. If you found your "someone", would you continue to send emails, IM, etc. with others of the opposite sex? Would you stop fishing? Come on, let's hear the honest truth on this one. I'm more than a little curious about what people have to say on this.
Yeah, I'd stop. Well, technically I have already stopped. I haven't sent or responded to an e-mail or IM in months even though I'm single. However, I might be tempted to log in and mess around on the forums when I'm bored and having trouble sleeping. (Sort of like right now.)  | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/21/2008 2:37:22 AM | | I would definitely leave the site if i found the one but not straight away i would have to be seeing some one for at least a month or 2 just to make sure that were an item.in other words i would'nt leave the site straight away incase the relationship did'nt work out. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/21/2008 8:04:02 PM | ExMiner wrote:
****** i would'nt leave the site straight away incase the relationship did'nt work out. ******
YIKES! Isn't that sort of defeating the relationship before it even has a chance? I'd much rather someone believe me worthy of getting off the personals ... it's one of those things that would definitely tell me this guy is serious about seeing if there will be an "us."
I can't understand why it would be such a hard thing to do to get off the personals and give the relationship a chance without the insecurity a dating profile might give someone you care about? You can always create it again if things didn't work out.
Sharzi | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/21/2008 8:14:19 PM | | I think it depends on who your in a relationship with. My boyfriend and I BOTH still have are POF profiles active. We just state ONLY FRIENDS, change to Not single/Not looking, put in About me how we found someone already.. then leave profile alone... we don't message anyone who also is looking for friends but still... with trust and both aware of it, don't see the big deal... but ya it all depends on each person, on what should happen. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/21/2008 10:15:47 PM | If I was dating someone and it was like the 3rd ior 4h date, I would expect her profile to reflect her "not avaiable anymore" status, or to be removed.
It does not take a mentally stable person more than one or two dates to determine if this is someone you would like to date [ monogamosly ] and see if THAT leads to a LTR. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/22/2008 8:31:01 PM | sweet n heart wrote:
****** I think it depends on who your in a relationship with. My boyfriend and I BOTH still have are POF profiles active. We just state ONLY FRIENDS, change to Not single/Not looking, put in About me how we found someone already.. then leave profile alone... we don't message anyone who also is looking for friends but still... with trust and both aware of it, don't see the big deal... but ya it all depends on each person, on what should happen. ******
That's the thing though... there is so much temptation. We all know that even if you put that in your profile that you found someone or you are only looking for friends, you're still going to get interested parties who write to you. And temptation can sometimes get the better of someone who might be otherwise a very good person. But one day along comes someone and there is that spark... how do you know your bf could resist? What if you couldn't?
I'd much rather eliminate that scenerio. It's hard enough in a world where people don't care if you're married or in a relationship... they still hit on you anyway. Why add a dating site into the mix?
For me, I'd feel so much more secure knowing my guy quit the personals and stuck to other types of forums that aren't related to dating. I would do the same for him.
Sharzi | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/22/2008 8:51:14 PM | | For sure I would leave the dating site. A relationship is about honesty and trust. I would actually feel like I was cheating if I still went to a site while I'm in a serious relationship. If I'm in a serious relationship why would I need a dating site anyway. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 4/22/2008 9:09:51 PM | Of course I wouldn't leave. I would just stay on here, IM people nightly, flirt with any person I found the least bit interesting, ask some of them out, periodically enhance and update my profile, be vague about my whereabouts, wonder why my relationships don't work out, blame the other person person for the failure of my relationship, then go back to my first love -- the internet. Oh, wait, that's not who I am...those are some of the men I've been meeting. 
In all seriousness, I do love the forums, so if my SO was okay with it, I would stay on for the forums, but state I was not single/not looking in my profile. However, if it bothered him that I was on here, then I would take my profile down. Period. I care more about a real person than I do about cyber people - not that there's anything wrong with cyber friends - it's just that you can't look into their eyes, feel their touch, and hear their voice. In my opinion, the screen cannot compete with the warmth of a person who is next to you.  | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 5/7/2008 2:07:07 PM | | Yes I would leave if I got in a serious relationship. I would only be in a serious relationship with a man who valued my opinions and intelligence, and beauty, so I would not feel the need to have others validate these things for me online. But, that's just me. | |
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| Would you leave the dating sites if you got in a serious relationship?
Posted: 5/7/2008 4:06:54 PM | Sharzi wrote: We all know that even if you put that in
your profile that you found someone or you are only
looking for friends, you're still going to get interested
parties who write to you.
That's true, and for some of us that's a good thing.
Your SO must temper his or her demands when they know
you have interested takers at the ready and will follow up
on upgrade opportunities. | |
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