| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 4:14:52 PM |
would you date a woman with hair pits or legs?
I would argue that the amount of time, effort, and cost to keep those areas free of hair is nowhere close to what it takes to keep hair off your back. Women can jump in the shower and within 10 minutes be clean and clear... Not nearly as easy for a guy to do it.
I'm not asking you to change your preference... but don't be so judgemental if a guy chooses not to shave/wax his back for you. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 4:26:50 PM | "You obviously met a very crude and callous woman who made you feel badly because of something you cannot control. Body hair is perfectly natural and eventually you will find someone whom it doesn't bother. Be glad she showed you her immaturity and lack of class early on. "
Wow... so now a woman's preference for clean shaven man backs makes her crude and callous?? Are we all just a bunch of volatile ****es??? Come on... I don't think a distaste for a hairy back is crude or callous. Perhaps her reaction could have been a little more tactful, but I'll be honest, I probably would have reacted the same way. Not because I think the PERSON is gross, I just don't like hairy backs. I feel bad for OP because you're right, when is a good time to go 'hey, my name is... and just so you know I am growing a Persian rug on my back.' It's not something that normally comes up in conversation.
I LOVE hairy chests... and that little trail going from the belly button to you-know-where... but I have to admit a hairy back is a little much if its completely covered.
OP, next time you might want to try maybe casually putting your hand up the back of your shirt to scratch your back and make sure your shirt lifts up so that she can have a quick peek... or think of other ways to casually show your back. That way the woman will know you have a hairy back without touching it first. Good luck! :) | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 6:24:46 PM | EEEEWWWW!!
That crap TOTALLY turns me off! If I gotta shave buddy,you gotta pony up the razor too or find a good waxologist | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 7:49:20 PM | I love body hair on men! It is so quintessentially masculine it gives me butterflies in my tummy just thinking about it....
I do have to admit that I don't find back hair visually appealing, but the feel of it just does wonderful things for me! And I when I get intimate with a man it's to touch him, not look at him.
I'd suggest you don't let this bother you just because one woman doesn't know what she's missing out on. You don't need to 'broach' it as if it's a handicap - most women will have a pretty good idea about it before you get shirtless anyway. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 7:55:08 PM | | Fight shallow with shallow- tell her you'll shave her back when she shaves her a55 crack:/ | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 8:03:19 PM |
I would argue that the amount of time, effort, and cost to keep those areas free of hair is nowhere close to what it takes to keep hair off your back. Women can jump in the shower and within 10 minutes be clean and clear... Not nearly as easy for a guy to do it.
...and I would argue your point completely.
I'm half Italian and I definitely got the hair gene. I have my back waxed about every 6 weeks. I could probably wait longer than that, but I don't. For the most part, a full back wax will cost you anywhere from $50-$100, depending on how hairy you are.
Compare that to women shaving all their body parts, a number of which have to be done every few days; (Add in the cost of razors, cream, whatever else?) and it's way more than I have to deal with.
If we're so adamant that we want women to shave, don't you think it's only fair we do the same in return? Kinda sketchy and hypocritical otherwise. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 8:14:15 PM |
Compare that to women shaving all their body parts, a number of which have to be done every few days; (Add in the cost of razors, cream, whatever else?) and it's way more than I have to deal with.
I'm going to have to call bullsh!t on that one my friend. I'm not sure where you are buying YOUR razors and shaving cream... but it doesn't cost NEARLY $50 every 6 weeks. Plus men spend about the same amount shaving their face EVERY DAY...
And if I don't want to shave, I can't put a pair of jeans on to cover it up. | |
|
Guess
|
Joined: 10/2/2007
Msg: 58 | |
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 8:18:47 PM | | Op hair on the chest can be ok,in the face hmm less ok,on the back no way,never ok.Don't complain now I have the right to think my own way. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 8:22:52 PM |
To me, I don't particularly care if a woman has hair in her armpits, or hair on her legs. This is the way she is as a human being. If either of those things are "deal breakers" for me, then I'm obviously not emotionally mature enough to be in a relationship in the first place. It's like a woman who uses height as a make-or-break thing for a man's "acceptability". If she's that hung up on a man's height, she isn't emotionally (and some would say intellectually) mature enough to be looking for a long-term relationship in the first place. If all you're looking for is a shag, then hey, be as physically shallow as you like. There's no emotional component involved. You're looking for Tab A to fit into Slot B for some physical gratification, nothing more.
That's a rather judgmental thing to say, don't you think? I hate it when people put conditions on things. If you REALLY wanted this, you'd do this... if this were all that important to you, you'd put up with this... it doesn't work that way. People have preferences. We'd all love to think we're lofty and completely non-judgmental, but for most people (myself included), there are some things we just can't take. I used to date a guy with hair all over the place -- chest, back, a$$... the chest was nice, but it seemed a little odd on the back and... well, you know where. Sure, I loved him, but that didn't stop me from cringing whenever he took his shirt off. It was just a kneejerk reaction. However, since he wasn't really a huge fan of it either, he wanted to shave it, and I helped him with the stuff on his back (I'm not shaving ANYBODY's butt, I gotta draw a line somewhere). I thought that was fair.
To the guy who says it takes a girl ten minutes to shower and a guy much longer... I'm guessing you haven't had a girl in your shower recently. Typically, a girl gets in the shower, shampoos, conditions, washes, and shaves her legs (and possibly elsewhere). That can take a good deal more than ten minutes, whereas for most guys, it's nowhere near that long. The double standard really isn't fair. I'd challenge almost any guy who says "I love my girl the way she is" to see how he feels after she stops shaving her legs, armpits, or anywhere else, stops wearing makeup and nail polish, and starts having that extra helping of dessert after dinner. Women bend over backward to look good for a guy, so I don't think it's too much to ask that we make a request or two in return.
In any case, OP, do what you feel is right. Personally, I'd recommend not bringing it up flat out. If somehow you end up on the subject of hair, find a way to casually mention it. You might even consider making a little joke out of it. It can do wonders to break the tension. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 8:27:23 PM |
I'm not sure where you are buying YOUR razors and shaving cream... but it doesn't cost NEARLY $50 every 6 weeks. Plus men spend about the same amount shaving their face EVERY DAY...
The amount of money an ex g/f of mine used to spend on all her "crap", was way more than $50 every six weeks. What I choose to spend shaving, is more than that, but that's my choice.
And if I don't want to shave, I can't put a pair of jeans on to cover it up.
If a woman chooses not to shave her legs, armpits, etc...and just covers it up and then one night you become intimate with her, are you gonna be okay with it? Most men aren't. Technically, women have a choice to shave or not. In reality, they don't. Most guys don't like it and are turned off. What if her legs and armpits are as hairy as this guys back? Come on.
Basically, women are expected to shave the body parts or deal with the majority of most guys declining any offer they make. Whereas the guys with the hairy backs are given a free pass, because "women can just deal with it"? It's not "manly" to wax it? It's too much of a hassle? As if women don't have to deal with all that crap, in respect to us and yet they do it anyway!
I say again, if women can take the time necessary and spend the money it costs to keep up their grooming habits, the very least we can do is the same in kind. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/13/2008 9:59:38 PM | marahnna said:
People have preferences.
You're right, people have preferences. I have physical preferences in ladies too. There's a world of difference, however, between "preference" and "requirement", and for the ladies in this thread who are making as big a deal out of a hairy back as some seem to be, it seems obvious it isn't a mere preference they're referencing, but a requirement. And if they're going to make something like that a requirement, then I'll stick by my original statement: they aren't emotionally (or intellectually) mature enough to be in a relationship like that in the first place. "Why?" some might ask. I'll tell you: because a long-lasting relationship is about finding someone who fits you so well as a person that you can overlook a couple of their imperfections, even if those are things that are really big on your list. So long as those "big things" on the list that aren't requirements don't become requirements, then you're A-OK. But when they move into the "requirements" column, it becomes a lot tougher to justify. This is why the people with the fewest requirements, or perhaps just with an attitude of some mutability to their preferences, are the ones who wind up in relationships (lasting ones) the fastest.
I don't advocate complete divestiture of the things one finds attractive. But the bottom line is there are some things that some people, women and men both, use as "automatic disqualifiers" that are simply indefensible. Height is one of those things. The amount of hair on a man's back is another. Those aren't the only two on the list. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 1:07:52 AM | | Too often the inner imperfections are overlooked, because of the outer perfections we expect. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 1:21:37 AM | | As once said by the Jerky Boys, "Can I get Laser Treatment?". Or you can just be as you are. When a woman says your back is like my grandmother's dining room rug, tell her not to let the door hit her in the J-Lo. ;) | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 3:30:30 AM | Men expect us to make the effort to not only look good but feel good, now dont you lot come back at me denying it because we women know what you expect from us as you are bloody quick enough to whinge on and tell us.
Is it too much to expect that you comply with our wishes/preferences?
Or are your delicate wee egos getting a bruising here at the thought we may find your physical attributes less than perfect ? | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 4:15:18 AM |
Or are your delicate wee egos getting a bruising here at the thought we may find your physical attributes less than perfect ?
Has nothing to do with my ego at all.
So you would have men fall into the same false sense of acceptance based on physical attraction that has been piled on women all these years? I am either accepted for who I am, or not at all. I am not going to alter my physical appearance other then keeping myself well groomed, such as a hair cut, showered etc.
Who was it that dictated that a woman should shave her armpits and legs? Who was it that dictated that a woman should wear makeup? I’m not 100% sure, but I don’t think it was a man. Time for some heavy Googling me thinks. I’ll get back to you on this. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 4:54:46 AM |
The amount of money an ex g/f of mine used to spend on all her "crap", was way more than $50 every six weeks. What I choose to spend shaving, is more than that, but that's my choice.
Exactly, its all about choice. You choose to spend your money and time on frivolous and temporary things to make you look good. I choose to spend my money on more worthwhile things like electronics and video games. 
Lord help any man that is EXPECTED to be manscaped. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 5:30:10 AM | | I don't think the first meeting is the time to talk about a "hairy back".........i used to be totally turned off by it until i met someone that i really liked and then it didn't matter wheter he had hair or not...............go figure:-) | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 11:18:55 AM | My Dad is about 65 and recently went to Jamaica. My mother had this great idea for him to get his back waxed before they left. Now my dad isnt super hairy but with age he is getting more and its mostly around the sides, a hard place to shave!!
He broke out in the most severe rash I ever saw!! Horrible red bumps and puss all over his back. He was itchy his entire vacation.
OP you should have told the girl you do not like women with hair on their HEAD!!
New catagory needed under religion, body type etc. BODY HAIR!! GEEZ. Some of you women are just rude and nasty no wonder you are single!! | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 11:39:15 AM | | The problem here isn't that one should or shouldn't like hairy backs it is telling someone you are grossed out by that and demand that they change for you. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 3:19:23 PM |
Exactly, its all about choice. You choose to spend your money and time on frivolous and temporary things to make you look good.
Of course it looks better, but as I've said three times now it's more than that.
If I'm going to expect that the woman I'm with keep up her grooming habits (Shaving, being just one) and in turn, not give a damn or expect her to just "deal with me as I am" when she asks the same of me? I'd say point blank, that pretty much would make me a hypocritical jerk, at the very least.
Lord help any man that is EXPECTED to be manscaped.
Do you not see, that women are EXPECTED to be "woman-scaped"? They always have been and as it seems, they always will be.
So again, it's perfectly ok for us to expect this of them but when they expect it of us, they're out of line? Gimme a break. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 9:24:24 PM |
Women bend over backward to look good for a guy
Let's not kid ourselves -- women bend over backward to look good for *each other*. Frankly, I greatly prefer the women who don't bother with the makeup or dressing to the nines. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 9:40:50 PM | I don't like hairy backs. It grosses me out, too. I once was intimate with a guy who had a very hairy back, and I couldn't even continue. Of course, I tried to be nice about it, and I didn't just tell him that it grossed me out.
Women do have to be women-scaped. We have to shave pretty much everything, or guys would think we were gross. And I've never worn make-up for another woman. To the guy who says he would rather see up without make-up, you might want to reconsider that. I'm not an advocate for heavy make-up or dressing to the nines either, but I am one for trying to look nice.
OP, if you don't want to shave or wax the hair, then don't do it. You aren't required to do anything for anyone. Some women might like it. Most women probably don't. I understand you don't want to spend money on "frivolous" items. I don't either, but then I probably wouldn't get many dates either. | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 9:53:39 PM |
To the guy who says he would rather see up without make-up, you might want to reconsider that.
Ah, no, I know what my preferences are quite well. Why do you assume otherwise? | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/14/2008 11:30:12 PM | "I like hairy men but I'm not about to bop a six foot weasel."
--Catherine Willows from CSI: Crime Scene Investigation | |
|
| HAIRY BACKS
Posted: 3/15/2008 1:10:02 AM |
I was told that it would take months for it to grow back... maybe it depends on the guy??
Yup...people's hair-growth rates are different...ie. some guys need to shave daily, others every other day so backs are no different...and hair grows faster in the warmer months than the cooler.
Is it true that shaving will make it grow back thicker?
For some people it stimulates further hair growth in the shaved area so it will become thicker.
For others it will split the hair shaft so therefore makes it look thicker when it grows.
And then what shaving also does is blunt the ends of the hair shaft...so again it gives the visual impression of being thicker. (and feels prickly!)
Depilatory creams give basically the same result as shaving.
Waxing is the way to go cos it riiiiips those suckers out by (hopefully) the hair root and deters regrowth.
The longer you wax (without shaving) the more chance you have of the hair eventually never regrowing at all (or atleast in far more sparse amounts)
Electrolysis is a loooong process and dependent upon the hair still being attached to the root to stunt growth (so can be very very costly)
Incidentally...to stunt growth....its best to wax when the hair is still attached to the root ie. dont let the hair grow to full length before you do it cos its likely detatched and another hair is growing already within the follicle.
Any other hair removal treatments Im not familiar with. | |
|
Home
login 
