| How to deal with feeling replaced
Posted: 4/23/2008 10:14:30 AM | hi,
its hard man it takes a lot of time then sometimes t feels ike it takes no time at all your kids are just doing what kids do talking about themselves becose that is their world it hurts to hear them talk about what seems like hapy times that you are not involved in but the act of tlling you and i suspect with some excitemn in their voces is about missing youwishing in part it was you nt him, waning to keep ou feeling included and letting you know that they love you despite this new 'toy' or experience in their life. I went through it all the stages of grief and loss and back again but i held my metal made sure i never hurt my kid over my own elingsor as best i could with the situation your dealt but now my girls older 11 and oh boy how that worry and anxiety you are having now is put to rest. how close we are how she feels she can tell me anything partly becouse she was able to tell me about this other world she had as a younger kid but also she is able to come to me whe things arn god and that is so important.
email me anyime | |
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| How to deal with feeling replaced
Posted: 4/23/2008 10:19:17 AM | | If he seems like a good guy, then just be happy your kids have someone there who likes them and treats them well over the alternative. You'll always be their dad. Kids don't have a finite amount of love, so you really can't be replaced unless you take off and stop being a part of their lives. They could grow to love this guy and he could grow to love them and it wouldn't mean that they loved you any less. | |
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| How to deal with feeling replaced
Posted: 4/23/2008 1:48:06 PM |
Now my own poersonal solution to this problem would be to make the marriage work in the first place
Despite the fact that she cheated on me, I tried to make the marriage work. There's only so much you can do if the other person wants out. To be honest, I don't appreciate the implication that I simply chose to walk away from my kids without doing everything I could to make it work.
I could be wrong on this but I though you said earlier in this thread that you had your doubts about if your ex met her new man before or after your divorce.
I'm not sure what post you're referring to, but the posts I recall involved somebody else saying that he was probably around earlier. I responded stating that I knew how they met, and it wasn't until after we had separated. There were some guys before we separated, but he wasn't one of them. | |
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| How to deal with feeling replaced
Posted: 7/7/2008 3:49:37 AM | Life sometimes takes very strange twists...
My ex recently began suffering from some serious health issues. Her boyfriend (she officially acknowledges him as such now) has been taking her repeatedly to the emergency room, and just last night, she was admitted to the hospital. While they've been running back and forth, the kids have been staying with me.
In the past 4 nights, 3 times I've brought dinner to this guy so that he didn't have to leave the hospital. While he ate (and watched the kids), I visited with my ex, kept her company, and helped her out a bit.
I still get some jealous feelings about him and the kids, but he, my ex, and I are all working together these days to take care of the kids. It's been a bit awkward, but that's life. | |
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| How to deal with feeling replaced
Posted: 7/7/2008 8:34:39 PM | | Sorry to hear about that Steve, I hope everything works out well for you all and your kiddos have their Mom back 100% soon. You're a good dude, you know it? | |
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| How to deal with feeling replaced
Posted: 7/7/2008 11:38:48 PM | | It does, doesn't it.... How you are handling this situation is a prime example of putting your kids first. Keep up the good work and good thoughts that everything is back to normal for you all (especially the kiddos) soon. | |
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| How to deal with feeling replaced
Posted: 7/7/2008 11:57:42 PM | | wow u men r very respectfullll........Im a single mom and just left an abusive ex....still let my daughter see her dad and he doesnt even support her........Im scared to meet guys on here because I protect them....but at the same time, even though her dad was very mean to me i wold never let a guy replace him, unless that man was showing more affection as well as being a riend to her.......kids grow older and can read their parents thought they kow in their hearts if u r a good dad r not....thats if ur exsssss get along with u and dont turn them against u......my young one is smart for 2 and its hard for me to tell her daddys no good......he loves her but just not enough to go beyond love....to me a good dad supports their kids helps mom out and works as a team no matter if ur together r not......my oldest hates his dad but I still encourage him....If u want money start chatting to ur dad....he wont so so be it.....my daughter on the other hand spends time with her dad.....what can u do just love them and call all the time.......that means every day.......... | |
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