| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/27/2009 8:07:13 AM |
I know of several men who are raisig their children and taking good care of them. They are also recieving child support.
I'm the CP. I pay her. She doesn't pay a dime. lol | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/27/2009 8:46:55 AM |
Similar story here in the UK. However, I've had a dig around the net and not come across a single female having been incarcerated for not paying her CS. How is it in Missouri?
I've never heard of it here in the states. My ex owes me and can't get her drivers license until she pays me a substantial amount. In a lot of cases women who lose custody of children go on to have more, thus gaining sympathy from the courts. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/27/2009 2:53:23 PM |
In a lot of cases women who lose custody of children go on to have more, thus gaining sympathy from the courts.
Perhaps hysterectomies should be considered for all women found to be shirking their responsibilities with regard to paying child support. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/27/2009 3:50:32 PM | The purpose of child support is to provide a custodial parent with the means to continue their life without significant change in circumstance. If they would like to use it for gas to go places with their kids great - if they'd like to put it towards vacations with the notion of finding prospective 2nd guys that also works.
Its also a method for the government to make it clear that breaking up is not a method to manipulate someone - and that the lifestyles of the two parents do not significantly diverge simply as a result of the breakup. The governement doesn't want breakups to be a source of new liabilities that have to be paid for with taxes. They also consider marriage for the person making less money as a shared/pension arrangement - that reduces their long term liabilities with respect to families. Otherwise they'd have to fill in income for one side of a divorcing coupe all the time.
The real point is that Parent A who makes more money shouldn't be able to breakup from parent B in order to make that parent poor. It has no relationship to where the money is spent at all. If you'd like you money spent on your kids retain custody. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/27/2009 4:30:27 PM | [While recognising that in marriage-like relationships women will most often consult their SO about having kids, women ARE the only ones who can decide to bring children into the world. Men have exactly ZERO say in her decision.]
Men certainly DO have a hand in the decision. Knowing full well the laws re:abortion, the difference is that men have no choice but to decide while they are still dressed. I'm not saying this is fair, but it is the way it is.
[You pay CS? Good for you. I do too. The vast majority of men who are ordered to pay, do so as well.]
Anyone who provides for their children is supporting them, whether they pay that money to someone else or not. I was addressing your comment stating that women "claim" that they would pay happily. Many CS (men & women alike) are thankful for this opportunity, although the majority of the cost is often borne by the custodial parent.
[So you are saying that statistics are not worth looking at?]
I'm not saying that they are totally meaningless, I'm only saying that statistics can be used as evidence for either side of an argument. Again, often a parent who works only part time is responsible for a younger than school age child; doesn't change the stats, but it may change the argument. For example, one could say that since 84% of CPs are women, men must not be as interested in their kids. Statistics are merely cumulative data, not statements of fact, that's all.
[My ex and her life choices are more typical, aside from the house renos, than uncommon.
And that is MY point that many women seem to miss. There are many women out there who choose not to bring as much to the table, financially, as they could because they are collecting CS that affords them the luxury of working less than they could.]
Who says this is typical? YOUR experience tells you so; mine tells me a completely different story, but I know better (not better than you, it's just that I realize that my experience is not the only experience). There is not one single mother or father I have encountered who lives this way, not one, and I know many. It is unfair to assume to know anyone's motivation. How could you possibly know the reason one "chooses" to forfeit income?
In any case, again, my point is that there seems to be an awful lot of complaining (not from you personally, per se) about the CS system, and I don't disagree that there are problems with those who take advantage. However, I believe that narrowing it down, and finding a point that can be dealt with in some simpler fashion, would be a beginning to effect change. Accounting for CS monies spent would seem at least a first step towards fairness.
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/27/2009 6:08:10 PM |
The real point is that Parent A who makes more money shouldn't be able to breakup from parent B in order to make that parent poor.
I think you're confusing alimony with child support. They're two different things. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/28/2009 12:19:17 AM |
I think you're confusing alimony with child support. They're two different things.
LOL
Tell that to the UK local authorities.
The low paid or unemployed can claim some benefits from local authority in the form of help for rent and council tax. Child support is taken into account and treated as "income" thereby reducing benefits accordingly. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/28/2009 8:52:39 AM |
Child support is taken into account and treated as "income" thereby reducing benefits accordingly.
Really? Here in Canada it doesn't work that way. All child support monies are tax free to the recipient. Spousal support, however, is taxable income for the recipient and is a tax deduction for the payer. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/28/2009 10:13:31 AM |
Really? Here in Canada it doesn't work that way. All child support monies are tax free to the recipient. Spousal support, however, is taxable income for the recipient and is a tax deduction for the payer.
The local authority, if they are giving help towards rent, work out what the shortfall is and pay the difference as a benefit. It sort of renders as irrelevant what the absent parent pays towards the upbringing of the child. The idea is to make sure that the parent with care doesn't have to face an uncertain future with regard to accommodation. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/28/2009 10:51:38 AM | | I can't believe it took 15 pages to answer a simple question. Child support is meant for the non-Cp to do their part to support a kid they brought into this world. Simple as that, why 15 pages, lol. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/28/2009 3:05:43 PM | Child support is putting money in the hands of the custodial parent to be used at their discretion only....and does not and has never reflected or taken into consideration the support of including the non custodial parent in the childs life either.
Simple...or to suggest it simple can only come from the perspective of the only consideration worth understanding is that of the custodial parent. The best interest of the child or children might also be insuring that both parents are involved. And a responsible parent...should be able to cover the cost of raising their children when they are in their care and then one would expect the same when they are with the non custodial parent.
But the simple ones only care what is in their pocket. I would suggest there are no easy answers and no easy question. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 9/28/2009 11:38:23 PM | | the child support i supply goes on clothes/food/nappies/toys.. the local council supply the house for her.. so no way am i paying her bills and if she can handle paying the bills.. my daughter can always live with me :) | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 10/1/2009 9:52:00 PM | There is new legislature being written In NC right now by a Senator in my area- basically that All CS be paid into an account set up by the state in the Child's name- the prinmary custody parent would receive a "Debit Card"- similar to an EBT card- this card could then be used to purchase "approved" items only- such as Childrens clothes, school supplies, kid's toys, food, etc- In other word's -kid needed item's only. Sort of like you can't put alcohol or non food on an EBT card. This would insure that the money was spent on the child/children, not your ex's new boyfriends motorcycle payment or vacation. Buzz is it is expected to pass the House easily, and may set a new precedent for all Sates. It's a great idea in theory!!  | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 10/2/2009 12:15:23 PM |
The local authority, if they are giving help towards rent, work out what the shortfall is and pay the difference as a benefit. It sort of renders as irrelevant what the absent parent pays towards the upbringing of the child. The idea is to make sure that the parent with care doesn't have to face an uncertain future with regard to accommodation.
same here and I am in Canada. Any child support received is taken dollar for dollar so the child doesn't see any increase in income at all so what really is the point in putting the father through all of that in the first place. (This is only for those who have to resort to assistance until they find a job.)
So also never really seen why the women sitting on welfare complain about not getting support if they never get off the system, you don't see it anyway. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 10/2/2009 1:29:50 PM |
the child support i supply goes on clothes/food/nappies/toys.. the local council supply the house for her.. so no way am i paying her bills and if she can handle paying the bills.. my daughter can always live with me :)
She isn't capable of paying her bills if "the local council supply the house for her". You and she should be paying for the house in which your child lives, not tax payers. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 10/2/2009 2:00:57 PM |
There is new legislature being written In NC right now by a Senator in my area- basically that All CS be paid into an account set up by the state in the Child's name- the prinmary custody parent would receive a "Debit Card"- similar to an EBT card- this card could then be used to purchase "approved" items only- such as Childrens clothes, school supplies, kid's toys, food, etc- In other word's -kid needed item's only. Sort of like you can't put alcohol or non food on an EBT card. This would insure that the money was spent on the child/children, not your ex's new boyfriends motorcycle payment or vacation. Buzz is it is expected to pass the House easily, and may set a new precedent for all Sates. It's a great idea in theory!!
It is a good idea in theory but I don't know how it's could be inforced. An EBT card for food is hard enough to enforce. I see many that give their card to others with the pin nunmber and recieve money for their food stamps. But what you are saying how are they going to know if the clothes are for the kid, or if I by a laptop (could be for her or me), or a new bicycle, etc. The same can be done with this card and buy things for other with money in exchange.
Someone said putting the Childsupprt towards the rent and bills ensures the money is used wisely in the childs benifit but no method is perfect and people will always find a way to get around it. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 10/26/2009 8:06:28 PM | | What i dont get is things like once i went to a movie with friends when my ex stopped by. He was upset that I was going to movies while he has to pay support. He goes to movies while I support our kids. He thinks the kids should have everything they ask for and I should have nothing - otherwisr the support isn't being spent properly. I spend way more than he pays on my kids. He claims he is broke because of support, yet its ok for him to have a $200,00 home new cars, snowmobiles, boats, dirtbikes, an rv, etc. I have none of those things. Once he screamed at me that "by the time child support is paid I have as much as he does". That's not even close to true, but what if it was. Is there a law somewhere that says the woman should never have as much as the man? I work hard for that money and far more hours than he does. Why does my making some money of my own mean he shouldn't have to help support them? It's not just my ex that talks this way - I hear it at work all the time. | |
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