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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 8:47:12 AM | The principle purpose of child support appears to be to prolong the agony of the divorce until the child reaches the age of 18, and insure that the parties involved become as bitter as humanly possible with each other. It is an opportunity to continue to fight about money long after the judge otherwise puts that little argument to rest...
Child support was a good thing at one time, but it was written back in the days when the man worked, and mom gave up her career to stay home with the kids. In those days, if a man walked out on his family, they were screwed... and in order to keep that from happening, the concept of spousal and child support were born...
Then you had this thing where, instead of common sense, the support was a certain percentage of your income.
These days it seems to CAUSE custody battles. Cuz the person with the most custody, receives the money...
My ex and I agreed NEVER under any circumstances to put our child in the middle, and had a 50/50 custody arrangement worked out BEFORE we decided to split up.
THEN she saw an attorney, found out how much SHE COULD GET IF she got sole custody, and suddenly, I went from a good father, to someone who should be restricted to visitation only, and a bitter 2.5 year battle ensued.
Her attorney basically billed all she could bill, and then substituted out on the eve of trial. Our custody ended up 50-50, just like we ORIGINALLY agreed to, before setting money on fire in attorneys fees for no reason...
The family law system kinda sucks. Too many kids fall through the cracks, and one size fits all solutions do not work
..bird you said it all right here ..the system is outdated..in canada we still dont have 50-50 ,its time for a change..but our women refuse to let go of the poor victom mantality ,the womens movment has become nothing more then a big help centre for vitomized women.just check any of the thousands of womens help web sites .they will all play there momy card when they fall on there ass..a gold diggers paradice.. lots of women have made this a way of life now..a very protected and unacountable existance .. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 9:33:17 AM | It could be argued that those receiving CS are very accountable. We may not have to prove where it goes but if our children go uncared for, we are accountable to not only our local Children and Family services but also to the paying parent who can gather proof and take us to court for a change in the custody terms. No one cares if our cars need fixing, or we are laid off. The children still need to be cared for.
On the other hand, if the paying parent does not pay, they could go YEARS if not decades in arrears depending on where you live...just ask those of us who are owed thousands with no hope of seeing it. And yes, it is owed to the parent that it is being paid to because it is money that we have already paid out for the care of OUR children. During periods of non-payment by my ex, my son did not eat less, grow any less to need less new fitting shoes or clothing, he did not need less heat, or childcare (actually in my case I was paying out for MUCH more in the past). He didn't need less medical care for the past years (something that is rarely addressed in contempt hearings). Children and Youth, as it is referred to in this area, was not investigating the ex for neglect. If my son would have gone without, it still would have been MY fault and may have even asked his father to step in to care for him (although not likely in this case, but whatever).
Paying child support sucks for responsible and caring fathers, good fathers who put their children first. There is no doubt and the system does need to be revamped somehow but the huge question is how? 50-50 is not a viable solution in all cases but should be utilized whenever possible because it IS in the best interest of the children when both parents are fit and available for this type of responsibility and care.
Back to the OP...
When child support is to be paid, it is for care of a child...any care nec. Food, shelter, clothing, medical needs, school supplies, child care, extra curricular activities, etc...all of the things needed to raise a healthy and well rounded child. With split legal custody in most cases, extra cur., medical needs, and child care decisions should be made as joint decisions so these shouldn't be major points of contention. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 9:55:57 AM |
what is child support meant for?
Some (at least 1) think to buy a 1/2 or 3/4 million dollar house....LOL
Now THIS is the funniest thing I have read in the forums...
you women all assume that the poor single mom pays rent ..bla bla bla..what if she is paying a mortgage with the money she got and the place went up 140% in value,and she stands to make a couple hundred thousand on the property investment ??,
You mean there are NCP paying 6-10 THOUSAND a monthin CS???????
Is there any acountants that can back me up on the number crunching, then didn't leave the pond..
Lets do some 4th grade math real quick..
It would take a minimum of a 1/2 million dollar house to pull in a couple hundred thousand profit on an increase of 140%.
Sooooooo...... 500K.10% down,7.5 APR,20 year mortgage ......House payment around 4K..Then there is the escrow for insurnance for taxes.... roughly another 1K... and I can only guess the up keep on a 1/2 million dollar house...$500??
So in addition to the 600-800/month the NCP is paying per child for CS, they are kicking in at least another $6,000 a month...to pay for a house thats gonna GROSS a couple hundred thousand.....but WAIT you said.......NETS a profit of a couple hundred thousand......who supplied all the funding
...........not the men who are paying according to those ridiculous tables..when the expense money nets a profit of a couple hundred thousand does the man who supplied all the funding have grounds to claim this
Umm. earned income, capital gains..... Oh, no wait she's gonna flip the house avoid that and move into a 1.6 million dollar house....
Just toooooooooooooooo
I don't know much about custody, but there should at least be some law where NCP take a 4th grade math class...
Dude this is something right out of fantasy land... or someone that twisted up a big fatty before they posted...lmao...Come-on.... You personally know someone who is paying 80 thousand plus a year for CS????? What's their name.... what movies did he play in?? Why doesn't he have a 150 dollar/hour attorney fix that???
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 10:57:17 AM | $150.00 per hour attorney?! What is this? 1970?!
Now you need to do some math! Try $350.00 per hour!!!
I can only speak from experience. My ex worked under the table. She basically told the court she had no income. Since she was hiding the money in the bank account of another man, I had no way of proving otherwise for several years - AND WAS FORCED TO PAY 42% of my income to her in child and spousal support - WHERE HER UNDER THE TABLE INCOME WAS DOUBLE MINE!!! A substantial amount of my savings during this time went bye-bye just trying to keep a roof over my head.
When I finally did prove it, several years later, she was ordered to "pay back" what she owed, which of course, by that time, was already spent with no way to collect.
And, by the way, I have always paid 100% of my child's care needs...
So, what, exactly is child support?! To quote Puffy "this is about ADULT SUPPORT. "
The real bitterness though, comes from seeking additional custody just to obtain extra money...
IT STARTS A WAR, THE CHILD IS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE WAR TAKING MOST OF THE BULLETS FIRED FROM BOTH SIDES, AND GETS HURT...
So, as a concept, I think it sucks.
When Child Support is not tied to custody like that, the only people who will seek custody are the ones who actually love their kids and want to spend time with them!
What a concept, eh?! | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 11:08:15 AM | Over time, parental wars take a greater toll on a child's development than any other single factor in divorce"
(Garrity & Baris, 1994, p. 35) | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 1:33:12 PM | You mean there are NCP paying 6-10 THOUSAND a monthin CS???????
Is there any acountants that can back me up on the number crunching, then didn't leave the pond..
Lets do some 4th grade math real quick..
It would take a minimum of a 1/2 million dollar house to pull in a couple hundred thousand profit on an increase of 140%.
my friend you better go back to school..
example 5 years ago interest was down to 4% ,,the payment on a 125,000 townhouse with 25% down was only 600 bucks or so..,,the value of the townhouse now is 300,000..as you can see the cost of living in the home netted a very nice profit of well over 100,000 after all expenses and payments and taxs..this money should go to the children and not the CP's nest egg..if not there should be no further claims for housing ..ok can you do this math yet? and the example is very realistic and typical of what happened here over the past 5 years..and i only used a townhouse in the suburbs for an example.If you got a raise your support payments would be recalculated and you would pay more..where do they take this other money into account ..? the children should have a claim against this equity that was made possible by spending there support payment money on the home..its there home to..and when an expense turns a profit why does it continue to be an eligible claim. ..what the child support was ment for ..? the child ..
When Child Support is not tied to custody like that, the only people who will seek custody are the ones who actually love their kids and want to spend time with them!
take the dollar sign off of there forheads and the gold diggers will move along without sole custody demands and abuse claims,,
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 1:51:31 PM | | So because the CP was wise enough to invest her money wisely the NCP should not have to pay as much? And I for one have my house left to my child if anything should happen to me so by your logic then it would all be ok right? Just trying to understand better. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 1:56:21 PM | the CP was wise enough to invest her money
where do you get off thinking its your money .??.why shouldnt it be the childrens house..?and why do they wait until you die? it was there support money you spent on a house for yourself..i bet they would win a claim in court against you for there part of the equity.. we have seen some seriously wild markets in the north west in canada ,there are fortunes being made using child support money .. and when a living expense turns a huge proffit its not a claim anymore in any sence of the word ..whats with that ?.. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 2:00:23 PM | | Does the CP not work? Does she have no income? I for one can honeslty say that no part of my child support goes to my mortgage. And regardless, the house is a necessity for the children. Would you rather them live in an apartment? I just don't understand at all why you would not want a better life for the children. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 2:12:50 PM | | I was responding to the fact that you said that I or whatever CP uses the support money for the house. Oh well. Nevermind. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 4:00:50 PM | This should spice things up a bit!!! how hard is this ???? its two simple words, CHILD SUPPORT. period!!! end of story. as far as the woman goes, it was also YOUR decision to spilt up. and since this is NO LONGER an agreed upon deal Of 1 + 1 = 1 you are now on your own!!!! you threw your meal ticket out the window because you didnt need it . I can make it on my own. so quit whinning. My opinion is the man should recieve a reciept for every single penny of every single dollar that is spend. and every single penny should be spent on the kids. PERIOD . My support dont say spousal support ,it says CHILD support. If you cant make it on your own sounds to me like YOU made the mistake. I gotta pay every one of my bills. and you think for some reason That since I was stupid enough to jump in bed with you or you were stupid enough to do the same with me ,then I owe you for the rest of my life for sampling what you were given free at birth. Well trust me when I say I aint met the gal yet that has one made of gold , and I gotta pretty safe bet yours aint either ,even though YOU think it is. There are two kinds of prostitution ,those on the streets, and those that divorce and for some reason think the man owes THEM!!! He does have a responsibility for his kids, NOT YOU!!! I for one think ,and I said think because this is just my opinion. That you took it upon yourself to make the move so now ern what you got to ern to pay your own bills. If you CANT do this than it sounds to me that YOU made a big mistake,and the kids needs to be with the one who can do the deal and can make enough to support OUR kids!!! so you made your bed now sleep in it!!!! If it wasnt for my spiritual ideas I could care less if my ex starved to death . She made the move ,I WOULD throw her a bone however because I will see NOTHING starve to death. IF you cant carry the wieght you bruoght upon your self than YOU shouldnt have the kids period. I got my own crosses to bear. If my support order said spousal support I would have NO arguement. That aint what it says. I have already said, I have all the respect in the world for any woman that is trying to help herself but I shouldnt have to make her life a better place because she fathered OUR kids. GUYS!!!! We got screwed when we gave up a rib to bring these THINGS into existance, NO wonder there are so many guy on guy relationships. L.O.L. and if I read right WHO is the one who took a bite out of the apple when it WAS more than clearly explained that this was not to be done and has brought all this destruction on us. I wonder if there is any way to call off this deal and get our rib back so we no longer must deal with the woman that think the world OWES them something . a free ride through life becuase the the way this DOES work ,is all a gal has got to do is pick carefully, a guy who has money or makes money and have a kid or two and kick him to the curb, take him to court,get most times half of everything,!!!! a gaurenteed imcome for say 15 to eighteen years. WOW what a deal. but to all you guys out there ,it is good I am also a guy, because the lessons I have learned from being FORCED to go through all of this ,If I was a woman I would pick more than enough fianancially stable guys ,do that deal, and live in my very own mansion. The ones you all bought for me. LEGAL PROSTITUTES!!!! Put that in your pipe and smoke smoke it!!!! and I guess it is my responsibility to buy the pipe AND the stuff you are smoking in it too!!!! I WILL GET RIGHT ON THAT, HEY YOU NEED A LIGHTER TOO. I AM ONLY HERE TO SERVE YOU MY DEAR!!!!!  | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 4:10:28 PM |
We got screwed when we gave up a rib to bring these THINGS into existance, NO wonder there are so many guy on guy relationships. L.O.L. and if I read right WHO is the one who took a bite out of the apple when it WAS more than clearly explained that this was not to be done and has brought all this destruction on us. I wonder if there is any way to call off this deal and get our rib back so we no longer must deal with the woman that think the world OWES them something . a free ride through life becuase the the way this DOES work ,is all a gal has got to do is pick carefully, a guy who has money or makes money and have a kid or two and kick him to the curb, take him to court,get most times half of everything,!!!! a gaurenteed imcome for say 15 to eighteen years. WOW what a deal. but to all you guys out there ,it is good I am also a guy, because the lessons I have learned from being FORCED to go through all of this ,If I was a woman I would pick more than enough fianancially stable guys ,do that deal, and live in my very own mansion. The ones you all bought for me. LEGAL PROSTITUTES!!!! Put that in your pipe and smoke smoke it!!!! and I guess it is my responsibility to buy the pipe AND the stuff you are smoking in it too!!!!
Wow. We are 'things', 'prostitutes', and rib stealers? Nice. I'm sure there are some women who go after a man because of his money, but they are doctors and lawyers and people earning over six figures. I figure it this way: 100% of my money goes into everything I have for these kids. And I can't even remember what percent of his income is supposed to go into it because right now he's sitting in jail for not paying it. But it's not 100%, nor should it be. I would never want him to be so strapped because of child support that he couldn't support himself and his own life....which is why I actually took off $18,000 of what he owes me - a total of almost $70,000 now. A drop in the bucket you say, but it's a damn sight more than a lot of people would have taken off. But when he had the audacity to tell me he wanted receipts for EVERYTHING back then, that was laughable. I don't have the money to take them to hockey games and restaurants. He doesn't pay, yet does these things with them. In my case, I'm trying to be adult enough to realize that the relationship with him is more important than who takes who where. I cannot believe how bitter some people are and choose not to be that. It's a conscious choice, and when you decide to make it your life gets a whole lot easier. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 4:12:38 PM |
Awwww. Who taught the caveman how to type?  No wonder she left you Now go be a good little boy and write out that check for your CHILD that YOU spawned. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 4:52:03 PM | | Shimahdahnnah!!!! We HAVE talked before, now you see why they still call me Rotten!!! Still alot there ,but I will always remember the day that the judge said physical custody is by this court awarded to thier mother!!!! I Liked to died and think in some ways I did, i should know better than to even get involved in discussions such as this. Screws me up. but here is the deal , i pay over 500 dollars a month in child support, got behind due to my situation so pay another 150 a month in back support have to pay for the kids insurance and half of every thing the insurance dont pay and try to do this now on a 10 dollar an hour job. fact is her significant other dont work she has not worked even two years out of the twelve that we have been divorced and this just continues. I even filed again for custody and to do this had to get a second job to pay for lawyers etc. and now find out she is to be supplied with an attorney< FREE Of CHARGE!!!! Did you miss the part where I said not all women where this way but there are more than a few that are ,and that posting was directed at them I dont care who you are man or woman I think that when one heres the words custody goes to the other there is a hatred that grows that I dont know can ever be taken away!!! I guess its back to the book for another lesson!!!! I just read alot of these postings and thought since some of the postings had absolutly no compassion or even the slightest hint of what some of these fathers feel when thier world is torn apart and the most precise things in thier lifes are taken away these thoughts are there!!! and I still hate over it but am working on it. you take the gross income of a 10 dollar an hour job the normal taxes out ,the child support and back support and then the responsibility of paying whatever is left and tell me what this guy has left to do anything at all with his kids!!! Hey you kids wanna come over and spend the night with your dad. he lives in a tree house, Gee I hope it dont rain!!!! | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 4:57:13 PM | | Johnny, I don't know how it would work where you live, but have you ever thought of getting it reviewed? You shouldn't even need your lawyer for this, but if you are able to show hardship to the courts they usually take a look at it again. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 6:42:16 PM | Ok I am sorry but Johnny or what ever your name is you sit there and call us woman prostitutes (sp) but yet you were the one that stated you were stupied enough to sleep with her.
Well guess what, if you would have kept it in your pant's then you wouldnt be in the situation that you are in so remember that.
and the last time I checked prostitutes were paid for sex, not for keeping a roof over their head's. Yes that is their living but I dont think a guy who sleeps with a prostitute says "thanks here is the money for your rent tonight hope it's enough"!
Give me a f**king break.
You have such bitter words about women, it is no wonder why you are single.
Me and my ex have a great relationship that if he needed the money rather then pay his support then I would be fine with that as I know I can do it on my own without his money. That is my job as a mother. And guess what what he pay's in support is not much I get a total of $300 a month and that went by what we agreed upon. And guess what that doesnt even go to half of what my daughter needs in the run of a month but I dont complaine. If he called me tomrrow and said I cant pay my support tomrrow then I would be fine with that, but at the same time my ex even though we have had our diffrence's has never refered to our daughter as anything bad, has never had a problem with paying his support as he knows he is takeing care of her with it and he knows that I spend every last cent on her for what I get from him.
But now if he were bitter like you I would tell him to take his money and shove it because there is nothing that he could say to me that would hurt me, the only one that he would hurt is his daughter. So if you have such a problem with paying child support and have such bitterness towards your ex and the support you have to pay, why dont you a) sit down and figure out how much it is to raise a child, split that in half (since things should be equal) and then see how much you would be paying! and b) keep your thing in your pant's and then you wouldnt have to spare your ribs for a "THING" as you called it to be put into this world.
I have herd stupid people on this site but you take the first place in my eyes.
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edt: you wana see how my pay out spans out I will give you an example of how mine works ok and then you tell me where you see a problem. And keep in mind that my ex lives at home with his father and doesnt pay anything out but his child support.
What I pay out without counting my half to what my daughter needs in the run of a month (if not more).
My rent is $409,
phone and internet to keep in contact with her father $150,
cable so she has some shows to watch to keep her entertained $55,
heat $130,
transportation $200,
groceries: $250
Add that all up and what does it come to???? And that is not even for the stuff for my daughter.
total for just the bills and so forth $1194.00
Then there is the stuff for my child:
Diapers $49.94
wipes: $23. 54
cloths: $50.00 (if she doesnt go through a growth spurit and need a new wardrobe)
Food: $100 (but that is included in the $250 I spend out)
Meds: $75
Child care because I have to work to keep my end up: $400
Add that up and that comes to $698.48 and then split that between 2 = $349.24
So already he isnt even paying half he is $49.24 short.
And then add $349.24 to my other bills which makes it $1543.24.
So now tell me, a guy that is living at home by choice, and not paying anything but his child support and makes $35,000.00 a year where does it even out???? And I make $20,250 BEFORE taxes are taken off.
So now let's add it all up and see who pay's more and who doesnt complaine because it is my job! that is what happens when you become a parent, dont like it that you have to spend money out then dont have children!
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 7:38:56 PM |
my friend you better go back to school..
Think not... My math works find with your first example...
You wanta try another David Copperfield mortgage example Chef?, then ...lets go...LOL
Your second example is even more out landish.. A 140% on a 125K house is a net profit of 50k.... That would be a quarter of the "couple hundred thousand' you said the FIRST time.
So, lets take your second more unbeliable case.. Now you take a 125k house that a 20% (25K was put down) and this house in 60 months has magical increased by
240% Wow,a market like that and you just sat there and rented????Shame on you.
First question.... who plunked down the 25K? Are you saying you handed her a check for 25K???? to go buy a house, and now ur bytchin???..or it was her's??
While a 100K loan at 4% over 20 years would be $610, but principle only.But again ( Your first example required you start with a 500K house)..And a 475K 20Y loan at 4% would be almost 3K/month ( er... and ins&taxes).. ..
You have no taxes property tax in BC?... Banks north of the border don't require insurance on a loan...? and maintance???If so ... can we round that up to an even $850/month..
Lastly, could you explain why you are giving the CP an extra 10K a year to buy a house. Or are you telling us the your child support is exaggrated that much...
Again I'd recommend a custody attorney...
Again I'm gonna recommend a $150/ hour one, because thes seems like an e-z problem to rectify...Yea,yea,yea.... They are from 100/hour to 500+ an hour here (I had 8 in three years), but I see no need in paying the top end, for such an e-z problem... Grab one fresh off the bar for cripes sake... He11 don't they have pro/bono attorneys up there???
and if you are NOT giving the X a clear $850 above the CS, explain(with example #2 while taking $300 (your kids need a roof) and her matching $300 and BUY instead of rent... and why should NOW because the market has a windfall it should be divided up.
Since the house increased by 240% in example , I'd believe the taxes & ins. had a sharp increase... Are you kick out an extra couple hundred a month for the increase too??
Just wondering...
Again, I'm just wondering if your CP had a misfortune like Katrina, or Market fall out as an inter city spread, or government accusition, would you fork over your home????
I still am truly amazed at every angle people come at.
What's next.... Hey, hey, hey... She hit the lotto with the $5 power ball ticket.... That was the $5 she took from my CS check...... | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 7:46:26 PM |
She hit the lotto with the $5 power ball ticket.... That was the $5 she took from my CS check......
Hey, I would totally share if I won powerball with the $177.00 I got last year. lol I would. After I got a nice big fat college fund nested for my kids, and bought my new house, car, boobs, and man.  | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 7:47:27 PM | If I may...all of you who insist that it was the mans fault for the creation of a child better go back to basic biology. I paid child support for years, I did not begrudge that. What I hated and still hate is that its assumed that our income alone is all that is required to raise a child.
Additionally, it all but forces the kids to be used as pawns in a chess game between people. That is SAD! Child Support is not, and was never intended to be the sole source of support or income for the children. If it is, I suggest that perhaps Dad should take over the custodial parent role and relive the burden. If your getting what your owed be happy that you are, there are plenty who aren't.
Think about what you really want for your kids. Then think about what you want them to remember about you both. Trust me all the ****ing, fighting, and lying will haunt you for the rest of your life when they are old enough to think it out for themselves.. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 7:50:12 PM |
What I hated and still hate is that its assumed that our income alone is all that is required to raise a child.
I don't see anyone here assuming that at all...in fact I think every woman posting here has said they too, have jobs. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 8:40:27 PM | If you have never stood in open court while some sh*t head attorney belittles you with baseless insinuations or that overused, out of context, term DEADBEAT, you have not truly lived through the most humiliating moment in ones life. Now compound that humiliation every two years and you know where I come from. What for you might ask? A 30.00 a month increase in support that was previously offered and refused. She was furious when I pointed out that at 30.00 a month, it would take her almost three years to pay her attorney and that she still hadn't recouped her monies for the layer from 2 years prior. But from then on she decided to accept the numbers offered.
Custody? There was no such animal as a father getting custody, the courts wouldn't even entertain such thoughts. When I asked to have the support stopped because the child lived with me for 18 months, you would think I just shot Christ. "But sir, she still has bills to pay!!" was the response.
Sorry if that all seems Jaded. The family court system, such as it is, has proven time and time again that it is totally inept at resolving even the simplest of issues. Each time I offered the correct amount of increase and each time I had to stand there while some legal dumb ass did their impersonation of Perry Mason. They thrive on Pomp and Circumstance and pale on issues. | |
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| what is child support meant for?
Posted: 3/20/2008 9:50:21 PM | I must say, that I kind of agree with what you are saying. I, myself am a single mom, I have a son that will be 16 in a few months, and a daughter that will be 12 soon. I have had them all my live. They have never went to spend time with threir father, nor did their fathers want to come and get them to spend time with them either. There have never been bad words spoken to the children by either party about the other party, because as an adult I believe that is just wrong. A child should be able to make up it's own mind after time, not have it made up for him or her after hearing what G-ma says or mom says, because face it, that realtioship is over gone awwy, but the kids can build a new foundatuion and meet them on ccommon ground to get to know them then there is a chance for them. So, I do it all. I wake them up before school, get them fed , argue over who whants a certain kind of lunch, no no,that pink top that I caan see through, ya know the pink one that lets all the boys look as welll?!?! NO! But I digress...It is me that has gotten a house, not the greatest house, but ut is clean and has room for us. We could fix it up a bit and do some amazing things with it in time, but again, it is I that buy their clothes or a new instrument when they need one, or cleats, or soccer gear, the fundraisers from school every year. I am the one they come to in the middle of the night stating that they do not feel well, and I note that they have a fever, and know what to do for it, and how to make it better. Case in point, my daughter was home sick, school had called, so he went to get her from school, he was closer, I would meet him at the house and take over so he would not miss much work (wheras now I will) got home, there she is all ooggy looking, not feeling well, and he is trying to get her to drink a coke....So I took over the situation (yes I tend to baby my kids when they are sick) 5 minutes later I had her resting quietlt on the couch in her pj's, face washed with a cool wash cloth, dry toast with beef broth to sip on. Within 10 minutes she felt much better, after giving her the needed meds she needed, all was well once again. So, child support pays for that too, it is just not the things you can throw at them that are tangible, but support also means when the kid has a problem then talk to him. Boys need hugs too. My ex owes' me nothing, he does however owe my chidren and money is the leaast of what I am concerned about, would like them to have a great meduical insurnace plan though. They need love, and promises that are kept. I know this is an issue about money, but that money pays for them to have fun as well as the roof over theirheads, the food that they eat, thirteen size 14 shoes you now have to buy since the last pairs were 14 are too small now, which was bout 4 months ago. Try pricing shoes for boys, and that is just the shoes!! I could go on forever, but I won't. Child support should be just what it is. For the child..kids need electicity its for the kid, kid need to be warm, it helps the heating bill, the kid fell and broke an arm well then is for that purpose to...ya know It it not just takign the money and gving it to the kid so they can go hog wild in a toy store, especially if tthere is no home to take it to. People should pay their child support. If you don't want any contact with the kid, the write a later stating why, and be honest, they are smarter than you think. But don't take away the CS because you are mad, they relly do need it, it just goes to different areas of the household sometimes, but it is all to make sure that the children are well cared for...bottom line!  | |
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and i have no idea what you are responding to now? ..have a nice long weekend ..
