| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 3:30:18 AM | I've watched some t.v. commercials, and I've noticed that any kind of family type situation, the hubby is not necessarily ugly, but geeky or nerdy,
Yeah, I've noticed that too. I'm waiting for the TV show that features really hot men going crazy over the totally average woman. Maybe then I'll watch something other than Monk. (come to think of it, his assistants are way hotter than him too)
And about the original topic......with as many married men who cheat, because they say their wives don't want sex with them, do we really want to encourage women to marry men they do NOT find attractive?
This would seem to compound the problem. lol | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 4:51:23 AM | Ugly dudes can be adulterous husbands from hell too.
If you're going to go thru the trouble-- make it worth while with
the guy of your desires! | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 6:30:07 AM | 82 couples is hardly a big enough sample to mean anything. I do think the small grain of truth in this is that women do tend to have a more realistic view of their own attractiveness than men do so they are more able to be happy with a less attractive partner. Men do tend to shoot a bit higher on the attractiveness scale than they can offer themselves, so yeah... they likely are more happy with their "catch" when she is more attractive then they personally are.
What this survey doesn't say a thing about is that attractiveness is different to everyone and other factors that are not visible from the outside tend to hold more weight longterm than attractiveness alone does. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 6:39:40 AM | A yah....right...
Maybe that's why you never see two "beautiful people" in a successful relationship... "Belinda Bombshell" and "Billy Beefcake" together...each couldn't muster up enough responsibility towards the other to keep a bird alive...
Even if my financial situation were top-notch....no "pretties" for me... | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 6:54:54 AM | TallTexann,
I agree with you on all points except the one about women having a more realistic view of their own attractiveness. I've talked to a fair bit of women who think they are absolute knock outs and wonder why men don't flock to them. They'll talk about how sexy their bodies are and how in shape they are, but if they'd take off the massive Dolce sunglasses they might see they are 30 pounds overweight and it's not spread out nicely! LOL I'm not saying they are vile or anything. But I know I don't have the looks of George Clooney or the body of Matthew McConaughey. I think my attractiveness comes from within in terms of my confidence and my personality but I'd NEVER go around saying I'm dead sexy, aside from in a joking manner! I might say how appealing I am to the opposite sex. But yes, there are men who think this way as well when they are in fact rather low on the beauty scale.
And yes, I do know the difference between beauty and great features. Many large women are beautiful. Would I say they have smoking bodies? No. There are probably a select few who might. But I guess beauty is somewhat subjective so maybe I should just shut my trap already. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 7:34:01 AM | Well?????? I did go to the site and listen to the blog by the friendly Dr. He was very open to coment on this discussion. Interesting! Got me thinking. I am trying to mentally tally all the sucessful marriages that I know in comparisson to all the unsucessful marriages that I know of. Of course, it is hard to really judge appearances, because, as one person stated already, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I did notice though, that the average of marriages that have the husband not as physically attractive as the wife, whether due to age, genetics, etc....., seem to be still quite steady. Another finding....in my mental tally of this.....is that these husbands 'SEEM', and I stress the word 'SEEM", to be more attentive to their wives than those the other way around. They seem more appreciative of the wife's, looks, attributes, career? Who knows! Maybe just a fluke?
I do know of one marriage that the wife is so physically attractive, she could have been a model! And her husband is not that 'hot' looking, but man! Does he ever spoil her! And is she ever happy with their life together! She did tell me once, that she felt the many other men that tried to date her were shallow and she felt they were just after her to show other men they could catch her? Her husband, on the other hand was the most sincere of all the men she dated, and SHE had to ask him out!
go figure! | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 8:14:38 AM | Not saying I am pretty and he is ugly, however, I have noticed in my own life- the hotter the guy- the more likely he is to stray. I knew when I married, he was not a lady killer, but he was mine and attractive in my eyes.
I guess the way I see it, the more attractive the man- or woman- the more attention they receive from the opposite sex. Everyone loves to have their ego stroked from time to time, and constant stroking from outside influences tends to break our focus from what really is important-our marriage. So I guess the theory that ugly spouses- or rather, less attractive spouses will cheat less- kinda makes sense.
I know I used to get a lot of attention when I first got married- and I was a young cutie. I saw that I was loving the attention a little too much- never cheated- but it was nice having people stroke my ego daily, and I can see how easy it would have been to stray. I also noticed myself gaining a lot of weight, and paying less attention to my upkeep trying to kill some of the attention I was receiving- cause we all know guys don't like fat chicks right?(at least the pool is smaller anyway)Less attention=less opportunity to cheat. But at the same time, my spouse was becoming less attracted as well. It's a tough world we live in.
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 8:38:56 AM | | I guess what it boils down to is the more attractive a guy is in general the more female attention he likely gets and the more temptation he is likely to feel. Also, guys with average to sub-par looks tend to focus more on their personalities as well as other things they can compensate with. This may be sexual prowess, attentiveness, willingness to share the load around the house, etc. They tend to treat their women like princesses and aim to please moreso than the more attractive men. I think many women will admit that the men they have been with that were selfish lovers were generally the better looking of the bunch. Am I off base here ladies? I know that has been the case most times with the women I've dated. It's along the same lines as men saying large women make the best lovers because they aim to please so much. There are many other nasty things said about this whole line of thinking but I won't go into detail as it's rather hurtful I think to those women. But from my experience it's pretty spot on. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 9:10:27 AM | | I've always wondered why I'm still single. Women judge me by my good looks to be un-marriage-worthy. Now I've got it figured out. I'm going to ugly myself up. | |
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jf468
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Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 63 | |
| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/25/2008 9:28:08 AM | I do think the small grain of truth in this is that women do tend to have a more realistic view of their own attractiveness than men do so they are more able to be happy with a less attractive partner. Men do tend to shoot a bit higher on the attractiveness scale than they can offer themselves, so yeah... they likely are more happy with their "catch" when she is more attractive then they personally are.
I'm a woman and I don't completely agree with this. This works both ways. I have seen some average looking women and slightly below average looking women reject average looking men due to looks. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/26/2008 3:21:26 PM | [I think many women will admit that the men they have been with that were selfish lovers were generally the better looking of the bunch. Am I off base here ladies?]
i'd say you are off base. Way off base. "better looking" has not been even close to the same "selfish lover" in my experience, nor has "better looking" equated "lothario". It doesn't take looks or lack of looks to have a clue, nor do good looks in a partner necessarily mean they will stray. Anyone who simplfies people/catgorizes people in this manner is missing a lot of good, interesting experiences in life. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/26/2008 3:49:52 PM | NoseyNeighbor in response to:
What cave did you emerge from? Is there no end to this profound ignorance or is it a disease.
1. A proposal is written before a grant are awarded.
2. No, you would not be able to secure a grant because the requirements are education and expertise in a particular area.
3. You obviously have no concept of a "pilot" study.
4. Phrenology was discarded in the early 1900's.
Simply put, your arguments make little to so sense at all and you admit to being a felon. ************************************************************************
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well where do I start?... it was meant tongue in cheek.
1.Yes, I have applied for a Canada Council Research Grant in the past, I have received 2. I do know what it takes to get a government grant in Canada.
2.I have hired many pollsters in a 20 year period to produce 'results' that were to my advantage when I worked in the political arena. Yes, it may sound twisted and borderline fraud...but it was all in the wording of the Poll Questions and the choices that people were given as answers.
3.Yes, I know what a Pilot Study is... see above #1.
4. for Phrenology...the comment I made was to show that some people are looking for intelligent matches.. the 'cranial lobe' was just in reference to intelligence..not in reference to someone with fluid on the brain which makes their head appear larger.
sheeeeeesh...relax.
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/26/2008 4:52:49 PM | If the husband gets extensive plastic surgery and goes from "extremely ugly" to "mildly attractive", what happens to the marriage?
(Yes, I'm thinking about that episode of the The Simpsons where Moe gets plastic surgery and drastically improves his looks. It all goes back to The Simpsons, folks.) | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/26/2008 7:49:14 PM | | Some people think Steven Tyler is hot. This is definitive proof that there is no single standard for looks so studies like this are just plain goofy. Oh, and Rea Perlman thinks Danny De Vito is the hottest man on the planet. It's about love, not looks - or should be. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/26/2008 10:22:01 PM | ^^yea but Steven Tyler, Mick Jagger, and David Bowie are rock gods and they could wear pink unitards and bring that sh!t back. They could dress like women and women would still throw their panties at them. Look at Prince.
And look at Rhea Pearlman. They say people don't date up or down much, and it's proof at it's finest there! LOL But you are correct. Beauty is not a definitive characteristic. It's in all of us. Even the fugly ones have something beautiful about them. It just takes a special person to find it! LOL Okay okay, I'm only kidding now. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/26/2008 10:30:52 PM | | The reason it worx is because the woman treats the man like crap, cheats on him with the plummer, and the ugly dude is too scared to leave cus he don't think he can get anyone else.. Unfortuneatly one of my best friends is in this boat.. Except for his wife was Screw'n his good friend who happend to be the Best man at the wedding.. But my friend says that he's not gonna leave and will do everything in his power to make things work because he can't see himself with anyone else... He's a stonger man then me thats for sure.. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/27/2008 6:48:36 AM | This could explain why I have been proposed to twice........maybe i'm uglier than I thought! 
I doubt looks play a major part in the success or failure of a marriage, bad people will cheat on their partners no matter what they look like. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/27/2008 7:07:25 AM | haha..i used to date ugly fellers cause i figgered they'd be grateful..shootfire! i done decided ifn a fellers gonna be underfoot alla time, he might as well be easy on the eyes!
course in my family tree , there's points awarded fer not bein kin! | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/29/2008 12:12:16 AM | Yea but ugly men want sex too and how in the world is a woman supposed to get all excited about a ugly guy?
There are nasty women that think they are hot hot hot... and men too, then there are really pretty women and men that dont know it. Rare but I have seen it. It is very strange to watch a horrible looking woman with a horrible attitude talk about how great she looks, how confusing it was that all those men were not lined up begging her... and it is obvious to everyone else. I feel they must have heard from Mommy all of thier lives how pretty they were and believed it, but I would not know what explains the ugly personality and bad attitude. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/29/2008 12:30:09 AM | | Allywilde (Message 7) has it right. A cheater doesn't care about the wife's or girlfriend's looks. She could be the hottest, beautiful and also sophisticated and sexy woman on the planet and, metaphorically speaking, they'd be sticking (or trying to stick) their limp noodle in any pot they could find. | |
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| Ugly Husband Key To Successful Marriage
Posted: 3/29/2008 12:34:40 AM | Cherry1000 (Message 22) is 100% correct on this one. Personal morals, values, ethics, loyalty -- that's what count.
I know some very ugly men who are constantly humping anything they can find -- even women who look like dogs. They can have the most beautiful, nice, loving, kind, sexy, brainy girlfriend, and they are still looking out there for any quick fu*k they can get. They lie, they cheat, they lie about not cheating. It's disgusting! Even the 70+ old men who can't do a dam*ed thing are out there lying and cheating, and thinking they're God's gift to women. Apparently, they haven't taken a look at themselves in the mirror in a long time. | |
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