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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 11:45:57 AM | OP, as has been stated before, a lot of women are attracted to the bad guys, and leave the good guys out in the cold. And then the women who had a choice between the good guys and bad, and picked the latter, and just came out of a bad relationship and were cheated on, start asking where all the good guys are, and the good guys come along again, trying to get their attention, only to be rejected again, and so on it goes, it's a vicious cycel, at least that's what I've seen in my experience of it. So the advice I would give you is stop being so attracted to the bad guys.
We faithful, decent men are out there, we're just waiting to be given a chance.
I know this sounds like a kind of harsh message and maybe not exactly what you were hoping to hear, but honestly I'm trying to help. I hope all goes well and I wish you all the best. Good luck! ;) | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 11:46:10 AM | Girl, "Are you, sure your choices are good"?..I dont believe all men are unfaithful...Not any different than woman...I believe most are faithful, all the moons need to line up correctly for this to happen | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 11:48:01 AM | Interesting question. Everyman is different. I for one and looking for my one true love. When I find her I will have eyes for no other.
Mabye it's age, upbringing, examples set, and moral values.
Since I am an old fashioned romantic, I tend to believe that with true love, anything is possible.
If you were really and I mean really and truly in Love, why would you have eyes for another? I can't even comprehend it.
Good Luck OP, I am sure that you will know when you find it.
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 11:50:40 AM | Nope,all the nice,and honest,decent guys are gone.
They either got sick of being used as a door mat.
Or got sick of people telling them, that they were spineless!
So we have all devolved into lying,cheating,scumbags.
Or they got tired of waiting for faithful,and decent women! | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 11:52:11 AM | I'd care about what 'some' think, but essentially, that's the type of response I mean. The statistic comes from a recent news story I read. The story came from a study that a university did back in 2007. Point proven! ;) There sure are a lot of bitter, angry men out there, aren't there? :( Be careful, ladies, or you might end up with one of those bitter, angry men. Ewww!
Oh, and if you don't want to be used as a doormat, it's fairly simple. You learn to get over your anger, stop blaming women for your problems, and start communicating on a rational level. It's that easy! | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 11:58:59 AM | OP, if you find every guy you date cheats on you, you are doing one or more of the following:
(1) in a relationship, you expect something when not offering enough yourself
(2) you don't properly communicate your requirements
(3) you choose your partners poorly
It sounds like (1) isn't your issue, so communicate your dealbreakers better (no cheating, have "the talk"), or make better choices with your men. Good luck. | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 32 | |
| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:00:21 PM | I'd care about what 'some' think, but essentially, that's the type of response I mean.
Obviously not as you are just attempting to elicit some kind of negative response to attempt to justify a assumption, that is passive aggressive, I wonder where your problems come from hmmmmm ......
The statistic comes from a recent news story I read. The story came from a study that a university did back in 2007. Point proven! ;)
Nothing is proven, the best you can do is cite the source as "evidence".
There sure are a lot of bitter, angry men out there, aren't there? :(
Not really, though if that's how you choose to see the world then in your world I'm sure there will be.
Be careful, ladies, or you might end up with one of those bitter, angry men. Ewww!
Only if they, like you believe that all men are, and then choose one to support their/your beliefs as the majority of the guys will have nothing to do with attitudes like that, good luck getting over it and letting it go.
Oh, and if you don't want to be used as a doormat, it's fairly simple. You learn to get over your anger, stop blaming [insert generalisation here] for your problems, and start communicating on a rational level. It's that easy!
Now all you have to do is accept responsibility for your experience and stop blaming yourself and you're half way there ........... oh the irony.
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:16:25 PM | Well, I could sit here all day long and defend this drivel, but personally, I have a life, hehe. And, since I'm not at all interested in defending the writer or the study, I think I'll skip trying to prove that which they wrote.
I realize though, that many people think you owe them a defensive response -- but, as for me, I'm not one to play the headgames most play, as my profile states.
Nonetheless, as you can see for yourselves, ladies...this is what you could end up with -- constantly defending everything you say, simply because the person chose not to believe. It doesn't matter whether they know for a fact or not. Not only that, but, you would have to take the time to look it up for them too, instead of them doing the legwork themselves. Yes, sadly, you would have to provide proof of everything said to some of these people. Personally, I wouldn't touch that with a ten foot pole, but if one of you ladies would like to, feel free! | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:23:41 PM | | Oh...and by the way, you guys will be happy to know that 70% of the women also cheated, according to the study. Hmm...almost even, now a days, eh? | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 35 | |
| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:31:21 PM | Well, I could sit here all day long and defend this drivel, but personally, I have a life, hehe. And, since I'm not at all interested in defending the writer or the study, I think I'll skip trying to prove that which they wrote.
Well I wouldn't call what you're saying complete drivel, just that you can't cite or even name it. So if you can't or don't even want to defend it, that doesn't really give it or what you're claiming much credence. If there is a stud or anything past opinion, bring it up and we can talk about it, opposed to making claims and they backing off to try and feign the victim of the situation.
I realize though, that many people think you owe them a defensive response --
My point exactly being that you're trying to get one, hence why I'm pointing that out and you're tactics and behaviour to try and get a reaction to justify what you're claiming, which appears to be more hearsay.
I'm not rising to it for you, just pointing it out to differentiate what you're doing is different from the topic.
but, as for me, I'm not one to play the headgames most play, as my profile states.
Your behavoiur says differently.
Nonetheless, as you can see for yourselves, ladies...this is what you could end up with -- constantly defending everything you say, simply because the person chose not to believe.
Indeed, when being told there is a study that proves 80% of men cheat, I'd like to see it, that is all.
It doesn't matter whether they know for a fact or not. Not only that, but, you would have to take the time to look it up for them too, instead of them doing the legwork themselves.
Because it likely doesn't exist or you would cite it, even by name if not a link or reference.
Yes, sadly, you would have to provide proof of everything said to some of these people. Personally, I wouldn't touch that with a ten foot pole, but if one of you ladies would like to, feel free!
Trying the passive aggressive again, ironically you don't have to defend against "these people" as they can spot the kind of assumptions you have a mile off and wouldn't play your games, which is smiler to the behavoiur the OP seems to be suffering from.
Oh...and by the way, you guys will be happy to know that 70% of the women also cheated, according to the study. Hmm...almost even, now a days, eh?
And can we even get a name of said reputable study ? | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:32:28 PM | | Hi OP,really sorry to hear that no man has been faithful to you but im sure you know its definately not your fault,youve just been unlucky,i cant understand it myself,as for me being in love with someone means you look at the rest of the opposite sex in a different way and one genuine lady is more than enough.True love should get stronger as the years go by so Im sure its only a matter of time till you meet someone as lovely as yourself.best wishes. | |
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Jemue
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Joined: 1/26/2005
Msg: 38 | |
| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:33:41 PM | hehe...point proven! Need I say more, ladies? ;)
Indeed, passive aggressive and blaming behaviour will be called out all the time. I can see why you attract the kind of guys that you claim all are, good luck with the healing.
Found even the title of the "study" yet ?
This is funny because I can't say I've known 1 woman that can be!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh sush this is all about bitter generalisations and blaming, get with the program ;)
Oh you have, well done :P | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:38:37 PM | You sound sort of bitter... or mis-informed.
As many here have said, it's not one gender. Both do it, but not EVERYONE does it. It may just be your choice in men.
There ARE good men out there with real values and self control 
so keep looking | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:43:08 PM | One woman that can be faithful? There are some, same as men. But, it seems that so many are dealing with anger issues now a days, based on the fact that others haven't treated them kindly, or they've cheated on them, that they can't let go of the past. Many have held onto that anger and thus, haven't been able to find one that isn't that way, because of such anger. It's kind of like a catch 22 situation, if that makes sense...at least, to me.
This is kind of what I see others doing, especially here:
1. Lady 1 or guy 1 cheats on significant other (You're the significant other.)
2. The significant other gets dumped or dumps lady 1 or guy 1.
3. Significant other assumes it will happen again, and does everything in their power to prove such to themselves.
4. Significant other meets lady 2 or guy 2, and the process starts over, but since significant other is assuming it will occur again, the significant other simply doesn't put their all into the relationship and expects it to fizzle from the start. When it does fizzle, significant other blames lady or guy 2 and 1, and assumes all ladies or guys are like that.
5. It happens over and over again. No one let's go of the anger. Everyone assumes everyone is like that, and presto...angry person is left, assuming everything, whether right, wrong or indifferent.
Interesting concept, eh? | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:45:23 PM | Because someone says they're seeking honesty or they say they're honest, it means they have a problem with bitterness? Really? Hmm...ladies, whatever you do, don't say you're interested in honesty, hehe.  | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:49:38 PM | Need I say more, ladies? And, I won't respond to the anger or silliness of that one, anymore. ;)
Yes you do need to say more, you need to give the name of and the link to the study.
An article in the back of Cosmo does not qualify as scientific research. | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:49:41 PM | Sweethang100,
So, why are you so bitter? I have never cheated. Have you? Now, the reason so many guys on this thread are giving stupid answers is because it's a stupid question. You ask a dumb question and you get dumb answers.
Of course there are decent men out there. However, in order to deserve one or find one you have to be decent yourself.
And that means lose the negative attitude towards men. | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 12:58:27 PM | That's funny, I was always taught that there are no stupid questions, only stupid answers. ;) I'm not bitter, far from it. Nope, I've never cheated on anyone. Thanks for asking, though. Of course, there are decent men out there. I never said there weren't. And, equally so...there are decent women too. :)  It's not a negative attitude, when someone has run into it time and time again, and they're asking a question..are there decent men anymore? That's not a ridiculous question, and for anyone to purport that it is...well, I wouldn't want to be with someone like that. Personally, I think anyone who puts down a question, is telling the person that what they think isn't valuable.
By the way, I don't know the link, and I really don't feel the need to pull it up, but you're free to seek it out yourself if it's that important..and no, I DON'T HAVE TO LOOK IT UP MYSELF AND PROVIDE ANYONE THE INFO. You see, I KNOW WHAT I READ! hehe ;) | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 1:05:15 PM |
Actually, according to statistics, 80% of men cheat, when in a relationship. And it doesn't have to do with the woman, just more capability of easy access, possibly presented at the wrong time (during times of uneasiness or normal or average stress in any relationship.) Anyway, according to the study, there are 20% of men that don't act on it, even during difficult times.
I am from Missouri the show me State.......whenever I see statistics I want to see where they are from and who conducted them.......Show us
And I also again want to point out........Why is this a Gender issue? This is a Male and Female problem this is a moral issue not a gender issue.
The OP stated that she has had problems with finding Men unfaithful....several different Men not one.....so this takes on a whole different story....if she is finding the same Type of person over and over.......She is the one picking them she is finding something in these people that she is attracted to....she is the one with the problem she is the one doing the picking. If you keep having the very same problem over and over it is yourself that has the problem and responiblity to fix it.....it is no longer about one person being unfaithful.....guess its easier to whine than to shine.....
 Blue | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 1:12:26 PM |
By the way, I don't know the link, and I really don't feel the need to pull it up, but you're free to seek it out yourself if it's that important..and no, I DON'T HAVE TO LOOK IT UP MYSELF AND PROVIDE ANYONE THE INFO. You see, I KNOW WHAT I READ! hehe ;)
Fabricating phantom studies shows a lack of honesty, integrity and intelligence. | |
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| is there faithful or decent men out there
Posted: 3/25/2008 1:18:17 PM | ^^^ "Fabricating phantom studies shows a lack of honesty, integrity and intelligence"
But that CAN'T be....it says right in her profile, she's honest??? WTH??! rolleyes:
~ds~ : | |
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