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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 11/5/2005 7:17:02 AM | Advise on how to snow ski
"Go that way. Really fast. If something gets in your way, turn." - Better off Dead
More Better Off Dead quotes:
French Girl: Instead he uses the chance to put his testicles all over me.
Guy: I'm sorry, put his what?
French Girl: Testicles. You how, how you say, octapus?
Guy: Oh! Tenticles! N-T. There's a big difference.
Yeah it seems like my Jimmi is learning the International Language. You know... the International Language. Love! The language of Love!
This is a small town, dude. An ink splot on the road map. (holds up a can of whipped cream) I can't even get real drugs here. | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 2/20/2006 6:56:54 PM | High Fidelity
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"Should I bolt every time I get that feeling in my gut when I meet someone new? Well, I've been listening to my gut since I was 14 years old, and frankly speaking, I've come to the conclusion that my guts have s**t for brains."
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"Laura: Listen, Rob, would you have sex with me? Because I want to feel something else than this. It either that, or I go home and put my hand in the fire. Unless you want to stub cigarettes out on my arm.
Rob: No. I only have a few left, I've been saving them for later.
Laura: Right. It'll have to be sex, then.
Rob: Right.
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Rob: Charlie, you f**king b**ch. Let's work it out. | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 2/21/2006 7:11:36 AM | Shaun of the dead
Shaun: It's not that I don't wanna spend time with you, cause I do. It's just... Ed doesn't have too many friends
Shaun: [about Ed] He's not my boyfriend!
Ed: [handing beer to Shaun] It might be a bit warm, the cooler was off.
Shaun: Thanks, babe.
[winks]
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Shaun: He's a laugh, alright?
[about Ed]
Pete: What, because he can impersonate an orangutan? Fuck-a-doodle-doo, Shaun!
*talking about his step dad
Shaun: Did you know that on several occasions... he touched me?
[long pause as Barbara turns to look at Shaun]
Shaun: That wasn't true. Made it up. Shouldn't have done that. Sorry.
Shaun: No, no, no, no, no, wait, we can't bring her back here.
Ed: Why not?
Shaun: Well, it's not really safe, is it?
Ed: Yeah, look at the state of it.
Shaun: Where's safe? where's familiar?
Ed: Where can I smoke?
[Shaun and Ed pause then slowly make a realization]
Shaun: [cuts to dream sequence a third time] Take car. Go to mum's. Kill Phil - "Sorry." - grab Liz, go to the Winchester, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all of this to blow over. How's that for a slice of fried gold?
Ed: Yeah, boyyyeee!
[Shaun and Ed clang weapons together]
Liz: You, hang out with my friends? Sorry - 'a failed actress and a twat?'
Shaun: Well, that's a bit harsh.
Liz: Your words, Shaun!
Shaun: I did NOT call Dianne a failed actress! | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 2/21/2006 7:11:45 AM | Doug Butabi: You can take our phones and you can take our keys, but you cannot take away our dreams.
Steve Butabi: Yeah, because we're, like, sleeping when we have them.
Steve: What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up? What's up?
Doug: Steve, slow down.
Steve: I can't help it man, it's hottie overload.
Doug: Just pace yourself.
Steve: Ok... What's up?... 2, 3, 4. What's up?... 2, 3, 4...
Mr. Zadir: Wait a minute, did you just grab my ass?
Doug Butabi: No.
Mr. Zadir: Do you want to?
Doug Butabi: No... should I?
Mr. Zadir: Dooey, did you just grab my ass?
Dooey: Sir, from where I'm standing, that's a physichal impossibilty.
Mr. Zadir: Oh, I know your tricks, Dooey!
Wedding Crashers:
Chazz Reinhold: Grief is nature's most powerful aphrodisiac.
Chaz Reingold: I almost numchucked you, you don't even realize!
John Beckwith: Claire's mom just made me grab her hooters.
Jeremy Grey: Well snap out of it! What, a hot older women made you feel her cans? Stop crying like a little girl.
John Beckwith: I wasn't crying like a little girl.
Jeremy Grey: Why don't you try getting jacked off under the table in front of the whole damn family and have some real problems, jackass. Hey, what were they like anyway? They looked pretty good, are they real? Are they built for speed or comfort? What'd you do with them? Motorboat? You play the motorboat?
[makes sputtering motorboat noise]
Jeremy Grey: You motorboatin son of a ****! You old sailor you! Where is she? She still in the house?
John Beckwith: What's wrong with you?
Jeremy Grey: What do you mean "what's wrong with me?" What's wrong with you?
John Beckwith: No, what's wrong with you?
Jeremy Grey: No, what's wrong with you? You're projecting!
John Beckwith: Drop it.
Jeremy Grey: You drop it! You stop projecting on me! Why don't you go enjoy yourself while I go ice my balls and spit up blood. | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/2/2006 7:54:01 AM | Scooby Doo.. we're gonna die!!.. we're gonna die!!... think positively... we're gonna die QUICKLY!!!!!..  ... that is sooooooooo ME!! | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/3/2006 1:27:46 AM | Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
ACE (unrecognizable accent):
How cun I be getting dis vork dun
mit all da shouting? What for is
dis shouting?
REPORTER:
Who the hell is that?
MELISSA:
That? That's…
ACE/HEINZ:
Heinz Kissvelvet. I am Trainer of
Dolphins. You vant to talk to ze
dolphin, you talk to me!
REPORTER:
What happened to the regular
trainer?
ACE/HEINZ:
Vy do you care about the dolphin?
Do you know him? Does he call you
at home? Do you have a dorsal fin?
To train ze dolphin, you must zink
like ze dolphin. You must be getting
oonside ze dolphin's head!
Just yesterday I'm asking
Snowflake… "ee, eee, eee." He
said, "Eee, eee, eee, eee." Und
you can quote him.
Ace spits at the reporters' feet. Podacter jumps in. | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/3/2006 7:27:36 AM | | You guys really put on a great funeral here ............Yea , we give first preference to people who kill themselves in our bathrooms .....................................You'd never get a turnout like this at my funeral...........Don't worry i'll come and.....I'll bring a date (The Big Chill ) | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/3/2006 7:06:03 PM | "Walter, what the hell is that?"
"It's the ringer, Dude."
(The Big Lebowski)
"C'mon, get in rhythm. Black guys help the white guys."
"Yo man, what'd he say?"
"He said, 'Black guys help the white guys.'".
(Stripes) | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/3/2006 7:45:19 PM | "...No, embarassed like getting caught ****ing your cousin..." - Super Troopers
"PC load letter? WHAT THE **** IS THAT?!" - Office Space
"I'm Humping, the Butler" - "Who's ****ing the maid?!" - The Whoopee Boys
"There's a thousand to one chance my willy got in the way" - Black Adder II, Episode "Bells".
"When I was in high school, I thought I had mono for a year. Turned out I was just really bored" - Wayne's World
"Mr. Burgundy, you have a humongous boner" - Anchorman
"Nice hat! I bet you get a free bowl of soup with it, too! Oh, but it looks good on you, though!" - Caddy Shack
"...you put your little deer lips to the cool water, then BAM! A ****ing bullet rips part of your head off, your brains are lying on the ground in little bloody pieces. Now I aks ya, would you give a **** what the sonuva**** that shot ya was wearin'?" - My Cousin Vinny
"Look lady,does it sound like I'm ordering a ****ing pizza?" - Die Hard | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/3/2006 11:13:28 PM | i'm a blue collar fan...so this is all from blue collar DVD's...lol
Ron White: Ron: Last night i was sittin' in a bean bag chair naked eatin' cheetos.i was flippin thru the television stations when i came across a (whatever the term is he used to describe a donation comercial...lol) from Dallas...he said...are you lonley?...Ron: are you wasting your time in bars persuing sins of the flesh? ...Ron: this guy's good!...are you sitting in a bean bag chair naked eatin' cheetos? Ron: YEEESSS SIIRRR!...do you have the urge to get up right now and send me a donation of a thousand dollars?...Ron: CLOSE! i thought he was talking about me there for a second!
Larry the Cable Guy: (the scene where he talked about how it would be if female sanitary products were advertised on the nascar vehicles) "hey how did you get tickets to the tampon 200?.....well my daddy pulled a few strings and...."
Bill Engvall: You dont know what reality is untill your in bed trying to make love to your wife and your dog is watching you at the END OF THE BED!.......you throw the bra across the room...dog brings it back!
Jeff Foxworthy: why do women always worry about if their butt is big or not? well gee men dont even realize they have one untill it starts to itch!
Larry the Cable Guy: Now THAT was funny right there....i dont care who ya are...THAT was funny.
Larry the Cable Guy: my ex girlfriend was wearing them crotchless under-britches one day when i got home from work...she stood there in front of me and said..."you want some of this?"...i looked at here and said...hell no!....look what it did to ur under-britches!...think u need some niller (aka vanilla...lol) plug-in's there...some niller plug-in's
ok i'm done for now...but there are so many more i LOVE! LMAO! | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/5/2006 10:36:49 AM | "For me, socks are like sex; I just don't seem to have enough of either" - Black Adder III, Episode Dish and Dishonesty.
"Don't sell yourself short, judge; you're a tremendous slouch" - Caddyshack
"Would you like a chocolate-covered pretzel?" - Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
"Don't **** with the Jedi master, son" - Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back
"License and regristration, please...CHICKEN****ER!! BACAW!!!" - Super Troopers | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/10/2006 1:49:40 AM | | And you ........yea you pull that stunt and flash your piece out on the lanes . I'll take it away from you , stick it up your a$$ , and pull the trigger till it goes click.............Jesus......................................you said it man, noone f^@%s with the Jesus.............................(The big Lebowski) .The dude just wanted his rug back , it really tied the room together lol...............................Phones ringin dude .......................thanks Donny .....................................................................................................................................................................May i borrow your towel , my car just hit a water buffalo.................................(Fletch) | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/13/2006 10:43:12 AM | well either dirty harry " nuthin wrong with shooting..so long as the right people get shot"
or
Sam Elloit in "we were soldiers" when the sgt said "Its a beautiful morning sgt major"
and his reply was "What are you now the f*$%^$! weatherman?" | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/15/2006 11:51:49 AM | Monty Python "What are you going to do? Crawl at me?!"
not from a movie, but from the show Undergrads "GIVE HIM THE BROKEN FACE!!!" | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/15/2006 12:32:50 PM | from rat race... this little girl is in the back seat of her dads car and has to go to the bathroom really bad and keeps telling her dad to pull over. he keeps refusing and she says, "but dad, i'm prairie doggin' it" lmao... i loved it!
and another movie i don't remember the name of it or even what they were talking about but this woman told these twins that this guys breath smelt like someone died fartiing in his mouth... lol. | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/15/2006 6:43:19 PM | Oh, you're in the red? Well I'm a mushroom-cloud laying motherf@@ker, motherf@@ker. Everytime my fingers touch brain I'm like Super-Fly TNT. I'm the Guns of the Navaron!
-Jules Winnfield Pulp Fiction | |
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| What's your favourite funny movie quote?
Posted: 5/15/2006 8:25:51 PM | This...is my BOOMSTICK!!! (Army of Darkness)
You gonna bark all day little doggy, or are you gonna bite? (Reservoir Dogs)
What? What aint no country I ever heard about! Do they speak english in what? (Pulp Fiction)
Are you stalking me...because that would be super (Van Wilder) | |
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