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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/1/2008 5:11:18 PM | scorches,
Well let me start by saying I DO NOT like your headline. I find it a bit offensive. Also you need some pics, without them you will probably not get many emails.
Also you have nothing in your "about me" section, so there is really nothing to review. Do some work on your about me section, then come back for a review. !!
Good luck Sweet :) | |
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/1/2008 5:17:11 PM | iceroque,
Let me start off by saying that this is My review thread, and I am the only one on here that does reviews. If you would like to get reviews from many other people, you need to start a review request thread of your own. That way you will get other reviews for other people, male and female.
Your profile is fine, but you have left out information about the lady you are searching for. Now you need to write a nice paragraph about the lady you are searching for. Her personality, her interests, hobbies, goals, and so forth. let the ladies know just what kind of lady you are attracted to.
Once you have added the ladies part you will have a much nicer profile. Hope this helps you out and good luck in your search.
Sweet :) | |
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/1/2008 5:29:21 PM | MitakuyeOyasin,
Ok I have taken a second look and here are the things I would consider removing, for one reason or another. Mostly because they sound kind of angry and negative, and judgemental, and a profile is just not the place to air these things and feelings.
Hope this helps you out and good luck.!! I just like a more positive and happy profile, not so much negativity and angry statements, and talking about all the negativitey in the world. Happy words attract happy people, angry words attract angry people. Just a thought.
Sweet :)
I prefer self-suffiency over self-indulgence, and thought provoking conversations over the mindless drivel the media force feeds us.
I also believe that the overwhelming majority of what we see and read today is puerile garbage: the saturation levels of violence, the sordidness and filth, the heavily sanitised and controlled media, the bird-brained shouting and screaming 'game' shows on TV, for example - all designed to keep us unaware.
Put it this way. I never really expected to find a man like that here in this incredibly superficial venue.
He lacks cunning, deceit, sarcasm, cynicism, guile high drama. He operates from the cooperative mind, not the competitive mind, and has deprogrammed himself from consensus reality. He is wide awake and knows what is happening in our delusional society. He is not into the giving or receiving of 'points' or attached to labels, like 'success'/'failure' or 'secure'/'insecure' or 'good'/'bad'. He does not identify the "I" with his job or how many dollars register in his bank account this week.
I'm not impressed with today's society: the road rage; school massacres; millions of children in the West without fathers at home (the fatherless generation); skyrocketing levels of abortion; the rise of the feminine man and the muscular, tattooed woman. I don't care what 'news' Paris or Britney makes or which 'idol' is cool or who won Survivor or which wife was 'swapped' or how many corpses lie in the mortuaries of the myriad crime shows keeping us all quiet and sedated. | |
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/1/2008 5:36:03 PM | CTownBob,
Ok lets start with your pics. You need a more happy smiley pic for your main pic. Maybe a couple more closer up pics having fun and showing off your personality.
You need some more work in your "about me" section. Add some more info to your part. Tell the ladies a little more about your personality and your hobbies and what you can offer a relationship. Then you need to write a nice paragraph about the lady you are searching for. What kind of lady are you attracted to, her personality, goals, interests, what she does for fun, and what she should be able to offer a realtiohship. Let the ladies get an idea of who you are and what you want from a partner. Adding a little humor is always a plus.
You should also add a couple more interests to your "interests" section. Maybe a few girly things, that the ladies may be interested in. Other than that you are doing ok. Good luck in your search.
Sweet :)
Sweet :) | |
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/2/2008 3:36:31 PM | sox mangold,
Ok you have a pretty good start of a profile. I like your pics, but you need to change your main pic to the pic in the blue shirt. That is a better pic for your main pic. Also you shyould NEVER have on a hat or sunglasses in your main pic !!!
You need to add some more interests to your "interests" section. Maybe at least 6 more. Think about the ladies when you add them. Maybe a few that the ladies might be interested in, you know "girly things" lol.. Well make them more interested I think.
You need to add much more to your "about me" section. Remember to always capatalize your "I's". Very important. You need not describe yourself as in your first sentence, all of the info in in your personal info at the top of your profile. You need to add a little more info about yourself. Maybe your goals, what you can offer a lady in a relationship. Slip some of your personality in there, and a little humor goes a long way. Make all of this into a nice paragraph.
Then write a nice paragraph about the lady you are searching for. What kind of lady attracts you, her personlaity, goals, interests, what she does for fun, and what she can offer you in a relationship. Give the ladies something to go on to see if they think they may be a good match for you. Don't make them guess, they are not mind readers.
Once you have made these additions and changes you will have a more desireable profile. You are a very attractive man, so now you need to let that personality shine through your profile. Go get em !!!!
Hope this helps you out and good luck in your search !!
Sweet :) | |
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/2/2008 3:49:49 PM | RenaLo,
Ok lets start with your pic. You need more pics. You need a nice, close up, smiley pic for your main pic. Much closer up then the one you are using now. Then a couple more showing off your personality. Then a definate one is a full body pic, taken closer up not far away. With more pics you should get more contacts. Makes it an even playing field.
You need to add more interests to your "interests " section. At least 5 more. Think about the guys when adding them. Add some that the guys may be interested in, not just the girly stuff you now have.
Your "about me " section needs work. What you have written is probably what is making most men not contact you. It makes it sound like you just want to lay around the house, but with a lot of work and patience, MAYBE, the guy can get you up and out to do something !!! You need to delete what you now have and start over. Make yourself sound more interesting, energetic, and fun !!! Nobody wants someone that is a hermit and just has no interests or energy. You need to bring out your persoanlity and make yourself sound like a really great catch. You are fun, exciting, full of energy, adventerous, and so forth. That should all be done in a nice paragraph. Then you need to write a nice paragraph about the man you are searching for. His personality, goals, interests, what he does for fun. THIS ALL HAS TO BE POSITIVE !!! Nothing negative. Let the guys know just what kind of man you want in your life.
Once you have added the pics, and made the suggested changes, I think you will have a much more desireable profile. Take some time and do a little work and then come back and let me take a look again. Hope this helps you out and good luck !!
Sweet :) | |
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/2/2008 4:43:34 PM | Hotlisted88,
Ok let me say this first !! You are a hottie !!! I love your pics, they are great.
You need to add a few more interests, but think about the ladies when you are adding them. Maybe a few the ladies might be interested in, you know girly things !!
I would suggest to change your selection from "hang out" to at least "dating". A lot of the ladies on here have an email block for anyone looking for "friends', or "hangout" or "email/chat". Dating will get you a lot more contacts !!
Your about me section is pretty good, but it needs to be split up into 2 paragraphs, makes it easier to read. There is also some stuff towards the end, that I would suggest getting rid of. It sounds a little sarcastic, angry and negative. I have copied and pasted your profile and split it up, and made some changes. Take a look at it below and see what you think. If you like it then use it !! But you still need to write a nice little paragraph about what kind of lady you are attracted to. Her likes, goals, interests, and so forth. Hope this helps yo out and good luck in your search !!
Sweet :)
The perfect blend of and "hood" and "intellect". Im originally from NJ (east orange), now residing in mesa, and working in Scottsdale. I love my career path as I have spent most of my life trying to find my way like most. The journey has allowed me to meet alot of people and go through alot of things that have shaped who I am today (both good and bad). Please know that what comes with this is my "inability" to judge others:) I would love it if the people reading this thought the same way, regarding that. I have lived a really interesting life, so much that writing a book where Initially the idea, was meant to document for my kids, but it may be published after its all said and done!
I am an absolute kid "lover"! Always have been, maybe its because they tend to like me, and their innocence is admired. I am honest to a fault, and have a sensitive side that peaks out once in a while. I currently have a son, who turned 7 in december, my little mini-me. I also have a 2 yr old daughter whom I do not have the option of raising right now. My son is my life, but I am not looking to have any more children, so if you have som already, thats terrific.. (Im fixed) I Im a loyal person with alot of love to give but only when it is appreciated and reciprocated... *
Do what you do and shoot me a note if you want. I take pride in being down to earth as i possibly can. If I dont respond today...it may be tomorrow, or the next day..but I always reply. Im usually online in the middle of the night since I am a serious night owl (I work nights).
Now here is where you would write the section about the lady you are searching for !!! | |
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/3/2008 7:34:46 AM | Hi there.
It seems you offer to review has been vary popular with everyone.
Would you be kind enough to review my profile too please.
Much appreciated.
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| Would love to help you out with your profile
Posted: 7/3/2008 10:49:25 AM | I just made a Major *Edit*.....
Apparently, some people saw the old one as being 'Needy', 'Whiny' and 'Baggage-carrying'...
So....I simplified it....to a Vanilla - run-of-the-mill , short but sweet statement... | |
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