moist
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Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 26 | |
| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 8:23:36 AM | | There is someone for everyone. At some point in your life you will find them, who knows when that will be. Just go on enjoying life and someday BAM there they will be! | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 8:24:52 AM | | I was just asking because I want to have a family and I wanted to start before I get to old. I'm happy in myself and think I would make a wonderful wife and mother but after 28 years of looking I'm not sure it's going to happen for me. | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 8:31:11 AM | bretsgirl,
I didnt have my son until I was 4 months from my 30th birthday. I also made the decision to have him on my own. There is no rule saying that you can not have a child by yourself.
@jet anytime darlin | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 8:32:14 AM | I don't think some people are "meant" to be alone because that would insinuate destiny, in which I do not believe. I do think some people are better off alone because their personality just does not allow for someone else to be accepted as part of their life. | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 9:26:43 AM |
I don't feel that you can rightfully speak for everybody on POF. I'm sure there are some here who feel that they want to, or are meant to be alone. It's not how I feel, but I'm sure there are some who do.
I wasn't claiming to speak for everyone on POF. While you may have misconscrued it,my statement speaks to the fact that EVERYONE who is on POF is on POF to make a connection of some type with ANOTHER. In this sense they do not want to be alone.Opinion,yes,based upon logic. My statement does not speak to what someone "feels". That I cannot and do not do, without knowledge of individual.
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 9:35:12 AM | Maybe. Sometimes I wonder if I'm not meant to be alone. I'm kind of happy with the status quo, though sometimes I think it would be really nice to have someone to share things with and talk to. But dang....you can get really spoiled having everything exactly the way you like it...ya know? I am accountable to no one by myself. I can wear whatever I please (and believe me, I sometimes wear some odd stuff...I have my own style) and not have to put up with the "Er....you gonna wear THAT?" Nobody is going to nag me about doing the dishes if I decide to let them sit in the sink overnight instead of washing them right after dinner. Nobody to pester me about "What's for dinner?" the minute I walk in the door from work. If I want to make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for me and the monster, he is more than happy with that. Shoot...I don't even have to clean up after anyone except me; my son cleans up after himself.
So sometimes I think how great it would be to have someone, but other times I think "If it aint broke, don't fix it." *shrug* Maybe I AM meant to be alone. LOL | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 9:40:18 AM | @brets
sure they are. In the bible God says ITS BETTER TO BE ALONE !!!!
lol... do you feel you can not be happy if you do ot marry? There are plenty of miserably unhappy married people you know.
Finding love does not mean you have to be in romantic love. You can learn to love yourself, love others in non physical ways... sex is only the physical side of romantic love.But some people try to call the physical act of love.. love.
It can be preverted and maniplulated by people who call it love.. when its just a way to get someone to have sex with them without the investment of feelings or care for the other person other than a sex object.
There are single people who live very full lives. You should also know that the most lonley people are often the ones married and 'stuck' which happens quite a bit due to kids, finanances and many other things.
Your real young bretsgirl, Im sure you will find someone :) Just be sure you arent mistaking LOVE for something else (lust) and you might find a good partner.
Be patient, your whole life is ahead of you !!!
PS you can have kids without a man you know :) and there is always adoption too | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 9:55:00 AM | relationships magnify the human experience. alone is something we come into life being, we also leave alone. during our life time it is a gift to have people to share love with. love is something that happens on many levels - we love family, friends, mates, pets, etc. it is truly something special when we find someone we adore and love to the core of our soul. this is indeed a soul mate, of which i think we have many, especially if we have lived more than one life time.
love is the strongest power in the universe. it takes us through a whole gambit of feelings. i for one do not think people are meant to be alone while we are living. i do believe we must have an open heart and compassionate soul in order to benifit from the experience even if pain and suffering are part of it.
with metta,
-maxine
(p.s. my spelling stinks) | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 10:15:02 AM | I hope not! I think that it implies some pre-destined plan where we all lack free will and have no power over our existence. Pretty depressing, I think. For that same reason I don't buy into the "there's someone for everyone" myth.
I think some of it comes down to timing, luck, being around people, and tons of other things I have yet to figure out. | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 10:25:50 AM | | I think at this point too, we should delineat the difference between "Alone", "Lonely", and "Not with a mate" because currently I am not with a mate, but I feel far from alone OR lonely. | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 11:53:56 AM | | I'm not saying that I wouldn't be happy if I never get married, but I don't want to raise a child on my own. I know circumstances happen and just because you get married I might end up a single mother but what's wrong with wanting to have a husband a children to share my life with. Like I said I think I have a lot of qualities that would make me a great parner for someone and I just wish I could find someone. | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 12:20:11 PM | ^^ You will. Just don't look for it too hard. Let things settle for a while.
Enjoy your life without it. Learn to be self sufficient and take time
to get to know yourself. I've been alone almost my whole life. I've
had friends and relationships which did not last. I did and am yet
raising a child on my own. There is nothing wrong with that. I
prefer to be alone than with someone who would not appreciate me,
or would cheat on me. I've raised my child alone because it is my
belief that a child will grow much happier and healthier both
mentally and physically in a calm and fightless environment. What
good would come to a child when he or she faces the conflicts
amongst the members of the immediate family? The struggles
between the parents, the legal procedurs, torned between
parents, back and forths, mixed emotions?
Do not be afraid of being alone. Find a way to make it your way,
one day, when you are strong enough, because you have learned
how to accept yourself as you are, you'll find the right man for
yourself. It is never late. I am now 48. my daughter is 14. I've
just started a new start, because, I do know who am I, what I
want, and how am I going to be. And, believe me, my love is only
a matter of a few weeks to happen!
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 12:23:45 PM | ^^^^ Bret you seem like a sincere caring person. And I believe that when the right man finds you he will be very lucky. Don't feel bad to the point where it feels that you will always be alone or that it is destined to be alone forever. Based on your profile I would be glad to see that the right person has finally stepped in and that you can be very happy. So don't give up on wanting someone to spend your life with. Alot of people are in that same boat, including me, but you want your years ahead to be filled with love and happiness, not despair and misery. Best to you.  | |
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Sylum
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Joined: 5/12/2005
Msg: 46 | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 2:18:11 PM | No one is ever alone. I've been "alone" but with the same friends for 35 years (my best guy friend I met in kindergarten.) Last summer after a bad break up I was on the phone with my Ex and just devastated with the idea of being "alone." Then it hit me how full my life really was. Ten minutes later about 40 children arrived for my drama workshop, eager, creative, rambunctious actors looking to ME to direct them. I looked at those faces, realized I was making memories for THEM and thought, "No, Rapunzel, you are not alone!" That was a moment of clarity for me, and like many here, I started to be comfortable with the idea that I might never marry again or love deeply. I've dated a lot since then, but nothing hyper serious. And that's okay.
We are alone at various times for valid reasons, important reasons. I spent too many of those times feeling sorry for myself. Once I realized how much I have to give I never really felt alone again. Sure I would like a date every weekend . . . or maybe every other one, but I sure like my time with others, too. I like my time with ME!
Rapunzel | |
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| Do you think some people are meant to be alone?
Posted: 5/30/2005 3:05:50 PM | | I believe some people cope better with being alone then other people. I think everyone would like companionship in one form or another, but it all depends on what you are willing to give up for the companionship. The people who can stand being alone will not give up as much and it makes it harder for them to find their mate. | |
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