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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/3/2008 6:16:12 PM |
I am 48, and the reason I so desperately want to get married is because the huge fortune I have accumulated over the years will go to the federal government if I do not find a wife much younger than I am to help me spend it.
Hey, if the fortune is large enough and your health is already failing, come to Canada and I will marry you. Its legel up here now....javascript:smilie(' ') | |
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/3/2008 9:00:27 PM |
I am 48, and the reason I so desperately want to get married is because the huge fortune I have accumulated over the years will go to the federal government if I do not find a wife much younger than I am to help me spend it.
....Much younger?.....damn, scratch that idea.
...maeflowers
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/7/2008 5:03:41 AM | I am definitely NOT with you on this one.
I can not tell you how many women I have talked to that want to get married again and the guy they are/were with has 'commitment issues'.
I think that men and women as well fall on both sides of the fence. However, the divorce laws historically have been structured such that the man was, most often, really burdened financially in the divorce settlement and leaving the man 'gun shy'. Some of these things are changing. Many have yet to.
This is classic. You see this in as a common pun in sitcoms, the media and in real life over and over.
Here is a good joke about this..... "The Divorced Barbie Doll"
*One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a Toy Shop and asks the sales person, "How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?"
The salesperson answers, "Which one do you mean, Sir? We have: Work Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for $19.95, Ballerina Barbie For $19.95, Astronaut Barbie for $19.95, Skater Barbie for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.95".
The amazed father asks: "It's what?! Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?"
The annoyed salesperson rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers: "Sir..., Divorced Barbie comes with: Ken's Car, Ken's House, Ken's Boat, Ken's Furniture, Ken's Computer, one of Ken's Friends, and a key chain made with Ken's testicles."
*
As for 'need'. OMG Get over yourselves. I don't 'need' a woman to do my laundry, clean, cook or anything else. Well, maybe if I wanted to have sex - I would need a woman. I don't "switch hit". 
Might I mention how many profiles I see where women say "I don't NEED a man. I want a man...." I can not tell you how unattractive I find this. We all get it ladies. We know you are independent, self-sufficient, etc... I don't need you to TELL us this. Nor do I need to tell you this about myself. If you have to point this out - then something is wrong.
Because some guy might have been a bit overly earnest and you are not into it, you think all men are such. Get over it. | |
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| Why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/7/2008 7:23:50 AM | I disagree with this totally, alot of people circa my age, have just come out of a 20-25 year relationship, why the hell would they want to get married?
Alot of people stay together for the wrong reasons or are too scared to sort it out.
But, certainly the men that I have talked to or come across in the real and virtual world do not want to get married, in fact they want a little teen tit on their arm to boost their ego.
They certainly are not interested in someone of my age, who knows who they are, has an opinion, runs their own home, brings up the kid on their own etc, and knows what they want... that is far too scary!
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| Why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/7/2008 8:05:07 AM | I sit here today and celebrate to the day, 5 years of being single!
I am proud and very happy of what my life has become! To answer this question? Nope, this gal hasn't met any men that wish to "hook up to the ole ball and chain"!
Live together? They seem much more open to that concept than actual marriage.
I am with my buddy Miss Mae...Marriage is not an option for me presently and I surely do not foresee it in my future. I don't have the need, maybe never will either! | |
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| Why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:45:48 PM |
As for 'need'. OMG Get over yourselves. I don't 'need' a woman to do my laundry, clean, cook or anything else. Well, maybe if I wanted to have sex - I would need a woman. I don't "switch hit".
Might I mention how many profiles I see where women say "I don't NEED a man. I want a man...." I can not tell you how unattractive I find this. We all get it ladies. I think that perhaps you (men) do NOT.....ALL get it....otherwise...why the divorce Barbie jokes?
A lot of the confusion may be in that women DO realize that men don't need us to do your laundry, cleaning or cooking...or anything else...but that most men do NOT realize that women don't need them to pay the mortgage payment, car payment, electric bill, buy groceries....OR fix the toilet.
LOL! and the funniest thing is.....that a male came come in here and state that he needs a woman for ONE thing...and ONE thing ONLY.....which is sex....and everyone thinks....well Duhhhh, who didn't know that!!!! But if a woman says the same.....she's generally NOT belived in the first place.....and scorned for being independent. What's up with that dude?
CONGRATS on the anniversary of your Singleness Moonchild!!!! LOL! | |
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| Why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/7/2008 2:02:51 PM | ^^^Awe thanks Grandma!
But if a woman says the same.....she's generally NOT belived in the first place.....and scorned for being independent. What's up with that dude?
Actually would have to disagree with that statement darlin. She would get called not so nice names and you know that!
OT: No, as I said, most men, least the ones I have met, are simply not in a hurry to marry again. They are still trying to recover financially from the last one, much the same as a lot of us gals are doing! | |
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| Why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/7/2008 3:28:46 PM | Well call me a wus if you will but I think perhaps I need a woman. After the divorce I told myself NEVER EVER again! But after 10 years I have found myself gradually drifting away from normality. My language skills have deteriorated, my social skills are not quite up to snuff either. While not a derelict or mindless drone I do find myself tending toward the hermit, old sage, or crochety old man sort of life. Heck I'm only 46.
I am fully housetrained and don't need anyone to do my chores or pay bills. Not that I'd turn down an offer but I primarily NEED companionship. I'd be tickled to help you as well. To go into my house and hear something. Or even, dare I dream, see a smile. Being a large middle aged man restricts you from many activities that couples take for granted. Try walking about the campground alone and people don't "notice" you, they "watch" you. They smile and wave and look to see where their kids/stuff is.
For many years I taught my sons that you don't "buy" anything from somebody who approaches you. Make sure you do the approaching. I realize now how wrong that is and have tried to correct it but I feel the same concept in dating and don't really know how to deal with it.
About 2 years ago I help some little lady <5' change a tire. She hugged me and kissed me on the cheek. I really liked it. Something as simple as walking by and touching her hair, brushing a shoulder, or the warmth as you just sit and enjoy life together. I truly feel sorry for anyone who doesn't need these things.
I'm not desparate and will take a while to get to know any gal who chooses to date me as I will NOT make the rush mistake again but I'm not dead set against marriage. | |
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| Why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/9/2008 4:09:38 PM | Grandma, I was trying to make a point by 'saying' comparable things that I see women saying in their profiles.
The fact might be that I don't NEED a woman. However, the fact also is that I do DESIRE one because one would be necessary for me to have a 'relationship' with one.
RE: stating one not NEEDing another... As I said - if you have to state it - something is wrong.
That is like people telling you how much money they make or how intelligent they are. If they have to tell you this - something is amiss.
As for me stating that I only need a woman for ONE thing - you are taking things out of context Grandma. I was making a point by taking it to an extreme. If you were to look at my profile - I make no mention of such things, more - what I desire.
I was married for a good bit and I know full well what my wife meant to me and our relationship. I miss that and I would like to have that again.
I tell you this - my wife was so very different than any of the women I typically see posting in these forums. She knew the value I placed on her. On some levels, no I did not need her, however I would NEVER say anything like that to her. Nor, did she likely need me. However, when a relationship works - people don't even begin to think along those lines. They are 'part' of you and you them. Much like a vital organ. Something that you can not live without.
Perhaps the problem is we are talking from two different perspectives here. Me from the perspective of a good relationship/marriage and most the others here from that of divorce/failed relationship.
Have you not had a 'good' relationship where you couldn't wait to see that person??? Did you not feel a 'need'????
When I lost my wife - I was crushed. I can not describe the depths to which it pained me. Need - perhaps. Much like a heroin addict needs a fix. Desire - absolutely. Want - there is no doubt.
You can take my words, remove them from their context and insert them into your own to twist the intended meaning, however I know what I had, what I felt and how it worked - I am all good with that. I believe that my wife was as well. All this without ever talking of not needing the other. | |
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| Why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/9/2008 5:40:08 PM | I'm not 'Desperate' . . !!
I'm looking for a genuine LTR . . not necessarily including Marriage...
but I _Could_ be convinced to go that route, too..!!
I've even made offers to a few Ladies, here . . but most had been polluted
by those Bad-boy-types..to the point that they don't trust ANYone, anymore...!!!
C'est la vie...!!
The Search Continues..!!
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/9/2008 9:31:04 PM | | WOW, what a topic, Is it the men? Or the woman? Listen up people? There is this word called Loneliness! There is Life, and you have one life and only one life. You should live that life for today, not tomorrow, because that may never come. If you are happy being alone, horray for you, if u are lonely, but not desperate, LIKE myself, and want to get married or be in a relationship, but are afraid of the commitment, it will happen, just dont Rush. I have lost 2 family members inthe last 2 yrs, both Suicide due to being alone after loosing a loved one. Dont let that happen to you, get out, do something, but DO NOT GO OUT AND GET MARRIED, just to be with someone, you know i have a daughter, son in law, 4 grandkids, and my dtr, and son in law have been together over 8 yrs, NOT MARRIED MIND U, but happy, and that is what counts. Why do we need a piece of paper saying marriage to fullfill our lifes? Just the companionship of someone would be nice, but again, I feel it is not just Guys, there are plenty of woman who i have met who went out w/ guys, gentleman, and other such names, all to be divorced in a few months. WHY? out of being lonely, or just having that Married thought? Take time to smell the roses, and if that means living together, great. But live life to make you happy, not people looking in at you. | |
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/10/2008 1:44:52 PM | Desperate to get married ?
My kids are raised and I enjoy my freedom.
Do what I want.......I can even leave the toilet seat up without anyone saying anything......lol.
If I met the right lady then I'd settle down again, if it was right I might even get married again.
But I'm sure not desperate. | |
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/12/2008 9:09:21 PM | After scrolling down through all the fascinating replies to the original question,
one can't help but realize this idea of men [wanting to get married again] has been entertained over, and over again to the person that posted the original question.
Men over 40 must be asking You, or telling You a dream about Marriage?
How else could it have become a topic within your own mind?
(Said politely of course.)
If the men over 40 that you've met, give the impression of wanting to get married
again, it's likely due in a huge part to you, and what you represent to them.
Are you sprinkling basil leafs around them, casting a spell of ooh, la, la over them?
(I'm saying that in a playful way of course.)
I'm way over 40. I was married for 20 (1) years, and the urge to remarry never
occurred to me since.
Just hazarding a guess that those Men talking to you about marriage, must love something about you... that... you drive them crazy... to want to marry you.
It's not an over 40 "thang" at all.
If statistics say other wise, surely they were assembled by someone wanting
to leave work early that day.
~smiling~~~
Both Men, and Women need "People" in our lives at all stages of life.
As far as a contract of Marriage? I'm doubting it highly.
Accept! ... for the types of Men you are allowing yourself to be comfortable with.
John
(Oh, and just a heckuva theory of course)
Fun Topic. | |
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/12/2008 9:58:40 PM |
Here is a good joke about this..... "The Divorced Barbie Doll"
*One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it's his daughter's birthday. He pulls over to a Toy Shop and asks the sales person, "How much for one of those Barbie's in the display window?"
The salesperson answers, "Which one do you mean, Sir? We have: Work Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for $19.95, Ballerina Barbie For $19.95, Astronaut Barbie for $19.95, Skater Barbie for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.95".
The amazed father asks: "It's what?! Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95?"
The annoyed salesperson rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers: "Sir..., Divorced Barbie comes with: Ken's Car, Ken's House, Ken's Boat, Ken's Furniture, Ken's Computer, one of Ken's Friends, and a key chain made with Ken's testicles."
I loved this, its the funniest thing I read in years...of course I'm going to copy and paste.
Might I mention how many profiles I see where women say "I don't NEED a man. I want a man...." I can not tell you how unattractive I find this. We all get it ladies. We know you are independent, self-sufficient, etc... I don't need you to TELL us this. Nor do I need to tell you this about myself. If you have to point this out - then something is wrong
...*Hmmm, frantically searches her memory banks trying to recall exactly what she said in her profile*
...maeflowers | |
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/13/2008 10:02:13 AM | Odd, I was under the impression that Mr. Ken entered the Barbie relationship w/out testicles in the first place.
Perhaps he had previously been married/divorced. 
That would explain the sports car & slightly foofy attire he seemed to have a penchant for. | |
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/13/2008 10:45:57 AM | | i was on my owne for 7 years after my first divorce had lots and lots of good dates but never found wright one but still friendswith most of them i am single dad of 26 23 and14 year old boys who live with me so never one to rush in to hevy relationships but it happens imet some one she made all the moves within 8 months had sold my house put my 2 elder boys in to flats and moved in with a single parent of 2 children with my 14 year old son every thing was rosey we marred after 6 months big do 15000 grand next purchest her house from lanlords under right to buy boy was i in love well hear i am 2 years 4 months later filing for divorce on grounds of unresnable behaviour her oldest son 17 now 18 never worked stole from me my son and his sister stole booze took drugs smashed up rooms in temper was returned home by police druged up my son was so unhappy so was i but still she took his side but i am is mummy he needs me now i live on my owne with my son happy but poor LESSON DONT RUSH IN | |
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| why are MEN over 40 so desperate to get married??
Posted: 5/13/2008 2:08:01 PM | not so fast!!!! i am guessing you are not contacting any men yourself, only responding to ones that contact you. I've been devorced for eleven years, i'm just now thinking i want to date or maybe have a relationship at all...just this week i joined on here, my first dating site most unmarried couples i have knnow that were together for long periods, it was the woman complaining the guy won't marry her, not the other way around | |
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