| | Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????Page 9 of 10 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10) | | YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT to "FEEL ASHAMED OF HIM!!". You SHOULD BE! Decent, LOVING men,.... DON'T act like that! AS a Marine officer how do YOU think the BEST way 'to lead ,IS??" How about,..........BY EXAMPLE, OK? Fair? Is not "love, the same thing, in a way? Would he be proud of you,...if YOU acted like he did? You KNOW BETTER. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 4/25/2008 11:18:37 AM | | it sounds like you have a good guy.to me its a guy thing no worrys good luck.hey next time you get a labtop dont snoop remember it was befor you.and reading any of that stuff is onley going to get you mad same for him. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 4/25/2008 12:29:05 PM | YES. Almost all guys talk this way. The ones that dont are usually the shy, socially awkward ones. Simply because they dont have the balls to talk that way. But dont take this the wrong way ladies. Im not sure you understand the level of competitiveness for guys... on every level. You HAVE to say these things (I mean not a giant smutfest like your man did, a comment here or there with an average level of raunchiness will suffice) or you lose face.
Also, he doesnt have to be putting on an act. It could be the other way. Most likely it is. The act is how he is with his friends. Id say I let my guard down and act myself WAYYYYY more if its with a woman I like then when Im with my friends. So dont fret too much.
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Ignoble I TOTALLY disagree. You may bow down to peer pressure but a real man doesn't. Talking about your woman is wrong; YOU DONT HAVE TO SAY THESE THINGS. Your more into being cool to your boys than loyal and respectful to your woman? I think it takes NO balls to bow down to grade school peer pressure. It takes balls to do the right thing. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 4/25/2008 12:29:13 PM | I certainly wouldnt talk to mates about a partner like that, what you do with your partner in that department is private too just you and him/her.
To talk about a woman as though she is just a piece of meat is degrading, If you loved a woman/man that much then you shouldnt talk about them like that.
I have had mates talk about great p**sy, and to tell you the truth found it embarrising, so I change the subject as quickly as possible.
So answer is no, we do not all talk like that, just the shallow ones I think. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 4/25/2008 12:38:36 PM | Ok, let's be honest here. You are "head over heals" for this guy and aren't going to leave him for any reason, let alone over the advice from some random people on the internet. Someone could give you a recorded conversation of him saying all those things about you to his friends and you would still let it slide. Why? Because you want to believe he is the real deal. He tells you what you want to hear and you believe him regardless. How is anyone here going to change that?
The bottom line is, you are going to ignore red flag after red flag until he does something that even you won't be able to forgive. Sometimes you just have to learn the hard way.
Not trying to be mean, just being honest.
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Jackal; I agree totally; I think I posted it somewhere. Usually the younger the woman the easier it is to get them to what I call, "worship mode". That is the level some guys; especially the younger ones; want their women to get too.
When a woman is in worship mode, she can have video tapes of her man having 3 somes, DNA evidence, a taped confession, and witnesses but she won't believe their man is a jerk.
You are in worship mode. He will have his fun for a while; hopefully you'll wake up before kids, or you get to the point where this will affect you for the rest of your life. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 4/25/2008 12:42:14 PM | Well...it's been 9 pages and I think we've already established that it is none of her frickin' business because it was in his past and doesn't involve her...other than her violation of his privacy. So, in a nutshell, move on and judge him by what he does now and how he treats you as a person.
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So using your criteria Tick Tock, we should trust sex offenders to be with kids, date people with multiple affairs and partners (with the problem of STD's), and trust all cheaters as long as they haven't done it lately, because we shouldn't look at past behavior?
Wow; sorry, I'm not that stupid or naive. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 4/25/2008 1:37:17 PM | mthomjmark wrote:
"""So using your criteria Tick Tock, we should trust sex offenders to be with kids, date people with multiple affairs and partners (with the problem of STD's), and trust all cheaters as long as they haven't done it lately, because we shouldn't look at past behavior?
Wow; sorry, I'm not that stupid or naive. """""
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I'm with you all the way!!!
Just want to add: I love your posts, but couldn't message to tell you, due to restrictions. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 12:23:52 PM | Guys talk like that about a girl they hooked up with
They don't talk about their girlfriends like that, mainly because they don't want their friends knowing or thinking about their girl that way
So if that was his girlfriend I'd be worried, otherwise not a problem | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 12:35:24 PM | | chances are if he did it to them in the past he will do it to anyone of today. for him to have done that in the first place shows his character. his character is who he is. he cannot change that. if he done that before he met you he will do it after meeting you. its who he is as a person. my theory is if u dont want him to do it to you as well ..dump him. otherwise everyone is gonna know how u are in bed and all your little secrets | |
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austie
| | Joined: 4/16/2008
Msg: 211 | |
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Kyoki
| | Joined: 5/4/2008
Msg: 212 | |
| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:09:57 PM |
YES. Almost all guys talk this way. The ones that dont are usually the shy, socially awkward ones. Simply because they dont have the balls to talk that way.
What an arrogant thing to say. I pretty much lump guys such as you just described as sleaze and choose not to associate with them. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:18:36 PM | YES. Almost all guys talk this way. The ones that dont are usually the shy, socially awkward ones. Simply because they dont have the balls to talk that way.
That has to be the most ridiculous thing i have ever heard in my life. Let me set you straight, The ones who dont are the real gentlemen. the ones who do are the lowlifes. I sure hope your taking notes cause u need all the help u can get. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:25:13 PM | | ^ Let me take it one step further, the ones that do it when they're young are often just being immature and betraying their own insecurity. The ones that do it after they've become grown men are exactly as she described above. The same thing applies to women who do it. They sound like lowlife tramps...you know, the disposable types that are good for one or two uses. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:31:19 PM | Great post, Kittenshere...
chances are if he did it to them in the past he will do it to anyone of today. for him to have done that in the first place shows his character. his character is who he is. he cannot change that. if he done that before he met you he will do it after meeting you. its who he is as a person. my theory is if u dont want him to do it to you as well ..dump him. otherwise everyone is gonna know how u are in bed and all your little secrets
BTW, I'd fall on the same side of this debate if the genders of the people involved were reversed, as well (i.e. if I man was asking this question and it was his girlfriend who had written such intimate details re her sexual exploits to friends in letters/emails).
I think I have to agree with another poster here who said this is not a gender issue (males/females), it's a classy/not classy issue. A person of quality, a gentleman or lady as the case may be, simply does not engage in this type of behavior.
Besides, he's a bit naive to have given away a laptop computer and not realized that anything on it would be accessible to the new owner.
Add this to the "bucks night" and I'd say you have a bigger problem: you may be in relationship with someone who approaches sexuality and sexual experience differently than do you, and his idea of what is and is not appropriate may not be close to what your values are. No one but you can really know this, as we don't know him, or you. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:41:00 PM | | love making/sex is suppose to be a beautiufl thing between two people who love each other.. its not anyone else's business. she has no right to talk about it to anyone and neihter does he. If i was even asked I would tell them it is none of their business. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:45:15 PM |
love making/sex is suppose to be a beautiufl thing between two people who love each other
So that's what I've been doing wrong all these years. Oh well, at least I don't talk about it. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 5/7/2008 1:50:53 PM | | I told my SO that I guess it is time to clean out the old computer from all my pics and emails from let's say other friends haha...he is answer was didn't matter he knows where I sleep and that is the past. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 8/16/2008 3:50:36 PM | Men communicate with men differently than they communicate with the women in their lives.
There is always a price to pay for snooping, which even if you were "just deleting files" you did. He is no different than he was before he left for work. He likes you, he seems to respect you and so what if he is telling his buds how good you are, its a matter of pride for him.
Decide if it's something you can live with, and next time, just do a reformat and you won't have to accidently read old emails. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 9/19/2008 8:56:22 AM | In construction, it's not "normal" for men to talk (or act) like that....
but that's construction....
In management, I've heard men talk about all kinds of things...but it's not "normal" for them to talk (or act) like that either.
It happens, and when it does, "normally" all the guys hearing it get this mild "what a pig" look on their faces, and then talk about football or something as soon as they can change the subject. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 9/19/2008 9:50:18 AM |
Ok, let's be honest here. You are "head over heals" for this guy and aren't going to leave him for any reason, let alone over the advice from some random people on the internet. Someone could give you a recorded conversation of him saying all those things about you to his friends and you would still let it slide. Why? Because you want to believe he is the real deal. He tells you what you want to hear and you believe him regardless. How is anyone here going to change that?
The bottom line is, you are going to ignore red flag after red flag until he does something that even you won't be able to forgive. Sometimes you just have to learn the hard way.
Yuppers Jackal... Great post and good insight!  | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 9/19/2008 10:19:32 AM | The sad reality is that people actually think that it's ok.
I have played a lot of bars in the past couple of years here and there, and the truth of the matter is that even behind the microphone, up on the stage, where the underwear gets slung and the people get loose.....it's really not normal behavior. It's encouraged in that environment, because it's part of the "sex and drugs and rock and roll" counter culture thing....but it's not normal, and people to live that way often wash out or sober up sooner or later. | |
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| Is it just a guy thing or am i being a prude?????
Posted: 9/19/2008 10:23:07 AM | Hmmmm sorry for being so ignorant but.. how come the emails are on his lap top??? mine are not..
If you use Outlook Express does that save on your lap tops because I access all my email accounts online..
I am just curious..
Now as to the content of the emails.. hmmm I think it would bother me too.. because this points to his character.. | |
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