| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 1:19:22 PM | June Cleaver does not work at home anymore, she cant afford it. she goes to school, in some cases is a single mom who works and goes to school. and everything else that goes along with this day and age. I say "FAIR EXCHANGE MEANS NO ROBBERY!" Its the responsibility of both parties to be financially responsible. a man and a woman are two halves that make a whole.
But it is true that Financial stability helps to create stability in the other areas of life. and the guy in the produce department may just have his investments in order. i knew a janitor that ahd thousands when he retired. now he travels the world. i know people that have big careers that cannot afford to do the things he does. people lose their jobs and have things happen to them all the time. i am in school and have been on my job 8 years. but i want better and thats the key not settling for mediocracy. i too grew up bad situation. my mother or foster parents never taught me about debt and finances. i just saw struggle all my life. the key is to find someone that will share your vision.
KEEP YOU HEAD UP FRIEND! | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 1:28:38 PM | If a person is really going to be a partner in the true sense of the work they have to have something to give not just take. Playmate tend to just take, and in time even that gets old. Even if they are single and have a six figure income there is no guarantee that thing will work out.
I have been with some pretty incredible women over the years in long term relationships where finances were commingled and real estate was involved and I found out after living together for a number of years that things would be better if we just went our separate ways.
By not being married we just divvied up the assets and moved on. Now if marriage and kids were involved, it would have been a world of financial hurt for me, the man.
It's always the man with the bucks that gets screwed in the end. Me, I keep it light and see what happens. When you are mobile successful you never really have a hard time finding someone to hang with. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 4:00:22 PM | Definition of soulmate: Soulmate (or soul mate) is a term sometimes used to designate someone with whom one has a feeling of deep and natural affinity, friendship, love, intimacy, sexuality, and/or compatibility.
A soulmate doesn't have to be your romantic partner. They could be your parents; siblings; friends;, etc. By the way, soulmates are HUMANS. Humans do make mistakes.
As far as losing your job, getting your house repo, trust me, that's happening to a whole lot of people in April 2008. A whole lot of middle class folks are one paycheck away from being homeless. I'd say that's financially unfortunate, and yes, their life is somewhat unstable at this point. It doesn't mean that someone isn't worthy of being in love and loving.
On the flip side of the coin, if someone is a gambler and gets their house repo, I'd say they are a financial idiot, and perhaps are better off being alone, than dragging someone down with them. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 4:32:58 PM | I love it, OP....
The whole soulmate thing is such crap.
Today's Soul Mate = Tomorrow's Sole Turd from my experience.
I've been called a SoulMate a couple of times and had both women cheat on me and dump me like so much refuse when the new guy came along. | |
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medana
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Joined: 12/8/2005
Msg: 55 | |
| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 4:37:19 PM | if my 'soulmate' will throw me in more a financial mess than i throw myself in from time to time, then am better sticking to my cats n dog, and off the greyhound station floors, not cosy in winter
separate finances r good. nothing wrong w being compassionate and landing a helping hand to one another, but if it perpetuates, one is better without. plus, for myself, am striving to become more financially responsible and straighten things out. and if am w someone worse than me, than we both going down the drain... lol
now, if he is 20yo, than it's cute :) | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 5:00:07 PM | Contrary to your idea of not wanting a partner who is need, you are delusional.
In a relationship, couples always have needs or is dependent for something. It is whether or not they continue in it.
I am finanacially stable, but owe quite a bit. Mixture of reasons of course. As far as being on this site looking for someone in the midst of my debts, but am not trying too hard, but if I happen to meet someone, she would need to understanding and patient with it as I am working on it.
I do agree with the fact debt does not mix well with relationships most of the time.
I can wait if that is what I need to do. Not a problem for me. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 5:05:33 PM |
You ask, "Are you going to date the guy [gal] that works in the produce department at Walmart since [s]he was 18..." No, probably not. I doubt that person has been to college.
Don't discredit such peoples working in such a profession.
I have a 38 year old friend that has been working at the Lowes since he was 17, he had stock in Lowes (employee benefit) SINCE that time, now he's close to retiring as a millionare (close to being a millionare that is) laughing all the way to the bank...he works in Appliances so he gets "fritzes" (is that the word?) everytime he sells an appliance as well.
He's doing VERY well....esp since Lowes Stock split! | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 5:14:28 PM | | i dont care about someones finances. If you truly LOVE someone then it shouldnt matter, should it?! ... heck, I could be stranded on a deserted island with my soulmate and i would be happy as a lark... I am NOT materialistic! | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 5:28:53 PM | [/Sooo glad I am not the only person who thinks this. When I say this, I am accused of being a snob and an elitist.
I am sorry, but over the years a man who sits on the sofa drinking Mickey's Big Mouth Beer and watching Nascar is not going to jive well with my job, opera reviewing... The fact I am back in school after getting two BA's in the arts to pursue a science degree, or my "let's go to the museum" outings with the kidnicks. We are going to truly piss each other off in the long run. What in God's name would we talk about for the next 20 or so years? There needs to be some common ground. I don't care if he looks like Brad Pitt, if he sounds like Larry the Cable guy, it's not going to happen.
I think the whole soul mate thing is overrated. I think common interests in some areas, similar education, spiritual and cultural experience are the best matches. Throw in a pinch of good communication skills and a little patience, and that is what you can put up with for a lifetime.]
Well said | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 6:21:48 PM | Maybe I have a bad attitude, but I have a hard time not cringing over the notion of "soulmate."
If there is such a thing, I can't imagine how it would have ANYTHING to do with finances. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 6:35:20 PM | Originally I was born with four arms, four legs, and a single head made of two faces, but Zeus feared my power and split me in half, condemning me to spend my life searching for the other half to complete me...so anyhoo time is running out I might have to get with him next time around.
As far as financially stable goes, I don't care what he has as long as he doesn't expect me to bankroll his beer habit. Crap I would even set my sights on a teacher...and you know they don't make nuttin'  | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 6:49:12 PM |
Crap I would even set my sights on a teacher...and you know they don't make nuttin'
Not only don't they make nuttin', they don't know nuttin' either and I don't know that fer a fac'.....
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 6:53:29 PM | Financial stability doesn't have to be as complicated as all of this.
There are a LOT of people in this country that try to live under the illusion that they have more money than they really do. Debt is a HUGE problem if you don't know how to properly manage it. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 7:11:47 PM | Not looking for my soulmate.
Did the Romeo and Juliette thing.... got kicked out of my family home and considered 'dead' to them when I fell for Romeo.
Did the 'Titanic' thing with Romeo....it almost killed me.
Romeo drove us to bankruptcy 3 times and I stuck with him...I took the vows seriously.... no more...could not take selfish, self-centered Romeo.... left.
Paid him off....and left.
it was more a Rocky Horror Picture Show thing happenin.... or Frankenstein... I take some responsibilty to creating this monster. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 7:13:38 PM | I would settle for mentally and emotionally stable over financial.
As I am stable (ha!!)...I do show marvelous resistance .. if they do manage to get me tipped over I always return to my upright position after having been heeled.
Oh and I don't have squat so soul-mate will have to bankroll my beer habit..lucky him I don't drink much...beer that is | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 7:22:06 PM | Guess it depends on the people involved.
I know for myself that the person I would be mature, be able to hold a job and keep a roof over their head (rented or owned).
If you work hard at saving for a while, your life can be more comfortable and lower stress. I like being able to buy things now when ever I like and not worry about how to pay for it. If you don't have your finances in order, your don't own your possessions- they own you. And the banks, credit card companies and pay day check cashing companies own you too. I like my freedom to much now. Everything I have including the small house and truck are paid for. If times got tough now I could live on less and still be able to live.
I live within my means and would expect my "soul mate" or whatever to do so as well. Money doesn't buy happiness- but having one less thing to worry about can help. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 7:23:24 PM | If a man my age isn't financially stable I wouldn't choose to get involved with him. I understand that we're in a recession, understand that things happen in life not in our control. If I were already with a man suffering through any of this I wouldn't leave him. But to get involved with someone knowing their life was financially unstable? No thanks. Not looking for more problems. Not looking to take care of anyone.
I don't understand people with major financial, emotional problems being on a dating site looking for their "soul mate". First priority, get your life in order. Not fair to expect someone new to deal with your existing problems. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 8:10:31 PM | So now the label of financially stable has been added to soul mate? Seems like we're bordering on the commercialism of Christmas. Isn't that what sites like SugarDaddy.com are about? The ideal is finding our "soul" mate, yet there seems to be a movement to apply the "checklist". Just my opinion, soul mates are meant to allow us to grow, in good times and bad. When you share more and your life is better for having loved with abandon, can you apply a price, or is it priceless?
And if all else fails, I like the idea of sharing shoes! | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 8:20:54 PM | There is a difference between someone that has experienced some financial difficulty due to a set of circumstances he may have had little control over and someone that has chronic money problems because he is irresponsible, spends beyond his means, can't hold a job or many other reasons that will destroy an otherwise healthy relationship over time.
I don't think there are soulmates. I think there are some people we have an extraordinary connection with but I do not think there is one person that we are suited to and no one else. Some of us live in the real world where we have to pay bills and take care of our children so hooking up with another mouth to feed is not my idea of mated souls. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 8:42:44 PM | Renee Descarte was the father of philisophical dualism which stated that the soul resides in the body and the body is the vessel for the soul.
Now try to understand this before refuting the statment . The soul and the body are seperate, when the body dies the soul moves on to a different place (the christians would say heaven) but the body is gone, it rots.
Now the concept of the SOUL MATE is more of a Buddhist theory (its fact to them) but the complete theory is that we all have a mate that our souls were united with before we were born into our earthly bodies. Sometimes our soulmate is on the earth the same time we are and they believe the soulmate can be located with discipline and by seaking them out. Your soulmate may be in a differnt state or even country, the soul mate may not even be on the earth at any given time but the soul exists therefore your soulmate existes, someplace.
Things of the body are IRRELEVANT to the soulmate because you will in fact be reunited with them at some point when your earthly journeys are concluded or you are between journeys. Finances are irrelevant to the soulmate because you certainly dont take any of that into the after life, heaven or whatever term you care to use and if you dont find your soulmate during the present life cycle of your current body your soul will find them in the spiritual realm but you always have a sense of something missing, a part of you, and that missing piece is your soulmate, so to seek them out in the earthly life and find them would take away that sense of something missing, you would feel complete again if you found them.
There is a movie about this, siddhartha, I believe, but it is based on a work of literature and it is required reading in many colleges and universaties. It is also based on Buddhist teachings, so NO its not merly a work of fiction.
I want to digress here for a minute to clarify Romeo and Juliet. This was much more than a movie, it was a work of literature by a world recognized master William Shakspear. Now writtings are NOT considered literature unless there is some underlying truth to be learned from them, so to discount Romeo and Juliet as being nothing more than "fiction" that is an uneducated statment. The fact is Romeo and Juliet is a tragedy, they were denied love, they only found it for a brief time and it cost them both their lives. Kind of similiar to the majority of people on this website, its seems every one of us on here found love for a brief time and lost it and that is pretty much what Romeo and Juliet is about.
Most people described marriage as a partnership of equals and maybe in this earthly game if your interested only in survival of your body and dont care about spiritual things or matters pertaining to the soul, then that would be the correct approach but to a buddhist the soul has much more significance than the body and their earthly lives are devoted to matters of the soul. | |
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| what if your soul mate is NOT financial stable
Posted: 4/7/2008 8:43:16 PM | | I suppose having my own money has opened me up to less fortunate mates. I can base my decisions purely on love and not finanical stability. My decision not to re-marry also allows me to spread my net wider. Because after all, modern day marriages are little more than business agreements. If I were looking for a business partner then I would of course be searching for the best financial candidate that would be worth my investment and add to my portfolio. Instead I have just found an ubundance of love. | |
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