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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 4:38:43 PM | Not to be too picky here, but I had a hard time reading your profile. It is two paragraphs of run-on sentences.
It is a bit of a no no , since one of those sentences in your profile says
"please understand the concept of periods and capitalization in your sentences ". You do not use much of either in yours.
But, on the upside, your picture is fabulous! Wish I looked that good!! | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 4:40:10 PM | OP ~ I understand your vent!
I'm not fond of "those" messages either, and while I TRY to give the impression in my profile that I prefer more articulate men, I haven't gone to the extent of STATING that I won't reply to such vague invitations.
For the record, I have a TON of fine print, even more than you do, OP, and there's not much MORE annoying than someone asking "what I like to do" before they've told me anything about themselves (and it doesn't list SQUAT in their profile, BTW).
Anyone within your preferences can message you, darlin'...the best you can do is hit "Delete", remember the name, & give 'em the ol' "Unread/Deleted".
Happy Fishing! | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 4:41:32 PM | well I have revised my profile several times. Where it was straight and to the point of what I was looking for and then was told by several women to liven it up some and then told by another it was not long enough and then told by another it was too long, at least it looks like it was being read for all the good it does me. I had two women last week respond to my profile but when I emailed them back I heard nothing back at all. Oh well doesn't seem like I can win for losing or whatever.
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 4:45:24 PM | Well, thanks....pics never turn out the way you want them to...had to take like ten then pick the least scary.
Well, the consensus is that I am commiting cardinal sin with my run on sentences in my profile....didn't think they were particularly run on since there are commas....however, I digress. I shall do a little rewrite. Feel free to critique (but I could get sh*t for saying that since this is not the Profile Review section...yes, NOT the Profile Review section....how ironic, or something) But I shall take the advice given a do a little tweeking.
I still stand by my point though. If you want someone to respond favourly to your email, give them something to work with. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 6:46:22 PM |
I still stand by my point though. If you want someone to respond favourly to your email, give them something to work with.
Agreed | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:03:58 PM | | Sorry hun but it just seems that this is the way it is here. Most men will never read a word of your proifle and only look at your pictures. When i was looking and didn't have my profile hidden i would get tons of "how ru", "hey baby" , "wats up" , wanna chat". It's just something you have to put up with here. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:10:40 PM | I will take "wanna chat" anyday to "Do you like sex? I am horny!"
Some guys claim to not read profiles. But they do! They just do not wish to understand them. Oh wait, there are some girls too who may completely ignore what you said and approach you as well, making you wonder where you made a come on statement after stating you are looking for a man. 
Really, this is an online site. Don't you want to chat first to know if you even want to meet? I do not see anything wrong with chatting if they are good conversationalists.
I will take an articulate man to a model-type photo who can't carry a conversation. ;) | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:24:57 PM | burleybabe writes in msg 30
I still stand by my point though. If you want someone to respond favourly to your email, give them something to work with.
That applies at every step. In your case, your profile might get something better than "wanna chat" if you gave the men something to work with. I don't know if you have done your updates yet, but what I see is just a wish list for your guy. Very little about you or why a guy would want to get to know you. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:25:05 PM | I have always found it interesting meeting people from the internet. It's like rolling the dice every time because you never really know what your going to get. Just because someone doesn't read your profile I wouldn't take it personally. I have found that people are rarely who they portray themselves to be in their writing anyways. Although sometimes you are pleasantly surprised by the outcome.  | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:28:40 PM | I'm not necessary endorsing the "wanna chat" emails, but here a few reasons why some men write these emails.
1. Many men have spent a lot of time and energy writing well thought emails to have them be read/deleted. That can be become frustuating after a while.
2. Some women's profiles are very generic and reveals little info about themselves. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:35:50 PM | ^^^agreed. My beef is more with the ensuing emails after the first one. I'm always left holding up the convo. Very tiring. Ask a question each and every time. Pretty much every contact I have had on here, I have had to continue the convo. Men want a woman that communicates? Well, I want a man who communicates too. I give the men who send me lame emails a chance, understanding your first point, but it always ends up with endless "no effort" emails.
It doesn't need to be well thought out. It need only contain ONE QUESTION. That gives someone a REASON to answer. This is simple advice for both men and women.
Simple.
I do not read/delete and my profile was NOT generic. I had enough weird things in my interests for someone to ask "what is that?"
I CAN EXPECT WHAT I CAN OFFER.
Edit: Oh and sometimes those emails that are "wanna chat" might be an IM. Hence the reason I sometimes respond. I went offline and didn't catch the IM, so it went to email. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:46:56 PM | Perhaps, a 'Wanna chat' email would get you to, at least, look at their
very wordy profile? It tells you that they are interested in you, and you
can then figure out if you are interested in them by checking out their
profile. Requiring such a lengthly first message prob just makes you
miss out on a few potential good catches | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:54:49 PM | Breaking story - men spam women with useless one-liners, without treating them as real people and trying to figure out what they want.
And on our next week's all-important exclusive - investigation reveals that there are men who use crude come-ons to attempt to get women to have NSA sex with them.
That's funny, thanks. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:01:27 PM | Perhaps they are asking wanna chat , because you specifically asked them not to!
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:01:58 PM | OP, the reason you bother is because the men you are interested in WILL read your profile and WON'T send such a generic first-contact message. Meantime you just wade through the rest and say no thanks or ignore what doesn't work for you.
Or you could start a thread about it and see if that changes anything for the better.
--Ms. Flis | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:19:21 PM | ==Perhaps they are asking wanna chat , because you specifically asked them not to!
I agree, people like to do things they are not supposed to do!
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:31:24 PM | | Not that I've ever asked anyone to chat (still rookie-ish around here), but I have noticed that I can put tons of effort (OK 5 minutes-worth) into a long, witty (hopefully), well-thought-out (again, hopefully) and reflective email only to not get ANY sort of reply...I would have imagined common courtesy would have at least dictated a "Thanks but no thanks" response. So after 10-15 no replys, my next email is going to be a one-liner... | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:34:32 PM | ^^^ Nothing wrong with a one-liner--just make it a well-thought-out, witty one!
--Ms. Flis | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:36:18 PM | There are those of us that actually take time to read the profile and when writing, write about something in it.
It really bothers me when someone just says. "I don't like to write, if you want to know something, just ask"
Well how do I know if there is enough there to make me want to ask. While there has to be some sort of physical attraction. That is NEVER enough on it's own.
Please OP, hold tight and hang in there. There are men like me that will write. Just give it a chance.
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:39:59 PM |
There are those of us that actually take time to read the profile and when writing, write about something in it.
speaks for me too. i always try to write about the interests the girl has in her profile, especially if they are similar to mine, it works as a good starting point.
i agree with the let's chat deal, but i will usually respond with something meaningful. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:32:10 PM | The following is what the modern/computer age definition of "Chat" is:
Type of text based communication that is live, or real-time. You can talk to the person and they can receive the message and respond in a matter of seconds. This is different from other text based communications such as e-mail where it could be a couple of hour, days, or weeks to receive a response.
If you're looking for places on the Internet to chat about almost anything MSN Chat and Yahoo! Chat are two good starting locations for chatting over an Internet web page. There are also several million users chatting through other networks such as IRC.
So when someone emails on here, want to chat, usually they do mean to IM. | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:49:58 PM |
burnleybabe wrote:
Why, why, why do I bother putting anything in my profile? Guys
don't read it! It clearly says not to email me saying "wanna chat?"
or other mindless natter like that because I won't respond.
I think I hear what you're saying. For all the folks I've ever e-mailed
on POF, I'm pretty sure I've never once just written "wanna chat?"
And why? Because if I was in their shoes, I'd prefer someone who
approached me already starting a conversation, and with something
a bit more to "bite into" than just a simple yes/no question.
If nothing else, if we sincerely want to chat with someone, we can always
begin a conversation by making some comment about something we've
read in their profile. That, at the very least, gets the ball of conversation
rolling, and in a manner that's more likely to meet with success than
simply writing "wanna chat?"
Apolinary | |
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| Profiles - why bother?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:56:21 PM | | Because 90% of people don't answer so it's devolved down to "wanna chat" | |
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