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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:45:29 PM | | Nope. Sorry. Once you've had sex with more than one person, you realize that there are significant differences between good and bad sex. I'm not going to wait until I've entered into a legally binding contract to find out if my new partner and I can satisfy each other. Would you wait to marriage to find out if a guy could resolve a conflict with you? You know, just so that first fight would be extra special? | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 7:49:53 PM | I'm not willing to wait. I AM waiting. It causes too much shit and I don't want to bother with it. I'm more interested in a strong foundation for a relationship and that can be like the giant beacon on top of a skyscraper or something. No sense in trying to build on top of it, it waits until everything else is settled.
I'm not 'wanting' it so getting married won't be rushed because of it. It'll happen when it does. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 8:38:30 PM | If someone can do that, then more power to them. That's their choice.
But personally, I view that as a big mistake. When you marry somebody, you're entering into what's supposed to be a lifelong union with them. I don't know about anybody else, but if I'm going to be tied to somebody for the rest of my life, I want to make sure we're compatible in every sense of the word.
You'd never buy an expensive new car without at least test driving it first to make sure it was what you wanted and met all your expectations. Just the same, I'd never roll the dice on making a lifelong commitment to somebody that might potentially be horribly incompatible with me in the bedroom.
The same way I'd never marry somebody without living with them first to make sure I could tolerate all of the little things. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:23:08 PM | | It usually is a matter of Faith, and religion. Apart from God, they are right, it does not make sense. So sticking to the moral ground, it would have to be a personal decision on both parties. It's still possible even if both parties are not virgins...its just harder because once you have had sex, its harder to say no. If one party wants to wait while the other does not, well then they are NOT right for each other. They have different values and goals, and the one who does not want to wait will end up pressuring the one that wants to wait to compromise his/her current values to his/her own. It's all a personal choice, and you all answered accordingly for your selves. But there are people out there that have waited, and have great, life long relationship that are very strong, and rock solid. You can especially see this fact because it was more common back in the day, especially around religious groups. I will give you that yes, people still had sex before marriage and that the majority did wait, I can't make that claim, but it did happen and good relationships were a result. Infact it was expected more then not back then. It does make me wonder why we had less divorces back then...but imo that can leads to talk about how womens rights were very different back then, which is a very true and viable factor. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:38:03 PM |
let's say you meet the right girl and she wants to wait until marriage to have sex,
While a noble idea to wait for marriage,
how does a couple check for sexual compatability
prior to marriage, without having sex?
Bad sex is worse than no sex.
And if you are willing, does that mean you'll propose sooner than you would have ever thought just because of that reason?
If the marriage will happen within the week, I might
be tempted to wait. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:42:24 PM | The "right girl" won't be dogmatic. I will wait til she's wet, I have a boner and we feel good, and reason/think it's a good time. No sooner, no later.
If this thread sucks, see the other ones on this topic.
But to answer your question. Many won't wait.... Some very few will.
I live in a world where the religious tell me to wait to have sex til a ritual, meanwhile the preachers that preach it try and fuk little boys.... Think I'll listen to the nature within, rather than the ego of old.
Every animal who's mated, is going to hell..... They've never been married in a church after all. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:54:33 PM | Hi ddist,
Q: Is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
A: If I met the right woman and she wants to wait until marriage to have sex I would definitely wait. O:)
Wishing you the best -appreciate the post!
O:)  | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 9:57:26 PM | I'm 57 and not likely to get married again. That isn't to say I'm giving up on women or sex; but I would have to hear a really compelling argument for getting married again, and an even more compelling argument for being celibate until after the ceremony; further, I'd have to hear a really outstanding reason for having more children.
I've lived a decent life, and I've never acted maliciously toward anyone who didn't have it coming. I'm a compassionate, empathetic person, try to treat others with appropriate respect, and I expect the same from others.
Sex is, to me, another enjoyable aspect of interpersonal relationships, and something I expect to be a part of a long-term romantic relationship; I can be "just friends" with a woman (friendship with no sex), but it's not likely to ever lead to marriage. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 10:05:56 PM |
I live in a world where the religious tell me to wait to have sex til a ritual, meanwhile the preachers that preach it try and fuk little boys....
As for the original question...
Honestly, I'm just wondering, let's say you meet the right girl and she wants to wait until marriage to have sex, will you be willing to wait?
I would; anticipation after all, is everything.
Cheers! | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 10:12:57 PM |
Honestly, I'm just wondering, let's say you meet the right girl and she wants to wait until marriage to have sex, will you be willing to wait? ............................. I appreciate honesty. And if you are willing, does that mean you'll propose sooner than you would have ever thought just because of that reason?
A girl that insists that I wait until marriage is not "the right girl." Not in my case anyway. Sexual relations are just as important in my relationships as emotional and intellectual connection. | |
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ddist
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Joined: 3/31/2008
Msg: 39 | |
| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 10:36:28 PM | It usually is a matter of Faith, and religion. Apart from God, they are right, it does not make sense.
I completely agree with that statement.. It is a personal opinion, many of you think that if you test it, that would be the base for your decision wether to continue that relationship..
No, I'm not a virgin, and yes, I do have a kid, I have learned a lot over the years, and have made a conscious decision to wait until marriage.
If after marriage, the sex is not that great, that's why communication is important, we adapt, learn, listen to one another, and I'm positive that it will improve. Sex can improve.
If I am in love with that person for who they are, nothing is impossible.. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 10:40:01 PM |
If after marriage, the sex is not that great, that's why communication is important, we adapt, learn, listen to one another, and I'm positive that it will improve. Sex can improve.
If I am in love with that person for who they are, nothing is impossible..
Which is exactly why someone that ranks its importance up near the top won't be a person that this will work with. I think the same way about it. I don't see how it would be so awful if both people really feel that way about each other and actually want to work through difficulties. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 11:09:09 PM | I suppose I could wait for the right person, but don't think I wont be sneaking a peek while your having an afternoon nap, just to see that everything is in the right place. Is heavy petting allowed?  | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 11:15:14 PM |
No, I'm not a virgin, and yes, I do have a kid, I have learned a lot over the years, and have made a conscious decision to wait until marriage.
Okay, I'll bite. Why did you make that decision? | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/8/2008 11:18:33 PM | The likeliness that a girl is the right one for me that wants to wait for a ceremony and a piece of paper made by other people in order to participate something that could very well affect the rest of our lives wouldn't be my type anyway.
There is no way I wouldn't notice the some brainwashed sheep bowing to some imaginary figure in the sky past the first few dates so sexuality would never enter the equation before I ditch the chick. | |
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ddist
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Joined: 3/31/2008
Msg: 44 | |
| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/9/2008 12:00:21 AM | Why did I make that decision? Simple fact that you get to know that person for who they truly are and not base your feelings on just how good or bad they are in bed.
Plus... a big part, is that i'm a born again Christian, (some people might not understand the full extent of the meaning) and that's the right thing to do..
In the past, when I did end up having sex with a guy, I completely lose interest in him..
it's kinda funny, usually it's the other way around.. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/9/2008 12:28:50 AM |
Simple fact that you get to know that person for who they truly are and not base your feelings on just how good or bad they are in bed.
You don't find how someone behaves sexually to reveal a part of their personality? For me, that's always been the key issue. Add to the fact that I'm also a horn dog.
Btw, not to go around picking a fight, but I have to ask: if you weren't a born again Christian, would you feel the same way?
In the past, when I did end up having sex with a guy, I completely lose interest in him..
Begs the question: why? | |
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ddist
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Joined: 3/31/2008
Msg: 46 | |
| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/9/2008 12:31:53 AM | | Yes, I would, I was raised that way but truly understood the importance of it later in life.. Why? I lose interest because I know, what I did is wrong, I felt guilty, therefore, am not interested in seeing that guy again.. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/9/2008 5:16:06 AM | | Because to a Christian, the way the person behaves sexually is not anywhere as near important as how they behave in other areas of there life. To a Christian, it's not about pleasing yourself, and getting what you want, it's about God's WILL attested through the bible. Lots of Christians actually end up staying single because of this. You can scoff at it all you want, but its a belief they feel so strongly about, that most are willing to die for. Are you willing to die for the sex? prolly not..... | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/9/2008 5:28:05 AM | | Now that I'm a bit older, it wouldn't bother me too much if a partner wanted to wait until marriage. Nothing to do with religion or respect - it just doesn't bother me any more. I'm more interested in having her arms around me when I wake up in the morning than what positions we did the night before. | |
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| is anyone here willing to wait until marriage?
Posted: 4/9/2008 5:42:11 AM | | I would wait for her.I think it would be very healthy for a marriage and a relationship if you were her first.I don't think I would propose sooner,but then again,maby I would. | |
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