| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/12/2008 9:09:42 PM | Here in Canada the legal age of consent is 14, but the conservatives are trying to raise it to 16. Interesting fact that 12 is the very minimum age of consent, only so long as the other person is no more than 2 years older 
It's interesting the comments ("If she was my daughter, I would...") from the parents that it's unacceptable at 17, but fine at 18. In this case, there's 2 months until the "safe line" has been crossed. How much maturity is this girl going to develop in those next two months? Will it matter?
I recently dated someone who was 19 (turned 20 in January). The major stumbling block in that case was her issues, but not any age gap factor. Would I have at your age dated someone her age? Maybe, although I do recall I had a +/- 5 year range at that time. 19 being the psychological barrier that with someone younger, people look at you differently, while older it doesn't matter. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/12/2008 11:04:49 PM | | While I personally find the gap a bit creepy at this stage in her life, my real question is this: why on earth did you post a topic asking people how they'd feel about this, when it's readily apparent that you aren't ready to handle the kind of heat this is bringing onto you? | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 1:25:36 AM | | the age of legality is something that differs from state to state, and its really hard for people to really have an opinion on that isn't based on pure moral/ethical values, none of which have anything to do with the law, or the actual morals or ethics involved. 17 is a year away from 18, and 18 is old enough to die for your country, so how young exactly is 17? its one year away from voting, buying cigarettes, and owning debt. yet its still young? one year? seriously. i can understand a 14 year old with an 18 year old, or a 15 year old and a 20 year old, but a 17 year old and a 24 year old? something about bashing it with some animosity just seems kind of immature in itself. there's worse things in the world than an older boyfriend, even at 17... its all about how you treat the person with your with. if you treat them right, and the ages are within the law, you're really doing nothing wrong. whether or not people agree..... not too long ago, interracial couples took a lot heat. that didn't make them wrong, regardless of "morals" and "ethics". | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 1:34:53 AM | Very well put wowsad esp about the interracial dating as a i.e. for what was morally wrong at one time. I totally agree with you on your entire post. I mean like you said if it was a 15 with a 20 it would be wrong but 17 omg why not.......also its legal in the op's state like he said in a latter post so no worries there. So I really don't see a problem with the whole situation.
I mean who cares age is only a number. Go for it.
Best of luck to everyone | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 1:40:40 AM | In the eyes of British Law (mindfull of this is world wide) the Protection of Vulnerable Children's Act.
QUOTE:
It states: a child is a child until the age of 18, unless they are married with parental permission at a younger age.
UNQUOTE:
So there is your answer: if she is under 18 she is in the eyes of british law a child, therefore, vulnerable.
______________________________________________________________
Yes I know English law is all over the place: cos they can die for their country as a child, have babies as a child, they can drive, own their own homes, work, and do almost anything BUT if you as an adult over the age of 18 effect that child of under 18 you have broken British Law.
WHO SAID THE LAW IS AN ASS? | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 2:01:49 AM | There's nothing wrong with going out with a 17 year old. 6 years is nothing. It's not like you're old enough to be her dad...
If it's legal and her and her parents are cool with it, then I say go for it. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 2:21:58 AM | When I was 23 I lived with a 16 yo. This was in NZ where the age of consent was 16.
For various reasons at that point in time I was more naive than she was despite the fact I was 7 years her senior.
It did'nt last and I was heartbroken when she ended it.
The point being that sometimes it's irrelevant what the age difference is when both of you are still growing physically and emotionally.
Remember the older you are the more the difference in age dissapears. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 2:31:05 AM | | I think its strange at 24 you have something in common with a 17 year old whose in high school . Personally its kinda creepy what about her prom you going to be the creepy older guy at prom with high school kids ? To me until someone has gotten out of school and lived a tad bit and seen the world its a matter of things don't work out when one person is out thee and th e other is not .. as far as people posting its legal or not .. thats another issue that always gets me we had to make it a law to tell people not to touch teens rather sad really .. it should be well they are a teen so I am an adult so i need to leave them alone . | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:09:09 AM | "Just shows how much you trust your daughter. If you haven't raised her to respect herself and have morals and not allow herself to be taken advantage of by a man, of ANY age, then YOU have failed. Not the guy you'd go beat up."
Oh Selenanj, how naive is that? To expect a 17 year old of either sex to always make the right deciscion and do the right thing is to burry your head in the sand. Why do you think these sicko pervs prey on them in the first place? The parent who says "my child would never do that'', is the parent you see sobbing on TV wondering why their child was victimized.
In this case we are talking about a girl that would have still been a 5th grader when this guy graduated high school. She is now 17 and thinks she knows it all [we all do at that age] and he's in his mid twenties and obviously girls in his age group won't have anything to do with him. he finds a young girl who is ready to "throw off the chains of parental control". He convinces her she is so much more mature than her parents give her credit for, but he views her as a "real woman". What do you think is going to happen here? | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:19:49 AM | | not that big of a gap...BUT...she's young and she's still growing, dispite this "maturity" taht she has. this one guy i know was 18 and he started dating a girl who's 15. they're cute and all. they hooked up from church,and they're friends of the family. now, she's 21, she just broke up with him because she doesn't know what she wants. she's curious as to exploring others. he's left broken hearted, confused, and still inlove with her...but what does he do now? she wants freedom. you wanna go through that? | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 3:35:07 PM |
Just shows how much you trust your daughter. If you haven't raised her to respect herself and have morals and not allow herself to be taken advantage of by a man, of ANY age, then YOU have failed. Not the guy you'd go beat up.
Typical response... Trusting my daughter is NOT the issue here, but rather a "Adult" man trying to hook up with a teenaged girl.
And to be honest with you, if more fathers were in the picture and if fathers drew the line... there might be less preganant teens having fatherless children. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 4:13:36 PM | | think that is pushing the limits of whats exceptable . well its not illegal its sort of borderline approiate depending on what you plan on doing with her . it might be better idea to stick to girls closer to your age . | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 4:19:05 PM | FlyBeta,
Where you at? The date was last night mayne... cough it up. Tell us how it went! Does Indigo need to dig out her shells or what?
Where's the gun-toting smilie when you need one?  | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:36:29 PM | good grief.
A 17 yr old is NOT a child. Nor are they "illegal".
Who said he wanted to sleep with her?
If he did, so what? Birds of a feather flock together...he most likely is either immature, or she is very mature.
Why would she be safer dating a 17 yr old guy? Like they don't want sex? Possibly Mr. 24 year old is better able to handle his sexualty...at the very least he is more likely to be protected. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:49:19 PM | Seriously, you're not only not making a good decision for yourself but this poor little girl is only 17. Thre prime age for falling fast and the hardest brea- ups ever. Not only might you get her grounded (which at 17 is the end of her life ask her) but you might risk her falling for you and you want nothing more than a moive date. This place is called plenty of fish, find another and spare the child some agony. I think you judt wanted props for this thread like you've accomplised something when really all you've done is push girls your age away. Let her grow up, let her have her prom, her senior all nighter, her senior trip, her search for college. Don't take away her adolsence. Havn't you any younger girl family members? Would you aprove if it were opposite? Try to think about someone other than yourself, it's refreshing. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/13/2008 11:10:09 PM |
the age of legality is something that differs from state to state, and its really hard for people to really have an opinion on that isn't based on pure moral/ethical values, none of which have anything to do with the law, or the actual morals or ethics involved. 17 is a year away from 18, and 18 is old enough to die for your country, so how young exactly is 17? its one year away from voting, buying cigarettes, and owning debt. yet its still young? one year? seriously. i can understand a 14 year old with an 18 year old, or a 15 year old and a 20 year old, but a 17 year old and a 24 year old? something about bashing it with some animosity just seems kind of immature in itself. there's worse things in the world than an older boyfriend, even at 17...
As far as minor and adult, 17 and 19 I can understand. 17 and 24, no. A 24 year old should be a world apart from a 17 year old high schooler. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 9:41:04 AM | What are you looking for, from her (you mention a worry of naivety)?
Is she really old enough to offer it?
If you aren't having sex, is it really a date?
If you had a little sister her age, how would you feel?
Chances are, if you have to ask...you do already know the answer. If YOU don't feel comfortable about it, that's sure to be obvious, and maybe transfer over. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 10:27:30 AM | shes not even drinking age yet dude!!! why you wasting your time with her??? at least find someone legal drinking age not a kid | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 10:40:50 AM | | I don't think a 24 year old, male or female, should be dating a live-with-parents teenager, female or male. Regardless of what any is stating in any local, state, provincial, or national "consent" law. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 10:46:13 AM | | flybeta: Nothing has to happen, as she has to do is say it did, why put yourself in any kind of questionable position. Don't be a stupid, date someone legal for gods sake! | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 10:46:24 AM | OP doesn't sound like any big deal to me. Think about it, when you're 35 and she's 27 or 8, it won't make any difference .......that is if by any chance you two end up really hitting it off....  | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 11:01:59 AM | I think the OP will probably just do what he wants anyways.
And its not like your life starts after you turn 18.
Can you really say that no one touches a cigarette, a beer, goes to a party, or has sex before they turn 18? I think its a little ridiculous.
If he wants to be on the safe side, no sex until she is 18.
JMHO. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 12:26:32 PM | LoL, I had to laugh at this thread. Where were all you people that seem to think that the OP should stick to people more his age when there are threads here about old women dating young men or vica versa with age differences of twenty to thirty years?
Don't give me that, its as long as she's legal crap or they are two consenting adults crap. In actuality there is no difference at all in maturity between a 17 year old and an 18 year old. A birthday does not make one more mature, only older. For that matter a 17 year old is usually not that much more mature at 21. Do we remember what happens in college?
The OP sounds like a responsible person, he is even taking the time to ask for advice on the matter. If he is that responsible perhaps he should wait a few months and let her turn 18, but in reality is it really going to make that much difference? We don't hand out maturity guide books at 18, lock them in a room and make sure they read it. If she were my daughter and he took the time to come and talk to me and let me get to know him I would probably let them. By the way, my daughter just turned 20. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 1:08:57 PM | QUOTE: Don't give me that, its as long as she's legal crap or they are two consenting adults crap. In actuality there is no difference at all in maturity between a 17 year old and an 18 year old. A birthday does not make one more mature, only older. For that matter a 17 year old is usually not that much more mature at 21. Do we remember what happens in college?
>>> >Well put sir. I agree. Even with adult films for instance, a lot of times producers seek out (and pay well for) girls who are only say a couple months past their 18th bday. Because they want to advertise it that way. So, say they get a legit one, one or two months past her 18th bday. They film it. It's perfectly legal and she gets paid and everyone goes their merry way. Whereas a mere six weeks prior the guy would have been accused of something like making "kiddie porn". What the hell had changed about her in that amount of time??? Something is either wrong with the ages of majority we have here, or the general definitions of things, or something.. | |
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| 24m goin on date with 17f
Posted: 4/14/2008 2:34:30 PM | | It's not illegal to date... just don't have sex. I just can't see a 17 and 24 year old having anything in common. | |
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