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 Reggyboy
Joined: 3/19/2008
Msg: 26
Talking about sex before even meetingPage 2 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
A relationship is the price a man has to pay for sex..

Sex is the price a woman has to pay for a relationship!!

Anyway, it would be nice for the ladies to think about impressing us gents a bit, some of us are a bit choosey, indeed, when it comes to it, sex is hardly the most interesting of topics, better practiced than talked about and the way women offer themselves, its hardly a currency of much value!!

So, any ladies want to talk about your culinary skills? What about your abilities to clean the house and serve master? These are the REAL important matters! Sex, well, that can be taken for granted these days!!

Lots of women are are happy to talk about sex, but having said that, looking at their pics and profiles, its hard to imagine why any man would want to when there are perfectly decent prostitutes out there on the streets who are much better looking and much more honest!!
 Reggyboy
Joined: 3/19/2008
Msg: 27
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/14/2008 7:26:13 PM



Let me tell you something Reg...there is nothing more uncomfortable then meeting somebody you've had sexual conversations with, only to find out that you have NO chemistry whatsoever.


Indeed, to be honest, having sexual conversations with women from here and seeing them on cam is likely to be the best way of ensuring you DONT meet them!!
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 28
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/14/2008 7:28:48 PM

A relationship is the price a man has to pay for sex..

Sex is the price a woman has to pay for a relationship!!


God... I think I'd rather die than buy into either of those theories. Or the rest of the attitude.


ROTFL. Again, yes and no.... keeping in mind that if someone is here
for just sex and meets up with someone else who is here for just sex,
then talking about this stuff and not much else might be the perfect
comfort level for both of them.


The OP didn't describe such a scenario. If we're talking strictly about the IE set, then of course they're gonna talk about sex before meeting. Duh.

I should think it's obvious who would and wouldn't be talking about sex based on what their profile says they're here for.
 Gypsycookie
Joined: 2/25/2008
Msg: 29
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/14/2008 9:11:37 PM
LOL at the God Forbid wording. When will men realize there is a time and place for sex talk and its not the first few times chatting with a woman. Flirting is one thing but actually being blantent a bout it is a whole other thing.
Flirting is healthy.
However its rude to discuss intimate details with someone you may never meet let alone click with after meeting
 Unlike Dorothy
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 30
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/14/2008 9:32:18 PM

Low sex drive, high sex drive, prudish ideals, heavy bdsm wants.

I think its best to sort those basic thing out before you go off for a meet !


Sure if you are meeting to have sex! But if you are going on a first date, that's kinda putting the cart before the horse don't ya think??? Plus, if you talk about sex with someone you've never met but plan to go on a date with, talking about it will change the shape of things. They're not going to be thinking about dating you, but having sex with you. Now I know what you are going to say next...as in "What's wrong with that??!!" ...Absolutely nothing if you are hooking up for an intimate enounter and absoultely everything if you're thinking about dating/long term!!!

 PeterC
Joined: 3/6/2008
Msg: 31
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 12:19:28 AM
No way I dont agree, Im not talkin IE's, Your looking to invest in a new car, it helps if you know what your getting.
 NorseViking869
Joined: 3/23/2006
Msg: 32
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 12:32:21 AM
I say it depends on how long it takes before you meet someone and how comfortable you and the person chatting are. I mean it is one thing for a man or even a woman to be getting all cyber after only getting to the first couple of emails;however, after a while, you get to know someone and I am sure that the tension of dying to meet someone, and the testing of boundaries is only natural.
 smokines3
Joined: 4/11/2008
Msg: 33
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 1:00:15 AM
There is also nothing worse than developing feelings for someone who is completely incompatible with you in the bedroom. Sex is an integral part of a long term relationship. Everything we do is just wasting time until you make love again. Think about life, life is sex and sex is life.... sure those sicko 50 yo men who wanna suck your feet tell them to shove it, but asking about what you like, frequency, etc. is very important. I would go as far as saying if you don't get it out of the way on the first date or sooner you would be quite ignorant.
 karesse
Joined: 11/10/2005
Msg: 34
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 1:08:45 AM

Slow down Speedracer, what's your rush?


I use the phrase "Whoa there Romeo.. can we take the convo back a notch? We still need to determine if there's anything between us that will keep me at your side once your prostate eventually croaks"
 SapphirePoet
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 35
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History
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 1:25:30 AM
"A relationship is the price a man has to pay for sex..
Sex is the price a woman has to pay for a relationship!!"

"God... I think I'd rather die than buy into either of those theories. Or the rest of the attitude."
"The OP didn't describe such a scenario. If we're talking strictly about the IE set, then of course they're gonna talk about sex before meeting. Duh."
"I should think it's obvious who would and wouldn't be talking about sex based on what their profile says they're here for."

OMG I couldn't agree more girl!

Ladies, how about the ever popular question during the first 5 minutes of conversation......"Are you shaved?"
Oh that's always gonna make a girl get that warm and fuzzy feeling when you ask that one guys! Would you have the balls to walk up to me in a coffee shop and ask me this?
It is such a turn off and it doesn't matter who sweet or wonderful or hot I thought he was before..... He is now officially a TURD!
UH Bye Bye!
See ya and wouldn't wanna be ya!

:~()
 homeonthecoast
Joined: 4/8/2007
Msg: 36
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 1:30:33 AM
Well for starters, respect is personal. What one person finds respectful, another may find disrespectful. It has a great deal to do with background, but it also includes religion, relationship history, expectations, and more. Disrespect doesn't really happen until you tell someone you find their behaviour disrespectful. Until that point, they're simple going on what they've learned so far. If someone were to bring up a topic you found unpleasant and insisted on talking about it after you expressed your feelings, now that would be disrespectful. Finding out where your boundaries are is not disrespectful, quite the opposite.

Ironically one of the ladies I know on here has a few things listed in her profile as *disrespectful*, yet when we were talking about them one day, it turned out that she didn't even understand what half of the terms were, she'd just heard them used in a negative sense. When I explained what they actually meant, it turned out that she quite enjoyed several of them... Go figure.

It's amusing that all of the focus so far seems to be on what *guys* are doing... At least half of the women I've talked with who have wanted to meet have been quite open about their sexual expectations by their initiation. It's one of the great things about talking with mature women (generally over 30), they speak their minds. If they want to know something about you, they ask, if they don't want to talk about something, they say so. If you respect them, they respect you, if not they move on to someone who will. It's one of the reasons I have so many female friends, because I have the utmost respect for them.

Ironically, I've had several ladies express their opinion that we wouldn't connect because I wasn't open to *alternatives* or aggressive enough for them. I've also had a few who wanted some form of reassurance that I could match them in the imagination department. Interestingly enough, but I'd never considered writing erotica until a lady I was seeing suggested it. So far *every* lady I've told about it has expressed interest in reading it... So much for guys being the ones with sex always on the brain. Ladies I've known, worked with and been friends with for decades put the lie to that notion.

The whole point (I hope) isn't to point fingers at people who *don't* work for you, but to find someone who *does*. :-)

I know I don't appeal to a huge range of the ladies out there, just like most of them don't appeal to me. That's why there are so many different types of us, so we can each find someone who compliments us.

Cheers.

PS: it's funny Sapphire, but the only time I've *ever* heard that question, it's been from the girls...go figure.
 Apolinary
Joined: 9/5/2007
Msg: 37
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 1:51:06 AM
uwishtoo_1958 wrote:
> Since WHEN is talking about how good you are at oral sex, how often
> you like sex, how big you are - considered FLIRTATIOUS ???
> I will block someone in a heartbeat if they go very far - within a few
> weeks of chatting then maybe but by then I would have already been
> talking to them on the phone. funny but two gentlemen that I met online
> NEVER brought sex up - at all - and we ended up seeing each other for a
> month before we got intimate and then it was great - and it never would
> have happened if they had brought up how great they were. It was much
> better to find out together just how great it could be.


Well, your comfort level with these things and mine might actually be
the same. But once again, this only defines our own comfort level, where
as for other folks, their comfort level might be different. That's is all.

Apolinary
 Apolinary
Joined: 9/5/2007
Msg: 38
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 2:02:41 AM

Apolinary wrote:
Slow down Speedracer, what's your rush?

karesse wrote:
> I use the phrase "Whoa there Romeo.. can we take the convo back a notch?
> We still need to determine if there's anything between us that will keep me
> at your side once your prostate eventually croaks"


ROTFL.
Apolinary
 Apolinary
Joined: 9/5/2007
Msg: 39
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 2:39:43 AM
PalomaPark wrote:
> I think women don't like to talk about sex just like men don't
> like to talk about how much money they have or don't have.


You might actually be surprise how forward some gals are in
their flirting and conversations. And at times, I've personally
found it rather refreshing and actually appreciated a gal who
would speak with a bit more candidness about such things.


homeonthecoast [msg 36] wrote: > Well for starters.....


A most excellent post. Well worth reading.

Apolinary
 thehotwhtguy
Joined: 7/31/2007
Msg: 40
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 2:55:44 AM
Just a few notes, I believe that if you are getting to know someone in the beginning then it is a possibility sexual things should not be brought up, it certainly should not be the first thing brought up when meeting, that would explain his intentions.

Just a few things for the ladies, it would be nice if you could express to the guy that you do not think that is appropriate, and females do the same thing, I have had women ask me sexual questions when I Ask them to ask me anything they wanted to know. I am not offended depending on the question and tend to openly answer it. I Think that is part of knowing someone, is by chatting it away on what you truly want to know. Only women that tend to get offended by a sexual question, (if asked respectfully), are the one's who are stuck up about sex, haven't had much of it lately, or are so far stuck up into religion that they wouldn't even think about it. There are lots of guys who are not even worried about it per-say just asking.

I agree, it depends on the person, and if u have a high sex drive, then u want someone who does as well, do not talk to a female who does not if you do, you will never be happy. Also save the sex talk for later on, sometimes you will find out that she is truly a sex driven person, just likes to make sure he is the right guy before she opens up.

Some ladies need to stop being so prude though, cause they are thinking the same things, we just tend to ask them first.
 racing_guru
Joined: 2/24/2007
Msg: 41
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 3:06:21 AM
this makes interesting reading,

ulitmately most relationships end up of a sexual nature, and theres nothing wrong talking about sex, even before you meet, BUT both parties should treat the other with respect, unless someone were purely looking for sex i would not expect them to come straight out and say " do you like doing it x,y,z in an upsidedown position" indeed i'd be a bit shocked, but at the same time it wouldnt be such a bad thing because i would know where i stood in what they were looking for.

i've been in the position where chat has turned to a sexual nature, interestingly all the times i can remember it was the women that started it, which i never had a problem with, i think you just need to take each occasion at face value on its own merrits
 upstate-gal
Joined: 8/15/2007
Msg: 42
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 3:24:41 AM
When sex is the topic that early, it shows you that he has no respect.

He is looking for a cyber-sex session.

I have asked many men why they do this. Do the really expect to build a serious relationship by starting with online sex talk? I have been told that they frequently get into a cyber-sex chat that way...that is why they do it. They are NOT looking for anything else...unless it leads to a quick booty call. So, the answer is that they are NOT looking for a quality woman to build a long term relationship so it doesn't matter how many women they offend in their quest for the next cyber or booty call.

I tell men...if you wouldn't say it to me in front of your mother..then don't say it at all. Respect for me isn't optional. If they persist..I block them
 Raychl
Joined: 3/6/2008
Msg: 43
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 4:06:30 AM
I agree, I wouldn't be chuffed about it either and I find it sad its mostly guys who have been the ones with crass responses along the lines of 'life is short, whats your problem'? Its just so sleezy. You at least want to have actually met and established there's some chemistry going on first before you get into that sort of chat I think. I agree some seem to be only after sex but don't want to pay for it! It seems there are alot of guys out there who've had too much time on their hands to invent their perfect woman and all the things they want to do to them and cannot make the necessary adjustment to reality/what real women are actually like. At the end of the day there's no substitute for the good old fashioned 'getting to know you, getting to know all about you ... ' I feel a song coming on! Best of luck girl, Rachel
 Hugmeister
Joined: 3/17/2006
Msg: 44
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 4:07:50 AM
Completely out of line! Time to say......"next"
 cocomimi
Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 45
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 4:16:09 AM
Honestly i think thats something that it can be talked latter,not at the beggining....................it is such a turn off to me,when guys dont even ask for your name , but yet they are willing to tell you what they like n what not.But i cant complain honestly ...........most of the guys here are gentlemens......... thumbs ups you guys.....keep it up!!!!!!!!!!
 kathareeene
Joined: 7/26/2007
Msg: 46
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 4:17:51 AM
i agree n find it disrespectful when they mention sex too soon
it to me is none of THEIR business til they KNOW ME but o well there will always be pigs out there just be glad when they mention it cause the sooner u find out what they r up to the better for u
kathi
 k1w1angel
Joined: 3/17/2008
Msg: 47
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 4:22:42 AM
"This question could only have come from a woman..

God forbid, people want to find out if they are compatible before wasting their time and money


Only a man would say that

Let me tell you something Reg...there is nothing more uncomfortable then meeting somebody you've had sexual conversations with, only to find out that you have NO chemistry whatsoever.

Sorry, but thats something I stear clear of until the meet. If there's chemistry? Open season!"

Touche, how to turn me off, talk about your sexual interests in our first or second conversation, hey why wait until then, talk about it in your first 5 mins and what you want to do to me, yeah that will do it.................BYE BYE
 ________
Joined: 12/24/2006
Msg: 48
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 4:31:17 AM
Be thankful there's still some interest.....


Next time you drive by a cemetary, take a moment to pause and reflect. Life is short. Enjoy every minute of life that you can.


.......and sex life is much much shorter.
 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 49
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 4:34:58 AM
I can talk about sex on an objective level and not have it "get me excited". I'm interested in sexuality as a topic.

I don't however talk to someone about sex and what I want them to do with me or how big they are or whether I like oral before meeting and even on the first meet! First impressions and all that....

Some people just take things too far. I have learned though that there are some men who can talk objectively about sex and some can't. They don't understand that the conversation is NOT about possible "sex with them", so it's usually safer just to nip the convo in the bud before he starts it.

If a woman mentions something out of the ordinary sexually (non-vanilla), most men get all excited and they haven't a clue what the activity actually entails. Men naturally boast their sexual prowess (biology).

Women by the ways of society were taught that one should wait for sex and that talking about it and doing it too soon were wrong and men were taught that "conquering" the woman and "getting her to give in" is what men do. It's a biological and societal thing (watch some movies). So, in that vein men hear a woman talking about sex and he is thinking one thing. I can talk to a man about sex objectively until the cows come home, but it doesn't mean I'm thinking of sleeping with him or ever will be.

That said, a relationship with a woman is NOT only about sex for most men. Understanding that everyone is a sexual creature and men have a different biology is important to the puzzle, but it's not all the pieces. We us are motivated by sex after all (mate and breed), I believe it's inherent.

And while I'm all for finding out if I am sexually compatible with someone I certainly don't think before meeting or even the first meeting is always the forum to discuss it.
 Fefe_FXDL
Joined: 2/24/2007
Msg: 50
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 4/15/2008 5:06:00 AM
I am only comfortable flirting if it is with a guy that I wouldn't mind if he took it seriously. I don't flirt, online or in person, with guys I am either not interested in, or haven't decided yet. If I haven't met someone face-to-face, that decision hasn't been made. But once I meet them? I'll know in about 3 seconds.

So, talking online to someone I haven't met yet? If they start talking about giving me a massage, I get creeped out.
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