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 misszmsz
Joined: 5/31/2008
Msg: 525
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Talking about sex before even meetingPage 22 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
I like sex and more sex, but only with the right guy.

Tell him if he ever gets the pleasure after you meet to see if you are remotely interested and compatible.

Then you decide if you want to be the phone sex operator for free or to charge him $4.99 a minute.

[I am watching some guy getting his chest hair removed on tv . He is screaming in a foreign language yet I understand him.] This is truly funny.
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 526
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 12/4/2009 3:16:24 PM
I am going to chime into this topic again.

I think that the less vanilla someone is, the more important it is to discuss sexual compatibility before dating.

For instance, a woman with a high sex drive who likes to be tied up and whipped is going to be much less likely to just "let things happen" and find out a man's like and dislikes later.

A man with a lower libido and who is only comfortable with missionary style jackhammer or super gentle sex will NOT do it for her.

So I would argue that people on here who don't feel this is a necessary topic to discuss either A. don't take dating all that seriously and don't mind serial dating or B. are either vanilla or have a low sex drive.

I would predict that not a single person who has any sort of kinky likes or dislikes, or has a high libido would be ok with not asking -any- sexual questions before dating.

-8sf8
 ChefAmber
Joined: 5/12/2009
Msg: 527
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 12/15/2009 5:10:16 PM
A guy contacted me Sunday night, we chatted on the phone,nice guy. He asks me to meet him wednesday evening. I say okay no problem.
Last night, one night after his first message. He starts asking sexual questions, I ignore them and try to steer the conversation to something else. Eventually I tell him goodnight and am not happy with his being so out of line so soon. Around midnight he sends me a text asking if I "want him to cum over"

Okay that pisses me off because I told him already I am not jumping into bed with anyone. So I ignore the question until today. I texted him when I had a moment at work that I did not appreciate his trying to invite himself over for sex when we haven't even met. Also flat out told him, that if he expected our first meeting to end in sex he is barking up the wrong tree. Told him if that is what he wants he should find someone that is into that.

I am pretty much done with him by then. He did text and try to apologize for "misrepresenting himself" but I have blocked him and now ignoring messages etc. Women have to stand their ground when it comes to demanding being treated with some dignity. A lot of men see women as nothing more than a vagina sent here to be a sperm receptical. You will have to search harder to find the men who see women as an actual human worthy of respect.
 RobertKoi
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 528
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 12/15/2009 7:08:10 PM
"A lot of men see women as nothing more than a vagina sent here to be a sperm receptical. You will have to search harder to find the men who see women as an actual human worthy of respect."
------------
Don't fool yourself. The exact same thing can be said about women. Don't believe even for a second that women are any better.
 js38seaj
Joined: 7/8/2011
Msg: 529
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/17/2011 3:22:06 PM
I've been talking to a woman on here, on her profile it says that she is not on here for sex, yet that is mostly what we have talked about. Seems ironic to me, but women are a little confusing to me, lol
 MissPennyJane
Joined: 7/11/2011
Msg: 530
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/18/2011 2:11:00 AM
I'm sorry....if sex is the first thing on their mind, a relationship is the last thing on their mind. You are NOT a prude! Just keep respecting yourself and eventually you'll find someone who respects you the same way
 lightningslow
Joined: 12/24/2010
Msg: 531
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/18/2011 2:21:20 AM

I'm sorry....if sex is the first thing on their mind, a relationship is the last thing on their mind. You are NOT a prude! Just keep respecting yourself and eventually you'll find someone who respects you the same way

What an odd thing to say.

A relationship is formed over time, whether anyone likes to admit it or not sex is the first thing on everyone's mind. Thats why people get asked out because they find them sexually appealing.

Sex is the first thing on my mind when i see someone who i find physically appealing, i havent a clue about anything else until i get to know them.
 MissPennyJane
Joined: 7/11/2011
Msg: 532
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/18/2011 2:24:59 AM
Used2,

THANK YOU! I 've just always figured I'm old fashioned, but I'd really like to get to know someone before I jump in bed with them. One thing I've learned over the years is if I give you my body, my heart goes with it. I want to know the man I give myself to is someone I can trust! Does that mean I'm frigid? Hell no!! I've been told I'm quite "active" and "compasionate" in that department. But if a man starts a conversation wanting to know what I'm interested in in regards to sex, he's only interested in one thing, and it's not who I am as a person!
 BlueEyedGirl05
Joined: 7/24/2011
Msg: 533
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/19/2011 2:15:51 PM
I'm going to attempt to put my two cents in to this topic without being attacked.

I think that it is absurd to say that people who are willing to talk about sex before meeting should move over to the sexual encounters part of this site. Sex is an important part of a relationship for most people, so why wouldnt people looking for a relationship want to inquire about it with someone they are interested in dating? Just because someone asks you a few sexual questions does not mean that is all they care about. As long as the conversation is well balanced with other important topics and not all about sex I see absolutely nothing wrong with it.

When I say talk about it I mean questions like on a scale of 1-10 how kinky do you consider yourself not what do you want to do to me? I am looking for a relationship and when this topic is introduced I do not squirm as long as it is done tactfully and not all that a guy talks about.
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 534
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/19/2011 2:52:16 PM

I think that it is absurd to say that people who are willing to talk about sex before meeting should move over to the sexual encounters part of this site. Sex is an important part of a relationship for most people, so why wouldnt people looking for a relationship want to inquire about it with someone they are interested in dating? Just because someone asks you a few sexual questions does not mean that is all they care about. As long as the conversation is well balanced with other important topics and not all about sex I see absolutely nothing wrong with it.

When I say talk about it I mean questions like on a scale of 1-10 how kinky do you consider yourself not what do you want to do to me? I am looking for a relationship and when this topic is introduced I do not squirm as long as it is done tactfully and not all that a guy talks about.


Refreshing attitude, thank you.

If adults, getting to know one another, can't talk about things like this..then there is no sense in dating each other. You can tactfully inquire, and engage in conversation, about aspects like this, without setting the stage for anything else.
 CheezyChick
Joined: 9/23/2009
Msg: 535
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/19/2011 2:59:57 PM
I find it easy to distinguish between intelligent and open conversation, (which can include sex), and sleazy attempts at dirty talk ....either way, I don`t end up being offended.
 BlueEyedGirl05
Joined: 7/24/2011
Msg: 536
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/19/2011 3:28:03 PM
I agree it is something mature adults should be able to discuss and yes it is easy to distinguish the difference.
 BlueEyedGirl05
Joined: 7/24/2011
Msg: 537
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/19/2011 3:36:50 PM
I also think it is very closed minded and an antiquated mindset to say that women who answer those types of questions have no self-respect! I do not see how simply discussing sexual topics with someone makes you not have self-respect. I have tons, thank you!
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 538
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Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/19/2011 11:46:42 PM
msg.#1:

If a man talk about sex before meeting me, about his dislikes and likes when he doesn't even know yet my middle name. I'll tell him upfront That I charge for sex $2000.00 cold cash money down for 10 minutes whether he cum or not. End of discussion!!!
 ClaireChristine
Joined: 8/16/2011
Msg: 539
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/20/2011 4:44:21 AM
I think talking about sex before meeting is all they do, just talk.
It is disrespectful and really it is all projection and fantasy in their minds and they are just playing games with you.....
 ClaireChristine
Joined: 8/16/2011
Msg: 540
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/20/2011 4:45:14 AM
Yeah. Who wants to be some guys unpaid prostitute??
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 541
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/20/2011 7:47:37 AM
I find it odd since you have not met in person yet. Both of you could have no interest in each other at all upon meeting. Why do I want someone who will spend maybe 30 minutes with me drinking coffee and never seeing me again knowing about my sexuality? One of the problems I see regarding meeting someone online, and how the "weeding out" process is perceived is definitely not the same for everyone.
 suzisooo
Joined: 5/20/2011
Msg: 542
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/20/2011 10:04:55 AM
i hate this- it instantly puts me off and i move on-
i think, especially for me anyway,
i want to get to know a person as a friend..
surely thats the first most important thing?
if it takes a few days or whatever texting and emailing then so what, you get a feel for who this person is-
then, maybe meet up in the day- get along as friends-
why do men have to presume we want to snog them and grope them within an hour of meeting?
i hate that-
and they want to send you half naked /naked photo's-
what complete sado's
it basically proves to me that they use this site and a free sex site? cause thats how they presume we are going to behave..
and i for one will walk away and never comunicate with that person again- they are shallow and they give dating sites a bad name-
 avalon_moon
Joined: 4/2/2011
Msg: 543
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/20/2011 11:59:30 AM
I agree with a lot of what you say, divinelovepath. I think far too many people are concerned about how others will view them..but then, there are double standards applying to women and their sexuality, unfortunately.

However, many men are looking to simply get some kicks online through the sex chat and have no interest in a "keeper" at all. These are the ones that annoy most women...
 bunnyBiotch
Joined: 6/7/2011
Msg: 544
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/20/2011 12:21:02 PM
No you are not being a prude, but there is a difference between objective questions about sexually preferences and sleazy sex talk, as this poster said -

I find it easy to distinguish between intelligent and open conversation, (which can include sex), and sleazy attempts at dirty talk ....either way, I don`t end up being offended


I had a guy there other day not talking about sex specifically but continually complaining about his exes shaving habits or lack there of. After a few comments as to what he should've/could've done and trying to steer the convo elsewhere, he went back to biotching about this. It was off putting, and I get that he was letting me know one of his dislikes, but it was exsessive... And I am definately not a prude...

There is a fine line between informational sexual conversations and uncomfortable sexual conversations. But it is easy to distinguish between the two, one being fine and the other being offensive....There absolutely is a time and place for everything!

If you feel uncomfortable, that's valid and the way you feel, don't worry about it. Leave that person alone and find someone else you are more compatible with...
 cookies1972
Joined: 2/28/2011
Msg: 545
Talking about sex before even meeting
Posted: 8/20/2011 7:50:52 PM
pretty much right. if all a guy is talking about is sex that is all he is interested in. if he is interested in you he should want to know everything about you and if he isn't doing this run for the hills because there are some real jerks on this website!
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