| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 4/29/2008 7:27:12 PM | Well what's provocative to you? Underwear oftentimes isn't any less revealing then swim wear. Lingerie just has a provocative stigma attached to it, that swim wear doesn't. It's a cultural norm to see women in 2 piece swim wear, we don't think much of it, even though it typically shows off the body just the same. Do you have problems with both lingerie and swim wear? One or the other?
What if the women is big into the outdoors and she lives in warm climate? Maybe she is big into water sports and bikinis are actually a good representation of her lifestyle.
I don't know. Personally I don't think it automatically says they are "skanky" or "full of themselves" or anything like that. For some sure. Then again, I am guilty of it myself  | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 4/29/2008 10:32:24 PM | | I never understood this either. Happens on a lot of social networking sites where you see a woman pose in provocative poses, clothes and even have provocative names and statements on their pages but will also state that they do not seek anything sexual whatsoever. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/2/2008 4:04:41 PM | it's called a bait and switch. Most of these women will swear up and down that there's no ulterior motive to posting such pictures...that it's just them being confident.
The truth is that they're often right...they don't realize why they're ACTUALLY doing it...or worse...simply refuse to admit it. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/2/2008 4:47:57 PM | this is an easy one.
cuz men wanting them is their first desire. women envying them is their second desire (though these two may be switched in place). them feeling sexy is their third desire.
did you see having sex anywhere on this list? yeah, it didn't make the top 3.
you're not supposed to notice her looks. if you ignore how she looks, it shows how socially evolved you are. that you have some class & some game.
women disrespect men who tell them they're beautiful unless they're dating & they really care about the guy's opinion. pointing out the obvious is a sign of poor social skills.
pretend you don't notice & treat her just like anyone else. that's the polite thing to do - & what gets you closer to that sex that you want...
being online is the same as walking in the park. you wouldn't walk by a girl & say "nice ass" if you want to get some. you look at her in the eye & say "hi, how are you?" then you kinda sorta turn & look back innocently as you walk away. then she KNOWS you think she's got a nice ass, but you never had to be an ass to get there. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/2/2008 5:05:16 PM | I do think it is rude that guys would send e-mails or post questions regarding a strangers sexual wants or desires, but guys are perverts. It's funny seeing men acting the same way on a computer, hidden from repercussion as the same drunk idiots at a bar or club talking to a girl he finds attractive and dressed provocitavely. On the computer he doesn't need liquor to give him the stones to say something.
And there is a line where women don't need to be showing themselves in there photos if they don't want these responses. I do think some women are trying to fool themselves into thinking that they don't want to be talked to like that but subconciously they feel good, but don't want to admit it. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/11/2008 4:45:39 AM | OP, We ladies know that men are visual creatures (mostly) and some of us want to capitalise on that. Some women put the cleavage shots there, to draw you in, then in their profiles exemplify their stunning intelligence. You are supposed to be intrigued by the fact that this 'sex kitten,' is also deeply intellectual. You're supposed to forget about the cleavage and then have a stimulating conversation about astro-physics and philosophy.
Meh, it was the best I could come up with. LOL.
I have no idea why any self respecting woman (not looking for pure sex) would parade around in her panties, simply to get attention. It baffles my mind.
Sign me,
Keeping my clothes on. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/11/2008 5:35:43 AM | Well, in some ways - I am with the OP.
HOWEVER, just because a woman shows a bit of cleavage or a tad bit of leg in a photo on her profile doesn't give a guy license to come on in an email with "Hey Baby, how 'bout you and I F% *$!!!"
I feel that just as there are some that believe there is nothing wrong with putting a main pic up of them in their lingerie - there are those that feel there is nothing wrong with 'coming on' to a woman in such crude ways.
I have a picture of me cropped from a picture taken with my friends at the beach. In it I have no shirt on (DUH - I am at the beach!!!). I took a ration of cr@p from some about it.
This is a 'dating' site. Futhermore - it is FREE!!! What kind of behavior do you expect???
If you hang around in a not-too-nice bar in the bad part of town, are you shocked to not find people well dressed and well behaved!?!?!?
Come on people. Let's have some realistic expectaions.
1) there are people from one end of the spectrum to the other in the world
2) a representative sample of them are on POF
Best to all. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/11/2008 6:13:28 AM | | Cognitive dissonance my friend. Women want to believe they aren't like that, but they are. It's a problem of perception. No woman wants to be called a slut. Every woman wants a "nice guy" We've all heard that women should be able to do whateva they want, wear whateva they want, blah blah blah. But logically, it doesn't add up. So they have logically incompatible beliefs to avoid the conflict in their mental. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/13/2008 1:45:16 PM | I'm impressed by all the interest in this poser. Most of the answers made sense and offered a new aspect to consider. I think Devuchka's response was very revealing in that it offers insight into the "mystery" of women. They like "the game". It's all part of their inner desire to FEEL sexy; LOOK sexy, without compromising their integrity. they want men to notice them, but not to "notice" them. I think that's what was being said.
My consternation, as a male, is that it appears to be mixed messaging, and confounds me. I certainly am not prone to make untoward comments to a woman who dresses provocatively, but the thoughts are there that I'd like to get to know her; OBVIOUSLY based on her physical appearance. However; I recognize that she's hoping that the "right stuff" will become available to her. Her dress is merely "in case" the right stuff comes along.
However; on a dating site (even a free one), I think that posing in a provocative pose with sexy attire puts out a different message. The fact that it's in PRINT, is more permanent, and implies an attitude, not just a mood.
Bottom line; men are from Mars. Women are from Venus. That makes them Venutians. Based on that, I guess men are Penitians. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/30/2008 11:25:49 AM | Understanding women - Understanding men ? It's an age old question that most likely will never have complete clarity. We grow, we change, we expand, we evolve, we reamain through it all - - - human. Simple as that.
I can only speak my view on this, but believe that if a woman posts a pic in her negligee in a provocative position or in a manner that exudes her sexuality - or if a man posts a pic of his bare chest with that "come hither look", isn't it really about what is appealing to YOU as an individual ?
Think about it this way - if a woman were to post a pic in school girl attire, with a big lollipop and a sweet innocent expression - that would appeal to a few that liked "that look". If a woman were to post a pic in leather chaps, a doo rag, and project a bad girl attitude, that would appeal to a few that liked "that look". Or, how about the man who posted his pic in a suit and tie, that would appeal to a few that liked "that look". The draw is ...what appeals to us individually.
Then, throw into the mix the words on a profile that go along with those pics - then you begin to get a better understanding of who the person is - maybe a self confident woman that is quite intelligent but likes to express herself in a different light to determine who she is, what she wants, and how she can be that woman? Or, maybe the handsome man who is too shy in person to bare his chest publicly to avoid ridicule due to low self esteem, but can say he wants the perfect Barbie doll type.
I have worn ragged jeans and a tie-dyed shirt and had more admirers than I knew what to do with as opposed to having no second looks when I wore my best "little black dress" and felt my most confident. It really boils down to - what are you looking for? Who's looking for you?
We are accountable for ourselves and finding someone that we mesh with - mentally, physically, and spiritually. We shouldn't take the topical approach to what is posted, what is written - is always the truth.
Clear as mud, right ?  | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/30/2008 7:00:44 PM | I have cleavage and no matter what I wear short of a complete high necked sweater it always shows...the result..?? all the results of all the previous posts..
I took my pics down becasue I went to the trouble of cropping the pics and still there was a hint of cleavage and I mean hint ( like 2mm) and sure enough ..
".nice tits "and "you must be a good lay" messages..
I know guys are visual but...cripes
BC | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 9:59:02 AM | Attention and/or low self esteem! What woman do you know that doesn't like attention? Oviously it's more important to some women than others. All women want to be considered beautiful or sexy but there are also women out there that would rather a man be first drawn to her intellect, personality and character. For the most part, once a man see's a half naked woman, any other characteristics that he may normally look for are thrown out the window. Suddenly she's only a sex object.
Women who have low self esteem are more likely to disply those types of photos than women who are more secire with themselves. Someone else on here mentioned that men are visual and these women are just letting know what they would be getting...or something like that. Well, sure...men are visual but a woman can just as easily show her body off without photos of her laying on a bed spread eagle in her panties.
If I woman wants to show off her legs, a pair of shorts will do the trick. Got nice boobs and want to show them off? Nothing a tight sweater of a low cut shirt can't do. Got a killer A$$? Well if you have great legs chances are you got a great backside too.
Don't get me wrong, let these women post all the half naked photos they want. I'll gladly look at them. And by all means, I'm no prude...no where near it. Sometimes though it's just painful to come across some of these profile and like a train wreck....you can't just look away. LOL The trainwrecks of course are some of these profiles that you say OH MY GOD! What was she thinking! LOL
I guess my point is that a woman can still appear sexy and still keep her self respect and dignity. When she puts herself out there like a piece of meat and gets upset when she's treated like one, then she doesn't deserve any respect.
Seems like everyone wants to be a porn star now a days. LOL | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 5:40:44 PM | | I don't post provocative photos, so I'm just taking a guess here, but my guess is that you just aren't cute enough for them, and they are trying to attract someone cute and interesting to them, and they would get a positive response. Besides, if you make some sort of sexual comment right away, I can't see it being in a respectful and non-aggressive way. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 5:54:48 PM | It's a matter of advertising. They assume that they need to be sexy to catch our eyes, but the anonymity of the internet causes people to be total jerks... so it necessitates the "I will not sleep with you simply because you ask!" bit.
I find that it's a poor way to advertise if you're looking for anything real, but to each their own. Some people are into that. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 6:01:27 PM | | Well my opinion is that the ladies are interested in sex and are open minded but I feel that they might want to get to know someone before hearing all about what it does to the male testosterone. These ladies know that you guys all seem to think with the wrong head. Perhaps they want you to think about them in a flirtatious way but not an I want to go to bed way. I do not know if I am making sense. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 6:12:44 PM | Because some are full of crap thats why. Its the same as some who say they are good girls and they've slept with more than 40-50 guys and they are 25 years old. Guys are worse.
I have been emailed dozens of nude photos and nude videos from so called "good girls". I am gonna be shocked when the bad ones start doing it. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 6:23:56 PM | | Just like the ones that post the slender pics. of themselves when they were 20,then you find the overweight by 45+ lbs ,dye job pictures of them sprawled on the bed, with their boobs hanging out,stating that their (normal sized) ,and like riding harleys on a moonlite beach,but not looking for sex.. | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 6:26:41 PM | It does send a dual message - my assumption is that some women have poor "fishin" skills... they are taught that its important to be sexy and attractive to catch a man ... and yet they get confused when their sexuality brings about undesired responses... its more or less social misinformation .... you want to look hot to catch a man but you also want him to respect you ... lol! Its not an easy game to play ... some women,too, are just more sensual by nature, but that still doesnt mean they want a quick "shag in the sheets". Its a tough call....
this will definately be an interesting post! | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 6:45:06 PM |
but my guess is that you just aren't cute enough for them, and they are trying to attract someone cute and interesting to them...
I agree with D-Girl here.
Anyone can choose to post a provocative picture knowing it will garner an amount of attention - if a disclaimer in the profile states their desire they can feel justified in ignoring the mail from the people they DONT want mail from - whatever the content. If however, the mailer is from stock they consider acceptable, then they can respond to any mail whatever content. They've hooked..... | |
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| Why do women post provocative, yet state that sex is not their desire?
Posted: 5/31/2008 6:48:39 PM | Well all I'm gonna say in response to this thread is that........I can't think of any woman who doesn't really like sex....chances are they love it! But when you're on a dating site and you get messaged from guys who want to "hook up" or basically come right out and say they just want sex.....you really do get annoyed and a bit bitter.
I'm a firm believer in something a friend of mine told me "seduce my mind, and my body will follow." | |
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