| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 4/25/2008 6:34:36 PM | | I don't think you should drop out right away. I think it's all about honesty, first. Then it depends on whether the forum/email interactions are detracting emotionally or any other way from the relationship you are trying to form. If you keep soliciting new "friends", that may say something. Only you know what your true motives are. But if you just want to maintain old friends, and kind of see what others are doing, it can be a release. A way to bounce thoughts and be insightful. It depends how you use the site. Active site or not, time always tell the truth, doesn't it? | |
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| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 4/28/2008 6:50:06 AM | POF is a dating site, if you aren't dating, should you still be here? Sure, if you are a cheater or a troll. If you have made friends on this site, then you would be able to contact them through social networking sites which are geared toward contacting your groups of friends, not potential dates. If you have "friends" and the only place you can contact them is on a dating site, they really aren't your friends. Most sites like to have people keep their accounts active because they want to show numbers to their advirtisers and potential sign-ups, but I think that is unethical and messed up, to lure people in by saying that it is a dating site, when really a bunch of people are using it for social networking.
Also, the forums on this site are geared toward dating. Are you really so uninteresting or uninformed that you can't spend your time on a forum that has some subject matter that is a little more important. Sure dating is one part of life, but if it is all you can talk about then you have a pretty sad existance.
You may think you want to go to the get-togethers and things posted on this site, but again, this site is supposed to be for singles, and if you aren't single and are going to single mixers, then you are either looking to cheat or you are desperate and have no friends.
You may also think that your input is relevant to discussions because you have already "found that special someone", but really, no it isn't. If you aren't dating, who cares what you think about why men don't date BBWs or what sign is best to pick up at a bar. If you aren't single, your input is not relevant unless you happen to be a sociologist and not just an ass with no life.
If you aren't dating but spend your time on dating sites, then there is something wrong with you. Find something more interesting in life, or just get a life in general. | |
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| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 4/28/2008 7:58:40 AM | | I'm so happy to know that you are an expert on the subject and everybody here should follow your words. Now, if you have an opinion, it would be a different matter. There are people who would agree with you and people who would disagree with you, but, they are free to give their opinions. Nobody will agree with everything all the time. | |
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| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 4/28/2008 3:33:47 PM | | ^^^^^ I'm with you. I am glad to know that Markus (the admin/creator) also doesn't have this opinion, I would guess if he did he wouldn't have all the different options available to people. It is nice to know he doesn't think everyone is out to "abuse" his site. | |
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| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 4/28/2008 10:30:34 PM | Well we can all see Nephilim will be here searching for quite awhile ! 
Hi everybody, new here and thought i'd chime in.
as a long time member of a dating site that has forums & chat rooms. and now the owner of my own singles network site. I can't see why anybody should leave ,or even hide their profiles. The fact that you have met somebody, shows that the site really works. Why should you be obligated to break off contact with freinds you have made?
Dating sites have grown beyond simple matchmaking and compatibility scripts, they have evolved into active, thriving communities. people who are active in the forums and chat rooms are great resources for newcomers. If you've met somebody. share your success story, give other searching members a glimmer of hope. if it makes you feel more comfortable, add "taken" or "not available" to your profle. i have many couples on my site that say "just here for freinds".
The point is, don't give up something you enjoy. just because you've added somebody to your life. | |
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| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 5/2/2008 8:31:41 PM | Hi Nephelim,
I actually agree with you that this is not really a friendship site but more gear to dating . Of course, there is always the possibility of meeting people that you like as friends and perhpas you might like to continue the contact , organizing events and the like....chat by phone, meet at the theatre etc... But the reality is if you find someone who really really attracts you or you spend a lot of time with, there would be a tendency to actually not to pay too much attention to this site because you can always reach friends by other means.......Have a good night!!! | |
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| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 5/3/2008 12:07:48 PM | Well
I just recently met someone and we chatted and hung out for a couple of months, while we were seeing where it was going>>
I took off my pictures so I would not get so many emails out of respect to him and myself. And i did not date anyone else AND if i did get an email I would tell them right off the bat that I was seeing where it was going and not dating anyone else.. Even though we were just friends. (BUT!!!! THAT is me!!!)) To hard to keep up with everyone!! Even though he said I needed to go out.
He kept his up and he kept looking and found someone else that he was more interested in... That was more into his social and business circle than me!!!
IF they are seriously thinking of being together.
Then you should put eveything in that relationship. And not so much time on here.
But if you are just friends then stay on here, because your next partner might be around the corner.
AND< if the people you met prior on here, are your friends then they would understand why you don't keep in touch with them all the time, that you are working to establish a relationship first then they come afterwards. | |
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| Should we stay on POF after finding somebody?
Posted: 5/3/2008 2:03:42 PM | Cindy,
There are many reasons that people do what they do. In your case, it looks like he was just not satisfied with you or he just wanted to play the field. I'm not attached to anybody for 6 months now. The reason I posted here and left my profile (of course I changed it to say I was taken at the time), was that she worked 40 hr weeks and I'm retired. Do you realize that there is nothing on TV during the daytime LOL. I found that posting in the forums (either joking with friends or being serious) was a way to keep me busy and I did not write to anybody that I had not already made friends with. Of course, to keep it honest and upfront, I kept her informed on who I communicated with and what I posted in the forums. Your pictures show a very lovely lady. Again, either you were used or he just did not like something about you. Good luck fishing. | |
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