| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 3:20:23 PM | | I think its good that she is being honest about it. You have to look at it this way, you could go out with a woman and she may not tell you she is infected, and worst case scenerio you end up having sex. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 3:24:21 PM |
She dropped a bombshell tonight and told me she has AIDS.
My confidence in dating has now gone completely out of the window.
I am thinking now it is time to give up on sex before I seriously get caught out.
What do others think ?
I think you should have thanked her for being honest and upfront with you. She might turn out to be a great friend.
But does she just have HIV or has it developed into AIDS? | |
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| She has AIDS and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 4:11:32 PM | | Some empathy at this time would be a God send for her! I also agree that she could undoubtedly use a good friend who is not judgemental. HIV though infectious is not as bad as its reputation. I read about a married couple were one of them had HIV and the other partner was not infected. Transmission is not automatic...it takes a blood to blood contact. Good Luck! | |
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| STDs
Posted: 4/24/2008 4:20:54 PM | She is not the only women with an STD.
This is why you TALK to people before exchanging fluids!!!!
Yes, she had guts to tell you, but really, you people NOT have the sex talk anymore?!
If you can't ASK your partner about their possible STDs and issues, you are not ready to have sex with them.
Keep dating, just don't stick your penis into unknown territory. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 4:42:44 PM | | Ok.... First, she has aids; that doesn't mean she isn't capable of love or is she incapable of having someone love her. I think what you should do is be her friend and simply tell her that you enjoy her friendship; but, you can't, for your own personal reasons, become involved otherwise with her. I think she did the right thing by telling you! Bombshell? If she'd told you 3 months after dating and before you had sex with her she had aids; that would be a BOMBSHELL. CHATTING? I think you're overreacting totally. You've only been chatting a few weeks? That's nothing. Grow up.... People have aids and still deserve to have friends; the best thing you can do is still chat with her and be her friend. I can imagine how lonely she feels if she simply looses friendships over having aids. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 5:13:51 PM | So, you met a woman who has AIDS. How does this in anyway effect your confidence in dating???
She's ONE woman. Oh, but I am remembering a prior thread you posted... I think I told you to give up then. See, ya should have listened to me! | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 5:55:18 PM | | Jim, I was reading this all the way through and had formulated the same opnion as you by the second post. Must be a good first date if your likely to contract HIV, or can you get that from been in the same bar/(insert venue of choice.) now? | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 6:07:04 PM | Well good for you OP now everyone on POF knows there is a woman from England likely on here with AIDS . Probably in your area. Your a real peach. Someone shares something very private with you and you broadcast it on the forums. She's not the first and wont be the last..........but she is honest....you shoud have respected that
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 6:21:03 PM | | She told you so that is a good thing, but it does point out the realities of what is out their, its best to take things slow and ask for a medical certificate beofre coming intimate with someone you dont know and use protection........ Good post | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 6:33:46 PM | Maybe the next person she takes in her confidence, will not only make a thread about it, but give everyone her profile name.... Maybe it's just me, but i think you showed very little class writing this thread. The lady in question showed alot of honesty by being right upfront with you. You reward her by writing this thread.
I can only imagine how she feels if she see this thread. Might make her think twice about revealing her illness to the next guy.
Kudos to her for honesty..... to you for betraying her trust. | |
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NERO1
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Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 39 | |
| She has AIDS and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 6:41:06 PM | QUOTE: Often, when ive felt suicidal, ive wished to meet someone with aids and catch it from them, to stop the endless grind, in a slow and knowing manor.
>>>> There's gotta be a better way than that........not that I encourage checking-out early, but... I used to do a lot of helper work for people who have full-blown AIDS (mostly they were men but I'll just say "people") here in Chicago and it's a complete mind blower when you see a guy my age, or your age, wherever in between, who weighs about 110 , 105 lbs, wheelchair-bound or even bed-ridden in some cases, and covered in these purple lesions, struggling to breathe. You can see the skull beneath the skin, literally. | |
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| She has AIDS and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 7:27:10 PM | I see you all preaching that the op should not have made a forum post about this matter and he betrayed her trust, so why didnt you all vote to delete the thread hmmmm?
Mods should remove this, its obviously about someone in his area and its too close to releasing medical information about someone. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 7:37:59 PM |
I don't know, I can't believe that she would be happy to see that you posted this - even if nobody knows who she is . . . that was a very personal thing for her to tell you.
Exactly. When are people going to learn that not EVERYTHING that happens in their lives has to be posted here? I mean seriously. This woman has a virus. She told you about it (which was absolutely the correct thing to do) probably because she trusted you. IF she sees your post, how the hell do you think she's gonna feel? I know that if I shared something that personal with someone on here, and they turned around and make an attention-seeking (and YES, that's exactly what it was, whether you want to own up to it or not) post on the forums, I would be livid.
When did the forums become a blog? When did people become so co-dependant on the other users of this site that they have to run every damn thing by them? I don't know if I should be amused or sad.
On a side note, I'm thinking about shaving my balls tonight. What do you guys think about that? It's been about 2 weeks and they're getting kind of fuzzy. Please guys, I need some guidance here. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 9:31:14 PM | Excellent point.
Well good for you OP now everyone on POF knows there is a woman from England likely on here with AIDS . Probably in your area. Your a real peach.
And, to add to what I wrote earlier today: This does not mean the end of dating for either of you. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 9:56:56 PM | I'd be happy she told you...we had a guy where I'm from just sentenced for sleeping with hundreds of women knowing he had aids.....his favorite place to meet women was on the internet--they tracked him all over Canada and the States....hundreds of women were tested--some positive some not--there are hundreds that weren't tested--some too scared to come forward....your thread didn't surprise me OP....I've always believed there was a very high percentage of STD's on these internet dating sites...an overwhelming amount of promiscuous people..jmo | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 10:11:05 PM | She was honest to you and she is going thru probably the harshest disease and some of the harshest prejudice because of it. yes it is contageous and no you should not have sex with her, but it shold not stop you from being her friend. You got along with her before, she dropped the bomb now it is your decision to be her friend or not.
Furthermore, there are many couples that have an hiv infected partnee and they them selves are HIV negative but they have a romanti and quite sexualy active life thru the use of safer sex practices. HIV uis not the end of the world anymore for smoe people now on proper medicine regimins and healthier living practices. Study up on it if you think things may develop.
I can not blame you for running away though and niether does she. Just bbe a man and educate yourself and try being a friend. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 10:20:20 PM | | This is the internet, sometimes people make things up, sometimes they dont.....who knows or even cares..you have betrayed someones confidence whether its true or it isnt, which should remind everyone on here not to tell you anything they wouldnt want the whole world to know. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 10:44:34 PM | I think that it took a lot for her to tell you that she had AIDS. It is not something that one puts on their profile. A lot of people are still not educated about AIDS and assume many things about how the person got it and how it can be transmitted. She waited until she was comfortable enough to tell you and she told you before you guys were intimate so I do not know what she did wrong. She was honest about it. It takes courage to tell someone things like that and kudos to her for telling you.
~Carrie | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/24/2008 11:15:59 PM | | So, should she just give up on dating altogether?? I can understand not announcing it on her profile, and I can understand people not wanting to pursue a relationship if they're worried about it, but at least she was honest about it! Turn her down if you want, but don't make it sound like she shouldn't be allowed on here. That's a shame. It's not the end of dating. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/25/2008 9:05:20 AM | i just did a forum thread search on AIDS. seems others have raised this issue, as well as provided some educational tools. i would suggest that people peruse and read. the very end of my search, a person asked if s/he could meet others with aids. sadly no one anwered. if you know of sites where people "with" aids can chat and meet, maybe you can provide it, so we can pass it on to those who need it AND the woman who is the OBJECT of this thread, can find some solace. hopefully she can see that many of us here are rooting for her. maybe she won't make her name publically known, but can contact us privately. i believe that the better way for her to meet people is to get out there and get involved. that way people can be exposed to ALL of her as she is not her disease.
i know that with one other controversial disease, that people have a code that they tuck into their profiles if they are looking to date or talk to others who share this problem. i guess they found it on a self help website. not sure how it started, but it's a great idea, i think. hopefully, there is a similar secret flag for others with other issues. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/25/2008 9:38:20 AM | I have a list on one of my websites, of over 100 free dating sites. There are several sites for people who are HIV+, or have
other STDs. The rules do not allow me to post the address here, but I will provide it happily to anyone who wishes to email
me. I currently have no email restrictions on my profile. | |
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| She has AIDs and is on POF. Is this the end of dating ?
Posted: 4/25/2008 11:08:16 AM | Well, if she was honest about it, what the hell is the problem?
Hmm....screw it...I've posted the rest of my life in these forums, might as well put this out there too. I contracted herpes from Welder. He didn't know that he had it since he has never had an outbreak....still doesn't. There were some people that we recreationally smoked with...AS SOON as I found out that we had HSV I went and knocked on their door and told them. Now, it would be very rare that they would contract it from us just by smoking...but it CAN still happen.
If I were to be back on the dating scene, I would def. tell guys I talked to. If they didn't like it...well, don't talk to me.
Another thought...although it is a bit twisted, but maybe she told you that to see how you would react and to see if you were as into her as you were acting.
~Welder's Girl~ | |
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