| what would you do?
Posted: 4/26/2008 1:44:51 AM | | The relationship sounds like it's pretty much one-sided from the description. Is she aware that it takes 2 for a relationship to truly work? | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/26/2008 3:04:39 PM |
Go with LaughingLibra....she'll never steer you wrong!
Awww.... thanks hon.....  | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/26/2008 4:33:59 PM | | I did not listen to my friends. Should I have? They were right in concept, but it was still my decision. Weigh everyones advice in consideration, do not disregard it, but nor should it be the main factor in relationship determination. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/26/2008 4:36:41 PM | | look she wont pay for things she says she will,. she wont do anything anymore,. to me she is selfish. she should be helping you out, she is just using you if what you are saying is true. i would tell her she either helps or its over! a relationship is 50 50. not 90 10. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/26/2008 5:33:38 PM | | If this is true and not an exaggeration, the woman is a leech. Please don't allow yourself to become just another bitter guy who's divorced and used up. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/26/2008 6:20:00 PM | LOL ...didn't really like to give advices what to do 
I just wondered if someone could be masochistic enough to enjoy a relationship with a girl like her... | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 7:05:26 AM | | Talk to her tell her your feelings. If you started out the relationship like this then maybe it is your fault. But you have to be you and talk to her not your friends about it or this site. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 11:12:24 AM | | Well OP my advice to you is not listening to your friends. Since most likely she isn't dating your friends, they have no room to talk. Personally don't agree with the situation as it seems that she is using you for little more than material gain and using sex every once in a while as a way to return the courtesy. Yet follow your own heart in the matter because no one can really know what's truly "best" for another person. Even if it is "better" what is suggested, the person may not be ready for such... | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:11:29 PM | | She sounds lazy or just takes u for granted...move on. Been there, they get worse with time. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:25:27 PM | OP,
1) Your friends aren't in this relationship, YOU are
2) It takes two to tango, and it doesn't sound like she's even keepin' in tune to the beat, let alone dancing...
wassup? | |
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T474T
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Joined: 3/10/2008
Msg: 37 | |
| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:28:38 PM | i would say think about it seriously, and long and hard. If she is missing her birth control it could be a trap to keep you "in" her life and to pay the bills regardless of how she feels about you.
To me, a relationship is 100% / 100% each pulls the same weight. But you seem to be the molly maid in the deal and she isnt helping, no um no. Bye bye babe.
Get out before she traps you and 20 yrs down the rd you think WTF was I thinking????? | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:33:08 PM | I am not an expert but in my opinion , maybe you should write a pros and cons list.
If the Cons out weighs the Pros, then maybe it's time to move on. Ask yourself this... Would being without her make me more happy?
It sounds like a mentally draining situation. Do you really need that? | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:50:08 PM | My question back to you: If you don't want to take the advice of friends who know you and your situation, why are you now asking TOTAL STRANGERS what you should do?
Friends can be objective...You aren't because you are IN the situation. While you shouldn't do anything based on their advice alone, you should take it into consideration.
And, previous posters are correct...she sounds awful! | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 8:53:18 PM | hardtimes...
1) she does nothing around the house
2) she doesn't take her birth control
3) she won't have sex with you
4) she makes you pay for everything
Um... common sense here!! Stay with her and life is going to be pretty miserable. Leave now before she decides to have sex with you, gets pregnant and then you're really screwed.
Sharzi | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 9:11:15 PM | | You have to ask if you should stay with her? Rule #1, if she is not taking her birth control like clockwork you are doomed to get her knocked up & "stuck" for the rest of your life. She sounds like a real peach. I would send her packing ASAP. Why on earth would you pay for darn near everything for 2 yrs? That's INSANE! | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 10:08:19 PM | She stays because it is easy and comfortable for her. You will continue to build resentment, which will lead to losing respect, then love. I have been there, which is why I divorced.
Sometimes it is hard to end a relationship because you are comfortable with that person and don't want to start over. Only you can decide which side is worse. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 10:15:24 PM | Are you staying with her cos you think she needs you?
Are you staying with her cos you think you won't find someone who needs you?
There are lots of women out there who will be respectful to you...not use you...not allow you to pick up after them.
I think you are needy... there are other women out there.
Get out while you can now... this is a sign of things to come... if you are not happy with the situation now...warning it gets worse. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 11:17:57 PM |
I'm nuts to stay in this relationship?
Yes.
I wouldn't stay if I found myself in that situation. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 4/30/2008 11:30:40 PM | | I would decide if I liked all this drama and self-pity or if I wanted to have a real relationship with someone who respected me. The longer you wallow in the attention you get from all the drama, the more likely you are to continue to seek out women who treat you like crap, take responsibility for what you want in your life and what you allow into your life. The poor, poor pitiful me act is nothing but attention seeking. | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 5/1/2008 1:12:19 AM | YOOOOOO!!!!
end it now now now...
you just gave me four reasons and im sure you have more, sounds like you may be scared, listen dude it can only go up from here, you will upgrade
sit down alone, take back a huge bowl of da cronic, and tell her on the phone its over that way she cant convince you to keep letting her take advantage of you.....  | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 5/1/2008 1:39:46 AM | Kick her to the curb and find someone else. Life is to short and people rarely change.  | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 5/1/2008 4:04:14 AM | you ask
I'm nuts to stay in this relationship?
or Am I just a sentimental fool?
actually, you're both.
so what are you getting out of this relationship? when you figure that out, then you'll figure out if you want to stay and work with her to get it on track, or whether you need to move on.
true friends usually try and protect you, but sometimes just want you selfishly free so you can be with them again - so i disagree they are objective at all.
so decide for yourself what you want in your life and then move it in that direction. you also have not mentioned why your girlfriend is acting like this - does she want you to leave? is she seeing someone else? where is your communication???
one bright note -
well, if you're hardly having sex, then lack of birth control isn't really such a problem now, is it?  | |
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| what would you do?
Posted: 5/1/2008 5:42:25 AM | OP, let me rephrase your question: "I am a doormat who does all the giving in a relationship and gets nothing back. Shall I continue to be a doormat?"
Oh, I bet she says she 'loves' you and that's why you stay, right? This is what 'love is not enough' means. Eventually you'll get sick of being the sex-starved housekeeper and maid ( ladies, does this sound familiar? ) and leave. Do it now because you'll do it eventually anyway. | |
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