| Change Me - But Your So Damn Good Looking ? ? ?
Posted: 4/28/2008 5:21:51 AM | I look at it this way. People should be allowed to have their own identities. I don't like it if im told to constantly how I should look and what not.
At the same time I do respect what girls like. So it's okay for a girl to suggest a hairstyle that they think would look good on me. It's okay to have some clothes to wear that they would like to see me in.
That dosen't mean that im not going to dress the way I want when I want. When I feel like it I wear whatever pair of jeans and shirt I want. Just that I'm also flexible. And really see no big deal in wearing whatever a girl might liket to see me in from time to time.
I wouldn't want someone to pull that change who you are kind of thing thats total bunk.
You can't go around trying to change a person since thats like insulting them for who they are. I think it's okay though for a girl to let me know what kind of things she likes and from time to time i'm willing to oblige to keep the relationship fun.
My personal identity is important but I also like to keep the relationship fresh and fun. If I didn't look different from my actual look now and then. I couldn't add some sense of new to the relationship and my actual sense of style would become stale.
I can understand it in that way. I would be annoyed by anyone who constantly criticized me for how I dress. I just would be fine with the occasional you would look sexy wearing this shirt once and a while. Stuff like that is okay now and then.
No body should have to do it if they don't want to and no one should push a person to do anything drastic either. Also the partner should respect the other persons sense of style and who they are.
Still relationships are also about respecting each others desires from time to time. So it's okay to give some leeway. It's something that has to be communicated properly though. With respect for who the person is. Mutual respect and acceptance for who the other person is, are the most important things that two people should have for each other.
A good example is in public I should have the right to pick whatever shirt I want, at work I'm going to dress how I like too. If it's a special dinner, or something like that. Or a day off where I have nothing to do and im going to spend time with the person. Then im willing to wear something that they like. Since it's really just fufilling another persons desires now and then. Compared to trying to completly change a person which is really annoying.
A good way of putting it is that if I was told by someone I look retarded the way I am I definately would rebel. If they don't like my taste in music or television or what not they have to deal. If they have respect and acceptance then I'm somewhat open to wearing something nice that they think is better on occasion. I'm willing to listen to different kinds of music but thats not going to change what I like and don't. Maybe I might like a new song or learn something about a kind of music im not into. Thats fine. It won't mean i'm suddenly a different person and I have to like what the person tells me to like. I'd be cross then.
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