| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 11:29:52 AM | In response to message 7 from Sanschele, why are you so vitriolic and hostile, name calling and personally attacking me, since you mention you have set your standards appropriately high and are allegedly happily and successfully dating away? Not every woman can say she dates more at 49 than she did at 20 unless perhaps she was in a convent or jail when she was 20. I say congratulations and more power to you!
So, why did you choose to take one short line out of context from my message and rail on about it? By itself this line is meaningless. It ONLY refers back to middle aged women who set their standards too high and are frustrated about finding men to date. It is anything but a global indictment of middle aged women who are dating.
By the way, disenchantment with members of the oppositie sex also occurs to men setting their standards too high. Setting standards too high leads to frustration and disillusion with dating results, no matter what one's sex. Now, does that make you feel better?
p.s. What brand of cat food do you buy? I may want to invest in the stock of the company that maunfactures it! | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 11:51:26 AM | Maybe it's best to abandon the standards. Where are they getting you anyway?
What one person thinks is a standard, others will see as a barrier and in the end the standards shift anyway.
I've seen many people delude themselves into thinking that guy shouldn't be with that fat chick or that gorgeous woman shouldn't be with such a slob but it's usually single people that aren't in a relationship making that call.
I find lots of humor in the irony. | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 1:40:38 PM | By setting their sites on unattainable mates, they avoid dealing with true intimacy. Interesting concept, incorporating "men" and some sort of anticipated outcome (thus implying "planning") in the same discussion. Intriguing... I must investigate this fascinating possibility. | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 2:18:22 PM |
5'5" to 5'10", blonde, slender and stacked and 32 to 50 years of age contact me and I will see what I can do to help!
^^above was taken from Mr LetLag's profile. He is 66 years of age. He either has one helluva sense of humour or his standards have been set tremendously higher than most! However, I bet ya he does get replies!!! | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 2:26:00 PM | | Lots of women's profile say they want to find a man who knows how to treat a woman, that they like the finer things in life, that they want to be wined and dined, that they love to travel. Some are quite direct in the desire to find a guy with lots of money who will spoil them and finance the good life in exchange for vaguely disguised offers of physical delights. | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 3:24:15 PM | Lots of men's profile say they want to find a woman who knows how to treat a man, that they like the finer things in life, that they want to be wined and dined, that they love to travel. Some are quite direct in the desire to find a woman with lots of money who will spoil them and finance the good life in exchange for vaguely disguised offers of physical delights.
Oh the irony of it all Mr. R!!!!! | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 3:43:18 PM | | Moonchild, you extracted only the last part of a sentence from my profile. That sentence begins"If you are a well educated erudite Caucasian lady," ; and yes, most people would find my standards high yet at present they are working just fine for me. The part of the sentence you cited is obviously tongue-in-cheek and just for fun because I am not seeking nor expecting to find a dating partner on POF. I am here for the fora. | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 3:43:53 PM |
Lots of women's profile say they want to find a man who knows how to treat a woman, that they like the finer things in life, that they want to be wined and dined, that they love to travel. Some are quite direct in the desire to find a guy with lots of money who will spoil them and finance the good life in exchange for vaguely disguised offers of physical delights.
....Hey I don't have a problem with that as long as he doesn't.....which reminds me of a limerick......I once knew a woman who offered her honor
So I honored her offer...
And all night long,
I was on her and off her.
...maeflowers | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 4:04:30 PM | Mr. JetLag...
My humble apologies if I took your thought out of context. Sometimes tis difficult to understand the meaning of the written word....
Here for the fora? Plenty of fish, er I mean plenty of that for sure! | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 4/30/2008 4:39:32 PM |
I once knew a woman who offered her honor
So I honored her offer...
And all night long,
I was on her and off her.
Ah Mae. That gives on again/off again relationships a whole new perspective. | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/1/2008 4:20:20 PM | If one sets their standards too high, it can bring a false sense of security. When the laundry list/requirements in a mate is so long, how can one get hurt? You can't, because you aren't going out, you aren't meeting people. Sometimes, you've gotta weed through the frogs/toads to get to the Prince or the Princess. Besides, it's a way to get to know yourself, by pulling those weeds. Oh, and working muscles you didn't know you had  | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/1/2008 5:44:24 PM |
That gives on again/off again relationships a whole new perspective. Life is different when viewed horizontally.
'Course, vertical's not bad, either.
Bickering back and forth between a male forum reader and a female forum reader is the closest some people at POF ever get to a sex life. Shoot, it's the closest I get in Life period.
Annudder  | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/3/2008 11:57:46 PM | From my observations during 14 years on the middle aged and older dating scene many but thankfully by no means all women 40 and over set their standards far too high. They fail to recognize they are no longer princesses in age, appearance or temperament. Men are no longer drawn to these women as they were in their younger years
mmmmmm and you Jetlagbob, at 66 are expecting to date a woman 32/50. Now is that double standards or what. Geez, a 32 year old could be your grand daughter. What is wrong with men. At 66, I bet there are more crinkles and creases than there were when you was young as well. I am 58 and the only reason I would like to date someone younger is because the men I have met that are my age, all look old enough to be my father, and where is your pic :) | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 5:01:24 AM |
A recent thread talks about older men who have let themselves go, physically, yet expect to attract 25 year old fitness instructors, super models, and otherwise hot chicks. Some people are angry at such men, others feel sorry for them
On purpose? I doubt it. Setting standard too high is comedic but I doubt you'll find anyone claiming they set their standards high in order to not find a partner. They're delusional, thinking they're somehow above the rest of us.
Some people are angry with men because they can't control their anger. Some feel sorry because they can't face their own anger and still need a way to feel superior.
It's no use to mingle with us mere mortals when your 'standards' are better. You will have a difficult time of finding anyone to meet those 'standards'. | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 5:55:28 AM |
On purpose? I doubt it. Setting standard too high is comedic but I doubt you'll find anyone claiming they set their standards high in order to not find a partner. They're delusional, thinking they're somehow above the rest of us.
They want to prove a point ... **What a great catch they STILL are** I don't think they will be proving anything anytime soon. | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:22:42 AM | Everyone is different...so our life and standards too...
What is important...only how you deal and how you feel about...and how feel people around you...
Some people live fantasy life...some play games...some live real life...
We always have choices...until time we will see is no choice for us...
So...let them live their life...
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 7:25:09 AM | I admit...I sometimes *Play Outside My League*.....but I'm realistic about it, for the most part..!!
I can admire a *Super-model*-type...even send a *Note of Admiration* . .
But with the understanding that _Their_ 'standards' most likely disqualify me
for a potential LTR..!!
..but I can still admire them..
Besides . .
* I'm not a big fan of the Golddigger-type...
They're Snooty , Conceited and such....
- cause if I had the *BLING* to go with the hype....
I wouldn't be Here , very much . . ! *
Not All The Good Ones Are Taken .. !!!! | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 8:16:45 AM | [From my observations during 14 years on the middle aged and older dating scene many but thankfully by no means all women 40 and over set their standards far too high. They fail to recognize they are no longer princesses in age, appearance or temperament. Men are no longer drawn to these women as they were in their younger years. Consequently such women are repeatedly disappointed and frustrated by being consistantly turned down by men they want and over time frequently become vitriolic and hostile towards men. They blame their inability to date the men they want on the men and engage in male bashing rather than recognize they were not being realistic in evaluating themselves in the first place. Few of these women seem to be able to reset their standards to reasonable and achievable levels and end up alone while other more realistic women end up with mates.]
Just my opinion, but a statement such as this could me misconstrued as an 'avoidance' in itself...why is so much precious time & energy spent on over-analyzing when it could be spent on meeting & connecting? | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 8:28:57 AM | I agree w/ the OP...I have had many men pick on me saying I am heavier than what they would like when they themselves were ugly slobs- no nice way to put it!
People who are delusional are oftentimes that because it is a security blanket. How safe it feels to yearn for a perfect super model & admire them from afar, like a teen ager w/ a poster of their favorite pop star on the wall, daydreaming about a never-to-happen future w/ such person!
When one does that, they don't have to work on themself, do they?
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 9:26:05 AM | Yeah OP, I agree that many people "set themselves up for failure", whether consciously or not, in some areas of their lives.
Then again, many don't.
Nothing to debate there, in my opinion.
But if you're looking for personal experiences, personally I've never sat and contemplated my "standards"... whether they were high or low or even to be numbered and named. 
If a person is beautifully friendly, they have a chance with me!
That doesn't mean beautiful in body, by the way. 
It means their friendliness is given to the world in a beautiful manner.
(Namats, do you realize that when you type in that fashion, people get lost in the punctuation doo-dad's and it's so tiring they just don't want to read and understand the post? It becomes a skip-over post)  | |
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 10:26:13 AM | Everything in this big ...marvelous world is on...purpose...
Show me one little thing...without purpose...I'll be glad to change my mind...
Our standards...whatever are good or not...they grow with us...and they start in our genes...
If you are over 45...it is too late to be born again...sorry...take me who I am...or stay away from me...
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 10:58:31 AM | "mmmmmm and you Jetlagbob, at 66 are expecting to date a woman 32/50. "
How high could his standards be, he's only willing to date women with low standards. I'm sorry but any 32 year old willing to date a 66 year old has very low standards. JMO
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| setting your standards too high - on purpose
Posted: 5/4/2008 11:55:42 AM | I totally agree with you. I have a very sexy fit (older then 50) body for my age and look very young. I work hard to maintan my body and looks by having a healthy lifestyle and young attitude so I am not settling. Often times, much younger men are attracted me, it is very nice and I am flattered but I would love to be in a relationship with someone near my age that takes care of themselves as I do. That is far and inbetween but I search and have fun while I am searching. I viewed a program recently that two dfferent attitudes that we should not be so picky as we get older and settle and the one said NO, there are Plenty of Fish hence this site..........I say keep on searching and not settle. Take care and Good Luck to you, me and all.  | |
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