| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 12:01:26 PM | Yes... about the little white lie thing. I at times feel that the truth is unnecessary and in certain situations can be downright crass. This comes down to the a similar scenario of "does this dress make my ass look fat". Sometimes the truth can be taken too personally. Even though it's really the fat in her ass that makes her ass look fat and has nothing to do with the dress...
I think many of us already know, generally speaking, that if a person tells a woman that something she wears looks hideous on her that she'll never wear it again even though she may have loved it. I think it goes the same for perfume?
So why should I tell her I think it smells bad when it's only my opinion. Afterall, others may love the smell of it as she does while others may dislike it as I do. What if we are no longer dating in two weeks? What good would it have done to punify her perfume with my opinion then?
On the other hand, if we keep dating and a relationship grows then my concern for the best way to handle my dilemma comes into more importance.
And thanks to all of you I am getting some great advice to draw upon. | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 12:23:27 PM |
So why should I tell her I think it smells bad when it's only my opinion. You don't tell her "it smells bad" because as you say, it probably doesn't smell bad to everyone. We all have different tastes. Some people like curry, bananas, blue cheese, cranberries... other people think these are the most disgusting flavours ever. But being bothered by it to the extent that you'll ask a bunch of strangers "help, what do I do" and failing to say something so simple as, "I hope you're not offended but that perfume really doesn't agree with me" or trying to manipulate her into not using it - doesn't make sense. It's even a good opportunity to see how selfish or egotistical she is, in my opinion.
I don't get why women allegedly want an honest and confident man but then advise actions that bespeak a lack of these things and a tendency towards manipulative doormattiness. You can express your opinion tactfully, it's a terribly superficial issue, not even as deeply personal as "I hate your laugh". I'm sure you could even get an amusing conversation out of it: things you like or dislike that no-one else seems to. Maybe she hates your aftershave really, or your shoes but doesn't know how to bring it up. | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 12:32:23 PM |
Be honest with her and please use some tact.
hey, YCG, remember that all the people telling you to be honest are female women of the opposite sex. remember that. remember it well, especially when she asks you if her clothes make her look fat. remember that
... HONESTY is the backbone of any relationship ... | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 12:34:26 PM |
I'm just going to tell her that I've been deceptive with her, that I'm going to come clean, and if she wants to break up with me that I don't blame her.
I think you can be guaranteed that she's gonna be pi$$ed for a bit, just because you didn't tell her what you really thought in the first place.
Just explain to her exactly what you explained to us...it was a new relationship, you knew SHE liked the perfume, but you didn't, and you just didn't want to hurt her feelings by telling her what you thought. Just make sure you let her know you didn't want to hurt her feelings...because that's no lie.
Maybe after this, she'll want to wear what pleases YOU more then what pleases HER. If she does, you got yourself a keeper... ...if she continues wearing it, she's wearing it out of spite, and quite frankly, doesn't care about your opinion anymore, seeing as you weren't honest the first time...
 | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 12:36:36 PM |
remember that. remember it well, especially when she asks you if her clothes make her look fat. remember that
Good grief, man, now you're scaring him....
We only ask about clothes after we've been in a relationship for years...now you've let our secret out of the bag...
| |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 12:59:51 PM | no perfume is realistically worth that much.
i'd make perfumes for a woman if she simply makes a request.
perhaps the perfume contains indole, a component of feces. lots of women put it on themselves. indole is volatile with steam and well, I won't say any more about it, but take it from a chemist that I am not fooling anyone about this. | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 1:17:04 PM | Your instinct to come clean is best.
You can do that... You are a big boy!
Gently and slowly tell her,"Honey I really enjoy spending time with you, but I have to come clean about that perfume you wear... I really don't like it. I didn't tell you in the beginning because you said you liked it so much, but I really ...can't. ..actually... stand it."
She probably has several that she already owns that she likes...
If you're good, she might even let you pick one! 
Or, if you have the means, ask if you can get her something of her choice, if she likes.
When you find a couple that smell good in the bottle(don't spray each one or you will have an overly stimulated nose and won't be able to tell any of them apart), have her test drive ONE for you.
After she has had it on for about ten minutes, you can tell if it is good blend with the chemistry of her body.
Be honest about it how it smells to you. Try a TINY bit of a few different ones on different pulse points.
When you find a really good scent, PRAISE her yumminess and tell her how turned on you are! lol 
BTW... Inside the wrists, ankles, neck, and groin are where those pulse points are...
Making it a slow, sexy adventure can be fun for you both.   | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 2:11:04 PM | Be diplomatic but tell her the truth. She probably doesn't realise the the perfume doesn't work with her body chemistry.
If she's an adult it won't be a big deal. If she can't handle it then you'll know now and can then begin the launch sequence. | |
|
| |
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/3/2008 11:45:56 PM | smells like the perfume is just the beginning...lol...
i can't stand people who make a point of "slipping" how much thier belongings cost, never mind those who brag.
i would be careful with your wallet buddy...
as for the perfume, cough a lot....gag a little like in dumb and dumber...lol...im kidding...maybe just be honest? tell her the more you smell it, the more you realize its not the greatest after all.
she is a woman, she has more than one bottle of perfume. | |
|
| |
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/4/2008 11:30:37 AM | Basically right now what you are saying is that wearing this overpriced perfume is more important to this woman than your relationship. Sounds like a real winner to me.
Be honest with her and tell her that you don't like her perfume. Tell her that when she asked you the first time you didn't know how to address the issue but now that you two are moving more into your relationship you would prefer for her not to wear it around you. Be specific with her about what it is about the scent you don't like. Is it too sweet? Too spicy? Does it remind you of something else unpleasant? And offer to take her shopping for a scent you both like. Let her pick one out for you as well.
Honestly, if she is that pissed off that you don't like her perfume that she chooses to break up with you over it, then your relationship was already doomed. | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/4/2008 12:57:35 PM |
I'm just going to tell her that I've been deceptive with her, that I'm going to come clean, and if she wants to break up with me that I don't blame her.
hee hee, that's funny. she'll be so relieved you're not telling her you have 6 kids in uganda or cheating on her with her grandmother that she'll use it when she's around other guys instead.
in fact - encourage this. will help keep them away from her. | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/4/2008 1:57:40 PM | I wouldn't be upset if I was told that by someone I was seeing. Actually, I'd be relieved. Shoot, when you're seeing someone, you generally want to be at your best for him.
The thought of spraying something on myself that evoked a gag reflex in him would leave me horrified, and I'd change it in a hurry.
...And only too true about each person's individual chemical skin reaction with (or to) a perfume being vastly different. I bought a rather expensive bottle of a certain scent once, that I just loved on others. I, however, smelled like I had just been in a wrestling match with Pepe le Pew.
Costly lesson, but well learned, lol.
Same with a person's reaction to certain scents....in my case, English Flannel in itself, no matter who the man, makes me almost 
Just tell her straight up - tactfully.
I can just imagine if she only brought it up because she was innocently fishing for a compliment, he gave one, and now she feels like she should wear it every time she sees him, lol.
Having visions now of how both of you would be silently thinking that you're eternally trapped with that same smell whenever you're together
Good luck!
hnh
 | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/4/2008 6:29:38 PM | I scrolled down and finally found someone with similar thoughts about this. I think she just might be overly fond of this perfume simply because it costs $300. Woo HOo!
Tell her it stinks.
MY ex was fond of $150 shirts, and now he is in deep financial trouble. I could see this coming long before he could, and to this day he still can't resist wasting money | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/4/2008 9:51:16 PM | This is how I deal with my disgust with the smell of most perfumes.
Take her to the mall.
Walk past a candle store/perfume store, and make sure you can smell something, and retch, cough, anything to get her attention.
She'll ask what it is (if she doesn't, I would leave her), and you say, "oh, the perfume over there... it's a bit overbearing..."
Hope that she asks, "what do you think of mine?" (if you've already told her otherwise, then sorry, this won't work)
If she asks, then tell her, "well to be perfectly honest... it's not really my favorite. Hey, as long as we're here, let's see if there's something else you can try that we'll both like, so we don't have to worry about it anymore. Whaddya think?"
Basically, manufacture a conversation that leads to your desired subject being brought up so it doesn't seem like as big of an issue as it would seem to be if you just went up to her and said, "babe, you smell like a flower took a piss on you."
So yeah, just my way of being subtle, and it works quite well with the ladies.
~ David | |
|
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/4/2008 10:41:32 PM | | You have to be honest with her about it. I know that is easier said then done, but really what else can you do? You can go on not saying anything about how much you hate her perfume and suffer or you can go out and buy perfume that you like and possibly insult her. I think that if she is a reasonable, rational person and you tell her kindly,gently and honestly that the smell bothers you then she will understand. It's just perfume after all. | |
|
| |
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/5/2008 11:20:41 AM | Find fragrances you love together. When I know my S.O. likes the way my perfume smells, I enjoy wearing it even more. Maybe hide the perfume and when it can't be found offer to go pick one out with her. Have her try some out and when you find one you like - tell her you just love it and would like to get it for her right away - you can even tell her then that you like it so much more than the one that's "missing".
Positive works better than negative every time. | |
|
| |
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/5/2008 12:22:03 PM | There are indeed a lot of fragrances out there that are a trigger for me to get a pretty bad migraine more or less immediately. So maybe try "migraine" rather than "allergy".
If she's ever had a migraine in her life she will understand how bad her perfume makes you feel, literally, and if she likes you at all she will stop using that devilish migraine trigger around you. And then you could offer to go perfume shopping with her to make up for the "loss" of her prefered frangrance, picking out a scent that both of you like. | |
|
| |
| |
| How do you tell her that her $300 perfume is smells terrible.
Posted: 5/20/2008 4:01:14 PM | LOL okay so I asked my bf If I spent an outrageous amount of money on a perfume that you think smells like dirty feet would you tell me? His answer was yes he would tell me because he's the one that has to smell me. I liked this answer.
If it was me I would rather that you tell me than to continue to allow me to walk around stinking. | |
|
| |
Home
login 
